hydrometeor
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- Jul 26, 2007
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A few hours ago I came home after a long night with the boys Now, let me start from the beginning here. I want to show you all that it's the bitch's fault for it.
On Christmas day we recatipulated and decided to give our children a present after all; we bought them a small puppy, to teach them responsibility for when they grew up to become housewives and eventually take care of a man. It was a cute little dachsund, with big brown eyes and a rascal look to its face. They loved him and wanted to name him Barker, but that was too close to Bob Barker, and good Christians forbid gambling, so we decided on Abraham instead.
However, little did I know that dog had Satan in him.
I came home late at night, perhaps 1AMish, and was a bit tired and grouchy. Grouchy from being up at night. I had trouble parking my car due to the intense cold and me being tired, so I walked in the house a bit peeved and everything was find. Until I saw a heap of warm dog shit right under where a crucfix was hanged on the wall.
I was angry -- this damned little mutt was sending me a message, an anti-Christian one. Now, I've never trusted dogs much. They're beasts, and you know what the bible says about that, and you never know with the end times being so near. It was my wife who convinced me to get him, and for giving in I deserve punishment from The Lord, but anyways I screamed and shouted, and stomped around throwing things over and knocking over tables looking for the little rat. My family screamed at me to stop, but I would not relent. I was an angry God-fearing man set to banish this evil from my house.
I found the rodent under my daughter's bed, with its pathetic shuddering and its tail under it's stupid legs, with piss dripping from it. Clearly the demon knew it had gone overbored in its profanity of christ. I grabbed it by the scuff of its neck and brought it out into the living room, where my alarmed family awaited.
I grabbed the beast by its hind legs, and swung it, and smashed its pitiful head agains the porcelean coffee table with all my strength. Upon impact, it made a terrific squealing sound and blood leaked from its ears mouth and nose. I threw the seizing animal on the carpet and said, "no beast of satan will reside in my home while I am the head of the household." The dog died in about a minute or two while my family watched on.
My wife, clearly distraught over thinking the animal's life mattered, and that is had a soul, gathered my crying daughters and drove away in her SUV to who knows where. She later called me up on my cell and told me she was filing for divorce and a restraining order.
Please pray for me and my future custody battle with my wife. I'll go through every legal hoop to make sure I'll get my daughters.
On Christmas day we recatipulated and decided to give our children a present after all; we bought them a small puppy, to teach them responsibility for when they grew up to become housewives and eventually take care of a man. It was a cute little dachsund, with big brown eyes and a rascal look to its face. They loved him and wanted to name him Barker, but that was too close to Bob Barker, and good Christians forbid gambling, so we decided on Abraham instead.
However, little did I know that dog had Satan in him.
I came home late at night, perhaps 1AMish, and was a bit tired and grouchy. Grouchy from being up at night. I had trouble parking my car due to the intense cold and me being tired, so I walked in the house a bit peeved and everything was find. Until I saw a heap of warm dog shit right under where a crucfix was hanged on the wall.
I was angry -- this damned little mutt was sending me a message, an anti-Christian one. Now, I've never trusted dogs much. They're beasts, and you know what the bible says about that, and you never know with the end times being so near. It was my wife who convinced me to get him, and for giving in I deserve punishment from The Lord, but anyways I screamed and shouted, and stomped around throwing things over and knocking over tables looking for the little rat. My family screamed at me to stop, but I would not relent. I was an angry God-fearing man set to banish this evil from my house.
I found the rodent under my daughter's bed, with its pathetic shuddering and its tail under it's stupid legs, with piss dripping from it. Clearly the demon knew it had gone overbored in its profanity of christ. I grabbed it by the scuff of its neck and brought it out into the living room, where my alarmed family awaited.
I grabbed the beast by its hind legs, and swung it, and smashed its pitiful head agains the porcelean coffee table with all my strength. Upon impact, it made a terrific squealing sound and blood leaked from its ears mouth and nose. I threw the seizing animal on the carpet and said, "no beast of satan will reside in my home while I am the head of the household." The dog died in about a minute or two while my family watched on.
My wife, clearly distraught over thinking the animal's life mattered, and that is had a soul, gathered my crying daughters and drove away in her SUV to who knows where. She later called me up on my cell and told me she was filing for divorce and a restraining order.
Please pray for me and my future custody battle with my wife. I'll go through every legal hoop to make sure I'll get my daughters.
