Good at ticking people off? Come on in.

AmishSlayer

AmishSlayer

Tank
Joined
Jul 1, 2003
Messages
5,898
Reaction score
3
I'm looking for good ways to piss off my suitemate. He's just a little bitch all the time and everyone hates him. He'll report me if he knows its me...so I gotta do something anonymously. I'm doing this so maybe he'll move out and we'll get a decent suitemate next semester.

Any ideas?
 
Originally posted by The Terminator
take a dump in his shoes
Click to expand...

The thing is...his roomate is one of my good friends...and I don't wanna put him through something like that... That'd smell for days on end.
 
while he's sleeping put one of those super glue canisters up his ass and squeeze some superglue out and seal his ass shut.
 
Put a bunch of kiddy porn on his computer. Tell the RA, then he will be Bubbah the Buttplug's new roomate.
 
take him to a bar, get him drunk, then drive to new york and leave him there.
 
Hier a private assasin! Just Kidding! Just tell him how you feel and see if you can work things out like adults. Might sound cheap, but that just might be the answer. If all else fails, hold a gun up to his head and tell him to leave, and if he says anything about this then you will find him and kill him. LOL!
 
tell him hes a loser and everyone hates him.
 
Always lie to him... just about small things. Tell him you'll be somewhere and don't go... tell him not to eat because you plan on going out somewhere, then go without him... offer to take care of his laundry then dump it somewhere...

Then, if he says anything about it, just tell him he's overacting/being a whiny bitch.
 
a$$ rape him, then knock him out and when he wakes up pretend like nuthing happened :p
 
combine the music with the little lies and maybe the clear wrapping on the toilet and he'll be gone in no time.
 
Put selophane (sp definitally) on his toilet seat

it's a classic.
 
Originally posted by SLH
Cling-film over his toliet.
Click to expand...

Originally posted by nw909
Put selophane (sp definitally) on his toilet seat

it's a classic.
Click to expand...

Deja Vu!

Anyhow, the most viable thing to do would be to talk it out like suggested. Failing that, I think the plan of lying all the time would piss anyone off, sounds good to me :thumbs:
 
I thought of a good prank i wanted to pull one some one recently. Try putting itching powder on his TP. should be hilarious and he wont know whats wrong!
 
if he's his suitemate, that means they share a bathroom...so maybe the cellophane thing isn't a good idea.
 
I KNOW! Walk around nude all day. Try to get close to him and maybe rub up on him. He'll freak out and leave.
 
We blast music through the wall all the time :) When he complains then we have to stop..he's already reported one kid on our floor for waking him up in the middle of the night once.

We call him a little bitch all the time...and then he gets angry..that's pretty funny to see.

One time we were watching a baseball game...and we were like, "**** THAT GUY" "**** THE YANKEES" then I just jokingly said, "**** PAAVO" (his name) and he just flipped. He just yelled, "GET THE **** OUTTA MY ROOM" but I didn't buy it...so I just said, "Settle down you little bitch..." and he just stopped talking..

I think we should just whittle away his self esteem by making fun of him constantly..make him really feel loathed. Yeah...I think that'll do nicely...
 
OK, here's the best. Psychological warfare time.

Now, chances are no one has liked him too much for quite a long time. There are a few thigns that work great on these sorts of people.

The "What the Fu*k are you looking at" starte or the "you've a freaking moron" stare or the "who the F*ck are you" look. Just every time he tries to intereact with you, use it on him, but don't say anything at all. Don't say a word to him. It wroks best if you have more than one person do it.
 
This
might help

examples:
# Smoke jimson weed. Do whatever comes naturally.
# Switch the sheets on your beds while s/he is at class.
# Twitch a lot.
# Talk while pretending to be asleep.
# Steal a fishtank. Fill it with beer and dump sardines in it. Talk to them.
# Become a subgenius.
# Inject his/her Twinkies with a mixture of Dexatrim and MSG.
# Learn to levitate. While your roommate is looking away, float up out of your seat. When s/he turns to look, fall back down and grin.
# Speak in tongues.
# Move your roommate's personal effects around. Start subtly. Gradually work up to big things, and eventually glue everything s/he owns to the ceiling.
# Walk and talk backwards.
# Spend all your money on Jolt Cola. Drink it all. Stack the cans in the middle of your room. Number them.
# Spend all your money on Transformers. Play with them at night. If your roommate says anything, tell him/her with a straight face, "They're more than meets the eye."
# Recite entire movie scripts (e.g. "The Road Warrior," "Repo Man," "Casablanca") almost inaudibly.
# Kill roaches with a monkey wrench while playing Wagnerian Arias on a kazoo. If your roommate complains, explain that it is for your performance art class (or hit him/her with the wrench).
# Collect all your urine in a small jug.
# Chain yourself to your roommate's bed. Get him/her to bring you food.
# Get a computer. Leave it on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.
# Ask your roommate if your family can move in "just for a couple of weeks."
# Buy as many back issues of Field and Stream as you can. Pretend to masturbate while reading them.
# Fake a heart attack. When your roommate gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.
# Eat glass.
# Smoke ballpoint pens.
# Smile. All the time.
# Collect dog poop in baby food jars. Sort them according to what you think the dog ate.
# Burn all your waste paper while eyeing your roommate suspiciously.
# Hide a bunch of potato chips and Ho-Hos in the bottom of a trash can. When you get hungry, root around in the trash. Find the food, and eat it. If your roommate empties the trash before you get hungry, demand that s/he reimburse you.
# Leave a declaration of war on your roommate's desk. Include a list of grievances.
# Paste boogers on the windows in occult patterns.
# Shoot rubber bands at your roommate while his/her back is turned, and then look away quickly.
# Dye all your underwear lime green.
 
