Masturbate elephant penis' at your own risk

[Mr-Fusion]

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2001320029-2007110053,00.html

He said: ?One guy I know got a black eye from being hit by an elephant?s penis.

Share your animal masturbation stories!!!
I know some of you people have some real corkers!!! Especially you..YOU on the farm!

 

[CyberPitz]

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2001320029-2007110053,00.html



Share your animal masturbation stories!!!
I know some of you people have some real corkers!!! Especially you..YOU on the farm!

I plead the fifth...

 

[BabyHeadCrab]

Haha, classic Mr. Fusion thread. I should probably post this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=csE1zeiEk3c

Old, but perfect for this soon to be locked masterpiece :E

 

[Jintor]

A can... of coke...?

 

[BabyHeadCrab]

A can... of coke...?

Do explain, haha

 

[Jintor]

Read t3h article.

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

F*ck in the WHAT?

 

[Sebastian]

I once jacked off a rabbit and paid the consequences. Boy did my toe hurt in the morning.

 

[Shift]

lol

 

[Iron Kat]

This thread is gonna get locked, I just know it!!!

 

[CyberPitz]

A dog licked my balls once. It sure was fun beating off to that.

 

[AJ Rimmer]

A dog licked my balls once. It sure was fun beating off to that.

Pics or it didn't happen.

 

[CyberPitz]

Pics or it didn't happen.

Damn, I forgot my camera in my other goatse-jeans. Sorry.

 

[JNightshade]

Where's Ikky when you need him?

 

[Ravioli]

and how deep is an elephants vagina????? 1.5 meters???? OMG

 

[CyberPitz]

and how deep is an elephants vagina????? 1.5 meters???? OMG

Just crawl up into that thing...warm place to sleep!

 

[TCfromBN]

This thread will be killed.

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

And so will you.

By elephant cock.

 

[Gorgon]

lol the funniest shit I heard in a long time.

 

[CyberPitz]

And so will you.

By elephant cock.

But you will be suffocated by Elephant Vag.

Wait...sounds like one hell of a way to die! OUT OF MY WAY WILLIE!!

 

[ríomhaire]

<_<
>_>
...bullsquid...

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

Silly Rimjob, bullsquid are alishens. They has no pen.

 

[ríomhaire]

Er...other way around.

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

?

You don't have a pen? What? Nevermind.

On a thread related note I once jacked off a mongoose.

 

[Geogaddi]

Man pounded to death by elephant penis after falling asleep inside female elephant's vagina

Ranger Gaddi, a park ranger at the wildlife reserve where the incident took place, had this to say:
"He kept screaming about necroperdobeasty something, I don't know, but that massive elepant cumtrumpet broke every bone in his body."

 

[hungryduck]

damn, thats gross.

 

[99.vikram]

No, it's genius!

 

[Sebastian]

Now all we need is T U B girl and goatse and this thread will be complete

 

[Que-Ever]

Did everyone go ****ing stupid the few hours I was gone?

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

Everyone's always been this stupid. We just don't show it when you are around.

 

[Krynn72]

lol. Elephant cockslap

 

[Darkside55]

Never try to whack off a dolphin. They're just not serious about it, always twisting their penis around your hand. I'm trying to work here, y'know?

 

[Sebastian]

How is this not closed yet. Is jesus in this thread?

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

No. Rape, lol, and trace amounts of win make up this thread. That should be enough to keep any thread alive.

And you shall refer to him as Raptor Jesus.

 

[Jerry_111]

did someone sez rape?!

 

[the_rebel_medic]

Must...not...link...to...beastiality...

 

[99.vikram]

Too late!!

 

[DEATH eVADER]

The Sun

Only a tabloid could make a white man blush

 

[The Monkey]

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ikyvQs-VJ-Q[/YOUTUBE]