Have a nice chat (or not) with random people!

[L3N!N]

http://www.anicechat.net/


Basically, chatting with random people. I know, you could do this on Steam or some other place blah, blah, blah...

If you have a funny chatlog, please share.

 

[Omnomnick]

Nick: Hi
Lost connection to [Namehere]

Nick: Hi
Lost connection to [Namehere]

Nick: Hi
Lost connection to [Namehere]

Nick: Hi
gygy: hic nes kauhag naus
Nick: hail hitler!
Lost connection to gygy

More coming...

Nick: Hi
Dale: FEET OF SORROW
Lost connection to Dale

Nick: OMGZ GARRYNEWMAN
garry : Nick park, is that you
Nick: Yes.
garry : good, make me some wallace n gromit shiz please
Nick: It only actually takes about 10 minutes
Nick: Then we all go into the backroom, have a coffee and jack off to each other's wives
Nick: Then we release it about a year later
garry : the wallace and gromit christmas special took 1 and a half years to make
garry : you're an imposter
Nick: No
Nick: We just tell you that
garry : stop motion
garry : 30 frames a sec
garry : tv uses 20 frames a sec
Lost connection to garry

Nick: khi
Babe: PEDO!
Lost connection to Babe

Lol.

-Sometime later-

Nick: oh hell...
garry : im drunk
Nick: Your also garry newman!
garry : yes
Nick: ur gay
Lost connection to garry

I met this guy like 20 times after...

Bulleh: nickname ?
Bulleh:
Nick:
Nick: oo
Bulleh: :OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPP
Nick: 8======>
Nick: pen0r
Bulleh: oh that's ballz
Bulleh: and a pen0r yeah
Nick: k
Bulleh: u like mudkipz?
Nick: ur mom lieks mudkipz
Bulleh: my mom only lieks 8========>
Bulleh: no mudkipz
Nick: she liek my 8============>
Bulleh: :
Bulleh: perhaps
Bulleh: i'll ask
Nick: not
Bulleh: next time I see her
Nick: perhaps
Bulleh: yes
Bulleh: perhaps
Nick: i'll ask her now
Bulleh: not quite sure
Bulleh: yeah do that
Bulleh: call her
Nick: shes just woke up
Bulleh: oh what a coincidence
Bulleh: like she knew
Nick: funny that
Lost connection to Bulleh

On a L4D related note:

Luis: Hello Dr. Nick!
Nick: Grabbin pills.
Luis: These are my ****in pills!!
Luis: Pills here!!!
Luis: Grabbin' pills!
Nick: A witch is around here...
Luis: Grabbin' pills!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Luis: TANK!!!!
Luis: now im bored
Lost connection to Luis

EDIT: More.

