Stupid labels

[Remus]

You've probably seen it before stupid instructions, warnings etc. on labels of all sorts of products. For instance I saw written on a label of a soft drink " open only when upright":cheers: . So what other stupid labels have you seen lately?

 

[Sparda]

On a toaster: do not use in bath. what? who makes toast in a bathroom?

 

[A True Canadian]

On Pop-Tarts they tell you to remove the package before putting them in the toaster.

In fact there's a lot of those "remove package before eating" labels out there.

EDIT: Found a site with a whole bunch of silly labels:

http://www.dumbwarnings.com/warnings.php?site=warnings

 

[Dekstar]

On bags of sillicon (The things in items that need to be kept dry), warnings that say "DO NOT EAT".

Someone obviously ate them to justify that warning.

 

[pomegranate]

EDIT: Found a site with a whole bunch of silly labels:

http://www.dumbwarnings.com/warnings.php?site=warnings

No way, I had a look on the top 25 warnings and lo and behold,

Swansea Institute of Higher Education, Wales, UK
A letter distributed to staff and students included the following message:

For safety reasons all staff and students are reminded that the taking of hot drinks out of the Refectory / fast food areas is strictly forbidden.

Several slipping accidents have already occurred as a result of liquid being spilt on the floor and the probability of someone suffering from a serious scalding accident whilst walking along busy corridors and getting into crowded lifts is high.

Your full cooperation in ensuring that you do not put yourself and others at risk is required.

I was at Swansea Institute till 2004 and not only remember that notice, but got into an argument with my lecturer about not observing it, as I'm not generally stupid enough to a) spill coffee b) not be responsible enough to clean it up if I do. Unfortunately my asshole lecturer (who no-one liked) didn't have as much faith in my judgement.

 

[Sainku]

There was a do not use on babies warning on a package of furniture wipes I used the other day.

 

[Hectic Glenn]

Tixy-Lix childs cough medicine: for ages 18 months to 5 years.

After consumption do not drive or use heavy machinery.

 

[Reginald]

On a bottle of mineral water: Suitable for vegetarians. I laughed. XD

 

[Parlez]

look on a hairdryer, it tells you not to use it in the shower or bathtub! That would defeat the whole purpose of using a hair dryer

 

[Remus]

Label on a Mattress
Warning: Do not attempt to swallow

Lolol


Edit: this one's good too:


Unknown Block of Lead (One Ton)
Do not eat or inhale, if so induce vomiting.


OK last one:


Ansell Condoms
Do not return used condoms to the manufacturer through the mail.

:O

 

[DeusExMachina]

Well let's face it. People lack common sense. The labels are justified

 

[Parlez]

Ansell Condoms Do not return used condoms to the manufacturer through the mail.

And yet the sad thing is that someone tried that :|

 

[HunterSeeker]

look on a hairdryer, it tells you not to use it in the shower or bathtub! That would defeat the whole purpose of using a hair dryer

How about somwhere you do not riks electrocuting yourself.

I read a site about these kind of things a long time ago. One of the few I remember was a label on a chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop with hands or genitals".

 

[spookymooky]

Not really the same, but:

Meatless meatballs

Ingrediants in a surprising number of thing: Nonfat milk, milkfat

 

[Reginald]

Not really the same, but:

Meatless meatballs

Ingrediants in a surprising number of thing: Nonfat milk, milkfat

Another one in a similar vain to that:

Willy Wonka Nutty Surprise Chocolate Bars.

Suitable for people with nut allergies.

 

[Raziaar]

I want to see pill bottles with the warning of, "Only take product orally"

 

[Ren.182]

They shouldn't put these labels on things... the world would be so much more clever. No more stupid people with no common sense!

Some funny stuff in hee though I LOL'd a few times.

 

[Dekstar]

Bleach with "Do not drink" on it. It's a bit obvious but I wonder how many people thought they could whiten their teeth by taking a nice big swig.

 

[Reginald]

On Christmas Lights I just found in the loft (attic :hmph "For Indoor or Outdoor Use Only"

 

[Raziaar]

On Christmas Lights I just found in the loft (attic :hmph "For Indoor or Outdoor Use Only"

Yep. No outerspace.






a label on a kitchen knife that warns: “Never try to catch a falling knife.”

a warning on a cocktail napkin. The napkin has a map of the waterways around Hilton Head, South Carolina printed on it along with this: “Caution: Not to be used for navigation."

a warning label on a bottle of dried bobcat urine made to keep rodents and other pests away from garden plants. It says: “Not for human consumption.”

warning label on a baking pan: “Ovenware will get hot when used in oven.”

a heat gun and paint remover that produces temperatures of 1,000 degrees and warns users, “Do not use this tool as a hair dryer”

 

[JNightshade]

My two favorites:

The knife that says "Keep out of children" on its box, and the chainsaw with the warning stating "do not attempt to stop blade with hands or genitals"

 

[Shippi]

.

 

[TheSomeone]

I think by nutty they mean "zany."
Like: This guy is nuts!

this thread reminds me of:

http://www.jaypinkerton.com/blog/archives/001210.html

 

[Parlez]

At the local hospital here there is a HUGE! long red chord hanging from the ceiling by the toilet. there is a label on it that says Please use this if you need assistance... ummmm not to be a wise guy or anything but why else would there be a long chord right next to the toilet??

 

[Raziaar]

At the local hospital here there is a HUGE! long red chord hanging from the ceiling by the toilet. there is a label on it that says Please use this if you need assistance... ummmm not to be a wise guy or anything but why else would there be a long chord right next to the toilet??

To drop a bucket of slime on your head?

 

[Shippi]

.

 

[Sainku]

Another one in a similar vain to that:

Willy Wonka Nutty Surprise Chocolate Bars.

Suitable for people with nut allergies.

That reminds me of a bag of peanuts that for some reason was used as a present in some game my family was playing around christmas. It warned that it may contain peanuts. The person who won it was allergic to peanuts though, so I don't guess he would have been very dissapointed if it didn't.

 

[Vegeta897]

To drop a bucket of slime on your head?

and all these panicky Japanese people ran to the toilet

That just sounds funny by itself.