my god! i'm so ****ing bored!

jverne

jverne

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everyone's out getting drunk and having sex at tonight's party and i'm sitting here watching documentaries over the net. granted they are interesting docus, but ****, i need some pussy. got totally messed up this Saturday, but something's still missing.


need cheering up :(


and no...porn won't cut it, because every time i touch my penis i get depressed.
 
call up a friend, or just go meet some chicks at the local cafe. hell even go visit friends if they're at work
 
jverne said:
everyone's out getting drunk and having sex at tonight's party and i'm sitting here watching documentaries over the net. granted they are interesting docus, but ****, i need some pussy. got totally messed up this Saturday, but something's still missing.


need cheering up :(


and no...porn won't cut it, because every time i touch my penis i get depressed.
Click to expand...

What documentaries? I love documentaries about cool stuff.

Recently watched a/k/a Tommy Chong and it was great.
 
also if your going to masturbate you should get a webcam and share it with the world.
 
nipples said:
I'll touch your penis, will that cheer you up?
Click to expand...

sure...where do i send it?


Warped said:
call up a friend, or just go meet some chicks at the local cafe. hell even go visit friends if they're at work
Click to expand...

meh...you're probably right. but it's 11PM here so day time activities are out and go picking up chicks alone is kinda weird. i'll invite tomorrow a friend for a shoot of pool or something.
i might even go out with my ultra religious friend to some of their...khm..."activities", should be really interesting.

but for tonight i'm prolly gonna be crying in my room alone.

my newly acquainted flat mate (mate as in the female version) is quite hot (she's vegetarian), but knocking on her door asking if i can stuck my dick up her vagina is just not my style.


Raziaar said:
What documentaries? I love documentaries about cool stuff.

Recently watched a/k/a Tommy Chong and it was great.
Click to expand...

http://www.moviesfoundonline.com/human_footprint.php

Warped said:
also if your going to masturbate you should get a webcam and share it with the world.
Click to expand...

so you can see how pathetically i cry when jerking off? never knew you're into emo porn
 
jverne said:
sure...where do i send it?




meh...you're probably right. but it's 11PM here so day time activities are out and go picking up chicks alone is kinda weird. i'll invite tomorrow a friend for a shoot of pool or something.
i might even go out with my ultra religious friend to some of their...khm..."activities", should be really interesting.

but for tonight i'm prolly gonna be crying in my room alone.

my newly acquainted flat mate (mate as in the female version) is quite hot (she's vegetarian), but i knocking on her door asking if i can stuck my dick up her vagina is just not my style.



http://www.moviesfoundonline.com/human_footprint.php



so you can see how pathetically i cry when i jerk? never knew you're into emo porn
Click to expand...

woah woah WOAH! you have a female in your midst and you aren't even conversing with her?? is she boring?? does she have a boyfriend. dude at least try to talk to her.
 
jverne said:
my newly acquainted flat mate (mate as in the female version) is quite hot (she's vegetarian), but knocking on her door asking if i can stuck my dick up her vagina is just not my style.
Click to expand...

Some vegetarians are quite easy.
 
Warped said:
woah woah WOAH! you have a female in your midst and you aren't even conversing with her?? is she boring?? does she have a boyfriend. dude at least try to talk to her.
Click to expand...

sure i try to. but i have known her for just two days since i moved to my new apartment. and so far i've only talked about school and food. sexual orientation and preferred method of taking a load are scheduled for next week. :p

this day sucks balls...and they're not even MY BALLS!!


what gives a bit of hope is next week i'm going on a date with this girl i met over FB. she's in the near city 50 miles away from me. i hope that doesn't turn out a total day waster.
 
Chat up the hot girl you live with...not someone 50 miles away.
 
seriously, i so ****ing hate my life right now. :|
 
Watch NCIS, cheers me up whenever I'm feeling down.

<3 Abby.
 
Diesel_Power said:
Where's the party?

You should An hero.
Click to expand...

meh...at the dorms. oddly i got invited, but ****ed it up. it's an all mask party and idiot me forgot to take my costume with me, so i improvised and made a smiley on a trash bag as an emergency costume, but decided i'd be too silly. idiot me, it would be so ****ing hilarious when everyone would get drunk.

i just want this day to be nuked into nonexistence.




btw...i've still got 1.5 liters of wine i planned to take there....nah...getting drunk like this would be just utterly depressing.
 
picking up chicks alone is kinda weird.
Click to expand...

