Death by Girlfriend

[rambler]

Ok she's in the bathroom, my god she's moved in! there are earrings everywhere, knickers in my washing, Cosmopolitan by my bed. lip balm. contact lenses. so... many... clothes...

endless bloody cups of tea..

I actually can't get rid of her, when did this happen?

She slowly and covertly snuck her way into my flat, it must have been planned, it must have! it's their way, they get you without you even realising and then it's too late.

she's always here... my god! I'm not even sure she has a flat of her own anymore. what if she marries me without me knowing! jesus christ, i could wake up with a wife tomorrow!! maybe i'll try to go out without her, and actually physically not be able to, maybe i'm victim of some sort of female mind meld initiated by making me listen to her read out articles from cosmopolitan...

she's smothering me with her subtly insinuated accusations that there's not enough chocolate in the fridge... don't get me wrong, i like her, but space is important...

I MISS MY FINAL FRONTIER!!





If i don't get away from her soon I think I might have to get her eyeliner and shove it though my eye...

AND I invite all of you to whine about your girlfriends.. please, the more of you that do it the better i'll feel.. it's like AA only for women.. WA.

 

[Solaris]

Just ****ing tell her you hate her ffs and stop making threads on it.

 

[Que-Ever]

I would have found that post brilliant if I hadn't known beforehand you were a dumbass.

 

[rambler]

you're an angry man sol, i don't hate her and this is the very first thread on it..

 

[Que-Ever]

The first thread about it directly, yeah, but there's been at least one other thread where there was some sort of inference of the situation, and countless posts directly or indirectly about your hate for your girlfriend.

 

[Murray_H]

OH MY GOSH YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?!?!?!?!

I feel so inadequate because I live on the internet. What is girl? What is friend? :O

 

[rambler]

well if it annoys you so much don't post here, i'm not a nasty person, you were the one that called ME a dumbass so i think the evidence stands in my favour.

now can those of you WITH girlfriends please help to ease my pain. i just need to know there are those of you who suffer as i do.

 

[Que-Ever]

I never said you were a nasty person, and I never said I wasn't.

And here's a bit of advice, don't start relationships with people you don't like :/

I always have so much fun being Cpt. Obvious.

 

[Shift]

Yes thank you for letting everyone know you have a girlfriend, would you like a medal? Its nothing to show off about, ive been there twice, but i dont go on computer game forums and start bragging about it, using some made up scenerio to cover up your true intentions, and what was that? You were telling me to get a life in that other topic?

 

[Evo]

..wow

How many times have you now mentioned this girl?

Do you get thrills off of telling us all about it?

:hmph:

 

[Shift]

Yeah he seems to think that mentioning that he has a girlfriend sort of indicates that he has a life on the forum, my god i have seen it so many times on a forum its now becoming ridiculous, looks like its about backfire rambler because we are a lot smarter to fall for a shit gag like that...

 

[Core407]

Pull a Costanza and make her want to leave.

 

[CyberPitz]

MAN, my girlfriend just got done giving me head, and she just up and left!

I MEAN WTF?! GOD HOW STUPID CAN GIRLS BE?!

Did I mention she just gave me head?

 

[Absinthe]

HEY GUYS I'M ON THE INTERNET TELLING YOU I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND

 

[CrazyHarij]

can i have your autograph?

 

[Evo]

Just a sec..

/enters semi-Rambler mode

Right guys, Thursday night i was out and met this girl, she was a f**king minger but i thought what the hell and got off with her. Mind you i was pissed off my head at the time

Then last ngiht was out again and met this absolutely stunning girl and ended up shagging her, i don't care what my girlfirend thinks, she's a whore who has moved in with me

What should i do guys?!

Ahem.

Yes there is some relevance to what i did..except minger, shagging and girlfriend parts...think they were only additions but ya don't see me making a big thing of it wherever i frikin post!

:hmph:

 

[rambler]

Yes thank you for letting everyone know you have a girlfriend, would you like a medal? Its nothing to show off about, ive been there twice, but i dont go on computer game forums and start bragging about it, using some made up scenerio to cover up your true intentions, and what was that? You were telling me to get a life in that other topic?

yes a medal would be lovely.

and when did i tell you to get a life?

and lol, i love the way you say you've had TWO!! girlfriends!! what a pathetically small number..

anyway people, you obviously have no sense of humour so just let this thread die.

 

[CyberPitz]

yes a medal would be lovely.

and when did i tell you to get a life?

and lol, i love the way you say you've had TWO!! girlfriends!! what a pathetically small number..

anyway people, you obviously have no sense of humour so just let this thread die.

You fail at life by the way.

 

[Evo]

You fail spectacularly life by the way.

:thumbs:

 

[Que-Ever]

No sense of humor?! This from the guy who just posted cillit bang and some gay chavs "rapping".

 

[Core407]

Can you send me her hairbrush so I have something to sniff while I fantasize about a real woman?

 

[KagePrototype]

This one didn't last very long. :|