Spoiler

gazzy: WAZZUP
Nick: UR MOM
Nick: THEN SHE WAS DOWN
Nick: THEN SHE WAS Up
gazzy: really
Nick: etc.
gazzy: yeah
gazzy: i know
gazzy: i saw D:
Nick: D:
Nick: u walked in on us?
Nick: shit!
gazzy:
Nick: >.>
Nick:
gazzy: Oh shit
gazzy:
gazzy: i iz fapping to you
Nick: What you saw son, that was how you treat a lady friend
gazzy: what that you like anal
Nick: ur mom likes anal
gazzy: does she!
Nick: seems so
gazzy: oh, how do you know!
Nick: >.>
Nick: I see you walked in abit too early
gazzy: pedo
Nick: Not a pedo...
Nick: Say hello to daddy...
Nick: Yes, son...
gazzy: OH SH-
Nick: Come here boy!
gazzy: Weres the shotgun
Nick: with your mom
gazzy: *BOOM*
gazzy: Headshot
Nick: no u
gazzy: orly
Nick: yarly, now go to your room
gazzy: NO
gazzy: i am to old for a room being 26
Nick: then gtfo of my house!
gazzy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! cost to much
Nick: DO EEET
Nick: and i'm not paying for u
gazzy: DO ET
Nick: nou
gazzy: say hello to facepunch
Nick: im not from facepunch
Nick: I am your father
Nick: *breaths*
gazzy: do you command the starwars galz!
Nick: I command your mother's asshole
gazzy: D:
Nick: cause 26 god damn years ago i landed my star destroyer into her warp drive and created you!
Nick: so go get your own place!
gazzy: D:
gazzy:
gazzy: PORN
Nick: ur mother's porn
gazzy: orly
Nick: gazzy'smum.net/anal
gazzy:
Nick: i star in several videos
Nick: so does fred the builder from across the street
gazzy: OH GOD THE HORROR
gazzy: really there is a builder here
Nick: and dont forget albert the plumber
gazzy: but he is called BOBSAGGET
Nick: you know fred, always coming over here before we send you to your room...
gazzy: you now adress me as garry the god of facepunch
gazzy: or a troll
Nick: i don't
Nick: i address you as my son
Nick: and your banned from that shitty facepunch until your 37
gazzy: NOES
Nick: YES
Nick: now go buy your own place
gazzy: NOES
gazzy: I GOT A FLAT AT WALLSALL
Nick: so i can knock at your door and shit in your bed
gazzy: and bodyguards
Nick: then when your girlfriend comes over i'll be all
Nick: yo dawg i herd u liek gettin dirty so i took a shit in ur bed so u can get dirty while u get dirty
gazzy: o.o
gazzy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Nick: damn straight
Nick: and your retaking University
Nick: you ballz'd it up the first time, get it ****ing right
gazzy: NO
gazzy: I AM NOT
gazzy: i get monies from garrys mod
Nick: That 'modification' of yours is a peice of shit
gazzy: Orly
gazzy: just cause you bought it
Nick: you have made pathetic money on it which you blow on your own mother's pleasure
gazzy: D:
Nick: I only bought it to give you false hope!
gazzy: i got 3 cars !
Nick: I stole the ?5 back from you the next day anyway!
gazzy: shit
Nick: I've got 6
gazzy: ****
Nick: 4 of which are bugatti's
gazzy: 6 less ?
gazzy: ****
gazzy: ****
gazzy: ****
Nick: Bitch.
Nick: nigga's see me rollin'
gazzy: **** YOUR Whore
Nick: DONT CALL YOUR MOTHER
Nick: IT ISNT POLITE
gazzy: 077832952174
gazzy: phone meh
Nick: SHE GAVE BIRTH TO YOU, AND GOD DAMN IT DIDNT LOOK EASY, I KNOW, I WAS UP HER AT THE TIME!
gazzy: o.o are you god?
Nick: Yes.
Nick: Hello Jesus.
gazzy: oh hai god
Nick: Except your mother isnt a virgin...
Nick: far from it
gazzy: MY mother is your mother
gazzy: you sick daddy
Nick: Your mother isnt that old to be my mother
Nick: she is only 46
Nick: im 45 you sick son of a bitch
gazzy: WHAT
Nick: do u think your mother is a ****ing paradox?
Nick: A HOLE IN TIME, IS THAT HOW YOU VIEW YOUR OWN MOTHER?!
Nick: Huh, mother****er?
gazzy: *no comment
Nick: Well I got news for you
gazzy: DIRE PARADOX
Nick: her vagina is large enough to be a hole in time, I shagged her and goddamn fell into the middle ages
gazzy: o
gazzy: m
gazzy: f
gazzy: g
Nick: Damn straight son.
gazzy: oh my i'm ****ing god
Nick: No your not
Nick: Your the freaking son of god
Nick: You sick mother****er
gazzy: hehe
Nick: Dont say that
Nick: you remind me of your mother first time I asked her for a shag
Nick: Except it was followed by "it'll cost ya"
gazzy: yeah i know that was me in a suit
Nick: Hardly
Nick: Cause 9 months later, you were born
Nick: God damn'd condoms
Nick: Always breaking on my ass
Nick: Or, better still, your mother's ass
gazzy: i know im a GIRL
Nick: Son, we've been through this before, you have neither
Nick: Your classified as a freak of god damn nature
gazzy: oh man
gazzy: im a HE/SHE
Nick: You can't just pick and god damn choose
Nick: No
Nick: your a ****ing Ehseh
gazzy: were is my suicide button
Nick: Up your mother's ass
Nick: Sorry, I dropped it
gazzy: OK be back soon
Nick: Sure thing son
Nick: Bring me back some potato salad
gazzy: ok
gazzy: OH GOD
gazzy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
gazzy: AH
gazzy: whats that
Nick: Thats her bladder
gazzy: OH SHIT TURDMONSTER
gazzy: FUUUUUCK
gazzy: WERE AM I NOW
gazzy: ****
gazzy: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
gazzy: NOOOOOOOOOOOO
gazzy: i am in her head
gazzy: through her ass
Nick: yeah ******s
gazzy: er, i am stuck
Nick: cut em up, cut em up
gazzy: no she is my locust mother
gazzy: ****
gazzy: LOCUSTS
Nick: Go back out her asshole
gazzy: Chainsaw gun please
gazzy: ZIRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
Nick: What is this bullshit
gazzy: AG
gazzy: BLOOD
Nick: can't even move
Nick: can't even move
gazzy: AGHHHHHHHHHHH
gazzy: BLOOOODDDDDD
gazzy: ORGANS
gazzy: ****
gazzy: CAINSAW GUN WERE YOU GO
Nick: dont treat your mother like that
gazzy: mums dead
Nick: **** this god damn bullshit
gazzy: she was a giant worm that killed carmine
gazzy: you are god
Nick: And son your god damn lucky I stole your GOW2 and already played past that part
gazzy: REALLY i compleated it NO CARMINE NO TAI
gazzy: RIP Tai RIP B.carmine
Nick: sit down asshole
gazzy: ok
gazzy: but i am no rook
gazzy: I AM A MAN
Nick: sure you are
gazzy: yeah a heshe
Nick: DAMN STRAIGHT
gazzy: NOES
gazzy: waht then how are we alive if we have nethier
Nick: ONLY U R A EHSEH
gazzy: **** YOU DAD I AM GOING TO EARTH AGAIN
Nick: FINE
gazzy: i am going to kill everyone there
Nick: better than having you in my god damn heaven
gazzy: ANd send them all to hell
Nick: Do it and I cut off your pocket money!
gazzy: Ow
gazzy: that's nasty
gazzy: WAH
gazzy: I hate you now dad
gazzy: dad......DAD.........DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD!
gazzy: fallout 3 all over again D:
gazzy: ****, marcus has gone Cole Barid come with me!
Nick: **** you son.
Nick: I'm sick of your god damn bullshit
Nick: Goodbye son
Nick: *shoots gazzy*

 

[Dog--]

woot: heeeeeeeeee
woohoo: wohoo
woohoo: shit I spelled it wrong
woohoo: woohoo
woot: hhahahaha
woot: noob
woot: >
woohoo: woot
woot: ;]
woohoo: weee as well
woohoo: w is the best
woot: guess not
woohoo: can't beat a nice ****ing w
woohoo: come on, it's like V but... two
woot: right!
woot: i got it
woohoo: like U but pointier
woot: W
woot: mg
woohoo: U and V ain't got nothing on W
woohoo: unless it's UV
woohoo: then we're all ****ed
woot: u are a wise man
woohoo: I get told that alot
woot: no wonder ur called woohoo
woohoo: did you know K and C and hte same thing?
woot: no
woot: ?
woohoo: C is actually better because it can be pronounced with a S
woohoo: making S useless as well
woot: hmm
woohoo: it's a real mind blower, you may need time to cope with it
woot: have fun with your.. letters

I tried to be weirder then a stranger - it worked.