Well, don't go picking up chicks alone then. Always go with Mr Chlorofom or Mr Stun Gun.
 
I got some already today, then going out drinking to the bar tonight.

That should make you feel better.
 
Wait wait, you were invited to the party,

you chose not to go,

and now you're depressed that you're not at the party?

...
 
I'm at late night internet class (aka Web Site Development).

AND I'M MEGA BORED TOO.
 
Just knock on the girls door and ask if she wants to hang out, say you are bored. If its a yes, then you have got a foothold, if its a no but definately later, then its a foothold later, if its no im busy, then you are kinda screwed lol.
 
Humans and your constant need for pseudo-procreational activity.
 
I'm totally lost... so you forgot to take your ritalin and went into an alcohol and sex craving rage on a Tuesday night?

Yeeeeah, I just haaaaate it when that happens...
 
Letters said:
I'm totally lost... so you forgot to take your ritalin and went into an alcohol and sex craving rage on a Tuesday night?

Yeeeeah, I just haaaaate it when that happens...
Click to expand...

yeah



yeahchar
 
You don't watch bargain hunt?

You must really hate your life, I feel for you.....honest.
 
jverne said:
btw...i've still got 1.5 liters of wine i planned to take there....nah...getting drunk like this would be just utterly depressing.
Click to expand...
Is it.... vegetarian wine? :naughty:
 
I'm not getting drunk and having sex :( At least not with anyone but myself.
 
Don't worry, everyone at that party is just following the trend of socializing and most of them are probably just doing it to show they are 'cool' to their 'friends' and probably aren't really enjoiyng themselves.

Stick with the Doco's.
 
House parties are usually pretty fun actually. Going to parties at bars/clubs are much more hit and miss though.
 
THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

Blink wildly and then close your eyes really tight for an interesting light show
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
See a variety of blobs, stars and flashes. Try to make out shapes and see if your subconscious is trying to send you a message (perhaps that funny shape is saying, 'send all your money to urban75.com'?)

See how long you can hold a note
(Amusement Potential: 4-20 minutes)
Not that much fun, but it sure passes the time. Play with a friend, or try to beat your own personal best. Inhale deeply and then try and make a noise for as long as you can. Earn extra points for making your partner laugh or ending on an amusing note.

Try to not think about penguins
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
This is especially hard, because by trying too much, you remember what you were trying to avoid thinking of. If you try too little, you end up thinking about penguins anyway.

Use your secret mind power
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Pick a passing by and try to use your mind power to command them do something, like drop their bag or knock into someone. The law of averages dictates that sooner or later one of your mind commands will come true, so you can convince yourself that you really have super human powers and waste even more time trying them out.

Pretend you're a robot
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Walk down the street with mechanical movements, adding 'zzzzzt' sounds with each motion. Pretending to have a motor broken in, say, your left hand can add at least 30 seconds more entertainment.

Scratch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Go ahead, scratch yourself now. Even if nothing itches, go ahead. Doesn't that feel pretty good?

Rate passers by
(Amusement Potential: 10-15 minutes)
Secretly award passers by marks out of ten as you go along, offering (unsaid) expert criticism over their clothing, hairstyle and footwear choices.

Repeat the same word over and over until it loses its meaning
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Pick a random word out of a magazine and say it aloud to yourself until it becomes a meaningless set of noises.

Pinch yourself
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
What is pain? Why is it unpleasant? There's nothing physical about it - it's all in your mind. Plus, after pinching yourself for awhile, boredom will seem nice next to being in pain.

Try to swallow your tongue
(Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes)
There's not much to say about this one. It is possible, but really stupid.

Pretend to be a car
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Make appropriate revving noises in your head as you walk along and add a racing commentary as you pass strangers in the street. Use blinking eyes as indicators for extra authenticity.

Make Star Trek door noises
(Amusement Potential: 1-2 minutes)
Stand by an electric door to a bank or something and make that silly "Scccccccchwop" sound heard whenever people popped on to the bridge to hang with Captain Kirk.

Look at something for awhile, shut eyes, study after image
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
Another great time waster. It takes about 30 seconds of staring to create an after image, and the image is then viewable for about the same length of time. Fun to combine this one with pushing on your eyes.

Get yourself as nauseated as possible
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Best achieved by looking straight up and spinning around. Try to be so dizzy you can't even stand up. This is also entertaining due to the "makes boredom seem a lot better" effect (see "Hurt Yourself").

