BF 2 mercenary - bodyguard for hire, 10 hours.

CptStern

suckmonkey
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hehe this guy is actually serious


"Important: I will only follow reasonable orders. What's a reasonable order? Well it's NOT telling me to fly around in circles while humming Broadway musicals over voice chat. As your mercenary, I'll be willing to follow some pretty crazy orders of yours, but it needs to make some sense. For example, you could ask me to ram a Mi-17 helicopter into a pesky enemy Blackhawk a few times, and I'll happily obey. But I'm not going to do it for an hour :-P Also, I'm not going to help you "pad your stats". No cheating or any unethical ways of playing, sorry.


I've always wanted to do a weird auction, so this is it. It's completely legit though, I have a 100% Ebay feedback rating. This can make a great gift for a friend. How many friends get a mercenary for a gift? Hopefully I can get a few bucks from the auction and buy me a hamburger or something. Maybe I can tell the cashier at Burger King that "I killed hundreds of foreigners to buy this hamburger." :-)





heh, I can come up with some good uses for him:


"hey Merc ..***n towards that enemy tank while I fill up with health"


"hey merc go get me that buggy ..and make it snappy"


"hey merc, that teamate of mine is running for the helicoptor ..I want it ...shoot him now"


"hey merc, invite other people into our squad and refer to me as "M'Lord" ...as in "the Chinese are regrouping M'Lord" or "We await your orders M'Lord"
 
AHAHAHAHA People are actually bidding on it! That is the best lol, make points in BF2 and get money :P
 
What a great idea!
Id live to have a guy just trying to take out one guy on a server you hate.
 
Dude provided it doesnt go above 10 dollars, as crazy as it might sound, im going to bid on it! I cant count how many times i get stuck in bases that are taken over by the enemy, and im the squad leader but nobody spawns on me to help.....
 
Shit, I was going to do that, then I realized, I work a full time job...that wouldn't work :(

Maybe I can get my account padded up to like 100k points, then sell it

I'll bet people would pay over 100 bux for that account.
 
CyberPitz said:
Shit, I was going to do that, then I realized, I work a full time job...that wouldn't work :(

Maybe I can get my account padded up to like 100k points, then sell it

I'll bet people would pay over 100 bux for that account.

The FBI would come for you as it is illegal oO. And imagine someone using your account, with your nickname. Wouldn't you feel dirty? What if he turned out to be an asshole and everybody in the internets would be like "LOLOLOL Cyb3rPitz is the biggest dumbass in the universe!!!11oneone", eh? EH?
 
Unfocused said:
The FBI would come for you as it is illegal oO. And imagine someone using your account, with your nickname. Wouldn't you feel dirty? What if he turned out to be an asshole and everybody in the internets would be like "LOLOLOL Cyb3rPitz is the biggest dumbass in the universe!!!11oneone", eh? EH?
cyberpitz would be too busy buying stuff with his $100 to worry about some 14 year old kid who got tk'd and had his chopper stollen by a cyberpitz doppleganger
 
kaf11 said:
cyberpitz would be too busy buying stuff with his $100 to worry about some 14 year old kid who got tk'd and had his chopper stollen by a cyberpitz doppleganger
Heh, I'd be like "BUY ANOTHER COPY OF GAME with 50...the other 50...goes towards my new stereo system :D

PS I'd just recreate the account of "CyberPitz" and be like

Google CyberPitz
and
Cyb3rPitz

see who is the real one ;)

That is..if I really cared enough D:

OR I COULD STAT PAD A NEW ACCOUNT NAME SO ITS SOMETHING RANDOM LIKE "G0ATSE" :D
 
How far do you reckon this guy will go?
I wonder if he will suicide to let you get his DAO-12 or AT kit?
Will he let you strap c4 to his jeep, so he can drive into a base and detonate?
I dont have an ebay account, so i cant ask.
 
AHahah.

This reminds me of this game me and my friend were playing today, I was squad leader.

So we get nailed defending a point at sharky, and I spawn at a base with a truck/van. I get in the van, and see he spawned a bit on the other side of the base. I get a bit close, honk a few times to tell him to get in, and he just sits and stares at me.

I go "get in man, what you doing?".

He shoots the ground infront of him and then looks back at me, then shoots the ground again.

So I drive up to him, and I felt like a ****ing taxi driver. Ahahaha, that was hillarious.
 
"Hey Merc... do my homework!"

"Hey Merc... could you teamkill everyone?"
The possibilities.
 
I saw this like 5 minutes ago on Attack Of The Show "It came from eBay", lol, that gives this guy some publicity :)
 
Heh, the auction is at $9.12 already, looks like he'll be able to buy a few burgers.

Edit:
And if I get killed, you can pick up my unlocked kits
Huh? If anyone gets killed near me and i know they had an unlocked kit i usually take it. I dont ask, they are dead, they arent gonna need it lol:rolling:
 
i want one...

"he shot at me, go kill him"
"WTF did you say to me!?!" *back slaps across face*
 
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