HelpValve2.net: I can't go to the dentist

[KiplingsCat]

I have a broken filling in one of my teeth. It's been giving me small twinges of pain every now and then for the past two months or so. I went for a check up, and the dentist told me he'd need to replace the filling, and it's gone more or less downhill from there.

It's kind of a combination of two fears: I don't like needles and I don't like the dentist. I've had fillings done before but usually I didn't bother with the anesthetic as they weren't that deep. The one that needs to be replaced did involve needles-don't ask me how I managed that; if I could remember, then I wouldn't be in this situation.

I've tried to have it done 3 times now, and it's just getting embarrassing. Every time, I go in feeling ready, but I just end up paralyzed with fear in the chair with my jaws clenched shut. I'm too scared to even talk to them to tell them how I'm feeling about it (I mean, they know I'm scared, but I can't really give them any more information than that).

The time before last, I asked him if he'd prescribe some valium for me, but he said he "doesn't believe in sedatives". Last time (yesterday) I bought some over-the-counter herbal stuff which seemed to be working really well; I was practically falling asleep in the waiting room, but as soon as I went into the surgery the overpowering smell of mouthwash woke me right up.

The time before last, we got really close; he had the needle in my mouth but before he could stick it in I started hyperventilating, so he said he'd leave it for a few weeks. When I went again yesterday, I'd kind of psyched myself up for having the injection in that specific part of my mouth, but then he said actually he'd try giving me a different anesthetic that went into a different part of my mouth because he thought it would be easier and maybe less painful for me. I was too scared to do anything other than agree with him. I wish I'd just had the guts to ask for the original one instead because I was ready for that.

So when he tried to do it, I wussed out at the last minute and asked him to stop (which involved moving my mouth) and he told me it was really dangerous to move because the needle could end up impaling one of us. And so then I was really scared because I didn't want to end up jerking my head away (a response which I feel it would be difficult for me to control) and getting impaled. And then he said that I should shut my eyes so I wouldn't see it coming, but if my eyes were shut, the needle going in would be a surprise to me, and I'd be almost certain to have some sort of twitchy response to it, which is exactly what he told me not to do, but I was too scared to talk to him, so I didn't tell him any of this. And he said he wouldn't do it unless I closed my eyes. So we were at an impasse. So I went home.

I really just want to get my filling done. I miss eating guilt-free sugar and not having a toothache.

 

[morgs]

I have a fear of needles too. I'd book a filling for next week if it wasn't for the injections. I usually sweat/get light headed during the injection process.

 

[Vegeta897]

You both needle little courage!

 

[Bad^Hat]

Find a dentist who will do valium?

 

[Stylo]

he said he "doesn't believe in sedatives"

Your dentist sounds like a dick.

 

[Eejit]

No chance of gas?

 

[KiplingsCat]

No chance of gas?

No they don't really do that...the dentist has to be specially qualified to do it, and it costs a lot, unless you went through the public health service, and then you'd be on a waiting list for ages and ages.

I have a fear of needles too. I'd book a filling for next week if it wasn't for the injections. I usually sweat/get light headed during the injection process.

Yeah I stop being able to breathe. And find it difficult to stay still.

I think Bad Hat might have the answer for me. Maybe I'll just ring around until I find a dentist who allows valium.

 

[tomemozok]

REAL MAN DON'T FEAR PUNY LINNTLE NEEDLES!!!!
Try this,grab a hold of something and press it like it's your worst enemy.If not try having earphones in your ears with some relaxing music,and focus on that music.
Otherwise,go to a dentist that allows use of drugs in his office...
Althou i think you just need to man up a bit

 

[BabyHeadCrab]

Get a new damn dentist. Herbal stuff? Good god, find someone with a real DDS degree. No, but seriously, find someone who knows how to properly treat your anxiety and your teeth. Don't stay with this quack.

 

[KiplingsCat]

Althou i think you just need to man up a bit

I'm a woman, so for me to "man up" would require a series of operations and hormone injections.

Also, that is a silly attitude to have towards a man or a woman. This is a genuine fear. I know men who fear needles too, and their fear is no less genuine than mine.

 

[Vegeta897]

I think you're reading a bit too much into that. Man up is just an expression.

edit: didn't see the first part of his post

 

[Omnomnick]

Only time I've ever felt pain when getting a needle was when I needed teeth removing for my brace a few years back. It only hurt because they were the ridiculously massive needles which may as well be taken directly from Gabe's knife collection.

That was only because they were needed to numb my whole face, but in general, theres nothing to worry about since the pain is almost always minimal, hardly noticeable and quickly goes away, then the relief of having it done, in your case a filling, is infinitely more rewarding. If you still can't get it done, just tell yourself that it'll be worth it, and ignore what is happening to you as much as possible.

 

[KiplingsCat]

Only time I've ever felt pain when getting a needle was when I needed teeth removing for my brace a few years back. It only hurt because they were the ridiculously massive needles which may as well be taken directly from Gabe's knife collection.

