i hate "customers"

I hate Bus-drivers, they're so obnoxious, but then again - some of the customers they must get :p
 
Ha, if I didn't have previous retail experience, the first half hour of my first shift at mcdonalds would have done it. Bleh...

The best ones are when they ask you for something you no longer stock, and then, when you say "We no longer stock this" they go "Well you used to...". I mean, seriously, do they think I'm going to turn round and say "You right, we did, let me just pull out my magic ****ing wand and make one appear for you out of the air..."

Ahh, the old memory is kicking in now.

"What drill bit do I need to do this bit of drilling with (Or whatever tool, whatever job)"
"You need a blah blah, I'll show you"
"No, I don't need a blah, I need a bleh"
"WTF? Why did you ****ing well ask me then?"
"err..."

The place where I worked was selling a large amount of garden furniture, and hit on the bright idea or selling it at stupid prices in spring when no one wanted it anyway, and slashing it to normal price later and calling it a "30% off everything sale" (Cunning ;))
Anyway, as the guy in charge of the garden furniture, I was called to the checkouts to deal with a couple of women that were getting arsy. So up I go.
Me - "Hi, can I help at all"
"Yeah, you have signs up saying 30% off everything, but all our stuff came up at the marked prices"
"Well it would, given that the prices marked include the 30% off."
"You have to display that"
You are absolutley right we do. That is why our 30% off banners say "Marked prices include 30% off" and why each individual shelf label has the previous price on it"
"No they don't"
*I pick up something she has bought and pass it to her*
"Read the label on that"
"Dosen't say anything about it"
"Could you read it aloud for me?"
*Reads the price aloud*
"Now the slightly smaller one below it"
*Reads of price below, which is crossed through and 30% higher*
"Happy now?"
"No. Your printing is to small. You want to take the stickers down before the police come and make you"
*At this point I kind of lost patience*
"Oh my god, please don't call the police. I'd be fired if the police came screaming up here, lights flashing and put me in cuffs for pricing things other than how you deem they should be priced. But if you do, could I get you to represent me? I assume you are a very good laywer to know more than our legal team at head office, who check that every item we print follows the rules. And of course, to have the police called, you are no doubt a judge or other powerful political figure, as anyone else would only be able to get trading standards. However, if, as I suspect, you are in fact a stupid woman who simply didn't take the time to read the labels properly, I suggest you pay for your items and leave, before I throw you out. Ok?"
"You can't say that"
*I couldn't belive she still hadn't walked away*
"Um, yes, I rather belive I can. You can tell by the way I just said it."
"Well, you can't throw me out"
"Do you know, I rather belive I can. Is there anything else I can do for you?"
*In a very very small voice* "No"
"Goodbye"
*Exit stage left...*

Of course I lost my job over that one, but I was about to quit anyway, so I figured I would get out of my notice period...

Please do not ask me questions that you will not believe the answer to. I do not have the item out the back. I have discovered that items sell better when on the shop floor, and as the only member of staff on the garden furniture department, not only do I keep it well stocked, I know what we do and don't have, without having to go check. So, when you ask me for something, which I tell you we haven't got, accept it when I say there is none out the back. Do not question me, do not ask me to "Check anyway" and do not ask to see the manager. My manger hates you even more than I do and has more power. Do not **** with him, he will make you cry. Yes, I know you are an all powerful customer who must be obeyed at all costs, but so was the last guy and he made him cry to. Now piss off and order the item you want.

Oh, oh oh, and speaking of orders, understand the following. Our customer service desk staff are inept. They only knows what thier little 486 tells them and it is wrong anyway. What this means is, that when you ask if an item is in, they will check the code and see that it is, but they will not look at the little flag that says "Order only", nor will they note the fact that this order only item, is, strangley enough, here for someone else. Also note, that I am not responcible for what is a stock item and what is not, so shouting at me will not produce good results. For example, when I get called down from my lunch to be shouted at, once I have explained, you will no doubt want the next size down table that we do carry in stock, but we have no stock on the shop floor. this is one case where I will go and have a look. I will wander off to the warehouse and sit on the stack of the item you want and smoke a ciggarette. I may have a chat with some friends or read a few pages or a book. After 20 minutes of looking, without of course moving from my stack of items, one of which you want, I will be back to appologise for the delay, explain that I looked everywhere, and send you on your way. Of course, if you really piss me off, 'your way' well may be to another branch a town or two away.

