Blue ****ing balls

Kamikazie

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I have the worst case right now. I was doing the deed last night in my lady friend's car, but I didn't have a condom. So I kept thinking that I was riding a horse or trying to succeed at the riding bull thing. They all worked, but now i'm feeling the pain. Even with the hydrocodon that I have to take from my accident! Now it wont get hard since i'm taking the pills and I can't get rid of the pain, and omfg it hurts.

I guess the point of this thread is for me to inform you of my pain and for you to tell me about your past experiences with it for my entertainment.
 
You know one way to fix it?

Cut them off. Yourself.
 
I do have that new single blade razor that I have to break in.
 
I've had 'em. I've also had some women tell me that blue balls is an urban legend - if any ladies are reading this, it's no joke.
 
ever heard of whiskey dick?

limp dick?

Out of order?

drunk dick?


Yeah. The main thing you need is to give it time to wear off. However, if you get drunk, it may also help.

It may dull the pain and it will give you a different set of issues to deal with. being drunk and all. It will take your mind off it.

FIRST Make sure you can consume alcohol while taking your pain killers from the car accident. Read the label. You probably shouldn't drink while taking them, but if it doesn't mention alcohol on the warnings, then you'll be okay.
 
The key to prevention is regular exercise.














You know what I mean.
 
I can't "exercise" for the next 8 hours because of the pain killer. BUT, there is no mention of alcohol on the bottle.

.'. Liquor cabinet, here I come!
 
What the hell, I've never had this and it's not like I get relieved everytime I get aroused.

So you can't get hard but still managed to get blue balls? Or, if you were hard last night that means you are able to get hard, so work it ;)
 
What the hell, I've never had this and it's not like I get relieved everytime I get aroused.

So you can't get hard but still managed to get blue balls? Or, if you were hard last night that means you are able to get hard, so work it ;)

I wasn't on my codon last night, but I woke up this morning and started feeling the pain after I took my pill. Which I still have the pain and can't get aroused.
 
1. close internet browser
2. open up dirty little hidden folder
3. box with the heat-seeking moisture missile
4. ???
5. profit

-dodo

Edit:
This thread is kind of gross :3
stay out of this >: [
/jk
 
1. close internet browser
2. open up dirty little hidden folder
3. box with the heat-seeking moisture missile
4. profit

-dodo

This plan isn't correct, where is step "???"?
 
1. close internet browser
2. open up dirty little hidden folder
3. box with the heat-seeking moisture missile
4. profit

-dodo

Edit:

stay out of this >: [
/jk

Can I just get Phobie to handle the problem? Seems that I can bypass steps 1-3.

EDIT:

LMAO Jimbo!
 
alf_fappintime.gif
 
Funnily enough, I was just talking about that kind of stuff with someone.
 
I never actually felt "pain" from blue balls. Is there an actual "pain" I haven't experienced? Or is the word "pain" just an over exaggerated word for being extremely horny and not being able to do anything about it?
 
No exaggeration. It's like someone is stepping on your balls and you can't do anything about it.
 
I never actually felt "pain" from blue balls. Is there an actual "pain" I haven't experienced? Or is the word "pain" just an over exaggerated word for being extremely horny and not being able to do anything about it?

it's real.

There are varying degrees of severeness, but it can feel like you have been kicked in the balls buy an Olympic athlete, and the pain lasts hours if not the entire day.
 
Shoulda just wanked it off on her face and been done with it. tbh
 
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