 

[Adrien C]

Nice , thanks !

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

Does this man not know when to quit?

willie: Wallace
willie: And
willie: Gromit
garry :d: Fuk
garry :d: You
willie: Are gay
garry :d: Fag
willie: I love you

YOULOST: THE GAME
Willie: **** you
Willie: GOD DAMMIT

 

[Adrien C]

I got as well the lost the game thing.

and the server is full of Fins.

 

[Reflex]

God: lolwut.
LuLz: : |
God: OMG U TAKE OT LONG SOFO GL TALK!
God: Wait.
God: nevermind.
God: Pardon that last comment my negro.
LuLz: how did u find this chatroom
God: I'm god.
God: I know all.
God: N****.
LuLz: I'm not black.
God: :/
God: I made all life forms in the universe black..
God: howz this possible...
LuLz: U FAILZ
God: I It's ****ing Earth ain't it.
God: Earth always f*cks up.
God: Alright, cya Earth.
God: *Nuclear Launch Detected*
LuLz: ...
God: "You called in the whirlwind?"
God: "Now meet the thunder."
God: WHAT THE FU- BOOOOOOM!!!


:|

 

[Adrik_Senturu]

RayvenQ: Hey
Jerry: Hey there
RayvenQ: How are you?
Jerry: Fine fine. Just twiddling my dick
RayvenQ: That's...magical
Jerry: You wanna twiddle with me?
RayvenQ: No thanks.

No one wants to twiddle

 

[Acepilotf14]

Megatron: Excuse me
Megatron: human
Acer: Yes?
Megatron: Do you know the whereabouts of the allspark
Acer: I think it's in my pants.
Megatron: *pulls out cannons*
Megatron: Take them off
Acer: Oh balls
Megatron: Now
Acer: NO
Acer: /runs
Megatron: *blows acer to smithereens*
Megatron: What
Acer: shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit
-----------------------------------------
aMino: hello
Acer: hello
aMino: who are you
aMino: from fp
Acer: My name is Chris Hansen.
aMino: ahhhhh
----------------------------------------
Acer: ummi
immu: noni
Acer: wat
immu: mihin h?visit
Acer: TERRORIST
-------------------------------------
not that safe for work.

Spoiler

Beck: hi
Acer: Are you -the- Beck?
Beck: Yes
Beck: I AM
Acer: Really?
Acer: HOLY SHIT
Beck: Wanna have sex
Acer: I ****ING HATE YOUR MUSIC]
Acer: I'M GONNA KILL YOU
Beck: While waiting in the drive for the owner
Beck: to finish some other business he saw stallion
Beck: alone in a corral behind the corner of the barn.
Beck: He stumbled over, entranced. The black beauty’s eyes mesmerized him,
Beck: he whinnied and Tom thought he understood.
Beck: When the animal turned and raised his tail at Tom,
Beck: exposing his glistening, ripe testicles,
Beck: the most beautiful forbidden fruit he’d ever seen,
Acer: auto typer, nice.
Beck: Tom gasped. The connection was so strong,
Beck: and so sexual – there was no other way to describe it,
Beck: that Tom risked his life to get the beast.
Beck: He knew the animal would change everything about him.
Beck: He felt his breath quicken
Acer: I like where this is going
Beck: when the horse turned and their eyes met again.
Beck: They communicated on a level unknown to Tom before.
Beck: He climbed through the fence
Beck: and started toward him.
Beck: Whoa, come out of there, the owner yelled and ran over.
Beck: How much you want for this one? Tom asked the owner.
Beck: Get out of there. Tucker’s not for sale.
Beck: Why not?.
Beck: I’ve got to break him first.
Beck: You mean no one can ride him?
Beck: Last time I tried, look at this.
Beck: He showed the bit-off finger on his right hand.
Beck: I can ride him, Tom said.
Beck: Man, the owner said,
Beck: I had to build this corral two feet higher
Beck: just to keep him in, and no one’s ever been on him
Beck: longer than twenty seconds.
Beck: And you’re not a horseman.
Beck: I can ride him, and I bet he can jump this fence too.
Beck: Son, if you can ride him over this fence,
Beck: you can have him – Free.
Beck: Tom turned again toward Tucker
Beck: who came immediately to him shaking his head in anger
Beck: . The owner watched Tom unbuckle his halter
Beck: and throw it over the fence.
Beck: Tucker nuzzled Tom’s chin.
Beck: Tom ran his index finger over Tucker’s upper lip
Beck: and bent his head down to Tucker’s nostril.
Beck: They stayed nose to nose a long time,
Beck: until Tom learned how to take the jump.
Beck: Tucker knew Tom was frightened:
Beck: he ran his lips over Tom’s cheek,
Beck: then opened his mouth and took hold of Tom’s ear.
Beck: Tom felt a row of teeth on the top and bottom
Beck: and thought for a second,
Beck: like all the others watching,
Beck: that he would lose his ear.
Beck: But he did not flinch, instead he braced himself
Beck: and wondered if he was wrong.
Beck: Tucker licked his tongue deep into the soft ear
Beck: sending shivers through Tom’s backbone
Beck: right down into his groin. His cock swelled.
Beck: Was this really happening?.
Beck: Tucker pushed him sideways to mount him.
Beck: Tom walked twice around the animal
Beck: running his hand over the soft hair.
Beck: On the far side he paused,
Beck: lay his forehead against the back leg
Beck: and slipped his hand under Tucker’s tail,
Beck: fondled the huge stallion testicles and sighed,
Beck: Oh, you beauty. I want you.
Beck: Then he kicked his shoes off and jumped up.
Acer: I'm getting a hard on.
Beck: He pushed back and lay over the animal,
Beck: just his thin tee shirt between them,
Beck: pressed his nose to the horse’s neck
Beck: and breathed in his rich scent.
Beck: I want you, he whispered again.
Beck: I want you in me.
Beck: Tucker felt Tom’s cock harden against his back,
Beck: the trotted him around the corral.
Beck: I’ll be damned, the owner said to the ranch hands.
Beck: Then Tucker galloped twice around the pen
Beck: and raced toward the fence. Up and over they went,
Beck: Tom holding on for dear life, digging in and squeezing
Beck: Tucker’s sides.
Beck: He felt Tucker’s hind hooves hit the top board
Beck: and nearly fell when they landed,
Beck: but Tucker leaned and jerked him over to steady him
Beck: on his back. Jesus H. Christ, the owner said as Tucker
Beck: walked them back to the crowd.

