Ideas for TV shows...

[Sulkdodds]

...that would never be made, but would be awesome nonetheless.

Post your crazy-ass ideas (or, if you wish, crazy ass-ideas)!

I submit:

Blake's Seven

A hilarious literary adventure through the twisted guts of time and space! When famous poetic genius and 18th-century libertarian William Blake narrowly survives an assassination attempt while on a trip to revolutionary France, he believes the government is trying to kill him. In a dream it is revealed to him that somehow, things detailed in his own prophetic books are coming true - the future is ruled by an evil dictator, Urizen, who wants to control not only his own present, but the past and the future. To do this, he is sending assassins back in time to destroy all those who have inspired and brought hope - those revolutionaries of the written word who have crusaded against injust social orders. Blake realises that in order to save civilisation's future, he must take action.

Despite his animosity towards science, he recruits famous boffin Henry Cavendish to build a steampunk time machine, which he uses to travel to different periods in order to recruit a team of word warriors who can help him save the future. He gathers seven: Geoffrey Chaucer, one of the first English language writers; the lewd and passionate William Shakespeare, The Bard and Best Playwright Ever; François "Voltaire" Arouet, he of sharp wit and rage against the machine; prim, fastiduous proto-feminist Jane Austen, Lord Byron - mad, bad and dangerous to know, Charles Dickens, the distinguished bearded gentleman, and Oscar Wilde, the quickest tongue in the West. Together, they are: Blake's Seven.

Now this disparate group must wage a war of words against an insane, brutal, depraved and inconcievable dystopia: where corporations are the law, advertising is compulsorary, and the constant motion of George Orwell spinning in his grave is tapped in a gigantic power plant. Helping them are the Orcs - elusive revolutionaries trying to raise the voice of a downtrodden populace. As the clock ticks down to total martial law and the destruction of the past, Blake and his bickering, babbling, crowd of literary personalities must fight to save the fabric of space and time itself.

You may look forward to:
- Chaucer speaking Ye Olde Englishe and needing to use Shakespeare as an interpreter
- Shakespeare annoying Austen with his constant willy jokes
- Lord Byron interrogating a policeman with a chair leg and a can of mace
- Fueding between Wilde and Byron before the inevitable drunken homosexual tryst
- Charles Dickens attempting to fathom futuristic communications
- Everybody arguing over who flies the future-car while police helicopters close in

It'd be kind of like a cross between V for Vendetta, Transmetropolitan and Leage of Extroadinary Gentlemen. ie: awesome.



Your turn.

 

[Beerdude26]

