Homosexual families

[Thread]

Let me start by saying that I respect people whether they're straight or not.

However a discussion emerged in class about how the Church (not sure if Christian or something) was not against homosexuals themselves, but against them raising children. In other words, a family in which both parents are homosexually oriented, is wrong.

I would've said that the Church and everything it represents and wants to make you believe comes down to personal choice, and it doesn't have the right to attack anyone (nor an individual can attack another), regardless of sexual orientation and whatnot.

But then I thought about the children they would raise. It's not that I have a problem that homosexuals multiply or anything of that sort, so I suppose my question is, what if the child, instead of assuming his or her natural sexual orientation, is wrongly made to believe he or she is a homosexual by their parents' influence? What if inside, he/she really feels wrong by becoming what their parents are or vice versa; making them psychologically confused? Is this the same old thing about homosexuals being 'born, not made' (i am terribly uninformed on how homosexuals feel on this aspect)?

What I think is, that once the children raised by homosexual familes are fully educated they will make a decision themselves, but then again, most part of things come from where you're from, and how you were educated I.E. family.

 

[Solaris]

There's no evidence to suggest that it damages the children.

 

[Ome_Vince]

I think generally speaking Christendom-Jewdism and Islam have problems/issues with homosexuality.
Personally I couldn't give a crap, and I don't think it has any influence on a child. It might be the child has a problem in high-school being teased at having gay parents but in the end, that'll probably toughen him/her up

 

[15357]

It might be the child has a problem in high-school being teased at having gay parents but in the end, that'll probably toughen him/her up

Thats rather horrible. This is the only reason that I have against homosexual couples adopting children.

 

[Thread]

There's no evidence to suggest that it damages the children.

And you base this on research or opinion?

Thats rather horrible. This is the only reason that I have against homosexual couples adopting children.

with the world changing rapidly we may have more homosexual families soon. who knows? :bounce:

 

[CrazyHarij]

the argument that it damages the children is only fair if straight parents decide to raise their kids to bully the children with gay parents

 

[Walter]

I don't know if it's a crime to dislike homosexuals in a modern world, but i do. One of the main reasons is because some just become homosexuals because of a "little desire of that" in them, they have nothing wrong in their psyhics to be such. That's the most worst kind of a homosexual, really.
But otherwise, why does a man becomes homosexual? If he feels like he's attracted to men, then make a surgery and become a woman, don't try being a man and a woman in one, that's not right.
And from a religious view, the church is not forcing anyone to be straight, it's not a government power or something like that to do so. The church is a school, which interprets to you the word of God, Who clearly says that it is a sin.

 

[Qonfused]

The argument is that raising a kid in sin causes them to do sin themselves. However, if you look at it non-biblically, raising gay children is fine.

 

[The Monkey]

A child needs a male and a female role model. It's hard for a gay couple to provide that. Although studies show that single-parent house holds are even worse at providing role models than gay households, so it isn't an easy issue.

 

[Thread]

The argument is that raising a kid in sin causes them to do sin themselves. However, if you look at it non-biblically, raising gay children is fine.

not really. i couldn't care less about religion for this matter.
(if you were referring to me)

the argument that it damages the children is only fair if straight parents decide to raise their kids to bully the children with gay parents

exactly, and i believe it is not fair if the gay parents bully their children into forcing a fixed sexual orientation in the same way as you describe to possibly either bully non-gay children or to just be gay, like their parents.

 

[Walter]

A child needs a male and a female role model. It's hard for a gay couple to provide that.

A child needs someone to follow. Gay parents doubtly fit the shoes, that i agree.

 

[Aenama]

Why does sexual preference matter when raising kids?

 

[Thread]

well, did you read the thread?

 

[CptStern]

over 50% of marriages end in divorce, should we ban heterosexual couples from having children because they have a 50% chance of having one parent? times change, people adapt, it's time to move on from idiotic notions of what is right and wrong based which is based on a book full of horrors much much worse than any sexual issue imaginable

 

[Thread]

over 50% of marriages end in divorce, should we ban heterosexual couples from having children because they have a 50% chance of having one parent? times change, people adapt, it's time to move on from idiotic notions of what is right and wrong based which is based on a book full of horrors much much worse than any sexual issue imaginable

you're getting me wrong on that second part. i am not into idiotic notions of what is right and worng based which is based on a book full of horrors muh much worse than any sexual issue imaginable.

nevermind i don't think you were referring to me.

