How to prevent michief night vandalism

[ShadowArmy]

This has never happened before, but how would I prevent it if it does?

I'm talking about young criminals TPing houses and nearby trees and egging property. Usually its something that happens the night of or before Halloween or close. Often, this is done against somebody the criminals have a grudge against. But other times, it is just part of a series of random acts of vandalism.

Pardon the misspelling of mischief - (why is the text box and text a similar color? It is hard to see)

 

[Vegeta897]

Motion activated lights.

 

[Escaep]

A .22

 

[Vegeta897]

A .38

 

[Viperidae]

A .44

 

[CyberPitz]

Lights, camera system, and a giant dog.

 

[VirusType2]

Be the night vandal. Then you can be sure not to do your house.

EDIT: I don't always give a direct answer; I like to give strange clues. I like for you to reach the conclusion on your own and then think you thought of it. I like to make people think. Feels good man.

 

[Robbo]

Truly the only way to prevent this is for you to go outside and kill everyone you see. In fact even that might not be enough, you also need to build a flame thrower and burn down every house near yours to give you a clear line of sight. Before doing this make sure to burn down the houses of all the local police so they can't stop you. Then go to a hardware store and get supplies so you can build a bunker on the roof of your house from which you can pick off anyone sneaking around in the exclusion zone you have created. It's best to use an inferred camera to spot them.

This should keep you safe.

 

[VirusType2]

Protip: keep your doors (including any vehicles) locked on these nights, even if you don't normally.

 

[Ravioli]

Here in Italy we got something called the Carabinieri, and in my neighborhood they are crawling around every street corner. Long story short, you dont want to **** with them.

They might look silly, but god damnit if they ever feel the need to enforce the law, they enforce it good

 

[Warped]

Sprinklers...use them. there is nothing worse than getting soaked in the middle of a cold night and feeling like a douchbag with soppy clothing
if it is too cold for sprinklers, use strobe lights, ($6 at walmart or a value store) i've never met a human that was immune to the flashing lights
light flaming bags of shit at the end of your walkway, watch someone step on them and laugh (this only works on people that have IQs lower than 100)
also if you know any of the vandals, sneak up to their house, break in and rape their mother or sister. they'll come home all happy from trashing the neighborhood but they'll soon find out that you trashed their family...that'll teach em!

 

[VirusType2]

Buy out all the toilet paper at all the local stores to create a shortage, then return it after the Holidays.

 

[Ennui]

Sprinklers or just come outside, if someone's TPing your house you can always play the role of cranky old man and come out on your porch and yell at them damn kids to get off your lawn.

 

[Remus]

What's already been mentioned, or...

Stop living in a ****ing house and get an apartment, noob.

 

[taviow]

You also have the option to move here to Brazil with me, where we don't really do halloween so there's no chance of that happening whatsoever.

I CAN SET YOU UP JUST FINE HERE.

 

[No Limit]

The only sure way to prevent vandalism is to sleep commando in your front yard.

 

[VirusType2]

The only sure way to prevent vandalism is to sleep commando in your front yard.

Better yet, dress up like a scarecrow and just stand there motionless all night, until the vandals get very near. Then proceed to come alive; make them shit their pants in unison. Give them a reason to be carrying that toilet paper.

"The joke's on you" is always the best way to deal with a prankster. Perhaps.

 

[Dekstar]

Just tell them you don't want anything to do with them.

Politely...

 

[<RJMC>]

sniper rifle+window

 

[JUL3]

It's simple. Make like Donkey Kong, throw barrels at them.

 

[McGooTheWise]

Throw shit at them. Then they'll keep the toilet paper.

And if they throw eggs, throw chickens. Get it?

EDIT: Well, actually, if you throw chickens then that'll give them more eggs... Just throw more shit at them. Stupid hoolligans. That'll teach them to TP and also not to TP.

 

[Shamrock]

Better yet, dress up like a scarecrow and just stand there motionless all night, until the vandals get very near. Then proceed to come alive; make them shit their pants in unison. Give them a reason to be carrying that toilet paper.

"The joke's on you" is always the best way to deal with a prankster. Perhaps.

You beat me to it! I was going to say the best thing to do is to pretend like you're a dead body the whole night, maybe dress up like a dead samurai or gladiator or something of the sort with a sword and shield near you. Then when they come near and they look like they're going to start doing anything, you just jump up and scream and run at them with your sword and kill them dead.