That was only because they were needed to numb my whole face, but in general, theres nothing to worry about since the pain is almost always minimal, hardly noticeable and quickly goes away, then the relief of having it done, in your case a filling, is infinitely more rewarding. If you still can't get it done, just tell yourself that it'll be worth it, and ignore what is happening to you as much as possible.

Yeah, you're absolutely right. And the rational part of my mind knows that. I really, really, really want to get this filling done. But when I'm in there, I just tense up. I find it difficult to unclench my jaws and breathe, and whenever he comes at me with the needle I find it almost impossible not to move my head or close my mouth. I'm scared that I won't be physically able to hold still when he's sticking the needle in me.

 

[morgs]

It's not the pain of needles that gets to me, it's just the thought of liquid being injected into me, It's so unnatural and ugh.

 

[Stylo]

Althou i think you just need to man up a bit

Not really a logical response to a phobia - a deep-seated and often irrational fear of something.

Obviously it can be cured in some cases but not by simply telling someone to get over it and just be brave. It's a long and arduous psychological process. Luckily I've never had a phobia of needles. I've had my blood taken loads of times due to years of medication I used to be on. I think your dentist should be more sympathetic being as this can't be the first time in his career he's had people in his work place who fear the needle.

 

[Remus]

Find a dentist who will do valium?

No chance of gas?

Personally I have a big fear/hatred of mind altering drugs, so given the choice I'd rather have an injection.

 

[KiplingsCat]

It's not the pain of needles that gets to me, it's just the thought of liquid being injected into me, It's so unnatural and ugh.

YES this. It freaks me out so, so, so much to think of it going in. I hate that cold feeling you get as it's going through your veins.

I think your dentist should be more sympathetic being as this can't be the first time in his career he's had people in his work place who fear the needle.

I'm sure he gets lots of customers who behave like me...it's just that they're mostly under ten years old In fairness, he's probably doing the best he can for me.

Edit: Except for refusing to prescribe valium.

 

[Raziaar]

Don't think of needles as something scary. Think of them as very slender hollow objects that pierce through your skin like a knife through hot butter and which squirt liquid inside of your body. Think of them as viper fangs! Or a stainless steel penis or something!

 

[Stylo]

Edit: Except for refusing to prescribe valium.

That's basically the bit I don't like. (insert-tongue-smiley-that-I-refuse-to-post-because-the-forum-emoticon-is-horrendous)

 

[KiplingsCat]

Don't think of needles as something scary. Think of them as very slender hollow objects that pierce through your skin like a knife through hot butter and which squirt liquid inside of your body. Think of them as viper fangs! Or a stainless steel penis or something!

But that's terrifying! Viper fangs are scary. And a stainless steel penis would just be weird.

Like Morgs said, part of it is the thought of liquid going into my gums. That just freaks me out completely.

 

[Adabiviak]

It took some getting used to for me, but I found a good dentist and have never 'felt' the needle, and just needed to get over the initial fear of seeing that syringe coming for my mouth. Try talking him into putting some of the novacane (or whatever he's using) on a q-tip and putting that on the injection site first. Then maybe give you a sterile glove or something dull to prod that point with so you can prove to yourself that it's numb (I take it you've never had novacane before? It's weird (but awesome) how that numbness works). DO NOT look at the needle, and while this is easier said than done, relaxing really does help. Maybe that'll get you over the hurdle?

A good dentist should insert the needle slowly, keeping a 'wall of numb' in front of the needle, and you shouldn't feel it.

 

[Remus]

A good dentist should insert the needle slowly, keeping a 'wall of numb' in front of the needle, and you shouldn't feel it.

Well I remember one time when I needed an extraction, the dentist numbed the area first and then started with the injections (3 total).
It was strange I didn't feel pain sort of, but I still felt the needle go in and rip through tissue. However it was worth it, an extraction without an injection first, is a very unpleasant experience.

 

[Raziaar]

A good dentist should insert the needle slowly, keeping a 'wall of numb' in front of the needle, and you shouldn't feel it.

Slowly... painstakingly the needle pushes against the skin. The tip creates a tiny indentation before the flesh gives and a hole is ripped open, with the shaft of the needle pressing onward, keeping its slow pace.

Needles!

 

[Stylo]

A good dentist should insert the needle slowly, keeping a 'wall of numb' in front of the needle, and you shouldn't feel it.

Mannnn, all I've ever gotten is "You'll feel a sharp scratch" >> WHAMMY! Right in the dentals.

I want this good dentist of which you speak.

 

[MuToiD_MaN]

Raziaar

 

[DEATHMASTER]

What's a filling and why do you need it?

 

[Stylo]

What's a filling and why do you need it?

Restoration of tooth structure for various reasons.

Basically, they drill out a hole in your tooth / teeth, scrape it out and then fill it.

 

[Krynn72]

Just have him break one of your fingers so you have something else to concentrate on.

 

[morgs]

My dentist almost always bumps the needle when it's inside, and I end up with a sore gum for a few weeks.

