Bikini Inspectors? I want to be one!

CyberPitz

CyberPitz

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The Broken Springs Village Council Monday night passed a new ordinance, just in time for summer that may affect many residents who sunbathe in the village limits. The ordinance, entitled the Public Bikini Act will require all potential sunbathers to have their bathing suits inspected and authorized by the Chief of Police before wearing them out of doors.

The suits will be inspected for compliance with community standards which includes proper coverage of one's cleavage and general good taste in fashion to make sure that no lewd or obscene bikinis harm the eyesight of any 80 something year old neighbors looking out their back windows with binoculars.

The Village Council passed the Bikini ordinance by a 5-2 vote, with Mike Cinderellagrass, Will Duster, Curly Headed Sandy, and the Chaddwick husband-wife duo voting in favor, and Bill Pezdispensor and Peter Faygo voting against the resolution.
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http://www.shoutwire.com/viewstory/78685/Michigan_Town_Cracks_Down_on_Lewd_Bikinis

Sounds like some old men just want to touch girlies bikinis. I know I do!
 
****ing ridiculous. essentially they're gonna make sure everyones clothing is all politically correct?
 
At work again are we Pitz? :P
 
uhhh... satire? i mean look at the names, lol... Mike Cinderellagrass, Curly Headed Sandy,"Village Attorney" Fred DeFrankfurter, Daniel Shame... I mean come on, the town is called "Broken Springs" :laugh:
 
Damn, I wish they had one in Spain in May.
Seriously, I was on a beache and this HUGE woman with HUGE breasts was sunbathing with a SLIM man.

It was just so unattractive. She was literally a stranded whale.
 
The suits will be inspected for compliance with community standards which includes proper coverage of one's cleavage and general good taste in fashion to make sure that no lewd or obscene bikinis harm the eyesight of any 80 something year old neighbors looking out their back windows with binoculars.
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Fake as hell, but this still made me lol.

Didn't mean for that to rhyme. :|
 
How would you cover a cleavage with a bikini? It boggles the mind.
 
lol rhymes with roll and bowl and knoll and hole, and goal
 
And Goatse.

What, everything rhymes/mixes/adds with Goatse.
 
Next they will be inspecting the sunblock you wear. Making sure it is at least factor 15+ or prison 4 life.
lol!
 
Shit, I'd have the first city where public nudity would be legal. Not because I'm a perv *well, I AM one of them...* but because I guarantee when you get kids used to seeing girls naked all the time, they, in my head, won't have sex so early, thus less teenage parents, and less idiot kids! WOO.
 
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