Post your awesome overheard conversations

Krynn72

Krynn72

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Have you guys ever heard people say wierd things while you were in earshot and they didnt notice you?

Another thread here made me remember this one:
I was in the store the other day, really late so there was like nobody there, but in the other aisle was this younger couple who were shopping also. I was there minding my own buisness when I heard the girl ask her boyfriend:

"What would you do if I said I was pregnant?"

The guy quickly said "Kick you in the stomach" in a joking manner.

But there was this really awkward silence after that which lasted for about 20 seconds until the girl said "Oh."

I just started laughing and left.
 
I heard a girl talking to her friends about how she has anal sex, and that it was weird sitting down for a week afterwards.
 
this happened a awhile ago:

Our room is directly above our dorm's front door and our window is open because it's warm in our room, and I can hear the quiet discussions taking place below by the late night smokers.

Then I hear the door slam open and a girl yelling, "You’re a drunk!" followed by a guy who, in his drunken stupor, shouts back, "You’re a slut!" The conversation continued like this:
girl: "You asshole, you're a loser! You're so drunk you can't even get it up!"
guy: "**** you!"
girl: "**** you David! I can't believe I wasted any time with you, you can't even get off a girl!"
guy: "**** you bitch"
*door slam*
*tires squeal*
guy: "bye slut!"
*horn*
 
xcellerate said:
this happened a awhile ago:

Our room is directly above our dorm's front door and our window is open because it's warm in our room, and I can hear the quiet discussions taking place below by the late night smokers.

Then I hear the door slam open and a girl yelling, "You’re a drunk!" followed by a guy who, in his drunken stupor, shouts back, "You’re a slut!" The conversation continued like this:
girl: "You asshole, you're a loser! You're so drunk you can't even get it up!"
guy: "**** you!"
girl: "**** you David! I can't believe I wasted any time with you, you can't even get off a girl!"
guy: "**** you bitch"
*door slam*
*tires squeal*
guy: "bye slut!"
*horn*
Click to expand...
why does it seem like i've read that somewhere before.....?
 
Eh, I dunno. I've overheard plenty of menstruation conversations, but that stuff has never really bothered me. I guess I have a natural tolerance to feminine hygiene discussion :p
 
JNightshade said:
Eh, I dunno. I've overheard plenty of menstruation conversations, but that stuff has never really bothered me. I guess I have a natural tolerance to feminine hygiene discussion :p
Click to expand...

Same, actually.

On the other hand, I feel as though I've overheard hundreds of interesting conversations, but none I can remember :(
 
sea said:
Earlier today, I heard a conversation between two guys and a girl while waiting for class. They were talking about different types of lubricant and their effects on anal sex. It was pretty damn awkward, and they were talking very loudly. What I found distressing, though, was that they were completely casual about it, and they had probably only known each other for a few weeks (seeing as how we're all first-year students). Some people just don't know when to keep stuff private.
Click to expand...

Thats awesome, Im jealous. I'd of found that hilarious. If thats wrong, sue me.
 
slutty girl: "I'm leaving you"
rough guy: "huh? why?"
girl:"They have your fingerprints, they were all over the guns."
guy:"It's okay baby, I got it covered...no its okay I got it covered."
girl:"We're both going to jail for a long time"

that was probably the worst one I've overheard.

one I heard today:
guy: "so what happened next?"
girl: "her boob flew up and hit her in the eye"
 
sea said:
Earlier today, I heard a conversation between two guys and a girl while waiting for class. They were talking about different types of lubricant and their effects on anal sex. It was pretty damn awkward, and they were talking very loudly. What I found distressing, though, was that they were completely casual about it, and they had probably only known each other for a few weeks (seeing as how we're all first-year students). Some people just don't know when to keep stuff private.
Click to expand...

Aha! Stuff like that. I hear from the freshman, stuff like that all the time. It really pisses me off, those little buggery ****s. I hope they all get AIDS and then their heads explode, like that scanner.
 
I was waiting in the queue for a club with a friend of mine and it was clear the bouncer was trying to listen in our conversation, so we made up some story about a friend of ours who got raped by her dog. If he's gonna listen in we may as well give him something to be entertained by.
 
el Chi said:
I was waiting in the queue for a club with a friend of mine and it was clear the bouncer was trying to listen in our conversation, so we made up some story about a friend of ours who got raped by her dog. If he's gonna listen in we may as well give him something to be entertained by.
Click to expand...