 

[Kadayi]

A child needs a male and a female role model. It's hard for a gay couple to provide that. Although studies show that single-parent house holds are even worse at providing role models than gay households, so it isn't an easy issue.

Up until Victorian times it was pretty much the community that raised children (especially the elderly) whilst the able bodied adults worked the fields etc, the nuclear family ideal is something that has arrived out of consumerism and advertising (buy your own home, live your own life), but isn't particularly favourable in terms of genuine child development as there is a strong tendency for the parents psychological traits (good and bad) to carry across, disfunctional parents breed disfunctional children, and keep Psychologists busy. Any form of closed family unit is a bad idea.

 

[CptStern]

A child needs someone to follow. Gay parents doubtly fit the shoes, that i agree.

you're an authority on child rearing? how many children do you have of your own?

One of the main reasons is because some just become homosexuals because of a "little desire of that" in them, they have nothing wrong in their psyhics to be such.

was that written in english?

That's the most worst kind of a homosexual, really.
But otherwise, why does a man becomes homosexual?

did you choose to be heterosexual? if so when, where and under what circumstances ...I look forward to your response

If he feels like he's attracted to men, then make a surgery and become a woman, don't try being a man and a woman in one, that's not right.

yes because that's what all gays want, to become women ..please stfu ..I'm all for free speech but some people should never open their mouths

 

[SpotEnemyBoats]

disk cheney's daughter is a lesbian.

 

[Qonfused]

Disk Cheney.

 

[Crushenator 500]

horrors much much worse than any sexual issue imaginable

Even scat porn..? :E

 

[Aenama]

ewwwwwwwwwww

 

[CptStern]

Even scat porn..? :E

yes ...it's there ...somewhere in the middle

 

[Darkside55]

But then I thought about the children they would raise. It's not that I have a problem that homosexuals multiply or anything of that sort, so I suppose my question is, what if the child, instead of assuming his or her natural sexual orientation, is wrongly made to believe he or she is a homosexual by their parents' influence? What if inside, he/she really feels wrong by becoming what their parents are or vice versa; making them psychologically confused? Is this the same old thing about homosexuals being 'born, not made' (i am terribly uninformed on how homosexuals feel on this aspect)?

What I think is, that once the children raised by homosexual familes are fully educated they will make a decision themselves, but then again, most part of things come from where you're from, and how you were educated I.E. family.

That doesn't make any sense. If a child were to base his or her sexual orientation around the parents, then there would be no gay people raised by straight parents. A person will become sexually attracted to whatever they become attracted to; sexuality, as far as I've learned, is the one thing a person can never lie to themselves about. You can be confused, you might think you should be attracted to something and might even attempt to force yourself to be attracted to it, but in the end you can't. So to say, "what if the child is wrongly made to believe he or she is a homosexual by their parents' influence" is something that doesn't work. That kid could force themselves to be gay all they wanted but they'd always know it wasn't true. Your biology will ultimately dictate your behavior.

 

[ríomhaire]

A child needs a male and a female role model.

Evidence?

 

[Nemesis6]

Marriage is OK with me, but raising a family... I don't know.

It's gonna be hell explaining it to the child, and the child is going to have a tough time as a result. I hate to say this, but I think it influences the child negatively. What I mean by this is that the child is going to face a wave of negativity from early on, and if it chooses the same sexual preferance as its parents, untill it dies, too. Besides, imagine how early life must be like for the child. Suddenly, Kintergarten isn't all that fun anymore when your name isn't Andy anymore, but "Homo".

 

[CptStern]

Marriage is OK with me, but raising a family... I don't know.

yet any heterosexual couple can have a child regardless of their suitibility? People who adopt are far more capable as parents because they actually want kids

It's gonna be hell explaining it to the child, and the child is going to have a tough time as a result. I hate to say this, but I think it influences the child negatively. What I mean by this is that the child is going to face a wave of negativity from early on, and if it chooses the same sexual preferance as its parents, untill it dies, too.

you chose to be heterosexual?

Besides, imagine how early life must be like for the child. Suddenly, Kintergarten isn't all that fun anymore when your name isn't Andy anymore, but "Homo".

kids are unaware of sexuality especially at that age ..if anything the other kids will get their prejudice from their parents ..so it's not the kids fault the other kids parents are idiots

 

[The Monkey]

Evidence?

I can't seem to find any online.

I support gay marrige and all that, don't get me wrong, I just don't think that we should jump to the direct conclusion that two women or two men always are equally suitable to raise children as a man and a woman. But I think that a bigger "threat" to the children are all there single-households that's adopting.