Please also note, I do not work on commision and that I have a personal hatred for the store manager. Thus, I do not care that you are "Taking your business elsewhere" Especially when you are after an item that we sell but have no stock of, and that I know for a fact is only sold in our shop for about 30 miles around. As such, do not give me hassle for not caring that you 'need' this item today. You will be instructed to go forth and multiply and subsiquently ignored.



Sorry for the overly long post, but it was very nice to get this off my chest. This job was over a year and a half ago and I still hate all people that abuse shop assistants to this day because of it. I'm so glad I have an office job now.

*Note - the 30% off woman part is not very accurate, as I proceeded to get very drunk in order to forget her presence, however, its roughly what I said, and it was a major contributing factor to my being laid off (Final straw and all that)
 
I really hate shop assistants :angel:

Nah, I'm just kidding :p, the ammount of abuse assistants have is phenomenal. This is a purely accurate account of what happened and I cannot believe this guy tried to pull this off:

*customer is standing in front of a till at MacDonalds, waiting to be served. It is about 7:00pm at night, and its dark and there's few people around. His son, about 8 years old comes in and starts speaking to him...*
Man: (end of conversation) alright, go ask her if that's ok
Assistant: (eventually getting round to serving him) hello, what would you like?
Man: Erm... I'm being served already
Assistant: Ok, so what did you as for?
Man: I can't remember, but I've already ordered
Assistant: I'm sorry, I don't have anything here, what was it?
Man: I don't know, but I have ordered something
Assistant: Was it two cheesburgers?
Man: No, I hate cheese, I think it was beef
Assistant: I'm really sorry, we have no record of anything here, did you pay?
Man: Yes, I ordered and paid
*Assistant walks off to find manager. Comes back with manager and another assistant is following them. They look through the records and can't find anything.*
Manager: I'm really sorry, there is no record of anything here
Man: But I bought two beef burgers!
Manager: There is no record of you paying on here, do you know what till it was?
Man: I can't remember, it was on one of them
Manager: There is no record here or on any of the other tills, you did not buy anything
Man: Yes I did! Fine, Ill have to pay again then
Manager: ok, what would you like?
...

I was sitting over on the bench and saw everything. It was quite amusing how the guy tried to do it. But it was also really annoying - he just stood there lying out of his front teeth. It was quite unbelievable, but it happened just like that.

:sniper: :) <- obnoxious customer
 
i get insane customers all the time working in a petrol station , i think its the fumes getting to them :p
 
Link said:
Me - "Hi, can I help at all"
"Yeah, you have signs up saying 30% off everything, but all our stuff came up at the marked prices"
"Well it would, given that the prices marked include the 30% off."
"You have to display that"
You are absolutley right we do. That is why our 30% off banners say "Marked prices include 30% off" and why each individual shelf label has the previous price on it"
"No they don't"

I get that a hell of a lot where i used to work, and will work in the holidays. Customers just cant read, i dont mean to be racist here or over generalising but where i live and in my experience, the worst and most frustrating customer was the Indian 'Freshie' woman... they dont understand that the prices include the 10% off or whatever the deal is, when its 2 for 1 they get the wrong products mixed up and you go and replace it for the right one for them and they dont want it. They complain endlessly and ask the prices of everything in their basket, most of which they dont want saying its too expensive, and then they come out with a £20 - £50 note to pay for all 2 items they actually bought.... it's so frustrating sometimes. Often we get smelly customers that you want out of the shop and your face asap or really moany ones who never take anything you say to be true just because you are a sales assistant and demand to see the manager.... argh, its awful. Never work in retail, ever.

