Halo movie guarenteed to be crap

[CptStern]

directed by ......

Uwe Boll



sorry but if it's directed by that hack I wont watch it ..it would have to get extraordinary review for me to even consider watching it ...but this Uwe Boll, he's never made a movie that didnt suck


edit: you'd think I'd notice the Halo thread 2 threads down ..but this thread is confirmation that he will direct the Halo movie

 

[Lemonking]

in the other Halo Movie thread they say Its a joke...I hope their right If not then it will be crap



EDIT:UPS I guess your right.......



so ein scheiss aber auch man I feel ashamed that that dude is german

 

[kupocake]

We needed Uwe Boll on board to guarantee it would be crap?

 

[Glirk Dient]

The game was crap and I am expecting the movie to be crap as well. I will still go watch it because I can get into movies free. I doubt I would pay for it though.

The only way that this movie would be any good is if Joss Whedon directed it.

 

[CptStern]

We needed Uwe Boll on board to guarantee it would be crap?

in the hands of a skilled director with a good script it could have been done right ...give it to Ridley scott or bryan singer and it would probably be great


Glirk Dient: you dont know what you're talking about Halo for it's time was a great game (repetative in places but still overall good) ...oh and Joss Whedon? why not just get a director that does soap operas or reality shows ..Whedon is a hack who makes kiddie tv shows

 

[el Chi]

I can't see Ridley Scott taking a screenplay of a computer game in a hurry.

Why, if it's generally accepted that this man can't direct himself out of his own socks, does he keep getting work? and it all seems to be exclusively on game conversions... Perhaps the intention is to destroy any confidence in computer games from anyone who doesn't usually play them? If the film's shit and they haven't already played it, are they really going to bother with the game? I think not.

 

[CptStern]

I think it's because no movie studio is willing to do a big budget video game movie ..it's too much of a loss ...same reason why no one wanted to do comic book movies for years ...till someone took a chance with xmen

 

[Absinthe]

Why, if it's generally accepted that this man can't direct himself out of his own socks, does he keep getting work?

Apparently he and his business partners benefit from a loophole in the German tax laws. I'm not sure of the details exactly, but regardless of how poor his movies do, he gets a tax write-off at the end of the year.

Thankfully, the German government is looking into this hiccup and are planning to iron it out. If all goes well, no more Uwe Boll atrocities.

Besides, he can really only touch games with moderate brand recognition. They're cheaper and the high-profile titles with sane heads behind them wouldn't let Boll make a film in a million years.

 

[smwScott]

He's the absolute bottom of the barrel as far as directors go, but the game really doesn't deserve much better. It gained a lot of acclaim for being the only decent game on X-BOX, and one of the better console FPS games period, but it was never all that special. Take away the somewhat intuitive gameplay and you have a cliched B-movie science fiction plot. While Uwe Boll is a bit harsh, it doesn't deserve one of cinema's better directors.

And Ridley Scott, are you kidding me? The man has made some of the best science fiction films ... ever. Why would the guy who brought us Alien and Blade Runner revert to a damn video game movie which itself is inspired by far inferior films.

 

[Lemonking]

bungie says this is BS so its not true

 

[CptStern]

And Ridley Scott, are you kidding me? The man has made some of the best science fiction films ... ever. Why would the guy who brought us Alien and Blade Runner revert to a damn video game movie which itself is inspired by far inferior films.

because he's one of the few people who could bring legitimaicy to the industry


remember before blade runner most sci-fi movies were like star wars (infantile) ..well then again that doesnt work because after blade runner most sci-fi movies were infantile ..ok blade runner in an exception

 

[Lemonking]

ITS A LIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!!!!!1
http://nikon.bungie.org/news.html?item=14056

 

[Evo]

if that is true Lemon, then thank the Lord! Should be a decent enough action film as long as Boll doesn't do it

 

[el Chi]

And Ridley Scott, are you kidding me? The man has made some of the best science fiction films ... ever. Why would the guy who brought us Alien and Blade Runner revert to a damn video game movie which itself is inspired by far inferior films.

Well Halo, certainly. But let's not forget that there ARE games with genuinely good story lines out there that are not shamelessly pillaged from other films, that could, if worked on by the right people and treated with a degree of dignity, make the transition to cinema very well.
For example, I think a computer animated film of Grim Fandango (or at least set in that world along similar lines) could be very good indeed.

 

[staticprimer]

...oh and Joss Whedon? why not just get a director that does soap operas or reality shows ..Whedon is a hack who makes kiddie tv shows

Heathen! Firefly was one of the most quality shows to ever grace Fox. Sure I never cared for Buffy or that crap, but Firefly was excellent.

 

[Direwolf]

Yeah, I wasn't a Buffy fan, but Firefly proves that Whedon has talent out the wazoo.

 

[Absinthe]

WHEDON IS GOD. Do not challenge this.

