The Complete Military History of France

[MilkMan12]

American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting." - Bullshit

World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline. - Bullshit

World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song. - Bullshit.


I presume it was written by a biased American with no liking of France.

France saved the English colonists in America, who were moaning about taxes even though they had taxes 50times lower then the UK mainland taxes.

The French and English empires fight the Germanic empire in World War 1, America arrives just intime to clear up.

The French and English empires fight Germany and Italy in World War 2, America arrives half way through and claims sole victory.

Or should we look at American victories, has America ever won a war on their own without anyone elses help? Vietnam? no, American Revolution? no...

He is half right. America was extremely isolationist at the time of both wars. They didnt get involved until Garmanies unristricted submarine warfare policy is responsible for the sinking of a ship that had many Americans on it and a stupid letter saying that Germany would help spain defeat America got leaked out.

But to contradict you America never claimed "sole victory". Not only that but you are talking as if both wars could have done without America. Thats outright stupid. Without America the allies would have never won either war...period.

Also if you guys wanna read about something funny about the French during WW2 look up something called The Maginot Line. Even my history teacher calls this the godamn stupidest thing ever. Its pretty ****ing funny how easy it was for Germany to cross the border then come up right behind this one defense base that became useless once World War 1 had ended yet they continued to focus all their time money and troops to.

Also cant forget Petain bowing down to the Nazis and settling for Vichy.

 

[Razor]

Why is it so hard for you to believe that France actually did win battles, do you have some kind of personal hatred against them? Did a Frenchman have sex with your mum and then abandon her with a baby?

 

[Razor]

He is half right. America was extremely isolationist at the time of both wars. They didnt get involved until Garmanies unristricted submarine warfare policy is responsible for the sinking of a ship that had many Americans on it and a stupid letter saying that Germany would help spain defeat America got leaked out.

But to contradict you America never claimed "sole victory". Not only that but you are talking as if both wars could have done without America. Thats outright stupid. Without America the allies would have never won either war...period.

Also if you guys wanna read about something funny about the French during WW2 look up something called The Maginot Line. Even my history teacher calls this the godamn stupidest thing ever. Its pretty ****ing funny how easy it was for Germany to cross the border then come up right behind this one defense base that became useless once World War 1 had ended yet they continued to focus all their time money and troops to.

Also cant forget Petain bowing down to the Nazis and settling for Vichy.

Roosevelt and the idiot who followed him in the White House didn't claim sole victory, but a lot of American's do.

If America hadn't invaded, the war would of probably come to a stalemate, they didn't have the resources, the ships or the airpower to invade England, so they would of most probably focused a lot more troops and men against the Soviet Union, possibly crushing them and meeting up with Japan coming in from the East. Japan would of continued west and south, attempting to invade India and Australia, they most probably wouldn't of gotten far though. And even when German Uboats were operating 10 miles off the American coast sinking non-military American ships, America still just stood by and twiddled their thumbs...

 

[el Chi]

Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

Arrogant wankers.
All this "cheese-eating surrender monkeys" stuff is such childish bullsh*t. There's no need for it, but people perpetuate it when France don't agree with them - f*cking "freedom fries" nonsense.
This has actually made me quite angry. Some people really need to get over themselves, for Christ's sake.

 

[kmack]

You mean he commanded france to a crushing defeat. new age selective history.

First off, you sum up Napoleans career by saying "he commanded France to a crushing defeat" then say that IM THE ONE USING "NEW AGE SELECTIVE HISTORY"
i dont know which (your stupidity or hypocrisy) is making my head spin worse.

so under this insultive retard-history, i guess the roman empire was just an empire built for a while that eventually collapsed. real smart argument there :dozey:.

no, its deceptive to say someone led a country to great victories when they were annihilated. not to mention that majority of the people fighting under him werent french.

how is that deceptive at all? nothing i said was untrue, and again are you trying to compromise the military history of napolean based on an ultimate defeat? how about most of our greatest generals? god you teenyboppers learning anything in highschool?

just shut up, please.