Druckles said:
I really hate shop assistants :angel:

Nah, I'm just kidding :p, the ammount of abuse assistants have is phenomenal. This is a purely accurate account of what happened and I cannot believe this guy tried to pull this off:

*customer is standing in front of a till at MacDonalds, waiting to be served. It is about 7:00pm at night, and its dark and there's few people around. His son, about 8 years old comes in and starts speaking to him...*
Man: (end of conversation) alright, go ask her if that's ok
Assistant: (eventually getting round to serving him) hello, what would you like?
Man: Erm... I'm being served already
Assistant: Ok, so what did you as for?
Man: I can't remember, but I've already ordered
Assistant: I'm sorry, I don't have anything here, what was it?
Man: I don't know, but I have ordered something
Assistant: Was it two cheesburgers?
Man: No, I hate cheese, I think it was beef
Assistant: I'm really sorry, we have no record of anything here, did you pay?
Man: Yes, I ordered and paid
*Assistant walks off to find manager. Comes back with manager and another assistant is following them. They look through the records and can't find anything.*
Manager: I'm really sorry, there is no record of anything here
Man: But I bought two beef burgers!
Manager: There is no record of you paying on here, do you know what till it was?
Man: I can't remember, it was on one of them
Manager: There is no record here or on any of the other tills, you did not buy anything
Man: Yes I did! Fine, Ill have to pay again then
Manager: ok, what would you like?
...

I was sitting over on the bench and saw everything. It was quite amusing how the guy tried to do it. But it was also really annoying - he just stood there lying out of his front teeth. It was quite unbelievable, but it happened just like that.

:sniper: :) <- obnoxious customer

I've come across this Allot... people will do anything to get something for free.
 
one of the first jobs i had was working in a poundshop. you wouldn't believe the amount of people we had asking how much something costed :rolleyes:
 
My job at Index is to work at the collection point, where I'm supposed to find the products in the stockrooms the customers want and give it to them.

You wouldn't believe how many people come over to us demanding a refund, even though thats clearly the job of "Payment and Service"

I like the majority of customers that I serve, 90% of them to be in fact. Its just the other 10% that I hate with a passion. Well, first impressions are the most important people keep on tellin me. It works on both ends of the counter.

(We exclude the money back guarentee from certain products due to hygiene reasons)
One such customer demanded a refund because she said a mechanical can-opener did not work. We tested it the back. And told her. She went away.

The next day, the same women came in and said exactly the same thing, so we did the same thing. We told her, but she did not believe us. So we took it out front to demonstrate it to her. Then she told us it does not cut cans. So we got a can from the up stairs restaurant and demonstrated. It worked. She went home with anger.

The Saturday after, her husband came in, with the same can opener. He said same thing and said that his wife was refused a refund. We explained it to him that we couldn't give a refund because of hygiene reasons. We also mentioned that he wouldn't get a refund even if the item was damaged but an exchange for another can opener. He went away. Ten minutes later, he came back, but we all were told to ingnore him.

Dang
 
Heh, nice to see I'm not the only one with a shit job. Here's a few of my memories of working at the DIY store B&Q.

C = Customer.
M = Me.

C: Excuse me (looking at me with a bright orange apron on), do you work here?
M: Uh huh.
C: Excuse me (taking into account this is a DIY store), where's your dog food?
M: (taking the piss) Down in the gardening dept next to the fish food.
*customer comes back 10 minutes later*
C: I found the fish food, but I couldnt find the dog food.
M: Wtf.
 
Its amazing how many times we have been told to not swear in front of the customers, even though they are clearly swearing at us.

An eye for an eye I tell you

Sometimes, I can understand their frustration but half of the time, its not the people who work in the stores fault. But either management or logistics (includes home delivery) causes the problem
 
gh0st said:
i hate them. this conversation is real, and unedited.

customer:"Hey, do you guys have plain yogurt"

me:"Yes sir, right behind you"

customer:"Uh.. that non fat yogurt..."

me:"Yes, can i help you with anything else"

customer:"no... its NON fat..."

m:"whats wrong with that"

c:"i want regular"

m:"isnt this healther for you"

c:"no i want regular"

m:"ok follow me"

i then lead him to the other dairy aisle, for some reason we need 2.

m:"ok, here you go, heres all the rest of our plain yogurt"

c:"these ones are fat free!"

m:"sir why do you need anything other than that"

c:"because its the principle"

then my dumb manager comes. ill cal lhim detective dipshit.

dd: may i help you 2?

m: no ive got ever-

c: Yes! where is your plain yogurt

dd: right here

c: no, these are all fat free, or have honey in them. i want plain.

dd: uh... we've got honey flavored right here *points*

m: he asked for a lar-

dd: thank you, i have things under control

c: i wanted a larger container, like that one

dd: ok, heres one thats honey flavored

c: i dont want that one.

dd: heres one, its organic

c: yeah but its fat free

it continues from here, but its not really worth writing or reading.


