Had the longest walk home of my life last night

Dan

Dan

Tank
Joined
May 28, 2003
Messages
4,186
Reaction score
3
Ok same story as usual, went to my friends birthday, got trashed woowoo drinking so crazy'n all that. And I left around 1ish I think. I don't know why.

The walk home should be about 25 minues but I felt like it ended up taking 2 hours. And that's with beer induced time acceleration. I got way off course, ended up in some sort of tunnel/parkade with a fence at one end. So of course I tried to climb over the fence. Fall crack my head open, blood all over my hair. My pants are all ripped up from the fence. My hands are also bloody from holding them over my head. I walk back the way I came and probably 20 minutes later realize I'm missing credit card, ID, all that shit. Walk back to the fence where I fell and see it all scattered on the ground still there. Walk around all of downtown for about another 2 hours mostly in the wrong direction and finally get to my apartment and collapse into bed. Somehow I''m still alive this morning but my head hurts like hell and all my clothes are ruined. But I'm pretty proud of hanging onto my cards, my phone, my keys, my jacket, my shoes and what little money I had left.

Oh yeah, and there's definitely no parkade or fences on the route home. I don't know where I was
 
And the moto of this story kids? Dont get drunk!

or was it 'Dont buy drugs...become a rock star and they give you them for free'? gah i can never remember.
 
I had to initiate a town-wide search for my friend after he ran off when he saw his girlfriend kissing someone else.

Found him though. :E
 
Hmm, I've never gotten so drunk that I have no idea where I'm going...

Then again, that's why I don't like to get drunk at a place other than home so I don't have to walk around or anything.

But hey, at least you learned something..your head has blood!
 
I once got competely shit faced in Leeds with no one I knew, about 3 miles away from where I was staying. Did I remember how I got to the bar? No. Did I make it back to where I was staying? Not for 5 hours!
 
Malfunctioning beer-compass?

Luckily your beer crash-helmet worked.
 
I filmed all of it and I'm uploading the video to ebaumsworld.com :)
 
Haha, you legend :D

Next to my halls back in the first year there was a church tower that was always lit at night, that was very much my follow thing when i was frigging slorted. It worked every time at that. Lets say the Lord saw me safely home every night. hehe
 
I live in a village, but there's a pretty big city (ca 70,000 inhabitants) 10 km away where I usually go to parties. The last bus departs home at around half past two, so if you've missed it you have to wait another four hours got the morning bus to arrive.

This one time, I was so wasted I forgot about time, and then I reaslized I had just missed the last bus. So I thought, **** it, I'm not staying here for four hours, so I started to walk all the way home (which, in the state I was in, would've taken the whole night). But, to my great luck, I found an unlocked bicykle :D Its gears were broken, it had no lights, and there was no air in the tires, but nevertheless, it took me home in less than 2 hours :D
 
Taxman said:
I live in a village, but there's a pretty big city (ca 70,000 inhabitants) 10 km away where I usually go to parties. The last bus departs home at around half past two, so if you've missed it you have to wait another four hours got the morning bus to arrive.

This one time, I was so wasted I forgot about time, and then I reaslized I had just missed the last bus. So I thought, **** it, I'm not staying here for four hours, so I started to walk all the way home (which, in the state I was in, would've taken the whole night). But, to my great luck, I found an unlocked bicykle :D Its gears were broken, it had no lights, and there was no air in the tires, but nevertheless, it took me home in less than 2 hours :D
Click to expand...

You're Sweden's most wanted, you bicycle burglar, you.
 
kirovman said:
You're Sweden's most wanted, you bicycle burglar, you.
Click to expand...

Actually, its pretty common that you "borrow" each others bicycles after a night out. We had a couple of bicycles at the train station that was unlocked which you could use if you want, but only if you returned it a couple of days later. It worked great since everyone wanted to use it and nobody wanted to use a broken bike :)

Same thing where I live now. It's great.
 
They've tried that in this country before, but all the bicycles got pinched. Must be nice to live in a place where people respect public property.
 
kirovman said:
They've tried that in this country before, but all the bicycles got pinched. Must be nice to live in a place where people respect public property.
Click to expand...

Well, depends on what kind of town/city you live in. It doesn't work in larger cities. I live in a university town now so it works kinda good.
 
