Isn't shaking hands strange when you think about it?

[CptStern]

My hands shake a lot. In fact they're usually only steady when I'm writing or drawing.!

here, hold my martini shaker for a few seconds

 

[MuToiD_MaN]

Seriously if someone refused to shake hands with me they're either Howard Hughes or about to be punched.

I'm with Viper. So if you germophobes were to go back in time to 18th century North America and you were offered a smoke from the peace pipe, you'd get your ass killed faster than you could say "I'm sorry, I can't share this with you because I'm a germ-fearing pussy."

 

[Farrowlesparrow]

Time travelling germophobes would be pretty impressive. Although they might end up travelling back and destroying the microbes which we evolved from.

 

[13LACKBISHOP]

Handshakers are always either greedy basterds or dicks with cheesy grins. If I meet a handshaker I know to instinctivly to whip my nose with my hands and sniffle as much as possible. If I get the oppertunity whack of berforehand. Then once you have latched on put your cheesy grin on. That should wipe the smiles of there faces.

Edit

I also suffer from really clamy hands.

 

[SimpleAssassin]

^ Me too, so i try to avoid it most of the time, fortunately the occasion rarely arises and if it does its usually someone i know quite well and i will hug them instead.

 

[Minister]

Handshakes are perfectly normal, but as many have already said, a good one is hard to come by. Women are usually the worst offenders, such limp wrists.

Clapping is weird. I mean, showing your appreciation by slapping your hands together? Who the hell thought of that?

 

[Maestro]

I prefer to hand-shake, and I prefer it when both parties do their damndest to crush the other's hand. I am not satisfied with a handshake unless it entails at least enough pressure to crush walnut between the two hands.

Weak handshakes make me want to kick people in the groin.

Oh, and yeah, clapping is pretty ****ing weird. I hate it.

 

[<RJMC>]

the thing about handshake is

how you know the person didnt faped some seconds ago??!

 

[Dog--]

Is your English getting worse or something?

 

[VirusType2]

When you are raised speaking Spanish, then learn English later, you are pretty much guaranteed to learn to 'get by' instead of absolutely perfecting it.

Did you have trouble understanding what he meant? If not, then what's the difference, if the purpose is communication.

 

[Krynn72]

the thing about rjmc is

how you know he didnt faped while typing?

 

[Dog--]

Well I know that it's not his first language and I'm aware of everything you said, virus, but that was just awful, he's never said anything that weird, it's like he wasn't even trying lol. Like I can easily ignore when he doesn't use punctuation (he uses it but sparingly), but he just used the wrong words completely lol.

 

[bam23]

Paper covers rock, bitch.

 

[Unfocused]

RJMC preferable form of communication is making up dialogues.

Anyway, I don't have anything handshakes and don't find them weird, but as Minister said clapping is weird as ****.

 

[VirusType2]

They used to all making grunting noises, but the mutes were left out, so clapping came into favor.

 

[DEATHMASTER]

niggaz gone insane.

 

[Hurricane]

Oh man, one of my friends gives the best handshake ever. He comes in sideways, squats down, grins, and gives you a sideways hand shake so that instead of looking like this

l
l
l
l

it looks like this.
--------------

He makes the whole thing look natural too! It's quite an experience.

 

[PvtRyan]

Giving no handshake is better than giving one of those pansy weak ass handshakes a lot of people give. Especially women are terrible at handshakes. They often don't even shake hands, they just lay their hand on yours, like they put a dead fish in your hands or something. WTF.

Oh man, one of my friends gives the best handjob ever. He comes in sideways, squats down, grins, and gives you a sideways handjob so that instead of looking like this


l
l
l
l

it looks like this.
--------------

He makes the whole thing look natural too! It's quite an experience.

Yeah..

 

[VirusType2]

I see what you did there.

 

[Krynn72]

Giving no handshake is better than giving one of those pansy weak ass handshakes a lot of people give. Especially women are terrible at handshakes. They often don't even shake hands, they just lay their hand on yours, like they put a dead fish in your hands or something. WTF.

Perhaps most women still expect us to get down on one knee, lightly hold their hand to our mouth and kiss it.



I think im going to do that next time I get a lame handshake from a woman. It will be really weird and uncomfortable so next time she'll actually show some respect and participate in the handshake.

 

[Hurricane]

Yeah..

That's only on wednesdays.

 

[lefty]

Handshakers are always either greedy basterds or dicks with cheesy grins. If I meet a handshaker I know to instinctivly to whip my nose with my hands and sniffle as much as possible. If I get the oppertunity whack of berforehand. Then once you have latched on put your cheesy grin on. That should wipe the smiles of there faces.

Edit

I also suffer from really clamy hands.