 

[Omnomnick]

Nick: Hi
Jamey:3: Hello nick
Nick: Grabbin' Pills
Nick: so...
Jamey:3: The Federal bureau of Investigation has logged a record of this chat along with the IP of its participants due to potential violations of US law. Fed number 2355574. Your IP address has been entered into our databases and may be sent to drug prevention services. Please wait while memory reference no. 90647674 is entered into our database.
Jamey:3: IP logged, entry made
Jamey:3: Location found
Jamey:3: Hello there sir, Special agent Johnson here.
Jamey:3: Mind if I ask you a few questions?
Nick: You...may
Nick: Please, come in
Jamey:3: Ok Nick, these 'pills' you reffered to.
Jamey:3: What type of pills are they?
Nick: Pain pills
Jamey:3: Are you sure Nick?
Nick: For Louis' scratches and scars from the infected
Nick: yes
Jamey:3: The FBI is on there way, if we find they are not your sentence could be longer due to obstructing the course of justice.
Jamey:3: Is this what you want, Nick?
Nick: Louis needs his pills
Nick: So does Bill
Nick: And Francis
Nick: Don't forget Zoey
Jamey:3: Are you a drug dealer, Nick?
Nick: No
Nick: I am nobody
Nick: >.>
Nick: <.<
Nick: /vanishes, leaving only pain pills
Jamey:3: Well, this is getting us no where.
Jamey:3: See you in court!

Lol.

 

[Krynn72]

Krynn72: Hi tom
bombadil: helllooo
bombadil: how did you know my name was tom?
bombadil: too scared, leaving

Krynn72: How do you spell your name backwards?
bob: bob
bob: hi
Krynn72: WRONG
Krynn72: dod
bob: a/s/l?
bob: ;(
Krynn72: I dont have a vagina, if thats what you're asking
Krynn72: I HAVE TWO VAGINAS
bob: what?
bob: you're wierd
Krynn72: And a small penis coming from my elbow
Krynn72:
bob: is this a joke site or something?
Krynn72: Its whatever you want it to be babe

quoteschar

 

[Omnomnick]

Nick: YOU JUST LOST IT
thegame: u just lost
Nick: HA
thegame: damn

 

[SamuraiKenji]

ROW ROW: in b4 FIGHT THE POWAH
Dick: DAMN IT
Dick: You so got me on that
Dick: Hahaha

And i SWEAR i was talking to one of you guys
I was like BILLY MAYS HERE and they were like You just lost the game and left

TheGame: Inb4 you lost it
Dublya: ****

 

[Sulkdodds]

Why would I want a "nice chat" when I could have a hella dirty one?

 

[JFry]

smiles: HI DRAMA!
drama-: lol
drama-: hi
smiles: you wearing pants?
drama-: nope
drama-: you?
smiles: amen brother
smiles: **** pants
drama-: yep

I was smiles.

 

[SamuraiKenji]

HOLY SHIT the weirdest thing just happend

Dublya
: :\

Dublya: WUT THE?!
Dublya: yeah i'm bored of this

I'm the WUT THE Dublya

 

[No Limit]

I had a few beers and said **** it, might as well try it.

2211: mudkips
me: do I know you from somewher
2211: battletoads>
2211: gamestop?
me: maybe
me: do you work there too
2211: yea
2211: battletoads for the wii came out
me: sweet, this is joel. how you doing
2211: i don't work at your store? do i
me: yeah you do
2211: which 1? santa monica?
me: yeah dude, how could you not recoginze me
2211: lol
me: we've worked together forever
me: I have to get back to work
2211: sure, i don't remember you
me: see you in a bit

I dont really work at game stop.

 

[Nomad]

Lulwut?: You just lost the game

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

Dammit, I also got an ad from 4chan.

