Life Lately!

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It's not just her. It really does happen with everyone. I don't have a whole lot of social experience, so that, plus my tendency to over-think, plus my lack of self-confidence, plus the fact that it's my girlfriend, equals lots of destructive stress.

[edit] Since you mentioned it, I smoked up last night, and it had the opposite effect I usually get. It turned me into a self-conscious ball of stress. Either I smoked too much, or I haven't been off it for long enough.
 
I prefer the kind of company where there is no stress. Like you can just sit on the porch out in the sun. They are there with you, and you are just enjoying each others company. Words aren't always necessary.

There are other people trust me. Certain people will just click and everything is perfect.


Maybe you should tell her something doesn't feel right. Best thing you can do to change her is to tell her it's not working out for you, even though you want it to.
 
We're on completely different tangents here, this isn't helping :p
 
The best thing I ever learned was how to do comfortable silences.

[edit] I can't take myself seriously with a Dee Dee avatar.
 
Well, I had a chat with my girl about my insecurities. Turns out we're even more similar than I thought.

So I took the opportunity to do something I was previously afraid to do: suggest we have a picnic before the weather turns cold. Things are better :D

Once I'm more settled into this mindset of low insecurity, the next step is to cultivate an appreciation for comfortable silences.
 
Well, I had a chat with my girl about my insecurities. Turns out we're even more similar than I thought.

So I took the opportunity to do something I was previously afraid to do: suggest we have a picnic before the weather turns cold. Things are better :D

Once I'm more settled into this mindset of low insecurity, the next step is to cultivate an appreciation for comfortable silences.

I keep misinterpreting comfortable silences as uncomfortable silences, and going extremely panicy about whether I should be filling them with babble or not.
 
But when you learn how to have and recognise them, they're great. I once spent an hour in town with a friend, not talking. Just walking around and doing stuff.
[edit] Maybe not an hour.
 
You're right, I just need some specific two-tiered consolement.

First: When I'm in a conversation with someone, I feel like I'm under heavy pressure to always respond to the other person with an interesting or humorous comment - as if the goal of conversation is to be constantly conversing - and if I fail to come up with a good comment, I've failed the conversation.

Second: I always draw a blank when I think of what to do when I'm with someone. Whatever my mind settles on, I quickly find some flaw in the idea, like maybe it's not as applicable as it could be to the other person's interests, or I want to do something else more, and based on that I decide the idea is "bad" and forget about it.

Am I really supposed to do the exact opposite of this? Am I supposed to say and do, rather than think?

It's mostly to do with the girl I'm with, but it happens with everyone else to a slightly lesser degree.

I've been doing it for more than a year and I always have a better time amongst people. I'm not sure whether other people enjoy me more or not, but my goal isn't to make myself as pleasing to others as possible. The people I care about still like me so far as I can tell.
 
I've been doing it for more than a year and I always have a better time amongst people. I'm not sure whether other people enjoy me more or not, but my goal isn't to make myself as pleasing to others as possible. The people I care about still like me so far as I can tell.

I've been doing it for about a month now. Sometimes it's still hard to remember what I'm doing and why I'm doing it though, it's not yet second nature to me.
 
First of all- wee willie winkie

Second of all- I need to add a laugh track to Star Wars.

A New Hope was filmed in Anaheim, California in front of a live studio audience!
 
Haha, nice.

Well, I just got home from a fantastic weekend. Hung out with friends, went to a concert and went to a Renaissance festival.
 
I may be seeing amazing girl this Wednesday. Oh how I hope she's there.
 
And conversely, life is boring, but good. Tomorrow I continue my job hunt, or as I like to call it, The Great Canadian City-Wide Employment Trek. It makes me feel important :)
 
Wow, there's a lot of unemployed bums on this forum.

And don't give me that "but I'm only 12!" excuse! lazy bums...

edit:

my balls hurt.
 
Today I ran some errands for my mom, and while walking down the street I looked up to see a McCain 08 sign in an apartment window. To the left, with an arrow pointing right, was a sign that said "HE'S VOTING FOR STUPID!"

Oh how I lol'd.

You have to go back and take a picture and add it to the internet archives.
 
Maybe a friend who is a girl is coming for a sleepover while my parents are out of the country on Thursday.

Maybe.

Just maybe.

I likely won't get in her pants though.
 
Do it. Slice that vagina open with your razor-asian penis. Rasian penis. Raisin.
 
This is ****ing ridiculous.

I bought my friend a 60 dollar DGK deck today for his birthday, and now my mom is yelling at me about it.

I swear to god, i'm out of this ****ing hellhole once I hit 18. I don't care if i'm living in 5x5 room with one window owned by the chinese, i'm not spending a second of time I don't have to living with these two dumbshit women.
 
Hey sinko, where is co05?

No idea. I was put on social lockdown by my mom a little before summer after she found a bunch of pills in my room and some morphine in my car, and I haven't spoken to or messaged him since.
 
If you see him, tell him Uriel <3's him. Maybe his crazy grandma killed him D:
 
If you see him, tell him Uriel <3's him. Maybe his crazy grandma killed him D:

Haha, that woman was awesome.

I remember we were sitting on his basement couch once, stoned out of our minds, playing san andreas, when I turn around and see his grandmas little head poking over the couch, and he sound of what sounded like clothes.

I look at him and go "dude, I think your grandma is getting naked...".

A little later, we heard a loud "SLAM", but ignored it. Then even later, he looked at me and went "uh, where's my grandma?"

"I think she went outside..."

"HOLY SHIT! WE HAVE TO FIND HER!"

She was outside on the side of the road in random formal attire, spouting random dribble about how she had to go to a party.
 
So so so - It's the school holidays as of this morning. And it's currently 10:30 pm, and I'm in bed with a laptop, and I'm gonna play some BF1942. Good times. Two weeks of this! Yeah!
 
Eff you buddy. HSC, HSC. No fun for me.
 
Haha, that woman was awesome.

I remember we were sitting on his basement couch once, stoned out of our minds, playing san andreas, when I turn around and see his grandmas little head poking over the couch, and he sound of what sounded like clothes.

I look at him and go "dude, I think your grandma is getting naked...".

A little later, we heard a loud "SLAM", but ignored it. Then even later, he looked at me and went "uh, where's my grandma?"

"I think she went outside..."

"HOLY SHIT! WE HAVE TO FIND HER!"

She was outside on the side of the road in random formal attire, spouting random dribble about how she had to go to a party.
Classy lady.
 
Today sucks. My IBS is worse than it has been for a long time and I'm getting a cold as well. I feel crap.
 
The week after next is going to be awesome.

Monday: Day Off
Friday: Hand out candy at the zoo to children. I get to dress up as a cardboard robot. Pics will come eventually.
Saturday: protest
 
Girl just slept over at my house.

Didn't get in her pants.
 
Didn't really want to tbh. (TECHNICALLY STUDY SESSION)

She was hyped up on V the whole night anyway. It got pretty scary around 3am when she started muttering to herself.
 
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