So through that whole conversation that both you and your manager had with the customer, neither of you ever thought to show him the full fat plain yogurt?
 
Razor said:
So through that whole conversation that both you and your manager had with the customer, neither of you ever thought to show him the full fat plain yogurt?

I thought that as well, was he a tubby by any chance ;)
 
He_Who_Is_Steve said:
Heh...only took me 2 days working in a lemonade cart at our local theme park when I was 15.

"Your ****ing lemonade has lemons in it! I'm allergic to lemons, guy, what the ****?!"

Druckles said:
I hate Bus-drivers, they're so obnoxious, but then again - some of the customers they must get :p

This one bus driver I had, oh-ho we picked on him so much. Then this one day he stopped on the side of the road and refused to move or let anyone off until we settled down. It was hilarious for the first half hour but then I had to pee.
 
Druckles said:
I was sitting over on the bench and saw everything. It was quite amusing how the guy tried to do it. But it was also really annoying - he just stood there lying out of his front teeth. It was quite unbelievable, but it happened just like that.I le

:sniper: :) <- obnoxious customer

Another thing I learned in my days of retail is how incredibly cheap some will sell thier integrity. I don't know about you, but my honor is considerably higher than the price I save scamming two burgers.
 
Bad^Hat said:
This one bus driver I had, oh-ho we picked on him so much. Then this one day he stopped on the side of the road and refused to move or let anyone off until we settled down. It was hilarious for the first half hour but then I had to pee.

Oh I had a bus driver like that. I remember he wore a cowboy hat, and boots with spurs on them. We all startred signing a song of some sort, and he got really pissed at us and pulled over. Then he started tapping his foot, like he was going to snap and slaughter us in about ten seconds. He was fun.
 
Yeah, bus drivers always pull over, it's soo annoying... but other times when there IS something to pull over for, they just carry on going!
 
I suppose having been a customer and shop assistant, it gives me insight and patience at times when I might have got annoyed.

However...some people are just plebs. So I've decided that the 'You've got to smile no matter what' work ethic is going....It works quite well actually. I think i've mentioend this before in fact...

Anyway, if a customer annoys me for spiteful reasons, then I'l let them know it. So instead of going home at the end of the day, annoyed and frustrated with people I don't know and won't see again, I'l be quite satisfied. I think its a better way of working actually. Just because I'm a member of staff, doesn't mean I'm not still human. Something the store doesn't realise, is that there is a big difference between people skills and "The customer is always right" mentality. (Of course, there are times when I just annoy people for the sake of it because I'm in that kind of mood...but not the nice respectful customers :))

For instance, a prime example of my system working was when an irate woman came in searching for rice pudding. They had recently moved it, so I wasn't sure where it was. However, I tried to help her find it first by looking where I thought it was (before it was moved) and then I looked around in palces where it might be. All the while she was either off doing her shopping or stood next to me complaining about how I (Yes, she refered to me and not the store) just messed her about by changing things round in the store. So in the end I just said "Look, I have a lot of work to do, and you standing here shouting at me isn't going to get me paid..so please, carry on with your shopping, because I don't know where the rice pudding is." She just stared in shock, and when she was about to speak again I just said in a cheesy american accent "You have a nice day now" and walked off. As I was walking off, a man who I can only assume was her husband (From the way he was walking with her most of the time) "Don't listen to her, she gets like this sometimes. Thanks for the help"

That made me feel good for the rest of the day. :D



I don't mind bus drivers here. Its not that they are especially great people...they are just normal guys, who have to put up with so much crap. Especially those working nights...if you've seen some of the things people try with bus drivers, you'd want to give them all medals.
 
