who is the dumbest person you know?

CptStern

CptStern

suckmonkey
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K the woman in the next cubicle is driving me nuts. Everyday she comes to work (twice a week cuz she's semi-retired) she floods me with computer questions (I'm the web designer so there I must know all there is to know about computers :upstare: ). Her questions are usually something like this:

9 am she turns on the computer ...gets a message "New virus updates available to be installed" I hear her humming and hawing .."is it a virus? I dont know if it's a virus because if it is it wouldnt tell me it was a virus, but what if it is? I dont know what to do... A virus would be bad ...why is it telling me to install a virus?" 5 minutes of talking to herself before she says:

"Stern (not my real name ...done to protect the innocent) I think I have a virus"


this happens at least once a week


I want to poke my eyes out with a dull stick :frown:


so who's the dumbest person you know ...please keep real names out
 
CptStern said:
ahhh shuzer ..I thought you'd come up with something more creative than that
Click to expand...

My creativity has run dry for the day. Sorry ;(
 
heh she's a senior with grandchildren ...it's only monday's and thursdays ...but on tuesdays and thursdays there's another older gentleman that also has computer problems ...every thursday and friday ...I dont know who's more annoying


example: the man is writing his own book ....everytime he writes a chapter or a few pages he saves ...into a new document ...he has 300 versions of the same book on his desktop which he can never find

"Stern how do I save to my desktop"


god somedays I just want to tie a computer around their necks and throw them in the nearest river



The Dark Elf said:
I'm not impressed CptStern

quit spamming
Click to expand...

quit trying to hijack this thread
 
With all due respect oh holy moderator, it's you who's spamming. This is the General Off-Topic forum. Don't deny his right to post threads just because you think it's silly.

Back on topic: Hmm, can't really think of anyone in real life. I know some REAL annoying girls, and a guy who thinks he's the ultimate debating guru. Such arrogance drives me crazy, but the stupidest people in terms of intelligence now that's a hard one to crack. I don't know much unintelligent people, but I reckon some of the people at the military.com forums have their heads a wee bit too far up in their arses!
 
hehe thanks Champ

it can also come from people around you, at school or work ...like this woman I know who backed her car out of the garage but failed to move her childs bicycle ...she stopped while she was on it ...took a look realised what she did and put it in forward and ran it over again :)
 
Thread restored :O
 
my best friend's wife.... extremely immature/unintellectual however thinks she knows everything... you could say "yeah I lost my nut in a car accident" and she would say something like "oh yeah you know statistically people lose thier nuts more in car accidents than in airplane crashes"
or something retarded.

I loathe this woman, too much to post on these boards.
 
/me thinks for a second

Munro, Badger, Chris_D, Fenric, Pendragon, Simmo,ghost somebody, Anime Guy, Zerminski, Star_Monkey, Onions

.....er J/K :p :laugh:

/me runs for his life
 
Mr. Redundant said:
my best friend's wife.... extremely immature/unintellectual however thinks she knows everything... you could say "yeah I lost my nut in a car accident" and she would say something like "oh yeah you know statistically people lose thier nuts more in car accidents than in airplane crashes"
or something retarded.

I loathe this woman, too much to post on these boards.
Click to expand...


my god that sounds like my best friends wife ...she's even worse when she gets a few drinks in her. My friend is often embarassed of her


edit: A2597 omg that's hilarious! what a complete waste of time. The best way to get rid of people like that is to tell her that you usually charge $50/hr for troubleshooting ...that should make her think twice the next time she wants to call you



btw today is tueday ...the older guy is in at work and I've spent all morning trying to explain to him why a tiff file of a resume (why was it saved as a tiff? ...and how did he save the file as a tiff from M$ word?) cant be emailed: "what do you mean you cant email 40 mb's"
 
easily top that Ctn Stern.

daughter of a family friend. shes 50 something.

I'm the only tech support she knows. Gah. 30 minutes away.

