Half-Life 2 "Preview" at somethingawful

[Tiddalick]

The latest write up at somethingawful is a preview of Half-Life 2.
I am guessing that it is mostly made up, but speaks of the ending and other things in the game.

While I am sure its just made up for shock value, maybe some would not want to read it....just in case.

http://www.somethingawful.com

 

[Dr. A]

i took a quick look and it seems to have a lot of spoilers...i suggest ppl do NOT read it

 

[Muraka]

uh great dude, there are some major spoilers in the pros cons, i was just scanning through, anyway, i dont think thas real, i hope so anyway :x seems more like a spoof site or whatever

 

[czrsink]

I think you'll find that Something Awful is generally satirical, and anything posted on there should be taken with a pinch of salt.

 

[Fuzzy-_-Muff]

i very much doubt this is real. skimming through the article i notice that it contains nothing new apart from some dodgy rumours that were going around, no new screenshots and whats more what are the chances of valve giving this random a review copy when gamespot and ign etc havnt even put one up yet.

the point is somethingawful.com is a bullshit site and anything contained within it should be taken lightly

 

[urseus]

haha spoiler warning.

You guys are idiots.

Its the SA forums.

 

[azz0r]

I doubt

Spoiler

alyx dies

Why would they kill off a new character who shares the flagship - nah.

 

[Dr. A]

haha spoiler warning.

You guys are idiots.

Its the SA forums.

very constructive..thank u :|

 

[FatboyTim]

See their 'Truth Media reviews' section.

 

[urseus]

very constructive..thank u :|

Yeah lets take the SA forums seriously.

Im suprised people dont start partition threads about a bad review.

 

[Wraith]

hahahahaha

"Eli was one of the black scientists, I guess. I'm not sure which one, because all black scientists look alike to me. That's a shame, really. Even when a black man proves himself just as equal by advancing in society, he still suffers the same unnecessary stereotypes. Shame on you, Valve Software. Shame on you."

hilarious!

 

[Dagobert]

SOMETHING AWFUL IS A COMEDY SITE. THIS IS NOT A SERIOUS REVIEW. THERE ARE NO SPOILERS IN IT.

 

[Reiska]

Hehe, that is some hilarious "prereview"

 

[navyseal2004]

Right...

Spoiler

rooftop shootout with the gman

right..

 

[Raz]

Can anyone confirm that it is indeed nonsense? The spoiler I read above seems ridiculous, but not so incredibly ridiculous to not possibly be true.

 

[Dagobert]

Can anyone confirm that it is indeed nonsense?

ANYONE WHO HAS EVER READ SOMETHING AWFUL BEFORE CAN CONFRIM THIS.

 

[KagePrototype]

Columbine Soldiers! I doubt anyone should take this seriously at all.

 

[Edcrab]

People do know that SA is a spoof/satire site, right? The whole idea is to convince people that the author is insane and/or an idiot and bait entire communities into trying to flame him (subseqeuntly, they look like right idiots). Wonder who else is going to consider this genuine... the internet needs "sarcasm detected" etc. to flash up at the bottom of browser screens where the other security warnings appear.

It isn't real, do not worry yourselves. Sheesh.

 

[Socketman]

Nothing written on the front page of SA is serious.. ever... EVER

As stated before its a satirical site. Im sure lowtax is getting a good chuckle about anyone thinking it is real. Go about your normal business.

 

[Dagobert]

'Oh - I was watching Friends the other day and there was this thing about the 'Holiday Armadillo', Can anyone confirm that it is indeed nonsense? It seems ridiculous, but not so incredibly ridiculous to not possibly be true.

 

[Edcrab]

Of course it's true Dagobert. Here, let's play cups- winner takes the Holiday Armadillo.

 

[destrukt]

haha, hilarious.

 

[Raz]

Bah, I know Somethingawful. I just wanted to make sure, alright? ;(

 

[Foxtrot]

****! I read that ****ing articel just to see what it got, and there are spoilers everywhere! ****!!!

 

[Raz]

It isn't true.

 

[Edcrab]

I know, it really was *****ing inconsiderate of the guy. Coo', I just coined a new swear word...

Hmm, maybe this is going to start to confuse the easily led... only one thing for it. FORUM CULL!!

 

[staticprimer]

The Source Engine seems well qualified to handle a wide variety of tasks and while not as densely detailed as the new Doom Engine, it makes up for it by rendering intensely visible environments.

heh its funny cause its true...

 

[skumbuzzul]

"Valve has accomplished the impossible, and God himself is most certainly going to hang himself out of jealousy. After a long reign at the top, he's now only second best at world creation."

 

[MiccyNarc]

Spoiler

A rooftop fight with the G-man would be way too easy

I mean think about it, one shotgun blast and he's splattered from here to kingdom come...

 

[Lep]

Since then the HL2 source code was stolen by al-Qaeda, the alpha build leaked to Internet savages, and Gabe Newell increased his biomass to occupy more territory.

:monkee:

 

[SUPR]

I wish you guys let the outrage and flaming continue :\

Watching people get all worked up over SA articles is the whole point.

 

[Kanehdian]

The guys running somethingawful.com are geniuses. They are original, mock everything with style, and can turn anything into an overused cliche.
Check out their weekend web section. The horror. The horror! (includes snippets from the Steam forums and Gamespy's CS forum)
Check out their Counter-strike guide here:
http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=395

 

[t0v3]

The guys running somethingawful.com are geniuses. They are original, mock everything with style, and can turn anything into an overused cliche.
Check out their weekend web section. The horror. The horror! (includes snippets from the Steam forums and Gamespy's CS forum)
Check out their Counter-strike guide here:
http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=395

Thanks for that! I've never seen it before. i really did laugh out loud many times reading that, very funny stuff.

 

[CptStern]

omg you guys are so paranoid ...hehe this "review" is hilarious:

"HL2 falls pretty short when it comes to multiplayer. There is no multiplayer component, which is a shame because I looked forward to using the gravity gun to pick up another player who in turn is picking up another player with his own gravity gun. I thought that might be a great thing to do and take a hilarious screenshot of to submit to every HL website out there"

"But thanks to the positives, such as the thrill of using the gravity gun to hurl things around like an emotionally troubled child, it provides the most fun in a video game since Adventure Island for the NES, which was the first game to combine tomahawks and skateboards. A lot of people complain that Adventure Island was a boring side-scroller with little innovation, but let's not forget Adventure Island was doing outdoor tropical environments long before FarCry. Where most games groan, HL2 moans and even screams pleasure. "


they havent played the game