 

[Xendance]

Person I was talking to didn't know what a bellend was.

 

[SamuraiKenji]

That is the first thing i got when i tried it out was the 4chan ad

 

[Calhoun]

RM: I say become a goddamn super hero
RjHonson: I'm the goddamn Batman
RM: Like the Goddamn batman
RM: whoa

Lost connection with the game.

RjHonson: Why?
RjHonson: Because I'm the goddamn Batman.
Lost connection with Greg.

God: El Juego
God: what is that
El Juego: The Game
El Juego: And you just lost

El Juego: Usted acaba de perder El Juego
ogeuJ lE: ogeuJ lE redrep ed abaca detsU
El Juego: wat

I love this so much.

 

[Nomad]

Guard: Stop right there crimminal Scum!
monkey--: ook
Guard: Now
monkey--: OOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK
Guard: Choose one of three options
monkey--: ook?
monkey--: uuch?
Guard: Do you not get my reference?
monkey--: ookurmomuuk
Guard: THEN PAY WITH YOUR BLOOD
Guard: *staB*

I've been spamming as a monkey for about an hour now.

monkey--: ook
pedobear: you're a monkey ******

What the hell?

 

[Mellish]

Mell: God?
God: hello my child
Mell: Is that you?
God: yes
Mell: suck my dick
Mell: please
God: and I bring good news
Mell: i'm so horny
Mell: god
God: IM COMMING TO **** YOU IN THE BUTT
Mell: AHHHHH
God: see you soon david
Mell: See you soonss

WHAT: OH HAI
Mell: WHAT?
WHAT: BUTTSEX OLOLOLOL
Mell: NO

Mell: pew
Mell: pew pew
Mell: fk you
Sniper: That Mell is a SPY.
Sniper: STOP STALKING ME YOU PERVERT
Sniper: says the sniper
Sniper: Boom. Headshot.

nickname: MY ROFLCOPTER SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI
Mell: Hi.
nickname: HI
Mell: What is love?
nickname: DONT HURT ME
nickname: NO MOAR
Mell: Indeed
nickname: LET
nickname: ME
nickname: SHOW
nickname: YOU
nickname: MY
Mell: Lets meet up and have dirty sex
nickname: MY ROFLCOPTER SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI
Mell: Pleeease
Mell: I'm in love with you
nickname: IM THE CAPSLOCKCOMMANDER
nickname: DONT WORRY
Mell: Really
Mell: Show me you penis
nickname: no u!
Mell: So I can release this sexual tension
Mell: building up
Mell: oh god
Mell: it's overloading
nickname: *gunfire*
nickname: YO FUKKING NIGRO GIVE BACK MA CHICKEN
Mell: NO

AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME
AIDS: YOU ARE NOW INFECTED WITH ME

Mell: YOU'RE A SHARK?
IMASHARK: Indeed.
IMASHARK: I am a shark.
IMASHARK: How are you?
Mell: Shark sex?
IMASHARK: **** YOU SUCK MY DIIIIIIIICK
Mell: If I wasn't a human
Mell: I would be a shark
Mell: cause sharks are awesome
IMASHARK: Ew

Oh lol this is good.

 

[Nomad]

A Bear: COW
cow: moo
A Bear: i am a bear
cow: moo
A Bear: i will eat you
cow: moo
A Bear: how do you type with hooves
cow: moo. moo moo mooooo...
cow: moo moo moo MOO!
A Bear: is bacon from cows
cow: microphone to speech
cow: oh wait. um, moo.
A Bear: gimme some bacon cow
cow: I need an adult!

lulz. have. been. had.

 

[SamuraiKenji]

HAHAHAHAHAHA


Anyway

Nick: hi
God: Nicky?
God: NICKY?!
Nick: yes little nicky
God: Like
God: Nicky 0123
God: OWN
Nick: yes
God: Sweet dude hows it going?
Nick: not very well
God: Well damn...need anything?
Lost connection with Nick.

 

[Nomad]

4chan has corrupted this webchat.

 

[SamuraiKenji]

I was talking to a dude about 4chan it was pretty lol

Hitler: dont mind me just looking for jews
God: Carry on.
Hitler: seen any
God: There was one or two back down that way *points to the Eastern Path*
Hitler: ok
Hitler: thanks

 

[Emporius]

Empo: hey ross
iamross: Empo, what are you doing with your life?
iamross: Do you plan to travel?
iamross: to have kids?
Empo: OH GOD I DON'T KNOW ROSS
iamross: a wife/husband?
Empo: I FEEL SO EMPTY INSIDE
Empo: HELP ME ROSS
iamross: Have you considered life insurance?
iamross: Well, that's where i can help.
Empo: 3 EASY PAYMENTS OF 299.99?
iamross: You see, a lot of people die lonely, or poor.
Empo: I DID THAT LAST YEAR
Empo: NASTY BUSINESS DYING
iamross: So a small fee of 30,000$ a month
iamross: and you could have yourself life insurance and a toy dog.
Empo: SURE THING ROSS
Empo: I'M GOING TO NEED YOUR MAILING ADRESS AND YOUR ALARM CODE
iamross: No, you don't
iamross: All i need is your address, and i'll come straight to you
iamross: and deliver your toy dog and your free rape package.
Empo: YOU OF COURSE MEAN FREE RATE PACKAGE RIGHT ROSS?
iamross: No, i don't
iamross: Sir/Madam please remove your capslock.
iamross: AS YOU ARE NOT SHOUTING
Empo: BUT I AM SHOUTING ROSS
iamross: Good day, your free toy dog, and rape package will arrive shortly.

