An old guy talked to me on the bus today...

Ames

Ames

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And according to him, there are secret tunnels miles below Mt. Everest where gods live.

Post your crazy tales of people you meet on the streets.

No pedobear jokes plzkthx..
 
it happened when i first came to canada , on the way back from school i saw this old guy rolling around a trollly (those ones that you put paper in or whatever) anyways as i walked closer to him he stood still and saluted me :S .
 
some drunk once told me I'm a true English Gentleman...

I'm Scottish
 
I always see loads of nutters.

We have a local one who we nicknamed "flaps" due to the trapper hat he wears with really long ear pieces.
He is about 70 and a complete loon, talks gibberish, collects stones and fag ends in his pockets (and god knows what else), he re rolls the fag ends and smokes them as far as i can see.

One day a care worker from the home he stays at tried collecting him in a car, he got in the front seat backwards and caused a lot of fuss.

One day he i was just passing him and he put his arm round me and started pointing to a field saying "the other side!" "the other side!" .....i legged it.
Most of the time he mumbles gibberish, the only other thing i have understood was when he said "merry christmas" to me.

I've seen him running round a post box 3 times, jumping in someones garden and tyding their bins and then lying down on the front of their car once, he's a natural born comedian.

He has become a bit of a cult classic with me and my mates, infact we even made a hilarious film about him.
Hehe i might have to show you guys one day.

There are many other loons about, including "pointy face" "lovatt 2" etc.
All kinda "in" jokes with mates etc.
 
I saw a guy on campus talking on a cell phone. I thought he was a prof at first then I realized that he was wearing all this old shabby clothing and his hair was all messy and his cellphone was a tin can.

I also talked to a guy on the bus who asked me how his flashlight worked. I told him it was an LED light and I wasn't sure how they work. He then made me promise not to work for the CIA
 
In the London underground, I once saw a man running down the large stairs in front of the big mass of people; holding up what looked like a bible and shouting "judgement day is coming!"
Another time in the street, a fat old lady came up to me randomly and started telling me her life story; as if I was a close relative or something, when I had never seen here in my life, I was listening for like 5 minutes till I made my excuses..
 
Does anybody here live near Boston? If so, chances are they know Harvard Square well. It's the area where all the college kids come to hang out, and it's awesome. Tons of live music, delicious food, great independent stores, perfect skatespots... but also, countless sketchy homeless people. Some of them are just normal folks down on their luck, but most are a bit "off". I had a great experience, where one walked up to me and asked if I rode the skateboard I had in my hand. When he found out I did, he got into a huge speech about being careful, as skateboarding "causes flat feet". He then suggested I get into "ancient Chinese magical medicine" to cure the inevitable flat feet. We talked about this for like half an hour. It freaking ruled.
 
I was walking down the street listening to music, and an old guy comes up and says "if you keep doing that, you'll be deaf before you're 20". I said thanks and walked off.

I once saw a woman walking down a street shouting, as if she was arguing with herself. And when I mean shouting, I mean shouting. She looked like she was going to beat someone up. There was also another woman shouting something on the metro to some guy the other day, and she wouldn't shut up. I dunno if it was the same woma (sure reminded me or her tohugh), but when she got off everyone had a right good laugh. :D

There's also this old bum guy who lives in our town...we call him the bag man because he carries loads of sports bags full of stuff (no, I don't know what's in them :p ). He looks like what Rob Zombie would look like if he didn't shower. We occasionally see him pacing back and forth in front of a bench for some reason.
 
I live in a really small town of about 200 people or so. We have several potheads, potgrowers, and a pair of crackhead brothers. One of these brothers is called Bubbles. He's been blind for life, and his eyes bug out pretty far, probably where he got the name. My brother and some of his friends messed with him one day by sneaking up behind him and saying in a gangsta voice "Bubbles, you got some crack?" with him replying "Who dere? Who dere?" In an accent just like the farmer guy off The Waterboy. I failed to mention he shot a guy dead in the past and didnt go to jail for it. And he lives less than a mile from me. ;( Also, there's another guy in a town close to me called Snarepole. Don't know how he got the name. He basically wanders around town and talks to everybody. He also talks exactly like the farmer off The Waterboy. He's sort of crazy, but he's also liked and known by everyone in the county basically. Sort of the village idiot i guess, but in a lovable way.
 