lol, women :rolleyes: <-joke btw :p

yeah, those women in MacDonalds were being real nice to the guy who were trying to rip em off. If it were me, I would've beaten the hell out of him :p
 
I used to work at a casino and some guy came up to me (you won't believe this) and blamed ME, ME! because he lost 4000 dollars in 3 months. I just nodded and walked away laughing. What I really wanted to say was:

"It's not my fault or the casino's fault that you lost 4000 dollars in 3 months, in fact, who the hell spends that kind of money in a casino in 3 months?? Your a dumbass for thinking that we here are responsible for your stupid loss and take a money management course you old fart..oh ya, and it's YOUR decision to come spending money here. We don't make you spend money...you spend it yourself. Now go home and cry to your fat wife and lonely child you bastard."

That's what I thought while I was walking away...Some of the people we get are so stuck up and stupid, that I wish I had a taser gun or something to shut them up. People are stupid!
 
I worked in a small Co-op store (Co-op Welcome..)...Glamerous I know :).

Anyway, we have this indian woman come in, and she buys everything and everythings cool. Now Co-op for those of you who are unsure has a dividend card, which is a card inwhich you earn 10p on every co-op item and 1p on normal items or something silly. Now i'd scan through all her stuff, complete the transaction, with a smile and a step in my heel. Then she starts....."Oh, you forgot my dividend points"..Despite the fact they're meant to give me the card. "Well, heres your receipt and a number to phone to get your points put back on"

So she says: "No, i'm not wasting 45p a minute for 25p worth of points.."

So I thought, well if she won't phone the free number (shows how observant she was) she won't mind just going..(As their was a queue and my manager was up stairs being a fat lazy bitch). So I said "i'm sorry" looked at the next person and grabbed there basket..

So she then says: "Well, refund this all through, put it back through and put my points on!"

Now you can imagine how much of a hassle, with one till, one member of staff, and 6 people waiting...So I asked her to wait until I finished serving everyone, and she refused. So I just told her to go away then if she didn't want to wait and ring the free number.

Customers are so observant, and they're all nice until something they do goes wrong and then its my fault.

In the same shop, I also had a woman who had crutches come into the shop, she was scottish, had a few too many drinks and had a broken hip or some shit. So she dropped one of our lovely donuts, so I went over picked it up, and helped her around a bit, just being nice as I do! Then she came to the till, where me and a mate were working, and I felt like a rest, so I said "Could you serve her" to my friend, not meaning for her to hear...and then she kicks off:

"Oh, just because I dropped a ****ing donut and i'm disabled you decide to discriminate against me and refuse to ****ing serve me"

me: no not at all madam, I was just feeling tired having been on my feet all day
cust: You're a ****ing liar, you don't want to serve me because i'm disabled..
me: not at all..I'm sorry if it appears that way
cust: Shut up *attempts to punch me*
me: *hits police alarm*
cust: *gets arrested*

And then everyone rejoiced. Was good day that was.

Customers are stupid

The end
 
Lol, it's usually women, I guess they're worried about that kinda thing
 
I do oddjobs at a bank.

It got broken into a few weeks ago, but all the security on anything but the empty hall was on so nothing was stolen, but there's this woman who constantly complains how ill she is, and that she needs serving right away. When the cash machine was broken she stormed in and demanded we either fix it or serve her right then and there. We all hate her with all we have.

Anyway, after the break in, the Bill obviously barred it away for a day while they took a look. Stupid Bitch comes with fag in mouth saying how she needs to come in because she's "dreadfully ill, you wouldn't no, nor would you want to" but the poor copper won't let her. She starts stamping her feet and trying to push through, but she still isn't let in. She eventually walked away at a pace crying. We all laughed until we bled at Main Branch when the copper called up.

:>
 
I referee hockey during the winter and I hate dumb coaches.