Indeed

gurt: hi empo
Empo: yo, gurt
Empo: hahahahahaha
Lost connection with gurt

:|

 

[2Fast4U]

Pretty cool site, just had a chat with some norwegian guy about economy and job opportunities. Will probably use it later on when bored/drunk.

 

[Sulkdodds]

I have been talking for this one guy for ages. He is pretty cool but it's possible that he's a furry and he also thinks I'm a girl.

 

[Darkside55]

You...you're NOT a girl? Our entire relationship has been a lie.

CPlanet: FUCK YOU ALDARIS
Aldaris: Amusing.
CPlanet: I DON'T NEED ANY ADDITIONAL PYLONS

 

[Sulkdodds]

I was disconnected from the guy and we never exchanged contact details, which is a real shame. I never knew, nor ever learned...his name.

 

[Nomad]

Astley: Were no strangers to loveYou know the rules and so do iA full commitments what Im thinking ofYou wouldnt get this from any other guyI just wanna tell you how Im feelingGotta make you understand* never gonna give you upNever gonna let you downNever gonna run around and desert youNever gonna make you cryNever gonna say goodbyeNever gonna tell a lie a
sandman: ****
Astley: lol
sandman: OH SHIT!
Astley: copy/paste ftw
sandman: lol
sandman: Did i just get rickrolled?
Astley: you betcha
sandman: that hurts
Astley: I know.
Astley: you wanna try?
sandman: candlejack ftw!
Astley: OH SHI-

I know, old.

 

[Dalamari]

Meh: wtf
Meh: WTF
DAvid: meh
Meh: yup
DAvid: asl?
DAvid: u wanna cyber?
Meh: ffs

Never again. (I'm Meh btw)

 

[DEATHMASTER]

Femanon: Are you there god?
Femanon: It's me
christ: behold my glory
Femanon: Femanon
Femanon: I do, oh lord.
christ: speak child
Femanon: Jesus
christ: yes?
Femanon: I wish to make a pizza parlor in your image.
Femanon: it shall be called
Femanon: The Church of Cheezus Crust.
Femanon: Plz bless it?
christ: sounds good bro, sure
Femanon: TIGHT.
Femanon: PS
Femanon: Hand over the weed.
Femanon: I know you has some
christ: aw ya got meh
christ: /me hands you the goods
Femanon: It's aight bro, we can share
christ: nah i dont do that stuff, i just hold it for people i already know i'll meet
Femanon: PS, lord
Femanon: the game.
christ: i lost it 2008 years ago
Femanon: OMG YOU ARE CHRIST

twas fun being jesus

 

[TheHamster22]

I apologize for the vulgarity of mr nabis, but I do believe it was quite the interesting conversation:

