Warped's Guide to the Recession

Warped

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Here are some steps you can take which will help you stretch that dollar a lot more during the hardest times. Really I'm playing Captain Obvious here, but they're tips I have picked up over the years.

1) Haircut
don't pay people for this crap!(unless your a girl) go buy yourself a hair grooming kit and learn how to do it yourself. I got some hair clippers for $13 and now I'm saving about $150-180 a year

2) Video Games
Steam Weekend deals, buy them! Used games, buy them! Old games, trade them! New games, ****ing rent them! I used to always buy every latest game but now i rent them and it saves me a ton of money. A subscription based system is usually the most practical and rewards the most. Also buying used games is not that bad, I've only encountered 1 scratched disk since I started buying used games and it was replaced quickly

3) Dating
First and foremost, lower your goddamn standards. Why should you have to dress up all nice for a hot date when you can be the hottest one on the date. If push comes to shove just turn the lights off or use a brown paper bag when things get hot. Also a Brita water filter can make even the cheapest Vodka taste like Grey Goose. I've tried it many times and it worked every time
istockphoto_471359_woman_with_paper_bag_over_her_head.jpg
GreyGoose.jpg


4) Food
Want to lose weight and feel better?? Eat a bowl of cheap ass cereal and ditch those nasty tasting chips. i did this and will not eat a bag of chips anymore. Cereal tastes better, it usually has a better price to weight ratio than chips and it has calcium in it (milk, i'm looking at you) which is something a lot of snack foods don't have. Also drinking tea in the morning can clear all colds and ailments, with a glass of orange juice. I've been doing this for years and haven't had a cold last longer than 1 day.

5) (your turn)
 
Saving $150-$180 a year on haircuts? What, do you get your hair cut every other Tuesday?
 
well if you get one per month, at $12, leaving a $3-5 tip, plus the drive it adds up. even at 1 haircut every 6-8 weeks can be a lot of wasted money, especially if all you like are buzz cuts or short hair.
 
I get a haircut every 2-3 months. I cut it really short and let it grow an inch or two. Guess that would save some money, but I do it out of pure laziness mostly.
 
I have a haircut once every 6 months or so, and even then it's about 15cm long.
 
Stabby - correct
Solaris - incorrect

Enjoy your crippling debt combined with liver disease you capitalist commie!
 
If you die of liver disease, you don't have to pay it back.
 
If you die of liver disease, you die in real life.
 
Reading all this in Morgan Freeman's voice is pretty soothing.
 
**** Danimal, you made me choke on my cereal. I am going to read everything in Morgan Freeman voice from now on.
 
Stopped eating after I lost my job, NOW I SAVE SO MUCH.

Seriously though since losing my job I can barely afford to eat.
 
The sight of Morgan Freeman choking on cereal would just somehow make sense.

Stopped eating after I lost my job, NOW I SAVE SO MUCH.

Seriously though since losing my job I can barely afford to eat.

Hustle and sling rocks on the corner, g.
 
I have a girlfriend and I haven't had my hair cut in over a year. I'm one recession-proof sasquatch.
 
Ah yes, the ten crack commandments. I live my life by these bitches.
 
I haven't had a hair cut in almost four years. That's whats up.
 
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