Something hilarious happened last night

TheDude

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So I was out partying last night and something epic happened that I will never forget (Although I should have after how much beer I drank). I went to the bar last night and see this chick there that I know. Anyway we get to chatting and go to a house party and what not. But here's the good part. I walk into this house and I see the girl that I banged last weekend sitting on a chair. So she asks if she can get a ride with the people we came with. And here I was, sitting in the back seat between the girl i boned the weekend before and the girl I was trying to bone that night. And it turns out they knew each other and absolutely despised each other. But shit doesn't hit the fan thankfully and I end up taking the new one home that night. Thought I would share.
 
Liar! You spent your time alone last night watching hentai and playing with yourself and devising a way to not appear as such a loser on the interwebs.
 
So get this, right. Last night I was winding down by browsing /b/ after an hour-long masturbation session, and I thought to myself "What am I doing with my life?". So then I'm all "Man HL2net will think I'm such a loser" and come up with this awesome story to make them admire me. And it had everything, like I was having regular casual sex and going to parties and even being totally misogynystic. But shit doesn't hit the fan thankfully and now HL2net thinks I'm the coolest thing ever. Thought I would share.
 
Oh man it's been a long time since I've heard a comfortably heterosexual guy say words like "chick" and "banged".
 
Liar! You spent your time alone last night watching hentai and playing with yourself and devising a way to not appear as such a loser on the interwebs.

That would make you feel better if it was true, right?.
 
I respect your exploits, Dude. That situation could have gotten sticky to say the least, especially since alcohol was involved (in copious amounts, I'm guessing). Well done.
 
you should have tried to make them friends and kiss each other and rub each other and you know what I mean
 
Ohohoh, Doooooooood that's awesome broooooooo! lulzzzz
 
I saw some drunk bitch roll down a full flight of stairs last night. That was pretty hilarious. Especially when she sat-up after the ordeal and said (what everybody knew was coming) "I'm so drunk I didn't even feel it! Haha(insert drunk dumb girl laugh)". Then cue the throw up. All over her stupid self.
 
I saw some drunk bitch roll down a full flight of stairs last night. That was pretty hilarious. Especially when she sat-up after the ordeal and said (what everybody knew was coming) "I'm so drunk I didn't even feel it! Haha(insert drunk dumb girl laugh)". Then cue the throw up. All over her stupid self.

Now that's a story worth sharing!
 
That would make you feel better if it was true, right?.

Well if the options are non-funny hilarious situations based on being a manly ass or a lonely weirdo... Oh wait you're trying to say I'm a lonely weirdo. I prefer, incurably insane or maybe nots beings sos serius on tha intrawebs!
 
I respect your exploits, Dude. That situation could have gotten sticky to say the least, especially since alcohol was involved (in copious amounts, I'm guessing). Well done.

Who's to say it didn't get sticky. Ba-zing.
 
With JIZZ BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-ZING!
 
So I was out spying last night and something epic happened that I will never forget (Although I should have after how much beer I drank). I went to the Blu base last night and lurk around cloaked, then i see this engi there that I know. Anyway he doesn't see me so i follow him to a house party and disguise as a scout and what not. But here's the good part. I walk into this house and I see the engi's sentry that I sapped last weekend guarding the intel. So then the engi's leaving and he asks if i want a ride! And here I was, sitting in the back seat between the sentry i sapped the weekend before and the dispenser I was trying to sap that night. And it turns out they knew each other and absolutely despised each other. But shit doesn't hit the fan thankfully and I end up taking the new one home that night and sapping her. Thought I would share.
 
wat1.jpg
 
So I was out spying last night and something epic happened that I will never forget (Although I should have after how much beer I drank). I went to the Blu base last night and lurk around cloaked, then i see this engi there that I know. Anyway he doesn't see me so i follow him to a house party and disguise as a scout and what not. But here's the good part. I walk into this house and I see the engi's sentry that I sapped last weekend guarding the intel. So then the engi's leaving and he asks if i want a ride! And here I was, sitting in the back seat between the sentry i sapped the weekend before and the dispenser I was trying to sap that night. And it turns out they knew each other and absolutely despised each other. But shit doesn't hit the fan thankfully and I end up taking the new one home that night and sapping her. Thought I would share.

I love you, please marry me.
 
So I was out spying last night and something epic happened that I will never forget (Although I should have after how much beer I drank). I went to the Blu base last night and lurk around cloaked, then i see this engi there that I know. Anyway he doesn't see me so i follow him to a house party and disguise as a scout and what not. But here's the good part. I walk into this house and I see the engi's sentry that I sapped last weekend guarding the intel. So then the engi's leaving and he asks if i want a ride! And here I was, sitting in the back seat between the sentry i sapped the weekend before and the dispenser I was trying to sap that night. And it turns out they knew each other and absolutely despised each other. But shit doesn't hit the fan thankfully and I end up taking the new one home that night and sapping her. Thought I would share.

Here's an internets, sir. You deserve it.
 
oh i like had the bestest night a out and sh*t i got ligke well drunk and all dat and i got laided by twenty women and sh*t.

oh you like had to be there.

*stops fantasizing*
 
Oh i had a night. I ****ing SLEPT 8 MOTHER****ING HOURS. WHAT.......THE........FUUUUUUUU-

thought i would share.
 
HURR HURR BRO WAY TO GO ON THAT SECKS YOU HAD LOLOL. Why did you make this thread?
 
Your so freaking cool man! Any time I go out and hook up with a girl the first thing I always do is go tell all my e-friends.
 
Ew dude, bangin' chicks? Its all about bangin' dudes now.
 
so i was out spying last night and something epic happened that i will never forget (although i should have after how much beer i drank). I went to the blu base last night and lurk around cloaked, then i see this engi there that i know. Anyway he doesn't see me so i follow him to a house party and disguise as a scout and what not. But here's the good part. I walk into this house and i see the engi's sentry that i sapped last weekend guarding the intel. So then the engi's leaving and he asks if i want a ride! And here i was, sitting in the back seat between the sentry i sapped the weekend before and the dispenser i was trying to sap that night. And it turns out they knew each other and absolutely despised each other. But shit doesn't hit the fan thankfully and i end up taking the new one home that night and sapping her. Thought i would share.

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