Ultra-fast paced objective style killing spree with some large number of AI NPCs each player can command to fight in an all-out onslaught of senses. Machine guns blaring, explosions everywhere, insane vehicles with crazy amounts of hitpoints, rockets which can take out these vehicles in only a few hits and fire as fast as a machine gun, lasers which slice through players, melee weapons with crazy large physics forces and knock ragdolls back multiple feet into the air for that epic scale. A chaotic fight with some freaky techno music. Symbolism with easily differentiated forces like in Lord of the Rings, we can easily see the muddy, gritty black and red colors of Mordor which contrast the shining silver, white, and blue of the Human forces. Dragons, dinosaurs, spaceships, aliens, rag-tag bunch of humans Terminator-style, god-like beings all culminating in a battle of the ages, everyone fighting each other, factions blurred, exhilarating battles with large open spaces for charging at each other. People shooting one thing only to have ten, hundreds more swarm at them. In-your-face then rip off your skin and feed it to you action. Strider battles in HL2 only with lots of giant alien T-rexes, Godzilla things that blast your ass to hell with a plasma beam, giant starships, bunches of raptors amubushing your ass in the grass, space orcs, normal orcs, Uruk-Hai, Neo-style powers, melee moves of awesome, Striders, giants, fire-breathing dragons with wings that flap and stuff, Jormungand-huge style Dune worm snake serpents, Power Ranger mega-zords, ninjas, pirates, vikings, knights, catapults, trebuchets, ballistae, crossbows, longbows with correct arc that shoot exploding plasma arrows. Hydras, mthical beasts, titanic-sized robots of war charging at each other picking off the rest of the enemies easy as cake. Utra-BFG-styled-weapons that are a thousand times more powerful than a normal BFG that can kill anything. Apocalyptic magic spells or energy bursts which can completely destroy all enemies in an area. Flying vehicle fights in a huge multiple mile long space arena which can then swoop down from the sky to decimate land forces. Sea vehicles that can launch a carpet of bombs at a land target. A gigantic war effort that blows any other game out of the damn water into space, down sucked into a black hole with all kinds of ass-kicking. Think Supreme Commander only with an FPS and a thousand times more scope and an extreme adrenaline pumping eye-poking adventure. Thousands of things happening a minute. Hundreds of tracers. Things that can turn the tide of a battle only to be cut down by minor weak low-level soldier. Tactics like rushing or camping can be both rewarding and retarded. Good and evil fight each other and then some other guys. Every single thing designed to be awesome. Like rock-paper-scissors except the rock is a giant blowing up volcano with thousands of hydrogen bomb thetan bastards, the scissor is a frickin laser beam supernova explosion, and the paper is a dyson sphere designed to encapsulate a solar system or a galaxy or something. Thousands of deaths in only one round, people dying left and right, medics healing 20+ people in a minute. Multiple BF2-scaled battles which are largely weak and insignificant and barely affect the total outcome. Pyrrrhic victories, circle around each other flank my ass, Rome: Total War something like that, different groups and playing styles for every game player, play poker to beat a guy with a rocket, tetris your alien ass. Strategy is the overall winner as each side is crappily balanced. An RTS management system with a commander, RPG stat gaining system, why take control of a wimpy little space station or plant one little bomb when you can take control of a hundred space stations and plant a nuke. Crazy, mother****ing-assraping-violating all your senses, shoot everything that moves, think before you ****ing go there or you'll be swamped by a thousand Warthogs and Banshees instead of like two, giant bullshit, crotch grabbing, atomic bomb, large scale battles, every single second is another adventure, you spawn camp, you get wiped out by hundreds of crazy troops, twitch gaming, camping in fricking cave and mowing down hundreds of forces before having to be bombed out, gain hundreds of levels and become a god, giant Citadel style structures, Minas Tirith, Battle of Pelennor Fields, rockets are more plentiful than bullets, space ships whizzing above your heads, customizble classes, hundreds of giant colliding forces, bullet hoses, things that just kill in one hit, a normal player can't even be distinguished froma damn hacker because of all the crazy shit, huge war-torn ambushes, Save that damn Private Ryan and then blast all the Nazis to hell, Independence Day alien spaceship dog fights, **** you all, things that have superpowers, ****ing ****ton of ****ing shit mega ultra super awesome blow out your minds asskicking awesome to the ****ton infinite degree plus ****.
By Shens.

In a TV show, and it lasts forever.

 

[Reginald]

Naked lesbian tellytubbies with chainsaws. And a potential love triangle.

Appeals to all demographics.

 

[CyberPitz]

Hl2.net!

>_>

 

[pvtbones]

Mechwarrior/Battletech.

Live Action.

Orgasm.

 

[Stigmata]

Oh man. Good stuff, Sulky.

Okay, this is an idea I've had for more than a year.

I Don't Really Know What to Call This Show Yet
It follows three young men just out of college, with no money, no future, and nothing but degrees in Philosophy. They, despite their University-level logical training, get conned into signing a hilariously expensive lease contract for a very modest house, and have to figure out how they're going to pay the rent if three full-time jobs at minimum wage won't cover it.

The solution?

They moonlight as hitmen.

As their lack of any applicable training for any job whatsoever forces them to bounce from workplace to workplace, they get caught up in an increasingly improbable underground society where everyone's a murderer, nothing is free, and every contract has a non-fulfillment death clause. And all this for a crummy house in the middle of the city...

I'm sure it involves DIY mechwarriors at some point as well.

 

[gick]

Celebrity Battle Royale

BTW, Sulk, thats one of the funniest things I have ever read. You should write for a magazine or a newspaper or something.

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

Smash TV

You know what I mean.

 

[Jangle]

It'd be kind of like a cross between V for Vendetta, Transmetropolitan and Leage of Extroadinary Gentlemen. ie: awesome.

That does actually sound like it would be the best tv show ever. Send the idea to the people who run the telly.

 

[Sulkdodds]

Maybe I will! I doubt they'd do it, though. Which is a shame, because the plot could be all bill and ted time-twisting and the Seven (plus Blake) would need to go back and save other historical figures as well, such as Martin Luther King or Abraham Lincoln.

Stigmata: I love that idea. Maybe it's just because I'm currently playing through Hitman: Blood Money, but still.