Suppose that you're in the future, and meet an alien...

[15357]

Idea from other thread about abductions

Suppose that you are the captain of a spaceship (you name it) and you come avross a vessel of a type that has never been seen before, an alien vessel. This is the first contact with an alien racein the history of humanity. Suppose that your supercomputer does the translating for you, after it hijacks some transmissions and breaks down the language. What would you transmit to it?



Me, I would

Alien ship is smaller: "Attention, unidentified vessel. This is the UTM Vengeance. You are in direct violation of Terran space. Power down immediately, and prepare to be boarded. Any resistance will be seen as hostile and you will face the wrath of our AGT9 Nuclear Torpedos."

Alien ship seems equal in size: "Attention, unidentified vessel. This is the UTM Vengeance. Please identify yourself."

Alien ship is larger: "Hailing unidentified vessel. This is the UTM Vengeance of the Planet Earth. Greetings. It is an honor to meet your race. I am sure that we will be able to achieve reciprocity, or a symbiotic and mutually benefical relationship between our two races. "

Alien ships are numerous and large: *launches nuclear torpedos and AGX Gemini II missiles* *warps*

 

[Vegeta897]

That's quite a difference in how you'd greet them based on something as meaningless as the size of the first ship you encounter of theirs. Not only does size not really mean much in how powerful they are, but it is also zero indication of how powerful their race is, and thus, the rest of their fleet, which you haven't seen.

 

[MJ12]

He's Korean, what did you expect man.

 

[15357]

That's quite a difference in how you'd greet them based on something as meaningless as the size of the first ship you encounter of theirs. Not only does size not really mean much in how powerful they are, but it is also zero indication of how powerful their race is, and thus, the rest of their fleet, which you haven't seen.

Hmm. Yeah.


Use your imagination. YOU make the story, not me. It might work.


Besides, KILL THE ALIEN

He's Korean, what did you expect man.

Yeah.We're trained from birth to face insurmountable odds and just nuke the ****ers from orbit.

 

[Lucid]

If we approach them and their gun ports are opened, I would take it as a sign of hostility(even though their gun ports being opened is a sign of respect and strength) and open fire, thrusting the human race into a 2 year long war that pushes us to the edge of extinction only to have the aliens surrender at the last second.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYDM5dkpI8Y&feature=related

 

[MJ12]

I have certain reasons why I might just fly away, this fear might be due to certain things I viewed as a child.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkNyC6MQMj0

 

[AJ Rimmer]

I'd ask them if their race still worships deities and take it from there. If not, well we could be chums. If yes, well I'd be more cautious.

 

[Adabiviak]

I'd ask them if their race still worships deities and take it from there. If not, well we could be chums. If yes, well I'd be more cautious.

QFT

or

"Tread lightly if you have plans to come to earth - you'll cause a lot of local hysteria just by being there. I would like to meet you while eating some food, if you don't mind one of our oldest customs, where we can speak of this further."

 

[Remus]

"You are in direct violation of Terran space. Power down immediately, and prepare to be assimilated."

Regardless of size or number.

 

[DEATH eVADER]

Everybody loves Sex; No matter the size of the ship all you would have to do is

If they seem aggressive: "Look if I had everybody on this ship to provide sexual favours to your crew, will you let us off this time round?"

If they are peaceful: "This is the USS cuddlelove; as you can tell from our weapons systems we are a race of well endowed beings. If you after some love, call us."

 

[nurizeko]

I wouldn't say anything, I'de return to home base or whatever and inform the proper authorities.

A lowly space-ship captain, me even, is not qualified to undertake such actions on behalf of the entire human race.

I'd leave it to the government and a smattering of xenologists and all sorts of experts to determine the correct course of action.

 

[unozero]

I would ask Mother what do next.

 

[Raziaar]

Idea from other thread about abductions

Suppose that you are the captain of a spaceship (you name it) and you come avross a vessel of a type that has never been seen before, an alien vessel. This is the first contact with an alien racein the history of humanity. Suppose that your supercomputer does the translating for you, after it hijacks some transmissions and breaks down the language. What would you transmit to it?



Me, I would

Alien ship is smaller: "Attention, unidentified vessel. This is the UTM Vengeance. You are in direct violation of Terran space. Power down immediately, and prepare to be boarded. Any resistance will be seen as hostile and you will face the wrath of our AGT9 Nuclear Torpedos."

Alien ship seems equal in size: "Attention, unidentified vessel. This is the UTM Vengeance. Please identify yourself."

Alien ship is larger: "Hailing unidentified vessel. This is the UTM Vengeance of the Planet Earth. Greetings. It is an honor to meet your race. I am sure that we will be able to achieve reciprocity, or a symbiotic and mutually benefical relationship between our two races. "

Alien ships are numerous and large: *launches nuclear torpedos and AGX Gemini II missiles* *warps*

So the smaller the ship is, the more you'll bully them around thinking you can get away with it?