 

[Darkside55]

Children are usually more accepting of things than adults who already have prejudices formed by their parents/friends/society. I know you were exaggerating when you said kindergarten, but I see where you're coming from. Thing is, with gays being more mainstream today than before, I can't imagine future children being picked on all too much for having gay parents. That's more of something that would've occurred with our generation than the next generation(s).

That being said kids are cruel and will pick on anyone for anything.

As for explaining it to the child though (the parents' relationship), you're wrong in that respect. It won't be "hell." In fact there's this story that I really love where a child saw two gay people kissing on the street and asked her dad why those two guys were kissing, and he replied, "Because sometimes a man can love a man." And the girl said "Ok" and left it at that. Kids view things as normal if they have no one there to tell them it's abnormal (which, just to make sure no one mistakes my meaning, I'm saying that if no one tells them it's abnormal they'll think it's fine, not that I think being gay is abnormal).

 

[CptStern]

perhaps we should ban christian parents from having kids ...the very first time the kid starts talking about adam and eve he'll be rediculed ...we should protect children therefore it only makes sense that anyone who has anything about their lives that someone might find disagreeable they should immediately be sterilized so as to not adversely affect any children they might have at some point in their lives

 

[Thread]

That doesn't make any sense. If a child were to base his or her sexual orientation around the parents, then there would be no gay people raised by straight parents. A person will become sexually attracted to whatever they become attracted to; sexuality, as far as I've learned, is the one thing a person can never lie to themselves about. You can be confused, you might think you should be attracted to something and might even attempt to force yourself to be attracted to it, but in the end you can't. So to say, "what if the child is wrongly made to believe he or she is a homosexual by their parents' influence" is something that doesn't work. That kid could force themselves to be gay all they wanted but they'd always know it wasn't true. Your biology will ultimately dictate your behavior.

You've made a good point. Thanks.

However, biology is always certain, which is why we have things like schizophrenia, psychosis, emotional trauma, and similar psychological disorders which may lead a person to believe that he or she is right for a short, perhaps long prolonged amount of time. But after they've figured it out, what is right for them? The answer may lie in a delusional distress, caused by events that take place in early childhood, events happening around the person, etc.

Sigh. I guess a person raised like this ultimately has to realize what they're made for, like you say... but can biology always be right?

 

[Kadayi]

Childrens behavioural patterns are modelled on the activities of those around them (walking, talking, etc). The more exposure they have to a diversity of people to model from, the better adjusted they will be in the long term. Certainly being brought up in a Homosexual household won't necesarily result in a straight child turning gay, but a lack of hetrosexual reference points in early development might hamstring the childs behavioural patterns in later life.

 

[DaMaN]

Firstly, there is increasing proof that sexual orientation is biologically determined: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biology_and_sexual_orientation

Secondly, to anybody thinking that homosexual couples are less suitable than any other combination of parents, please provide proof.

Please provide proof that a child raised by a man and a woman, or just a man, or just a woman, is more suitable than two men or two women.

I mean, come on. People don't have any problems with one man raising a child. People don't have any problems with one woman raising a child. (More than 25% of US children are raised by a single parent.)

People don't have any problems with a man and his brother raising a child.
People don't have any problems with a man and his father raising a child.
People don't have any problems with a woman and her sister raising a child.
People don't have any problems with a woman and her mother raising a child.

People don't lift a FINGER to prevent abusive parents from raising children.

And yet, having two fathers or two mothers is somehow going to damage a child more.

 

[CptStern]

yes they will be forever horribly damaged ..they might learn to respect others :O or to appreciate others for who they are!!! <shudder> ..they might even have a more developed fashion sense!! the horror

 

[Thread]

@CptStern: -_- kudos for proving a point earlier though.
@ DaMaN: Thanks, that's all I needed.

edit 2 - just out of curiosity, er.... "sane" homosexuality is fundamented purely out of choice, amirite? "insane" would be out of a psychological or socially induced problem. which are really just choices that one does not really become aware of.

 

[brink's]

Plus, adoption agencies have to make sure you will be a suitable parent( gay or not). So, assuming the adoption agency does it's job correctly, one could argue that gay parents ( as a whole) may be even more qualified to raise children then straight parents ( as a whole) because all gay parents get their child only after being thoroughly investigated.

 

[Darkside55]

You've made a good point. Thanks.

However, biology is always certain, which is why we have things like schizophrenia, psychosis, emotional trauma, and similar psychological disorders which may lead a person to believe that he or she is right for a short, perhaps long prolonged amount of time. But after they've figured it out, what is right for them? The answer may lie in a delusional distress, caused by events that take place in early childhood, events happening around the person, etc.