So, I get those phone call, and she says her screen is all scrunched up funny. I figure she managed to hit the scew/picushion / trapazoid settings on her moniter. thus I'm stuck driver 30 minutes to fix something as mundane as that.

ohhh, that wasn't the problem. All I had to do was hit maximize.

and that is the norm. takes 20 seconds to solve a problem, that I spent an hour round trip to do. GAH!
 
Bush

/me waits for someone to bite the flamebait
 
Hmm... I don't know any flat-out stupid people. However, my dad is one of the WORST people I know with computers. It annoys me SO much when he can't do even simple things.

Such as: When he watches horse races on the computer (i.e. he hijacks the computer from whoever was using it, and watches the races for an hour), he can sit there for five minutes wondering why there's no sound. "David, c'mere. There's no sound. What did you do to the computer?" As if I, the resident computer expert, ruined the computer on purpose :rolleyes:. "I didn't do anything. Look, the speaker light's off. The speakers aren't on." I press the button, and wait for a response from him. Nothing. I walk away in confident silence :)

And then when he needs to print something off the computer, and the printer isn't doing anything. Again, he calls me over. "How come this isn't working? Why is this taking so long?" I take a look under the desk, and see the USB plug is out, and in its place is the webcam's plug. I switch them and say "There. The printer was unplugged since someone needed the port for the webcam." Then he replies, "Why can't we just leave the printer plugged in? Nobody needs that stupid webcam anyway." So then I walk away, laughing on the inside (See? --> :laugh: )
 
flat out stupid would be my brother stabbing me in back of the knee with my sword thats hanging up on the wall to wake me up to ask a question he already knew the answer to. gave a nice slice in for it being a complete dull blade. so you can imagine how much force he used.

i kicked the shit out of him and called him a dumbass.
then he got mad and slammed a vacum into the door. at running speed screaming at the top of his lungs. that my friends is the stupidest person i know atm
 
It seems that, Ignorance is a bliss to some. If I've had it my way I'd force everyone arount me to just sit infront of their computers 5 hours/day in 2 years and just fiddle with the options and such. I'm so damn tired of someone calling me over to fix their computer. My grandfather for example. He lives 50km away from here and one day he wants me to take the buss over to him to help him with something. When I get there it turns out that all he wanted was to get his computer running. I pushed the power-button -nothing happend. I flip the powerswitch on the back. VOILA! After that he buys me a coke and sends me home with money that cover the buss. :flame:

What I hate the most tho', is TECH SUPPORTS!
My mother was about to get a new computer and she wondered what kind of software that came with the computer. So, she calls tech support and some guy answers. She asks about software, nothing but drivers comes with the comp. Then she asks how she could get hold of word and other office tools. Guess what the answer was? -"Well, I recommend that you download Kazaa, with that you can get anything you want!". When my mother told me this I was about to build my own V2-rocket and blast that company from the face of the earth.
 
I know lots of dumb people, but the most annoying of the crop is a work colleague.

Basically thanks to one 'friend' who I help out with computers everyone I know now comes to me for computer technical support, which is annoying, but usually I can cope with it. There is one guy at work however who drives me up the f'kin wall.

I get at least 50 questions from the guy every day at work ranging from "my emule isn't working, why isn't my emule working?" to "if I buy a webpage with a dot co dot uk address can only people in the UK see the webpage?"... argh.

This is turning into a 'tell us about the people who piss you off with technical support questions' thread, but the fact is, if people know you're computer literate you get it in the neck...

... sollution. act dumb.

status: UNHIRED.
 
Dumbest guy I know is a twenty-five year old "dude" who smokes about ten to twenty joints a day, watches Cartoons (especially DBZ) all day, lives with his parents in the suburbs, crashed and totalled two cars and one jeep, never got past highschool, never obtained any diploma of any kind, talks like a retarded white trash rapper, and still loves a girl who dumped him over six years ago. He's the dumbest guy I know.
 
CB | Para said:
Dumbest guy I know is a twenty-five year old "dude" who smokes about ten to twenty joints a day, watches Cartoons (especially DBZ) all day, lives with his parents in the suburbs, crashed and totalled two cars and one jeep, never got past highschool, never obtained any diploma of any kind, talks like a retarded white trash rapper, and still loves a girl who dumped him over six years ago. He's the dumbest guy I know.
Click to expand...