That doesn't seem very Terran like.

Sorry Numbers, but you would get us all killed in a big way.

 

[AJ Rimmer]

I wouldn't say anything, I'de return to home base or whatever and inform the proper authorities.

A lowly space-ship captain, me even, is not qualified to undertake such actions on behalf of the entire human race.

I'd leave it to the government and a smattering of xenologists and all sorts of experts to determine the correct course of action.

Why do people assume that in the future, the people who fly spaceships won't be exceedingly well-trained and forced to go through a rigorous screening process to weed out the morons, the aggressive and the xenophobics? There's plenty of modern astronauts I would entrust with first contact proceedings. Chances are, that if you're on a spaceship that was expected to maybe make contact with an alien species, there'd be plenty of resources on board to take care of business.

 

[Raziaar]

I would ask Mother what do next.

Walt, hit the retaliate button!

 

[Eejit]

Why do people assume that in the future, the people who fly spaceships won't be exceedingly well-trained and forced to go through a rigorous screening process to weed out the morons, the aggressive and the xenophobics?

Nuri was asked to assume that he would be such a person. A stretch too far for his imagination I suppose.

 

[Azner]

Call command and then
"Greetings, this is the HMS Sickle, please identify yourself."

See what i get for a reply and act on it.

 

[speedbump]

Any visitors would've probably unlocked the hydrogen-atom, harnessed dark-energy, and figured-out how to convert dark-matter into radio-waves, for example... then 'piggyback' radio-matter onto gamma-particles. They'd arrive via our-own warning-transmissions. -Likely escorted by swarms of microscopic bots, providing they actually care about human-life over our metals and organic plant-life to begin with.

Like H.P. Lovecraft alluded-to, it's probably not a good idea for us to advertize our presence... as we're already inhabiting an attention-grabbing blue-coloured planet on the fringe of a spiral-galaxy.

 

[Azner]

Wed conquer the whole milky way!

 

[Remus]

So the smaller the ship is, the more you'll bully them around thinking you can get away with it?

We CAN get away with it. *punches alien in the head*

That doesn't seem very Terran like.

You're kidding right?

 

[Krynn72]

I'd be like, "I gotta get outta here" and I would about-face and gtfo of there.

 

[Azner]

Or
Youd open fire with everything, then warp to home base

 

[Dodo]

I'd show them my cock via msn..


"Hi aliens, yes this is the captain"

"Yes i want to show you something first..."

"No, just click accept"

"yes accept"

....

" HAHAHAH MOTHER****ER, EAT THAT!!"

*disconnect/nuke*



-dodo

 

[Naph]

I'd mass relay the **** outta there, and regroup with larger numbers.

 

[lefty]

That's quite a difference in how you'd greet them based on something as meaningless as the size of the first ship you encounter of theirs. Not only does size not really mean much in how powerful they are, but it is also zero indication of how powerful their race is, and thus, the rest of their fleet, which you haven't seen.

At first I thought this was a good analogy for alien dongs, but then it got to the part about his other, secret dongs.

 

[Baserape>]

Suppose that your supercomputer does the translating for you, after it hijacks some transmissions and breaks down the language. What would you transmit to it?

Baserape> is coming. Big dick.

0|

 

[Remus]

What would you transmit to it?

Send over the blue slave girls.

 

[mindless_moder]

"I was wondering if you've seen a Mr. Krotch ? first name Mike"


on a serious not though i would follow the regulations of my sector which would start with identifying whether the race was hostile and then proceed to board the ship for a "first contact" sort of situation, Ultimately leading to a long mutual relationship in which trade resources and technology =).

 

[ríomhaire]

I doubt we would be able to make any relevant communications. The fact is if you met an alien ship odds are you're simply not going to be able to actually send and recieve any transmissions as your computers would use different protocalls for the signals. It'd be like opening a JPG in notepad instead of an image viewing programme. Equally the odds of your ships being able to dock on each other would be close to naught. Even then the atmosphere of their ship might not be habitable to a human nor your ship habitable to them. Quite frankly if you met an alien ship in space the best way to communicate would be waving through the window.

That said, if by some handwaving we are able to just talk through our magic supercomputers I would simply greet them and ask them to engage in conversation regarding themselves, their race and their creed.

 

[Farrowlesparrow]

I really want to play Master of Orion now. It's a shame that the 3rd game was so naff.

 

[15357]

We need more people launching all their missile at the first sight of a random flashing light.

Of course, for them, getting vaporized in space by a Terran spaceship wouldn't be the most encourageing first contact, but atl least they would respect us.

 

[AJ Rimmer]

We need more people launching all their missile at the first sight of a random flashing light.

We really don't.