Originally posted by Letters
Always lie to him... just about small things. Tell him you'll be somewhere and don't go... tell him not to eat because you plan on going out somewhere, then go without him... offer to take care of his laundry then dump it somewhere...

Then, if he says anything about it, just tell him he's overacting/being a whiny bitch.
Click to expand...


that sounds like the best thing to do. short of actually telling him he's not wanted, let him work it out for himself. another thing to do would be to get a list of available suites/rooms that he can move into and mail it to him with a cover letter from all of you saying (politely) how you'd like him to move out.

try a role reversal. try and make out that he's the unhappy one. make it out so that you're being caring about him, asking him if he's ok and if he wants to move out. it's worked before. but if being reasonable doesn't work, then by all means just give him an ultimatum: move out or we collect your f.uckin head (Kill Bill).
 
Try to be friends with him. He's probably just very frustrated, that's all. Take him with you on trips, parties, and whatnot.

If he ever rats on you again after that, you could still really make him feel bad about him pretending to be your friend.
 
it'll talke alot of confidence, but tell him that your gay, and that you have been gay, and have had a crush on him since the first day you met. than tell everyone at school you caught him jacking off to your pictures and threatened to make up a story about how YOUR the gay one.
 
Chilli-juice in his toothpaste is always fun. Or, failing that, on his dental plate, if he has one...

Mildly electrifying something metal that he touches frequently is good also. Just a couple of nine-volt batteries planted inside the casing with attendant conductor wires taped to the case. If you do it right, he'll think it's just him building up a charge on the carpet...

Also, a great joke is to tell him, completely seriously and solemnly, that his favourite food has been found to cause cancer/reduce intelligence/carry a deadly disease...

Dying something of his pink would cause a laugh riot...

If he has a computer with windows, change the startup picture to a piece of really horrible porn...

Sign him up for every single "Name list" thing in the school/uni/whatever: The Tug-O-War, the annual skipping competition, massive and highly personal surveys, experimental surgery, <insert problem here> anonymous help groups, the Jogathon, nude art modelling, etc...

Much fun to be had.
 
Put ether on his pillow before he goes to bed and butt rape him when he passes out.
 
Put all his pants/boxers/socks in a big bowl of water and then put it in the freezer...

Many laughs to be had.
 
Originally posted by pHATE1982
Put all his pants/boxers/socks in a big bowl of water and then put it in the freezer...

Many laughs to be had.
Click to expand...

While he's in them.
 
It's just the little things you need to do. The best one is while talking to him face-on, always stare at anything on his face but his eyes... key places being his hair, chin and nose. Try to add a little bit of squinting in as well, to make it seem like there's something wrong. I love doing that.
 
Originally posted by iamironsam
While he's in them.
Click to expand...


that is indeed a cunning cunning plan... but first u'd have to convince him to put all his boxers on at once.... hmmm
 
Originally posted by pHATE1982
that is indeed a cunning cunning plan... but first u'd have to convince him to put all his boxers on at once.... hmmm
Click to expand...

I used to try and put on all the clothes I owned all at once when I was a kid. Then I walk around like a fat ass and make people laugh. Then I'd strip down and realize how streched out all my clothes were after.
 
I thought of a good prank i wanted to pull one some one recently. Try putting itching powder on his TP. should be hilarious and he wont know whats wrong!
Click to expand...

I did that once. Except it was on someone's parade trousers when just before we had an incredibly long, end of exercise parade. Was absoloutely hilarious, his legs were red raw. It defintely works :cool:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

MFL
Fascinating look at the ongoing psychological evolution of flat hieirarchies.
Replies
2
Views
2K
Tollbooth Willie
Tollbooth Willie
B
Community Interviews: Final Exchange development team
Replies
0
Views
5K
Barnz
B
B
Community Interviews: Tony Newton, co-creator of Redemption
Replies
0
Views
5K
Barnz
B
H
Thoughts: Half-Life 3 Won't Come Out?
Replies
38
Views
9K
rikt
R
DEATHMASTER
How I got the crap scared out of me at 11 in the morning
Replies
22
Views
2K
DEATHMASTER
DEATHMASTER
Back
Top