Jesus, now that is VERY ghey
 
CB | Para said:
Dumbest guy I know is a twenty-five year old "dude" who smokes about ten to twenty joints a day, watches Cartoons (especially DBZ) all day, lives with his parents in the suburbs, crashed and totalled two cars and one jeep, never got past highschool, never obtained any diploma of any kind, talks like a retarded white trash rapper, and still loves a girl who dumped him over six years ago. He's the dumbest guy I know.
Click to expand...
Wow :smoking:
 
I know a looot of dumb people

I dont remenber names
 
simmo said:
Jesus, now that is VERY ghey
Click to expand...

Tell me about it, worse part is I can't get rid of him, he thinks we're friends because we were in the same highschool.
 
Twice a week she comes in every day? That's a nice trick.
 
do I win the prize for knowing someone that spent 5 years in jail for shooting themselves in the leg?
 
CptStern said:
K the woman in the next cubicle is driving me nuts. Everyday she comes to work (twice a week cuz she's semi-retired)
Click to expand...
ROFL I instantly read that as semi-re****ed. It seems I wasn't too far from the truth eh? :laugh::cheers::laugh:

Edit:
http://newgrounds.com/collections/****ingmoron.html (change the **** to you know what)
Otherwise, I'd have to say that these people are quite dumb indeed. I don't know them personally though. I thank God every day for it :thumbs:
 
A2597 said:
do I win the prize for knowing someone that spent 5 years in jail for shooting themselves in the leg?
Click to expand...


oh yes you win alright ...hehe that's pretty dumb. What was the charge? Involuntary stupidity? ;)
 
ShadowFox said:
Counter-Strike players.
Click to expand...
broad generalizations are dangerous, shadowfox. :|

tbh theres some great servers out there with regular folks. or used to be anyway, stopped playing :|
 
CyberSh33p said:
broad generalizations are dangerous, shadowfox. :|
Click to expand...

Get a sense of humor. I played CS for two years a while ago.. I know there are decent people.
 
ShadowFox said:
Get a sense of humor. I played CS for two years a while ago.. I know there are decent people.
Click to expand...
Become funny.
/me snarls.

yöu bite I bite backer
 
CyberSh33p said:
Become funny.
* CyberSh33p snarls.


yöu bite I bite backer
Click to expand...
The truth hurts.. doesn't it. :)

To answer the original question more seriously, I would say anybody who has tried to recreate a Jackass stunt. I don't know anybody specifically who I would term as dumb, although I know some major assholes who we play hockey with.
 
my 'friend'(I really, really hate the guy) nick's younger brother is the world champion of stupid. They're called travis stories, and after them, you get a whole new respect for nick.

edit: why the hell did I quote?

although my point about xanga stands, go bug lIlL aZNPRii_ns3z69 or something until your brain explodes.
 
There's this really untalanted person I know of.
We went highschool together. At first I was kinda impressed at the skills he had working with FrontPage...
...although later on I realized that's the only thing he is talanted at.

I also thought that he wasn't from Sweden (I live in Sweden), because he seemed to have problems with speaking properly. (He sounded like a total dufus)
Before I knew what kind of moron he was I offered him to work with me on the school project. We were going to program our own sh'mup game in Java (yes I know, it's a unapropriate language for games, but I didn't know that back then).

Anyway, when working, he didn't do that much of work. I was mostly sitting and coding and all he did was correcting my minor mistakes. (If I typed "System.out.printlm" instead of "System.out.println" he would correct that)
Apart from that I would say I made the entire project.
(For curious people I can point out that I got an A+ (MVG))

I also heard rumors he failed six subjects. (Wouldn't surprise me)
 
5 minutes of talking to herself before she says:

"Stern (not my real name ...done to protect the innocent) I think I have a virus"
Click to expand...

Kinda late... but you shoulda replied, "Then you shouldn't of slept with all those guys!"
 
Raziaar said:
Kinda late... but you shoulda replied, "Then you shouldn't of slept with all those guys!"
Click to expand...

That's sick dude, she's a grandma!
 
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