Wow you're a dick. I always shake hands because it's ****ing polite. If I met you I'd crush your tiny baby knuckles with my salami fingers.

 

[Viperidae]

I think im going to do that next time I get a lame handshake from a woman. It will be really weird and uncomfortable so next time she'll actually show some respect and participate in the handshake.

...

Or just think you're a tool.

 

[Lucid]

I think that applause is much stranger.

 

[Sheepo]

Well I know that it's not his first language and I'm aware of everything you said, virus, but that was just awful, he's never said anything that weird, it's like he wasn't even trying lol. Like I can easily ignore when he doesn't use punctuation (he uses it but sparingly), but he just used the wrong words completely lol.

Is your English getting worse or something?

 

[Dog--]

Yea, it's the radiation.

 

[highlander]

I like handshaking. Good handshakes are hard to come by.

 

[Maestro]

...

Or just think you're a tool.

Or scream SEXUAL HARASSMENT!

Which she would be totally justified in saying, I mean ****, I would call sexual harassment on that.

 

[Letters]

Giving no handshake is better than giving one of those pansy weak ass handshakes a lot of people give. Especially women are terrible at handshakes. They often don't even shake hands, they just lay their hand on yours, like they put a dead fish in your hands or something. WTF.

You're supposed to kiss it!

Son of a bitch Krynn already said it.

 

[VirusType2]

Am I the only one who doesn't mind if a woman doesn't have a bone crushing grip?

Because I don't want my bone crushed.

 

[Maestro]

Just because they have a bone-crushing grip doesn't mean they'll use it on you, if they're friendly enough to give you a handjob they're not interested in crushing your tool.

 

[Murray]

Shaking hands the first time I meet someone is nothing but polite in my opinion. Never thought there was anything strange about shaking hands, nor does this thread make me think so.

 

[bbson john]

I crush others' palms during handshaking.

 

[Xevrex]

I hate it when people give you the evil grin while they shake your hand and refuse to let go; their grips tighten more and more, until a squeal or grunt is let loose and you beg for mercy; they let go and look down at you with a grandiose feeling, noticing how they have completely dominated you and earned your fear; you shy away impulsively while dwelling on the event that has past, silently hating and mocking your abuser.

 

[YROC]

When I graduated, I had to shake hands on the stage. It was lame. Shaking hands with old guys... Touching wrinkly hands. OH, THA HORRAH!

 

[PJ]

Clapping (Applause) is weirder in my view, as depending on the type of clap the person uses, it can look like a spasm, look like you are punishing your other arm, or, I mean ****, just imagine someone clapping with a cheesy grin. They just look like they should be locked up in a mental home.

Grunts make much more sense. Although it would sound like everyone in the room was jerking off.

 

[dfc05]

I also suffer from really clamy hands.

Honestly, this. It's not that my hands are constantly clammy, it just happens whenever I think about it happening or if I get nervous. Like if I'm playing piano in a public place, my hands are fine if nobody's around, but when someone sits down and listens, my fingers get moist and start slipping. Or if someone wants to compare hand sizes, then it gets pretty bad. Career fairs are the absolute WORST. I hate handshakes .

Hugs are ok though, depending on the person.

 

[Sulkdodds]

How about before shaking anyone's hand you snap on a pair of transparent sanitsed plastic gloves.

 

[VirusType2]

I hate it when people give you the evil grin while they shake your hand and refuse to let go; their grips tighten more and more, until a squeal or grunt is let loose and you beg for mercy; they let go and look down at you with a grandiose feeling, noticing how they have completely dominated you and earned your fear; you shy away impulsively while dwelling on the event that has past, silently hating and mocking your abuser.

This is why it's important to give a firm handshake. There is almost nothing more embarrassing or humbling than having your hand collapse in a handshake. It's happened to me twice and I'll never forget it. Watch out for the really big drunk man so he doesn't catch you off guard.

It's not that my hands are constantly clammy, it just happens whenever I think about it happening or if I get nervous. Like if I'm playing piano in a public place, my hands are fine if nobody's around, but when someone sits down and listens, my fingers get moist and start slipping. .

Maybe stop playing piano and strike up a conversation when someone sits down to listen. When you are completely comfortable around the person, then I'll bet you won't have the problem.

EDIT: Nah, I'm wrong, I used to get nervous when showing even my own family music that I made. It's something you have to deal with in your mind state.

 

[Maestro]

I hate it when people give you the evil grin while they shake your hand and refuse to let go; their grips tighten more and more, until a squeal or grunt is let loose and you beg for mercy; they let go and look down at you with a grandiose feeling, noticing how they have completely dominated you and earned your fear; you shy away impulsively while dwelling on the event that has past, silently hating and mocking your abuser.

Can I shake hands with you?