I remember the last time I was there, the injection seemed to be taking a long time. I thought I felt it go in, and then I was sure she was finished so I opened my eyes, and that big mother of a needle was right there in my face. I almost passed out. She always asks me to tell her if I'm feeling pain from the drill so she can administer more poison, but I just take it.

 

[tomemozok]

I'm a woman, so for me to "man up" would require a series of operations and hormone injections.

Also, that is a silly attitude to have towards a man or a woman. This is a genuine fear. I know men who fear needles too, and their fear is no less genuine than mine.

I had a feeling this would happen...
The man up thing is a joke,and sorry i assumed that you are a male,but i assumed wrong...
Try the music if he lets you,i do think it can help,if not,call a friend or boyfriend or someone to make you company,and to talk to,that can really put your mind elsewhere,and feel the pain and liquid when it's already injected into you.
And although pain is best counteracted with a bigger pain,i do not think you should let him break one of your fingers

 

[Stigmata]

I've got a pretty huge phobia of needles too - I almost passed out last time I had blood drawn for tests - but novacaine/whateverothersubstance injections at the dentist aren't too bad for me for some reason. It might help to sit yourself down at home for an hour or two and think about the nature of what's going on, like a sort of self-therapy for your phobia. Doing this, thinking about it in specifics and considering it a sort of adventure instead of a nightmare, helped me immensely with not flailing around in the chair while the dentist poked my gums. "It's not a scary mystery substance, it's a few drops of pain-blocking molecules that break down after a few hours into molecules that do nothing at all. It's like a liquid blanket for my nerve, don't freak out! It's a good thing!" Then when the injections are actually happening, I try to welcome the sensations in a sort of detached scientific way, telling myself over and over, "What's the worst that could happen? It's just harmless molecules, and if the needle causes any damage then so what? Gums heal quickly."

I guess that, at least for me, the hysteria comes from the fear of what I don't know or don't understand. Maybe it is for you too. I hope this helps :V!

 

[Krynn72]

"What's the worst that could happen?

Kiplings, dont open this.

Spoiler

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anesthesia_awareness

There are two states of consciousness that may be present:

• Awareness: That is, patients seem to be cognizant responding to commands but with no postoperative recall or memory of the events.
• Memorization and recall: That is, patients can recall events postoperatively, but were not necessarily conscious enough to respond to commands.

The incidence of a state with both responses in diverse degrees is also possible.[6] The drugs that induce paralysis would also prevent responding to commands.
...

Patients who experience full awareness with explicit recall may have suffered an enormous trauma. Some patients experience post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), leading to long-lasting after-effects such as nightmares, night terrors, flashbacks, insomnia, and in some cases even suicide.[12] Some cases of awareness alert the patient to intra-operative errors.

 

[morgs]

I almost passed out last time I had blood drawn for tests

Hah, When I had blood taken last year when I had glandular fever I passed out.

 

[Raziaar]

"What's the worst that could happen? It's just harmless molecules, and if the needle causes any damage then so what? Gums heal quickly."

Maybe the dentist that you have will be completely inept, and unsure where to stick the needle he'll force it between the narrow gaps of your teeth to reach the soft gums behind at an awkward angle. You know, like a toothpick but really jammed in there, forcing the teeth to give way to the needle!


Me... I haven't been to a dentist in my entire life.

 

[DEATHMASTER]

Go, damnit.

 

[KiplingsCat]

Hah, When I had blood taken last year when I had glandular fever I passed out.

I nearly passed out the time before last as well. Not my finest hour

I guess that, at least for me, the hysteria comes from the fear of what I don't know or don't understand. Maybe it is for you too. I hope this helps :V!

Yeah, sometimes I feel like if I could just hold the syringe in my hands and look at it and know what it is and exactly how it works, I might feel better. But there's always a chance that it could make me more frightened.

 

[Edeslash]

I used to be scared to death of needles but nowadays I kinda enjoy having small needles poked at me, like anesthesia at the dentist's.

I have no idea what happened. I think I had extremely painful memories of some vaccination a very long time ago, and when I took my swine flu shot I barely felt it. Might be related to that.

 

[KiplingsCat]

I used to be scared to death of needles but nowadays I kinda enjoy having small needles poked at me, like anesthesia at the dentist's.

What do you like about it? Maybe if I knew some of the advantages, I could bear them in mind when I'm getting it done myself.

 

[Stylo]

What do you like about it? Maybe if I knew some of the advantages, I could bear them in mind when I'm getting it done myself.

For the tiny scratch of the little needle, you won't be able to feel the full-on pain of the moderately sized drill hacking out your tooth enamel, the hacked out gap being filled up and then a metal tool being jammed upwards into it just to make sure it's secure.

Advantage!

 

[KiplingsCat]

For the tiny scratch of the little needle, you won't be able to feel the full-on pain of the moderately sized drill hacking out your tooth enamel, the hacked out gap being filled up and then a metal tool being jammed upwards into it just to make sure it's secure.

Advantage!

I've had fillings without anesthesia before. They're usually fine. It's just that this one is very deep.