Ahaa, man i love hearing about drunken stories!! Keep em coming
 
One time, me and my friends had to put another drunken friend in a wheelbarrow to bring him home. He had had about half a bottle of whisky, and a bottle of wine. He puked on the sidewalk (crisps! :D) and we put him in his bed. He wanted to go to the bathroom and bathe himself, but we managed to convince him not to. We left.

The next day, he was in his bed completely naked, his clothes thrown beside his bed. The bathtub was filled with puke. He had no idea whatsoever what happened that night.
 
This one time I was at this party where I got obviously very drunk. So the gathering was a success, everyone was having fun, music (mine) was psychedelic. Anyway, my friend and I were dancing in a stupid manner and for that reason we seemed to have fallen on the ground. I twisted my ankle, it ****ing hurt and it pretty much ruined the party for me so I decided to go home à la pedestrian. The walk is about 1 hour and a half sober, and maybe the double on a bad ankle and drunk. So I gather my items in my packsack and proceeded to walk intoxicated with vodka. Each step was irksome but my drunkenness brought me hope. Half-way from home, I suddenly remembered that I forgot my music CDs at the party surrended by a lot of people willing to take them. "No way I leave my Radiohead CDs with them!" I uttered to myself.

Finally, I got home after walking double the distance on a bad ankle. I put ice on my foot and went to sleep swearing to myself to never drink again. I failed.
 
This one time i got so drunk that i left about 9/10 of the vodka. Ya rly
 
I had two friends over from the military (theres a military base 20 min talk time from my apartment) and I had 2 guest passes for the student union (or whatever you call it) so we headed out. The best thing with the student union is that the beer is half the price of what it at normal clubs so it tends to get alittle too much sometimes.

So yeah, the place was full (it's pretty big, 3 dance floors), prolly 500-800 people. Basic Element, the classic eurodance band from the 90's played as well :) One thing lead to another and we had a little too much to drink. My friend puked up most of the Jägermeister I forced him to drink but we got pretty damn drunk anyways. The tricky thing started while going home. My apartment is just... 100 meters or so from the student union so I shouldn't be that much of a problem to get home... or so we thought. After we got lost and fell down some hills, we finally got home. I live on the 12:th floor (of 18) and the ****tard to friend of mine thought it was funny to push all the buttons. So we had to stop at every floor on the way up.

Thats when we got the most awesome-est plan of them all. Sleep in the elevator and wake up when we're up! Said and done. The excessive drinking made us sleep/pass out on the way up and we woke up at 6 AM stuck in a dark elevator.

We managed to get to my apartment after that though :) It was a night to remember.

Edit: Oh yeah, I got a hug from the chick in Basic Element :D
 
I'm too young.

But your stories are very funny, and I hope I live to observe them.
 
Heh, sometime I'll have to tell you about the time when I got very drunk and ended up with 5 bodybuilders...good story.
 
Reginald said:
I had to initiate a town-wide search for my friend after he ran off when he saw his girlfriend kissing someone else.

Found him though. :E
Click to expand...

THE FILTHY WHORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:sniper:
 
Majestic XII said:
Actually, its pretty common that you "borrow" each others bicycles after a night out. We had a couple of bicycles at the train station that was unlocked which you could use if you want, but only if you returned it a couple of days later. It worked great since everyone wanted to use it and nobody wanted to use a broken bike :)

Same thing where I live now. It's great.
Click to expand...
I threw the bike I took in the river, though D:

But you kinda deserve it if you leave your bike unlocked in that town.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Krynn72
You guys, what the **** is up.
Replies
11
Views
2K
Tollbooth Willie
Tollbooth Willie
TechnoHippyChic
The Many Diversions of THC's Work Lunches
Replies
3
Views
2K
TechnoHippyChic
TechnoHippyChic
Lizardizzle
2019: The year of Half-Life SFX videos
Replies
4
Views
2K
Ennui
Ennui
bbson john
Hi everyone. I am new to this forum!
Replies
11
Views
6K
Tollbooth Willie
Tollbooth Willie
MFL
Fascinating look at the ongoing psychological evolution of flat hieirarchies.
Replies
2
Views
2K
Tollbooth Willie
Tollbooth Willie
Back
Top