Invent a weird twitch
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Adopt a bizarre twitch (e.g. flicking your head irregularly, twitching with eye or busting out sporadic cough noises) and try it out when you go shopping.

Make a low buzzing noise
(Amusement Potential: 15-30 minutes)
Hours of fun in libraries! Keeping a totally straight face and looking nonchalant, make a low pitch humming/buzzing noise and see who reacts.

THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH VERY LITTLE

See what's in your neighbour's rubbish/trash
(Amusement Potential: 20-30 minutes)
You can learn a lot about people by what they throw out. You might uncover some dark secret about them. Plus, they might be throwing out something with value that still works, like a VCR or some porn mags.

Watch TV, repeat everything said in Italian accent
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Sort of entertaining. Include flamboyant shoulder shrugs for added impact, or go for a Marlon Brando set of grunts.

Send spooky emails
(Amusement Potential: 15-60 minutes)
Look up someone's CV on the web, do some research on them via Google and then send them an email full of personal references claiming to be an ex-work colleague who fell in love with their shoes. Or something.

Make prank phone calls
(Amusement Potential: 20-60 minutes)
Very entertaining, but requires discipline. Remember - vulgarities don't make a call funny, but getting the other person to believe a ridiculous story will. Try seeing if you can get them to make noises to 'test' the line. One to get you started off: Call McDonalds with weird complaints about their food.

Pretend all humans will die except for people in room with you
Amusement Potential: 10-20 minutes)
What would you do if this really happened? Would the group stay together, or would there be factions? Who would join what group? Remember, there would only be power for a few days before the plants ran out of fuel or broke. To travel, you would always have to be near cars to siphon gas out of. Best to do with people you know.

Step off a curb with eyes shut, imagine it's a cliff
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
To get any benefit out of this one, you have to have a good imagination. Don't step off immediately, build up to the jump. Study the ravine below. Feel the winds at that altitude. Step off and...AHHHHHH!!!!!

Try and sound Welsh
(Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
The key to sounding Welsh is to make sure that your voice goes up at the end of the sentence, so that everything sounds like a question. Throw in a superfluous 'isn't it?' at the end of everything you say and you're halfway there. Isn't it?

Burn things with a magnifying glass
(Amusement Potential: 5-30 minutes)
Ants are always fun to use for this, but burning the face of someone you don't like, under some circumstances, can be just as entertaining.

THINGS YOU CAN DO WITH ANOTHER PERSON

Have a water gargling contest
(Amusement Potential: 5-10 minutes)
Put a glassful of water in your mouth and see how long you can keep gargling for. Award yourself extra points for loud and amusing gargling noises, and minus points if you laugh.

Stare at the back of someone's head until they turn around
(Amusement Potential: 2-5 minutes)
This works on the "I have the feeling I'm being watched" principle. Conduct an experiment-does this really work?

Have a "Who is less competitive" competition
wonder (Amusement Potential: 1-3 minutes)
Trying to win at this will make you lose. Trying to lose makes you win which makes you lose. Not trying at all makes you lose which makes you win which makes you lose.

Pick up a dog so it can see things from your point of view
(Amusement Potential: 3-5 minutes)
Think about it: your dog has only seen the house from a viewpoint from 6" to 2' high (15 to 60 cm for all you metric fans). It's never seen the tops of counters, what you keep on your desk, the tops of shelves, etc. Try looking at things from its point of view, too.

Pull out a hair, stick in someone's ear
(Amusement Potential: 1-5 minutes)
Best done to sleeping people. Added challenge in having no one else around, because then you can't blame it on anyone else. Try to beat your record number of times before the person catches on.

Pour water in hand, make sneeze noise, throw water on back of person's neck
(Amusement Potential: 5-15 minutes)
Always a good gag. For an even bigger reaction out of the person, act like you're not sorry at all for what they think you did. Comment instead on how big that sneeze was or about how there was a lot of mucus in that one.
Click to expand...
Few of my own:

Sound out riffs/solos from songs with your mouth
(Amusement Potential: 2-10 minutes per song)
Bew wah wa woooooo! It's fun sometimes.

Pretend your on a secret mission
(Amusement Potential: 5-20 minutes)
Pretend you have to get an object (say a pencil) to the other side of your house without anyone seeing you, and also get back.

See how high you can count
(Amusement Potential: Depends on when you give up)
Betcha can't count past 500.


They are all equally fun.

Here's more, but they are not in quite nice of a format.
 
You're just going to end up masturbating to porn in the end, anyway.
 
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