We're waiting for you Darkside. In the E3 center.

[MFL]

Darkside, what a relief to see you. We've been tracking your progress. I stayed behind to let you into the convention complex. You'll need me to activate the retinal scanner. I apologize, Mr. Darkside, but I couldn't risk contacting you until I was sure you'd scoured the casuals. This is the last open entrance to the convention complex, every other has been sealed off to contain the gaming masses. When we realized you actually live in San Fran, we drew straws to see who would stay behind to let you into the complex. Obviously I drew the short one. My colleagues are waiting for you at the tip of the waiting line. The Valve conference rooms are closed now, but you can sneak in on your way up. You'll have to flood the lobby anyways to get into Gabe's snack room. You aren't authorized to know about that, but I can already see you know a great deal more than any one man is supposed to. Remember to tune your transmitter to the HL2 Rumors and Speculation forum. We suspect there is an immense block on information there, created by the intense concentration of a single powerful being. You will know it when you see it. I hate to say it Mr. Darkside, but you are going to have to kill Lombardi.

Of course, you owe us nothing Mr. Darkside, but you've come this far. You know as much about these creatures as anyone. Soooo, if you're willing, my colleague is waiting at you at the main gate controls. Don't linger Darkside. I'll try to help you over the intercom.

 

[63]

That's nice.

 

[Ravioli]

Wait, Darkside will be at E3?

 

[the cow says moo]

Uhh what?

 

[VictimOfScience]

What does this mean? Is this because the PS3 has no games?

 

[Shem]

What's going on here?

 

[Sheepo]

I figured it was going to stop working well and get stupid but I actually enjoyed all of that pretty well. But I still think you're one of those new members that tries waaay too hard to be quirky and theatrical.

 

[Vegeta897]

new members

What?

 

[MFL]

Nah, I actually want him, being the only person I know of living anywhere near the convention, to infiltrate it and give us another view of the surprise.

So what if I tried to do it as a scientist.

 

[Acepilotf14]

I live closer than darkside does.
I live twenty minutes or so away.

But, it costs something ridiculous to get in and I'm sure Kojima's schutzstaffel are there.

 

[MFL]

That's why you bring your crowbar.

 

[Acepilotf14]

ff**** that

 

[kineaesth]

(psst halflife2.net is sending people to E3)

 

[MFL]

But you all would lose your special place in Valves heart if you were to say... kidnap certain lower level employees and ransom them for information. Not that I am seriously condoning such appropriate action. ... ... ... :thumbs:

Ace, that attitude's why you never get let out of stasis.

 

[Bad^Hat]

Sneak into E3 --> Kill Lombardi --> ??? --> EPISODE 3 ANNOUNCED \o/

 

[Sheepo]

What?

Having a very early join date =/= seniority

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

new member

Umm what?

 

[Sheepo]

Get out of here butty.

 

[Darkside55]

*Satcom link established*

*Broadcasting on R&S freq. 11.19.98*

This is Darkside. Must be brief. Lombardi is too strong. Repeat, LOMBARDI IS TOO STRONG. Requesting tactical nuke.

 

[Acepilotf14]

Roger that Darkside, Eagle Two here, reluctant to say we can't get a bead on the target as subject Newell is obstructing the hit zone.

Please advise further.

 

[Wanted Bob]

Roger that Darkside, Eagle Two here, reluctant to say we can't get a bead on the target as subject Newell is obstructing the hit zone.

Please advise further.

Made me think of this:

 

[VirusType2]

This is all very silly.

 

[Darkside55]

Roger that Darkside, Eagle Two here, reluctant to say we can't get a bead on the target as subject Newell is obstructing the hit zone.

Please advise further.

Copy Eagle Two; execute Gabe Newell distraction plan.

Mobilize Dunkin Donuts truck to lead him away from the center. Over.

 

[Vegeta897]

Best to hear the robot tell it Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4

What is this broken link shit and why are they wavs. Learn to compression.

 

[Acepilotf14]

Copy Eagle Two; execute Gabe Newell distraction plan.

Mobilize Dunkin Donuts truck to lead him away from the center. Over.

Mmmf.. can't acknowledge.. there are civilians dancing to Michael Jackson songs in the agreed area. We're going to have to.. oh no, I think he's OH SWEET JESUS HE GRABBED MY WING chazzzztttttt

 

[MFL]

We're running out of options. Ace, get the hell out of there, there isn't any more good you can do back there! Focus on the Lombardi exhaust ports, they might be just 3 pixels wide, but you used to bullseye headshots back home that weren't much bigger than 3 pixels.
I'll start mobilizing a resistance to clean up this shit-wracked convention. There's radioactive games developers are leaking all over the place. There's some kind of awesome dampening field.
I hope you've practiced your long-jump darkside. With your uplink set, we've been able to open up a portal to the inside. That's right, Mr. Darkside. We don't know what you'll find in him, but we know that somewhere in there is the source of Lombardi's power. We don't know what it looks like, but we suspect it's some kind of horrid amalgamation of dead gamer dreams, buckets of fried chicken, evil technology, and thousands upon thousands of folds of white fat. Not that you'll have trouble finding any of that in there. Whatever you do, ignore the cake. IT IS A LIE. If you can, steal Lombardi's USB drive while you're in there. Gabe must have eaten it by now. It's got the access codes to the Valve Co. homeworld. Good luck Darkside. We're all counting on you.

(He's a dead man.)