Where I live there are five levels of minor hockey. Novice, Atom, Pee-Wee, Bantam, and Midget. Well last year there was no two-line pass in any level except Novice, the year before, only Atom and Novice, and the year before Pee-Wee, Atom, and Novice. Well, this year, when I was reffing Bantam coaches were complaining about two-line pass calls, when there is no two-line pass anywhere in minor hockey at the moment. If they're in Bantam, that means they would have had at least two years of no two-line pass call...yet they had no idea there wasn't this year. I just laugh to myself and say there's no two-line pass.

It's not exactly a huge deal, it's just retarded.
 
Razor said:
So through that whole conversation that both you and your manager had with the customer, neither of you ever thought to show him the full fat plain yogurt?
incredibally we dont SELL "full fat" plain yogurt. 2 dairy isles, hundreds of flavors of yogurt but none of what he wanted.

however, what were FORCED to do, and is ingrained into our heads since the beginning is to make as many possible sales out of any kind of contact with customer. "do you need batteries with that electrict toothbrush?" that kind of thing. ****ing whores.
 
Farrowlesparrow said:
a man who I can only assume was her husband (From the way he was walking with her most of the time)
came up behind me and punched me smack in the face... then we had a all out brawl in the spagetti section... i won, walloped him with a mega-big bag of frusilli.

Wow, thats what i thought was going to happen... but no, a Customer was Nice to you.. oh my God. :eek:
 
I work as a bagger at a grocery store. Its menial and humiliating at times, but it actually pays well. Anyway, some woman comes up and demands paper bags. Well, my store frowns on using paper, as plastic is cheaper, so they keep paper under the counter. This wouldnt be bad at all if it werent for the customer's next request: "I want them light" Ok, a minor annoyance, but doable, as she only had about $50 of groceries. (For reference, you can fit $100 in one paper bag easy, 2-3 packed light) So I start bagging, and almost immediatly, she exclaims, "No no that's too heavy!" I look in the bag and theres no more than a half dozen item in it. I could lift it with my pinky. So, I take some out and continued on. The fun part came when I got to the watermelon. I put it in the bag, and she says 'Thats too heavy, how am I going to lift that. I thought, Its a god damned watermelon lady! Wtf do you want me to do, cut it in half? Hey, how did you get it into the cart anyway? But instead I offered to put it into multiple (layered) bags, which ended up being 3. All in all I used somewhere between 20-30 bags on her $50 order. Just so you know, I once fit $400 of food in around 15 bags..

Another woman wanted her groceries in a box and I told her that we only have bags. She didn't believe me and asked to speak to my manager, who also told her that we could not put her groceries in boxes. She said that it was rediculous and left.. without the groceries! My manager look just as confused as I was.
 
staticprimer said:
Hey, how did you get it into the cart anyway?
if i had a dime for every time ive thought that. that irks me so much

oh. we have these electric carts at my store for "disabled" customers. aside them is a poster saying "mobility!" and shows a middle aged man with a broken leg.

if only that were the case. the average cart user is one of the following

1) hugely obese. ie ass ballooning over the edge of the cart, i can HEAR the cart straining to carry these people across the store.
2) horrifyingly old, and nothing like the picture. these people are covered in skin disorders, and often carry a smell similar to burned broccoli. not only that, they are pompous jerks, and tread me like their bitch... which i am.
 
gh0st said:
1) hugely obese. ie ass ballooning over the edge of the cart, i can HEAR the cart straining to carry these people across the store.

Its worse when you can hear a cart wheeling towards you, only its overloaded with about 100 HDD's.. the person pushing them gets to you, stops, says: "Find which ones work and reformat them" and then walks away (probably smiling to themselves).

(after I was done, a further sentence was added: "You reformatted the 6 gig ones [~20 drives]? oh, you didnt have to..") :rolling: oh well... beats real work :p
 
ok you guys tell me if i was out of order:

in cafe rouge with my girlfriend today at heathrow airport.

order penne pasta. penne pasta arrives. waitress asks if i would like black pepper. I reply yes thank you.