nabis: hi
I Crash: fancy a nice chat?
nabis: very much
I Crash: well fantastic! Here have a scone and some tea
nabis: o y thank you bitch
I Crash: would you like cream, jam, butter perhaps on that scone?
nabis: heres my dick
nabis: just suck and ull get gravy
I Crash: i'll use it to butter the scone then thank you
nabis: ahh good idea
I Crash: my my we arent having roast until later Mr nabis
nabis: y not now?
I Crash: gravy would quite ruin after noon snacks
nabis: wat so u suppose would happen if i shoved my dick up ur ass?
I Crash: good lord you can't have the sunday roast mid afternoon, it simply is not done Mr nabis!
I Crash: You have an interesting mother tounge Mr Nabis
I Crash: it interesting dialect and pragmatism is quite charming to the ear
nabis: well taken ms crrash
I Crash: Why thank you Mr Nabis you are quite the gentleman
I Crash: So tell me what of the South Sea Company?
I Crash: still having trouble with investors?
nabis: ahh yes these so called investors
nabis: they strapped bombs to themselves
nabis: and blew up my ships
I Crash: aye indeed "so called" they are, I hear they are just pundits for the goverments debts
I Crash: oh my they have gone much to far if that is true mr nabis
I Crash: I do recall reading that in the Norfolk Post not long ago yes
nabis: yes very much so i plan on ****ing em all up
I Crash: Quite so, those traitous dogs should be put down right away
I Crash: oh my listen to me
I Crash: getting quite carried away
I Crash: but I stand by my firm words mr nabis
nabis: do u fancy a quickie ms crash?
I Crash: oh you havent finished the scone
I Crash: do you not like rasins? and im afraid we have no sweets at the moment mr nabis
I Crash: a quickie is quite out of the question im afraid unless we can get Nelson to fetch us one
nabis: dear ms crash do not try to stray from my generouse offer
nabis: nelson can fend for himself
I Crash: I can not give what I do not have mr nabis
nabis: ms crash u hav quite a fine reproductive organ
nabis: come come
nabis: do not b shy
I Crash: Perhaps one of the children will be able to help you more with anatomy?
I Crash: i belive my daughter is studying it
I Crash: Mr Crash is a doctor afterall, and she takes a keen interest
nabis: aye ms crash ur daughter will have to do then
I Crash: Im sorry I couldnt help more
nabis: tell her to meet me in my room in five minutes
nabis: no foreplay is needed
I Crash: You'll find her in the study, be careful though she isnt expecting guests, I'd hate for you to walk in on her in the altogether now
I Crash: be sure to knock!
I Crash: oh you wish me to send her to your quarters?
I Crash: perhaps that is better yes
nabis: that would b very convenient yes pls do
I Crash: afterall you have kept all documents and journals in there
I Crash: Well with that mr nabis, I think our conversation has run its course
nabis: indeed
I Crash: you may finish your scone upstairs
I Crash: Perhaps i will see you at the dinner table?
nabis: yes il make sure to give ur daughter a good bang
nabis: at the dinner table it is
nabis: would u care to watch us or maybe join in?
I Crash: Oh how delightful, Im sure she will love to hear much of your strange dialect as much as i
nabis: ooo shucks
I Crash: Oh and my my, please do not bring such serious topics to the dinner table
nabis: on the contrary
I Crash: you shall have to have your "bangs" in private
nabis: will u b there?
I Crash: I simply would not understand
nabis: it is not all that difficult
nabis: i will just stand behind u and insert my penis into ur vagina
I Crash: Im sure it isnt for a man of your intelligence, but it is far beyond me
nabis: then i will thrust real hard
I Crash: Oh there you go with your science again mr nabis
I Crash: I really don't have the faintest idea of what you mean
nabis: until you are forced to scream
I Crash: I should hope I wont have to raise my voice, I am a lady afterall
I Crash: unless I have misconstrude your meaning?
I Crash: You do talk in rhyme sometimes
nabis: is that so?
I Crash: Quite so
I Crash: Charlie does it alot too
nabis: i guess i just dnt quite notice my fancy voice at times
I Crash: It must a male thing I believe
I Crash: of that age you might say
nabis: may i ask your good age mlady?
I Crash: You accent is quite elequent I must say
I Crash: oh my you should know mr nabis not ask a lady her age
nabis: oh my im verry sorry
nabis: please accept my apologies
I Crash: How terribly embarrassing
I Crash: But I shall forgive you mr nabis
nabis: indeed im quite heating up
I Crash: Debate is in your blood I believe
I Crash: your father was a fine Lawyer was he not?
nabis: indeed he was
I Crash: Owner of the firm on ashers lane
I Crash: a fine history
nabis: oh yes im quite proud of the bugger
nabis: and boy was his wife quite the looker
I Crash: I'm sure you are and so you should be! Oh yes the lovely Mrs Nabis
I Crash: She was rather stonking haha
I Crash: oh my there we go again
nabis: i managed to corner her in her room and i stripped her of her fine silk
I Crash: I must control myself
I Crash: Oh my yes, when the bailiffs came i remember hearing of that
I Crash: a terrible mistake
nabis: her breasts were so firm under my hands
I Crash: did you ever get that silk back?
nabis: i think i did
nabis: and she was so warm inside
I Crash: That is marvalous I would have hated to see it go to waste, and she did indeed have quite a buxom chest
I Crash: aye charitable until the last
I Crash: It was a shame she never saw that horse
I Crash: it must have been terrible
nabis: a tragedy you could say aye
I Crash: I believe she gave the bag of coins she was carrying to a boy passing by as she died
nabis: a nigga is where they hoe be
nabis: ahh yes that boy was also having an affair with her
nabis: that lady did get around
I Crash: Oh really?
I Crash: quite terrible if that is true
I Crash: Oh I do hope there wasnt scandal surrounding her death
nabis: yess more terrible was the child that was born to her
I Crash: I would hate to see such a good name besmerched
I Crash: Your step brother Mr Nabis?
I Crash: the black sheep?
nabis: the father was proven to be me
I Crash: You took him under your wing regardless?
I Crash: you are a good man
nabis: poor child was deformed
I Crash: is that him at the door?
I Crash: I wondered who it was that accompanied you
nabis: o yes that was him
I Crash: You must keep ones like that one short leash though
I Crash: No control
I Crash: It is awful
nabis: would u b interested in making a baby ith me?
I Crash: I did not know you were artistic?
I Crash: where did you hear of my clay baby modelling services?
I Crash: Was it ms Green?
I Crash: she said she wouldnt sell them until I had the full set made
nabis: ahh im srry ms crash i seem to think u have the wrong impression
I Crash: she can be quite the handfull
nabis: what i meant to say was...
I Crash: Oh?
nabis: would you like to meet at a hotel and "bang" until a baby comes out?
I Crash: A hotel? And I have already said I am not intellectual enough
nabis: a stable then
I Crash: I wouldn't be able to stimulate you at all
nabis: o dear ms crash
nabis: u r stimulating me this moment
I Crash: why would you wish to conversate outside when you have a perfectly acceptable house here, or your own estate for that matter
I Crash: Oh you are too kind mr nabis, but I know my drole conversation can not be doing much for you
I Crash: I can see in your eyes you can not wait for the return of the captain
I Crash: so you can be on your way
nabis: ms. crash it is not ur conversation it is the look of your body
nabis: if only you could just give me five minurtes?
I Crash: Body? I have long lost its vigor
I Crash: It is a terrible thing time mr nabis
I Crash: but your compliment has not fell on deaf ears
nabis: very well ms crash
I Crash: You have had nearly 20 mr nabis
nabis: its u that i need
I Crash: For what mr nabis?
I Crash: You are welcome to stay or share with us our food anytime
I Crash: you know this
nabis: to satisfy me in the bedroom
I Crash: there is little more we can do in such hard times
nabis: it is not so hard for me
I Crash: I am doing all I can here, what more can we do sitting in that dusty old thing I call a bed room?
nabis: we can do more than just sitting
nabis: u could possibly bend over
I Crash: besides a gentleman such as yourself can not escort a married lady into a bedroom
I Crash: it would be scandal
I Crash: we shall have to just stay here
nabis: here is fine with me too
I Crash: I am sorry we shall have none of it, I am to frail to bend these days mr nabis
I Crash: I struggle up the stairs
nabis: then i shall just tie you up
I Crash: As it is with me too mr nabis
I Crash: I am sorry?
I Crash: Perhaps you should leave now mr nabis
I Crash: I shall not have threats upon me
nabis: sorry that is not possible
I Crash: besides here is the captain
nabis: the captain can wait
I Crash: He shall not wait mr Nabis, Captain Fern
I Crash: please escort this wretch from my home
nabis: i pay the captain ms crash
nabis: he shall wait
I Crash: That can not be true
I Crash: Captain Fern?
nabis: very much so
I Crash: Then I shall have to do it myself
I Crash: Now leave
nabis: im srry ms cash
I Crash: The two of you
nabis: not until im done with u
nabis: please lay down
I Crash: You can not have the money Mr nabis
I Crash: the inheritance is already going to charity
nabis: it is not the money i am after
I Crash: there is nothing you can do to change that
I Crash: the estate?
I Crash: it is being sold, we are greatly in debt
nabis: it is you
I Crash: it is lost already
I Crash: me?
nabis: yes
nabis: you ms crash
I Crash: you won't get much of a ransom from a bag of bones like me mr nabis
I Crash: this is rediculous
I Crash: a farse
nabis: ahh but ms crash you have to b smarter than that
nabis: i have all the money i need
nabis: it is something else
I Crash: Oh my I believe I have just farted
I Crash: how terribly embarrassing
nabis: aye it is but itll pass
I Crash: At such a time, it has kind of ruined your approach has it not?
nabis: now please
nabis: to most gentlemen it shall hve
I Crash: Unhand me fiend
I Crash: how dare you
nabis: im very sorry but i must do this
I Crash: That is it Mr nabis
I Crash: *whips pistol from knickers and shoots mr nabis dead*