Lethal8472 said:
I live in a really small town of about 200 people or so. We have several potheads, potgrowers, and a pair of crackhead brothers. One of these brothers is called Bubbles. He's been blind for life, and his eyes bug out pretty far, probably where he got the name.
Click to expand...

Like that guy from Mr. Deeds?
 
coming home from school one day i noticed an elderly man, maybe 75-80 years old, walking down the street ina a nazi uniform, with the ss patches and whatnot. i asked him what he was doing, and he told me that he was the leader of a political party called the united solialists of america (or something along those lines), and he gave me a sheet of party ideals, all sorts of lunacies about china was going to invade us in a few years, and that the government secretly discovered the cure for cancer but never released it to the public. kinda weird. but a few months ago, i read that that gentleman recently got deported because of his history in the nazi party during ww2.
 
I wonder if it counts when I'm the one doing the weird things...

I play a game called Geocaching, where you have a GPS and get coordinates from the geocaching site and then go off to find caches. People without GPS and not in the game are considered 'muggles' and we must do whatever we can to keep them away from the caches.

One day I was going for a cache, and two bikers came down and asked me what I was doing, so I started acting like the guy in the train station of HL2, "They're always departing but they're never arriving... you never see them go, they're always full..." until they just rode away.
 
don_johnson said:
coming home from school one day i noticed an elderly man, maybe 75-80 years old, walking down the street ina a nazi uniform, with the ss patches and whatnot. i asked him what he was doing, and he told me that he was the leader of a political party called the united solialists of america (or something along those lines), and he gave me a sheet of party ideals, all sorts of lunacies about china was going to invade us in a few years, and that the government secretly discovered the cure for cancer but never released it to the public. kinda weird. but a few months ago, i read that that gentleman recently got deported because of his history in the nazi party during ww2.
Click to expand...
Whoa that's crazy. Scary to imagine him like that suited up and everything back when he had an entire nation with him.
 
A woman asked me "Do you have stomach aches?"

Me: Yes
Woman: Ahhh, poor young soul, at such a age....
Me: *starts to walk away*
Woman: *grabs my arm* Do you belive in god?
Me: No, let go of me.
Woman: This lost sheep blah blah blah......
Me: *Runs away*
Woman: *Chases After me* Do not run! God is blah blah blah...

:|
 
Well, this didn't happen to me but It happened to my friends. My friends brian and gabe were coming over to my house and they were really stoned so they took the bus and on the bus was this older mexican lady that had a McDonalds pin on. My friend nick is a bit of a dumbass and got really hungry and decided to ask her if she had any food. He asks her and she reaches into her bag and pulls out a crumb donut. He eats it, but my friend brian pretends that he isn't hungry (really he is just freaked out). So nick eats it and is still hungry so he asks her AGAIN, at which point they start to pull up to thier stop. So she looks into her bag and says "Do you like fish?" In very broken spanglish. Nick and Brian ran off of the bus.


EDIT: I am also reminded of a very funny crazy guy. In california there is a place called venice beach where the things they sell are mainly: Bongs, peircings, food, and random souvenier shit. There is this crazy guy that has a guitar and goes around on rollerblades with his guitar and a little mini amp singing about random shit. He is very clean but ragedy looking, he's famous around these parts.
 
I went fishing with a crazy old guy in Australia.

He told me he once punched a kangaroo in the face and knocked him out.
 
There is a mental hospital down the street from my school. There is a guy there everyone calls the Quaker for some reason. He always has a newspaper folded under his arms and he does a wierd thing where he suddenly shoots his elbow up into the air (it's hard to explain). Once a friend of mine was walking back from the pitch that's also down the road form school (he was at PE). The Quaker shouted hello at him and he said hi back. The Quaker threw €2 at his head, hit him right between the eyes. Part of my class was doing a prodject on the hospital and one of them got a look at the paper. It's from the 60's!
 