I then ask the waitress "could i have some parmesan as well please?"

she looks a bit confused, i should have seen the warning sign,s but replies "yes of course" and scurries off to find some.

she comes back 5 minutes later with a small side plate full of thick shavings of parmesan cheese.

im thinking hmmmm. im eating pasta. i ask for parmesan cheese. instead of grated cheese on my pasta i get caesar salad style shavings.

i ask: "do i have to pay for this?", as grated parmesan is always free in restaurants with pasta. she looks bemused and replies yes. in the meantime another waitress arrives, looking amused "he wanted grated parmesan" she giggles, im like "yes thats right", she says "im sorry we dont do that here".

i think, fair enough, this is cafe rouge not one of Gordon Ramsays michelin starred restaurants....i finish the conv by saying "oh thats ok. sorry i dont want these then, sorry to bother you".

yet still the silly cow wanders off muttering to herself.


now i know what being a real waiter is like. during uni time vacations i work for probably the best Greek restaurant in North London as a waiter. Im on my feet non stop from 6pm to 3 or even 4 am. Thats a hard job, and i take shit from incredibly rude people - people click their fingers, demand demand demand, take the piss out of u when theyre drunk etc etc....but i get on with it and have a laugh wit the other guys.

this cow cant even take someone asking for parmesan with pasta.


its not all one way ya know....customers do get sh!t for no reason too.
 
Once I had two FAT middle-aged women in their "old people scooters" (I know what they're called) Come into the store, Here is the details
Characters
Me
fatty1
fatty2

Scene 1 “the horror begins”
fatty1&2 come tearing into the store at full scooter speed almost hitting (and most likely killing) a 4 or five year old girl
Me:- welcome to Frisch’s smoking or non?
Fatty 1 - We want a smoking booth, and not by the windows
fatty2 - agrees with 1
Me - our only non-window booth is in non-smoking
Fatty 1 - humph you people need to get more smoking tables
Fatty 2- agrees with 1
Me - ok ma'am follow me please

As I am walking to the table I hear a really annoying horn sound HONK
I turn to see that fatty 2, who happens to be taking up the whole damn aisle, honking her ass off at some little boy who dropped something.

Flash forward about 5 seconds
Fatty 1 and 2 are severely dismayed to find that their scooters don’t fit in the aisle, so they both park them right in front of the servers exit and get up and walk to the table.
Me - you guys enjoy your meal and your sever will be here in a second
Fatty- 1 I want a blahblah balhbalbah
Fatty 2- I would like a blahblahblahblah
Me- I will be sure to pass that on to your server
Fatty 2- No, YOU will get it for us because I don’t want to wait
Me- uhh ma'am I can’t work the computers because I am a busser today the system won’t let me take your order
Fatty 1- f*** the system, I want my damn blahblahblah now
Me- well ok then
I walk off and don’t bother with their order

Scene 2 “Rude whores”
As I am cleaning a table next to fatty 1 and 2 I realize they are smoking
Me excuse me, this is non-smoking you will have to put that out.
Fatty 2- No, I explicitly said smoking so I am going to smoke (even though she said nothing)
Me- And I said there were no smoking booths available
At this time I notice that she has a tremendous mass of fat hanging over the table, and I am disgusted
Fatty 1- listen dumbass I said smoking, and I damn well am going to smoke wherever you put me
Me-Listen to me TTTHIIIISSS ISSS NOOONNN SMMMOOOKKKINGGG PPUUTT IT OOUUTT (I said is slowly as to insult their intelligence ya see)
Fatty 2 staring at me indignantly – Listen you li’l s*** we don’t need to take this I want a manager
I get the manager and he goes to talk with them, comes back really angry (I fear the worst) and says “GOD I HATE THESE PEOPLE” ( I am relieved) stomps off to go smoke in his office

Scene 3 “the climax”
I am cleaning the glass doors
Fatty 1 and 2 are very upset about how the employees treated them and want to get their food for free,
Manager- you ate all your food, so you have to pay
Fatty 1- your service was horrible and the people here treated us like ****
Fatty 2- YEAH!
Manager – well it doesn’t really matter as there was nothing wrong with the food and you ate it all
Fatty 2- My burger was raw!!
Manager- Then why did you eat it?
Fatty 2- silence
Fatty 1- Well we Aint paying!!
Fatty 1 and 2 try to hightail it out of there on there scooters, unfortunately for them I was cleaning the door and hear the whole thing So I put my foot up against the door so they cant open it.
The manager calls the police
Fatty 1 and 2 are screaming and cussing at me at the top of their lungs, I laugh at them.
The police eventually come and fatty 1 is being very rude to a black officer
The whole thing ends in fatty 1 and 2 being handcuffed and escorted off the premises
THE END
This is all true, and I have had much worse experiences ranging from getting sucker-punched to having a knife pulled on me. (We were very close to a trailer park)