Incidentally, part of this isn't me idea. Me girly's papa was telling me how one Halloween, he dressed in all black and made it look like he was a dead person with a shield and some sort of mask on. He sat on his front porch looking all sorts of dead. He had attached red LEDs to the eyes of his mask which he controlled/glowed with a switch he put in the shield. The one time when kids were walking to the door on his porch, he start glowing the eyes. The kids noticed and started walking closer and closer to him... That's when he growled. They were all.. "oh, must be motion activated." So they were almost near him when he jumped to his feet and growled at the top of his lungs at them, and they bolted away crying, begging for their life.

 

[MJ12]

^Yeah, it would be totally worth sitting out all night wide awake in the cold of October by the off chance that some vandalizes might come to your house, might not notice you, and might try to do something to you property, so that you might get to scare them.

 

[Eejit]

Sprinklers. Constantly.

 

[Remus]

Sprinklers. Constantly.

Long range assault with toilet paper, sprinklers ineffective deterant.

 

[Eejit]

Sprinklers on the sidewalk, in the street. Everywhere.

 

[Drackard]

Sprinklers that spray fire.

 

[Eejit]

Sprinklers that sprinkle fire.

Fixed.

 

[Calhoun]

A powerful hose will do. It's also fairly discouraging, if you're a high priority target, if you manage to get all the toilet paper from the first wave cleaned up by the time the second wave is there.

 

[Ennui]

Better yet, dress up like a scarecrow and just stand there motionless all night, until the vandals get very near. Then proceed to come alive; make them shit their pants in unison. Give them a reason to be carrying that toilet paper.

"The joke's on you" is always the best way to deal with a prankster. Perhaps.

Oh christ. When I was like 8 or 9 my friend had a Halloween party at his house, and all 10 or so of us went trick or treating together. Imagine a gaggle of nearly a dozen 8 year old boys dressed up as Power Rangers and other mid-90s stuff. Anyway, we went up to this one house that was really done up with a scarecrow, tons of cobwebs and orange lights, spooky noises, etc. with me in the lead of course, and some dudes pranked the living **** out of us. Once the front few kids and I were on the porch, 3 things happened: someone grabbed my friend's leg from beneath the porch, a guy pretending to be headless jumped out of the nearby bushes, and the scarecrow in the yard stood up and started running toward us and yelling.

All ten of us screamed like little girls and high-tailed it the **** out of there as fast as we could. The dudes felt bad for terrifying all the little kids so they ran after us to apologize and give us candy, but we figured they were just chasing us so we all split up and ran in different directions back to my friend's house. I would call that Halloween prank a resounding success.

Also once a several years ago I was helping answer the door for trick or treaters and I did so in my weird bone creature fang mask, which I bought for $50 at a Halloween store ages ago. I opened the door to a pint-sized black kid who couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 dressed as Batman, and he screamed and ran away just like my friends and I did a decade earlier. His mom was super irritated with me but I gave him like triple the candy I usually do to make up for it :E

 

[Higlac]

Well, I built a cannon that will launch a potato through 1/2 inch plywood, and can throw a golf ball 350 yards. Egg sabots are fun.

 

[Ennui]

Well, I built a cannon that will launch a potato through 1/2 inch plywood, and can throw a golf ball 350 yards. Egg sabots are fun.

You know what else is fun? Going to prison for assault with a deadly weapon, which definitely applies to a potato cannon.

 

[Vegeta897]

Because he was serious.

(As well as everyone else in this thread)

 

[FrostedxB]

Halloween and Mischief Night are very serious business.

 

[Krynn72]

Turn lights on in your house, derp. Nobodys going to vandalize a house with seemingly alert people inside.

 

[Bad^Hat]

Well that's hardly spooky.

(Man I'm using arms guy way too much lately.)

 

[Wanted Bob]

snip

Hah, I had something like that happen to me as a kid. There was one house on my street that had a bunch of older kids who dressed up in black and hid in the bushes along the path. They jumped out as we approached which was terrifying by itself. When I got to the front door and rang the doorbell, I felt something heavy fall right on top of me. A couple of kids had made a dummy out of pillows and goalie hockey equipment and had meant to let it fall and dangle on strings in front of me. Being a bit late, the whole thing just fell on top of me. It was damn terrifying, feeling something just fall on you out of nowhere like that.

Then as I was leaving, I had forgotten about the people in the bushes and they scared me again.