 

[CptStern]

Heathen! Firefly was one of the most quality shows to ever grace Fox. Sure I never cared for Buffy or that crap, but Firefly was excellent.

ok to be fair I've never seen firefly ..but is it really any more innovative than Buffy in space? ..I think Star trek is probably the only real tv show to tackle science fiction in a mature manner ...most other shows (even star trek) are just action movies in space ...although I've never watched enough of doctor who to make that claim ...as I suspect it does touch on the science of science fiction

 

[Absinthe]

They're quite different.

But Buffy was a good show. Admittedly the concept is a bit hokey, but it allows for a lot of creativity. There's no way you could pull off "Once More With Feeling" in any other show, but it makes sense within the context of Buffy. It has good characters, strong writing, and it's fun.

I find that most people who don't like it are too insecure about their maturity and masculinity to really give it a chance.

 

[CptStern]

gah I just couldnt watch buffy ...far too juvenile ..I mean why is everyone cute? where are the fat vampires?

 

[Absinthe]

Well, if it gives you any impetus, Firefly is far less "cute".

 

[CptStern]

Well, if it gives you any impetus, Firefly is far less "cute".

ya the only reason I havent seen it is becasue it's not aired here on a regular basis ..at least I think so. Plus a part of me is tired of anything remotely commercial in nature ..cant even watch tv anymore because it bores me to tears ...unless they're documentaries ...I'm much better than I was a few years back when I wouldnt watch anything out of hollywood unless it had the word "independent" in it ..4-5 years of subtitled movies ..it was great but I also missed some hollywood gems like Fight club

 

[Icarusintel]

OMFG! I never figured it out until now... Uwe Boll works directly for Jack Thompson! He must, that's why he's making shitty game movies! He's trying to kill the industry! F*ck me, we certainly have a powerful enemy, and a wise one...

 

[Sulkdodds]

Icarus is right. It's a conspiracy to lower the reputation of the videogames industry.

Thing is, the Halo movie won't be all that bad. I have faith. Alex Garland is writing. He owns.

 

[Absinthe]

Yeah, Alex Garland gave me some hope for the film.

 

[kupocake]

Garland must be the single most credible director ever linked to the production of a Game to Movie conversion, right? Not that it takes much of course, but it does look a hell of a lot more promising than anything else to have ever bridged the gap (with a roll of soaking wet paper towels.)

 

[operative x]

I like Farscape a tad better than Firefly, but thats just me. Uwe Boll REALLY needs to attend a high-school level drama class.

 

[Direwolf]

Garland is actually the writer, not director.

 

[Glirk Dient]

in the hands of a skilled director with a good script it could have been done right ...give it to Ridley scott or bryan singer and it would probably be great


Glirk Dient: you dont know what you're talking about Halo for it's time was a great game (repetative in places but still overall good) ...oh and Joss Whedon? why not just get a director that does soap operas or reality shows ..Whedon is a hack who makes kiddie tv shows

Ever heard of firefly, or serenity? Besides creating a cult...sure kiddie shows.

Halo 1 was great, halo 2 ruined the series. The story in halo 1 and the book are the only good things about it.

 

[VictimOfScience]

Alex Garland is writing. He owns.

I agree that he is quite a talented author--I loved The Beach, but all that he writes isn't gold--ever read the book he did after The Beach? The Tessaract was a dreadful read, as is his latest, The Coma. 28 Days Later was very good for the most part, but like even his best work, the ending unravels and falls apart.

Still, I will give him the benefit of the doubt on this one if there's a good director attached to the project. A bad director can ruin the best script. :dozey:

 

[Direwolf]

His movies seem to stand up very well, even if all his books don't. And a lot people, myself included, love 28 Days Later from beginning to end.

 

[Absinthe]

Aye, although I think it could have benefited from a darker ending.

 

[Mechagodzilla]

the alt ending was supra dark, but I would call it inferior to the one they actually used.

 

[Absinthe]

I have it on DVD and one of the big features was supposed to be the alternate ending.

Then I watched it and...

Spoiler

Jim was replaced by a chicken.

Did I not see the right one or something?

 

[dream431ca]

HAHA!! I feel for sorry for Halo fans! The same director that directed House of the Dead!! I imagine in the Halo movie, you'll see flashes of the actual game just like in House of the dead. It's gonna be a B movie.

 

[Absinthe]

I'm quite certain Uwe Boll isn't involved. Microsoft most certainly wouldn't allow it.

 

[Sulkdodds]

Absinthe, the alternate ending Mecha is talking about is the storyboarded one, narrated by Garland and Boyle with quickly flicking drawings where

Spoiler

They never even meet the military. They hole up in this old research institute/hospital and spend a lot of time trying to get into the room where the 'cure for infection' signal is coming from.

 

[Absinthe]

Ah, then the plot (as opposed to ending) was better left as it was. The infected always seemed secondary to the theme of human nature gone ****in' twisted.

 

[Direwolf]

Spoiler

There was a third ending which was just a slight edit of the existing one, in which when they rush Jim to the hospital he dies on the table. Again, much darker.

 

[Asknoone]

His movies seem to stand up very well, even if all his books don't. And a lot people, myself included, love 28 Days Later from beginning to end.

Yeah, 28 days later was awesome.

Mmm, Halo movie was always going to be crap