Cooking out? Think twice!

[kepler]

In the world of HL2, the world is dominated by alien invaders. Horrible alien monsters have turned most people into zombies. Overall the world has turned into a pretty crappy place.

I am not sure what the exact chain of events were that led up to this situation. What I do know, though, is that almost everywhere I go in this world, there are lots and lots of propane tanks just sitting around for no apparent reason.

Obviously, when the apocalypse came, the majority of people were wandering around with 20 pound tanks of fuel for their gas grills.

If reality ever imitates art, you should all take this lesson to heart. The human race should spend more time responding to alien threats, and a little less time getting ready for backyard barbecues.

 

[ríomhaire]

Don't forget the hundreds of barrels of oil dumped in the canals. No wonder we have a fuel shortage!

 

[ChiliFan]

I'm sure Health and Safety will have something to say about this.

 

[gFrohman]

Al Gore's gonna cry about the ocean shores drying up.

 

[kepler]

I forgot to mention the many barrels of flammable material that seem to just be casually stored on every street corner, and in every sort of building and room. Oh, and crates of ammo and munitions. These are stored typically in public stairwells and in the corners of parking garages.

 

[Maturin]

Oh, and crates of ammo and munitions. These are stored typically in public stairwells and in the corners of parking garages.

Hello? It's the ex-Soviet bloc.

 

[Hectic Glenn]

It's just not realistic is it? I mean come on Valve, do try better. Realism = fun, don't you know?

There should be mini games whereby you have to struggle to open a metal hatch to urinate before you do so inside the HEV suit, causing a fatal short circuit. This is real depth.

 

[Maturin]

It's just not realistic is it? I mean come on Valve, do try better. Realism = fun, don't you know?

There should be mini games whereby you have to struggle to open a metal hatch to urinate before you do so inside the HEV suit, causing a fatal short circuit. This is real depth.

Better yet, urine-based crowbar maintenance. How else can you neutralize the pH of the highly caustic zombie blood stains?

 

[TheOneFreeMan]

Did you ever consider that the propane tanks were put there because of preparations for alien invasion? Quite clearly someone has realised Gordon's future need for handy tanks of gas to throw at his enemies and arranged for them to be plentiful.

In an upcoming Half Life prequel, we see the President giving a speech on the importance of self-contained barbeques, while the G-Man is spotted mysteriously in the camera behind him.

 

[Maturin]

Don't be daft. The governments of the world aren't that smart. They're short-sighted and assumed that the Combine were only after fossil fuels to power what was undoubtedly an SUV-powered war machine.

It was appeasement. Take our oil and go.

Secret reserves were stored in Ravenholm and its associated mines so Wall Street could still fly around in private jets.

 

[G(ordon)-man]

****ing NWO does nothing.

 

[kepler]

There should be mini games whereby you have to struggle to open a metal hatch to urinate before you do so inside the HEV suit, causing a fatal short circuit. This is real depth.

Maybe there should be status bar for the urine containment inside the HEV. As it approaches maximum, your movement starts to slow down. When you exceed it, your screen gets a yellow tint that becomes increasingly opaque. When you can no longer see, you drown.

 

[gFrohman]

haha - or maybe a poop meter. If you exceed it, citizens start to comment on your offensive odor.

 

[TheOneFreeMan]

haha - or maybe a poop meter. If you exceed it, citizens start to comment on your offensive odor.

New Combine radio chatter!

"*crk* I smell something. *crk*"
"Outbreak! Outbreak! Outbreak!"

 

[Danimal]

I forgot to mention the many barrels of flammable material that seem to just be casually stored on every street corner, and in every sort of building and room. Oh, and crates of ammo and munitions. These are stored typically in public stairwells and in the corners of parking garages.

Blame Frohman.

 

[kepler]

Did you ever consider that the propane tanks were put there because of preparations for alien invasion? Quite clearly someone has realised Gordon's future need for handy tanks of gas to throw at his enemies and arranged for them to be plentiful.

In an upcoming Half Life prequel, we see the President giving a speech on the importance of self-contained barbeques, while the G-Man is spotted mysteriously in the camera behind him.

The G-Man will be wearing a chef's hat. And when your suit fills up, it starts leaving a yellow and brown trail wherever you go. And Alyx won't ride in the car with you any more.

 

[coheedswicked]

not to ruin your fun or anything but... there are plenty of opportunities for gordon to just use an actual toilet (even if they are really disgusting)

 

[kepler]

Have to remove the HEV suit to do that. Hey! They could introduce a new monster! Butt Crabs!

 

[MuToiD_MaN]

Al Gore's gonna cry about the ocean shores drying up.

No he only cares about global warming causing the ocean levels to rise. He'd claim a victory over this threat!

 

[coheedswicked]

Have to remove the HEV suit to do that. Hey! They could introduce a new monster! Butt Crabs!

haha. i was thinking the same thing!