Haha, how did he react? :D
 
*heard muffled, from a room next to the one I was in*
guy one: uuugghh!
guy two: yeah
guy one: what is it?
guy two: no idea, it was there since this morning
guy one: keep it away from me
guy two: i feel sick looking at it
guy one: is it.. contagious?

it might be worth noting the room next to the one I was in was a gents restroom. I've hoped to god since that day that they weren't talking about what I think they might have been talking about.
 
Popular Girl 1: "So what happened then?"
Stuttering Popular Girl: "Th-th-th-en her f-f-friend for raped"
Popular Girl 1: *Gasp*
Popular Girl 2: *Further gasps*
Stuttering Popular Girl: "Y-y-yeah it was pr-pr-pretty freaky when I heard about it"

*Pause*

Stuttering Popular Girl: "B-b-but sh-she was a slut anyway"

And for reason, I laughed... maybe a little too loudly.
 
Whenever I call my boss a pillock (in discussion with workmates), I turn around and he's there. At least he knows how much of a pillock he is.
 
Fat ginger Chav to skanky pregnant-looking blonde chavette:

I don't care if he's your brother I'll still ****ing knock him out

HILARIOUS :E
 
bliink said:
*heard muffled, from a room next to the one I was in*
guy one: uuugghh!
guy two: yeah
guy one: what is it?
guy two: no idea, it was there since this morning
guy one: keep it away from me
guy two: i feel sick looking at it
guy one: is it.. contagious?

it might be worth noting the room next to the one I was in was a gents restroom. I've hoped to god since that day that they weren't talking about what I think they might have been talking about.
Click to expand...

:O I was eating a muffin

/me throws unfinished muffin in wastebasket

find a better hotel :)
 
I overheard a 17 year old say this in a lesson.

'Sharks with laser beams on their heads would be the ultimate predator'

What was really funny was that he was sitting by himself
 
Shift said:
I overheard a 17 year old say this in a lesson.

'Sharks with laser beams on their heads would be the ultimate predator'

What was really funny was that he was sitting by himself
Click to expand...
He made a very valid point, though.
 
Shift said:
I overheard a 17 year old say this in a lesson.

'Sharks with laser beams on their heads would be the ultimate predator'

What was really funny was that he was sitting by himself
Click to expand...


nah...sting (death) rays pwn sharks!
 
This was a night when dalamari was over. We heard some banging against the wall coming from my moms room. We immiediately figure it out and get grossed out, but then it got worse. We hear her bf yell "ITS BLEEDING!!!".

I will be forever traumatized.
 
Apparently, anal sex feels like pooping in and out repeatedly.
 
At lunch, my friends and I sit at a table next to a whole heap of african-american women, so needless to say, we get some entertainment there. My favorite so far has been "he whipped it out wayyyy too slow"
 
ahahah these stories rule.

Theres this one kid who ALWAYS mumbles and laughs to himself...he's freakishly smart in math and science...your typical nerd.

Today this is what he was mumbling on the computer a few feet away from me:



"0.99999999999999 does not equal to 1...lousy bastards"

then a second later acts like he's holding a machine gun or something and starts making these hilarious machine gun noises...

keep in mind he's 18 yrs old and does stuff like this.
 
Painting such a picture immediately makes me jump to the conclusion this place was in fact a brothel, but I'd love to be totally wrong, for thousands of reasons, mainly not to offend the lady of the HL2.net. I'd also like to point out, i find it highly irregular for blokes to be revealing themselves to each other D: Even in the blokes toilets, men take opposite end urinals to avoid such a thing.
 
Hectic Glenn said:
Painting such a picture immediately makes me jump to the conclusion this place was in fact a brothel, but I'd love to be totally wrong, for thousands of reasons, mainly not to offend the lady of the HL2.net. I'd also like to point out, i find it highly irregular for blokes to be revealing themselves to each other D: Even in the blokes toilets, men take opposite end urinals to avoid such a thing.
Click to expand...

It was an office.

Also, they were flagrantly violating the urinal code, yes?
 
By the sounds of it + 1. Although there are still undiscussed things about the time me and Angry Lawyer went to the loo together at the pub this summer, theres an exception to every rule. ;)
 
Hectic Glenn said:
By the sounds of it + 1. Although there are still undiscussed things about the time me and Angry Lawyer went to the loo together at the pub this summer, theres an exception to every rule. ;)
Click to expand...

I remember, you were in there for a fair while.
 
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