It was fine on every day but Sunday, Jesus Sundays sucked. But hey nine dollars an hour for cleaning tables was damn fine
 
God I hate lines, it is just so stressfull. Knowing that you have to help people and if you don't the manager will rape you...I am never working a job like that again...
 
staticprimer said:
Kommie = winner
Q.F.T. and what not. That's a pretty crappy time, but good to see they got screwed by the man in the end.
 
I'm always a good customer :) Plus I never ring call centeres or helplines, i'm above all that.

So, you guys should all love me.
 
lePobz said:
I'm always a good customer :) Plus I never ring call centeres or helplines, i'm above all that.

So, you guys should all love me.
I wub u
 
lePobz said:
I'm always a good customer :) Plus I never ring call centeres or helplines, i'm above all that.

So, you guys should all love me.

Instructions are for babies!
 
This site takes the cake

http://www.actsofgord.com

Many a tales, all for you!

"What's that?"
"That's Tobal #2. It's from Japan."

"That's illegal!"

"What?"

"It's illegal to import stuff from Japan!"

"Oh really?"

"Nintendo Power said that it's called 'the grey market' and it's illegal.

"You're taking your legal advice from Nintendo, a company that also says that renting games is illegal and that selling used games is piracy?"

"You're going to get into trouble."

"Because I bought a game from Japan?"

"Yes. That's illegal."

"Stay in school. And invest in a law book before you become a free lawyer dolling out legal advice from the book of Nintendo."




So this guy comes into the store, signs up a new account, and rents
Wrestlemania 2000 for the N64. Anyway, it never comes back. The people on the phone claim he moved, and the mail was returned. So off to collections it goes.

… a year later buddy comes storming into the store...

"WHAT THE **** IS THAT ABOUT ME OWING YOU MONEY!?!?"

"Uhm, sure. You owe me money. Sounds good to me. Do I guess who you are and make up a number, or do you want to tell me?"

"I tried to get a loan from my bank to buy a car, and my credit record shows I owe you $130! The collection company says I owe for Wrestlemania!"

"Ah, hang on. Ah yes, Wrestlemania. It was rented by you and never returned."

"So you listed it on my credit record?!"

"Well, yes."

"Now no one will lend me any money because they think I'm a bad credit risk!"

"You are a bad credit risk. This is hardly a surprise."

"You have to remove it from my record."

"Why?"

"So I can get a car loan."

"Let's see, you want me to commit fraud so you look better to your bank. Nope, not seeing any reason here for me to partake in your plan. How about you pay off the debt and then it will show it as being paid in full."

"No. I can't afford that."

"Then you'll be without a car loan. Good day. Don't let the door hit you on the way out."

Buddy then starts to almost cry as he leaves. Then the next day the nice folks from the money place across the road pay me a visit. Apparently he was trying to get money from everyone for his car loan. No one would touch him as long as he owed me. Alas, poor thief, for Gord has ruined him.

Next day, his girlfriend shows up. Now this is good, she tries to go into how she works at a bank and she knows "the law!"

"You can't list stuff like that on the bureau."

"Yes, yes I can. It's a debt, or a credit if you will. This credit was never paid. This would be an example of poor credit history."

"That's illegal!"

"And you're the one that works at the bank? Whoa, standards sure seem to have fallen. And what's illegal is buddy stealing the game. Why not just tell him to get off his ass and pay me, then he might get his loan. No one is going to give him any money as long as he has outstanding bad debts."

This went on back and forth about how she knows the law and she works at a bank and how her mom always said she was a special child. I later learned she was the part-time receptionist when I stopped in at the bank (as I had an old account there).
 
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