 

[Sheepo]

I remember when something like this was posted a while back. Had a 3 hour conversation with some girl in Texas about virtually everything. Wierd.

 

[Darkside55]

Hamster's chat must be preserved for all time.

 

[Sheepo]

The first guy I got. Pretty amusing. I'm Mr. Danger.

Byron: Oh man danger
MrDanger: Well
Byron: we meet again
MrDanger: hmmm
MrDanger: yes
Byron: you son of a bitch
Byron: i remember you
Byron: you ****ed my dog
MrDanger: i thought i had you last time
MrDanger: ...
MrDanger: indeed
Byron: i can't believe you
MrDanger: so he told eh?
MrDanger: just like him
Byron: and then you ate that ****ing cat
MrDanger: squeal like a little bitch
MrDanger: hmmm
MrDanger: i think you have the wrong danger
Byron: i'm sending the cops after you, jacob
MrDanger: cats taste awful
Byron: and then we'll see
Byron: THEN WE'LL SEE
MrDanger: haha
Byron: YOU SON OF A BITCH
MrDanger: you clearly have the wrong danger
Byron: YOUUUUUUU
MrDanger: I apologize for this mixup
Byron: Is this apartment 2134?
MrDanger: i really am rather embarassed
Byron: FFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU----
Byron: I'm so sorry
MrDanger: it's apartment number ****
MrDanger: GET OFF MY LAWN
Byron: you're the guy who shot my mother
MrDanger: I'M CLINT EASTWOOD
MrDanger: GET OFF MY LAWN
Byron: I'LL END YOU, CLIT EASTWOOD
Byron: I'LL defeat this clit
MrDanger: CLINT EASTWOOD SEES WHAT YOU DID THERE
Byron: NO HE DOES NOT
MrDanger: HE DOES TOO
Byron: OLD AGE HAS RAVAGED HIS EYESIGHT
Byron: HE CANNOT SEE
MrDanger: HE'S WEARING BIFOCALS
Byron: HE CANNOT HEAR
MrDanger: HE'S TYPING IN CAPS
Byron: HE CANNOT EVEN TASTE HIS BEER
MrDanger: LIES!
Byron: HE CANNOT FEEL THE TOUCH SO NEAR
MrDanger: ....
MrDanger: I sense a song...
Byron: AND SO HE KNOWS NOT WHAT TO FEAR
MrDanger: CLINT EASTWOOD LOVES MUSIC
Byron: BITCHBITCHBITCHITSTHECHORUSNOWBITCHBITCHBITCH
MrDanger: Wait
Byron: NO
Byron: stop
Byron: HAMMERTIME
MrDanger: i have to go get my rock axe
Byron: Enjoy your cock axe
Byron: cockass!
Byron: hahahahahahaha
Byron: wait, where am I?
MrDanger: exactly
Byron: no
Byron: no
Byron: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Byron: alright, enough fooling around, on your knees
MrDanger: I have a question to axe you
Byron: DO EEEEEEEETTTTTT
Byron: well
MrDanger: DO YOU WANNA ROCK?!
MrDanger: http://fc56.deviantart.com/fs30/f/2008/112/1/6/TF2_Pyro_Spray_by_xnafu.jpg
Byron: NO
Byron: forget it
MrDanger: ...
MrDanger: WELL DARN
Byron: i came to the wrong place
Byron: ****
Byron: **** ****
Byron: ****ity

 

[Sulkdodds]

Holy hamster that is amazing.

I like those conversations.