Sigh. I guess a person raised like this ultimately has to realize what they're made for, like you say... but can biology always be right?

Once a person figures out their sexuality, that becomes what's right for them. It's what "fits." Everyone understands this feeling. Despite any other thoughts or emotions or past events, when the knowledge of your own sexuality clicks, that takes precedence.

Biology is always right...although I'm sort of hesitant to use the word "right," as it implies there's a "wrong" somewhere. Let's just say that biology always wins out.

 

[DaMaN]

@CptStern: -_- kudos for proving a point earlier though.
@ DaMaN: Thanks, that's all I needed.

edit 2 - just out of curiosity, er.... "sane" homosexuality is fundamented purely out of choice, amirite? "insane" would be out of a psychological or socially induced problem. which are really just choices that one does not really become aware of.

Actually, there is increasing research stating that "sane" homosexuality is NOT out of choice, and that it is caused by an imbalance in the mothers hormones. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biology_and_sexual_orientation

So heterosexuality/homosexuality is scientifically most likely something you are born with, like brown hair or blue eyes.

 

[Kadayi]

DaMan

Your post seems more concerned about peoples Right to bring up children, rather than what is necesarily good for the children themselves. The well being of a child should always take on more importance than the fulfilling of an adults social needs imho.

Also yes a single parent can raise a child (I'm proof), but there are a lot of negative side effects associated with it:-

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Single-parent_family#Single_parenting_and_child_development

As for providing proof that being brought up by a gay couple is detrimental to a childs wellbeing, it's a little too early for studies to show. I'm sure in 20 years or so an accurate assessment will be in place to provide some feedback. Given the pisspoor record of single parents I would hold out for any revelations tbh.

As I stated earlier, I'm personally against the whole nuclear family thing fullstop, because parents tend to sow their failings into their children. I can't think of one person I know whose personality hasn't been defined by their relationship with their parents. If you want well adjusted children, bring them up in a close localised community.

 

[DaMaN]

DaMan

Your post seems more concerned about peoples Right to bring up children, rather than what is necesarily good for the children themselves. The well being of a child should always take on more importance than the fulfilling of an adults social needs imho.

Also yes a single parent can raise a child (I'm proof), but there are a lot of negative side effects associated with it:-

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Single-parent_family#Single_parenting_and_child_development

As for providing proof that being brought up by a gay couple is detrimental to a childs wellbeing, it's a little too early for studies to show. I'm sure in 20 years or so an accurate assessment will be in place to provide some feedback. Given the pisspoor record of single parents I would hold out for any revelations tbh.

As I stated earlier, I'm personally against the whole nuclear family thing fullstop, because parents tend to sow their failings into their children. I can't think of one person I know whose personality hasn't been defined by their relationship with their parents.

Correct, my post IS concerned with the parent's right to bring up a child. Everybody else, (heterosexual couples, single parents, etc,) have the right to bring up a child, why shouldn't homosexual couples?

If we are living in a society of equal rights, they should. Period.

The question of whether having homosexual parents will "turn" a child homosexual has already been addressed: according to most scientists, sexuality is determined at birth, so homosexual parents can't possibly "turn" a child homosexual unless they modify his DNA directly.

So what this question really comes down to is whether having homosexual parents will "damage" a child in a psychological or emotional way. Since there are very few documented cases of children being raised by homosexual parents, there is no evidence either way. As you pointed out, a child having a single mother or father can be quite damaging, and research suggests that there are higher risks associated with having a single parent. Does that mean that all children MUST be raised in a two-parent environment? No, of course not. (Besides, one could also argue that a large majority of single parents are poor to start off with, and having only one parent both working and caring for a child would tend to skew the results - is it because there is only one parent or is it because only one parent can make so much money, especially if that single parent was quite poor to start off with. Essentially is damage caused by only having one parent or is it caused by the limited amount of money one parent can bring in? Social or economic?)

So rather than have a bunch of discriminative lawsuits about what biologically-determined sexual preferences are best for raising kids, it's probably a Good Idea (TM) to allow homosexual couples the same adoption rights as anyone else.

Besides, in my opinion, a heterosexual child having homosexual parents won't have any more "damage" than a homosexual child having heterosexual parents.

 

[Geogaddi]

I don't agree with the argument that gays will force/raise their kids to be homofags. If anything, they're going to be the most tolerant. Right?