I went fishing with a crazy old guy in Australia.

He told me he once punched a kangaroo in the face and knocked him out.
Click to expand...

Thats bloody funny :P
 
One time when I was wee lad I was on an excursion, I was at McDonalds (Dude, we had McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinn0r :x) and there was this middle-aged guy walking around without bending his knees talking gibberish with a bad of McDonalds. I took a photo of him.

Hell, i'll scan it in tommorow for you all! :D
 
It was a spur the moment type thing. I got told off but it was worth it.
 
this drunk stoned black person with a guitar came up to me and two mates ( one of whom had an 8th on his person) and started playing the guitar! and talking to us about random shit like the big issue

and then a policeman came up and asked us what he was doing, wether he was annoying us and asked us if he was trying to sell us weed :p

we were like nah he just singing to us :o

and the poluice man walke daway and the of his face guitra man said thanks for saving my ass i'll have to deal u some weed some other time then :hmph: and held his hand out for money, reaisied we werent giving him any walked off and phoned his mate:p
 
i was waiting at a fish-and-chip van a while ago with some other villagers, when a very large woman and her insane dog walked up and stood by a hedge. The dog attacked another dog that was there, and the woman, with a precision managed only by the truely drunk, fell sideways into the hedge.

we helped her up (she was damned heavy :|), she took her food, and walked away. extremely slowly.
 
My grandparents used to live near an home for elderly people with alziehmers (spelling) every so often you would see some old guy walk down the street in his pyjamas talking to everyone as if it was a perfectly normal day in the 1930s.

I hated it when one of them would shuffle down the street moaning, as I was only 6 or 7 I thought they were zombies!
 
We were in Seattle one time and there was this old scraggly guy that was talking to everyone in the middle of the sidewalk and spraying spit on us so my dad got the video camera and started filming him. He started chasing my dad and saying stuff like 'come back here you chicken sh*t, you communist nazi'.
There were lots of homeless people there.
 
don_johnson said:
coming home from school one day i noticed an elderly man, maybe 75-80 years old, walking down the street ina a nazi uniform, with the ss patches and whatnot. i asked him what he was doing, and he told me that he was the leader of a political party called the united solialists of america (or something along those lines), and he gave me a sheet of party ideals, all sorts of lunacies about china was going to invade us in a few years, and that the government secretly discovered the cure for cancer but never released it to the public. kinda weird. but a few months ago, i read that that gentleman recently got deported because of his history in the nazi party during ww2.
Click to expand...

That uniform is probably worth a lot these days, he should ebay it.
 
There was a guy in the middle of the high street, looking up into the air and swinging his yoyo. I don't think he realised he was holding up 20-30 cars behind him
 
Joims said:
this drunk stoned black person with a guitar came up to me and two mates ( one of whom had an 8th on his person) and started playing the guitar! and talking to us about random shit like the big issue

and then a policeman came up and asked us what he was doing, wether he was annoying us and asked us if he was trying to sell us weed :p
Click to expand...
Sounds like a racist cop.
 
doubt it the guy is known for being dodgy:p every thinks he is cool but he sat behind my gf on the bus home n he is really scary
 
Some woman forced a crappy little flower in tinfoil at me, then demanded money for it. I got a pound out and she told me they were £2.

I gave her £2.

...I'm too weak-willed. :o
 
I've had a few experiences with "funny" people but can only remember one that happened almost a year ago.

I was on a boat holiday and we moared somewhere outside of Norwich. I went up to the shopping centre near the football stadium and came back like an hour later. When I got back there was this kid who was about 12-14 wondering around. He came up to me and said he found a fag on the ground and asked if it was mine. I don't smoke so I said no but it was just to start a conversation. He told me his parent's went out and he couldn't get in the house and just kept yapping on. He was one of those people that you couldn't tell to go away (in a sort of nice way).

He then asked if he could get on the boat. By then I thought he was getting a little to friendly so I said I had to go because dinner was ready. Eventrully he went and started talking to the people next to use.

There was also another one someone else we moared, but we managed to avoid him. :p He was so well dressed with clean new shoes and a suit but crazy never the less.
 
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