Create parody about anything Half-Life 2

[Crowbar-at-hand]

I will start...




Gordon is blowing up some important stuff in Kleiners lab cause he's bored but Kleiner doesn't notice because he's working on a really ineresting invention.


Alyx comes running: We gotta get out of here! SCANNERS!
Gordon looks at the "scanners"
Gordon: Hey that's not scanners, it's just some computer geeks who were spying on you in your shower!
Alyx: How do you know?
Gordon: Don't you know about the great organisation that I am part of that pretty much spend their spare time to get a good look of you in the shower?
Alyx is very upset and runs away to cry.
Gordon thinks back at the last meeting...

Gordon, G-man and a few other geeks are watching Alyx as she is showering.
G-man drewls and says: Well well.. isn't this just like... old times?
Gordons pet headcrab jumps up and down to get a better look.
The computer geeks are capturing the moment with their brand new digital video cameras.

Kleiner: There finally, this is my new invention, it will give us the victory in this war against the combine!
Gordon:..........
Gordon throws a grenade at the machine and it blows up.
Kleiner fall down on his knees and shouts: TRAITOR!!!
Gordon: Huh? Was it something I said?
Gordons pet headcrab rolls around on the floor laughing.
G-man: Gordon, there is something that you need to do for me.
Gordon: What?
G-man: Rice and shine and smell the ashes.
Gordon: THAT'S DISGUSTING!!!
Gordon uses the manipulator to carry G-man out of their HQ and throws him away in a dumpster.
G-man: Pay attention mr. Freeman, I'm only going to say this once... UP YOURS!!!
Gordon shuts the door and lock it behind him.

 

[Slacker]

Wouldn't this be better in fanfiction? :\

 

[Crowbar-at-hand]

damn I should've know.

 

[Crowbar-at-hand]

For all you Shepard Fan, p.s I am not. Anyways here it is:

Gman: Good-day Mr.Shepard

Shepard: Wait a second, do I get food on this opsrey?

Gman: Uhhh, **opens book of quotes** You will have to wait and-

Shepard: No, dude, I'm serious, the only thing I ate today was like a bagel I found in the cafeteria.

Gman: Uhhh, I have some gum, and a quarter

Shepard: Well then I can't stay here man, plus I gotta take a crap the size of Elvis right now, why can't you put me in the tram with Gordon? Atleast then I can play cards with him for eternity.

Gman: WELL I'M SORRY THAT IT DIDN'T MEET YOUR REQUIREMENTS!!! **sobbing** It's my first time doing this! GIMMIE A BREAK!

Shepard: Awww, come here man, gimmie a hug

**They hug**

Shepard: Yoink, I got your briefcase, maybe I'll see YOU up ahead....dumbass, nobody f**ks over the USMC.

Gman: NOOOO, GIMMIE THAT BACK! I CAN'T STAND LIVING ALONE!

**Shepard walks through portal**

Gman: Well, there is always a sequel **lights up a cig**