 

[KoreBolteR]

all stereotyping in this thread.

the only difference between most countries in this world today is the languages.

not including some minor less economically developed countries..

but most of them are taking up the western life.. look at japan and china for one!

 

[ModerateCentrist]

France's greatest general was a foreigner, their greatest warrior was a teenage girl, and their last great military victory came on the plains of Wagram in 1809.

 

[Doug]

France is a great nation, and an integral part of Western Civilization. Anyone even half-educated ought to be able to name a dozen great French novelists, painters, mathematicians, scientists and philosophers.

The French were the master warriors of Europe right up until 1815. French valor at Verdun -- Google it if you don't know anything about it -- set a standard which I doubt a single person posting to this board could even dream of emulating.

The French had the stuffing knocked out of them by WWI, and divisive internal struggles during the 1930s didn't help. Communists and fascists helped sabotage her war effort in 1940, but despite that, 130,000 Frenchmen died fighting the Nazis. (250,000 Americans died during the whole war.)

There was little resistance to the Nazis during their occupation, as elsewhere in Europe, including in the British Channel Islands, except by the Communists (whose real motherland had not been conquered).

France is now trying to deal with five million disaffected Muslim immigrants, who suffer high unemployment because of France's sluggish, statist economy, the product of fifty years of voting themselves a Free Lunch.

But there is hope: watch for the rise of a man named Nicolas Sarkozy.

We must hope that France will in the future rejoin the struggle against the Islamist enemies of civilization. (But if this happens, if you will read a bit about the struggle for Algeria, you will see why we cannot leave them in charge of Arab prisoners.)

 

[kmack]

France's greatest general was a foreigner, their greatest warrior was a teenage girl, and their last great military victory came on the plains of Wagram in 1809.

joan of arc must be your hero

anyways, id have to say that your average french soldier has done more than you ever will.

it is wrong to stereotype like that. but you are just a troll

 

[superjuanchango]

I read this a while ago, and it is just as funny now. Thirty Years War and French Revolution are my personal favorites.

 

[MilkMan12]

The maginot line is more than enough to put France in the "you get made fun of forever that is so bad". SO we can make fun of France all we want

 

[gh0st]

130,000 Frenchmen died fighting the Nazis. (250,000 Americans died during the whole war.)

Yeah, the only difference is we died running toward the enemy them and they died fleeing.

 

[Foxtrot]

Yeah, the only difference is we died running toward the enemy them and they died fleeing.

hahahahaha

 

[MilkMan12]

Yeah, the only difference is we died running toward the enemy them and they died fleeing.

Not funny it is actually true. A lot of that 130,000 died in a rescue effort by the British navy. I forgot what the rescue was called it had a very popular name. I guess that makes me stupid...

 

[el Chi]

Not funny it is actually true. A lot of that 130,000 died in a rescue effort by the British navy. I forgot what the rescue was called it had a very popular name. I guess that makes me stupid...

Not as stupid as the people on here, crying hilarity on the French, for no very good reason, about things that happened before they (most of them) were even sperm, let alone able to conceive of the deeply-ingrained petty xenophobia that they now spew so zealously.

 

[seinfeldrules]

Not funny it is actually true. A lot of that 130,000 died in a rescue effort by the British navy. I forgot what the rescue was called it had a very popular name. I guess that makes me stupid...

Dunkirk is what I believe you are looking for at first glance.

 

[Foxtrot]

Not as stupid as the people on here, crying hilarity on the French, for no very good reason, about things that happened before they (most of them) were even sperm, let alone able to conceive of the deeply-ingrained petty xenophobia that they now spew so zealously.

I forgot, you can't laugh at somthing unless you hate it.

 

[el Chi]

I forgot, you can't laugh at somthing unless you hate it.

Fair point, but I still think that a lot of the France-bashing really is needless and more than occasionally motivated by pettiness.
Whatever.

 

[Pesmerga]

Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

Haha.

I remember a story, not quite sure of any sources, during WWII told by my JROTC teacher two years ago. He explained that the United States granted France a hell of a depot of tanks and weaponry, whilst Germany laughed at the deal and invaded shortly thereafter, completely wiping out the arsenal even though France had a great deal of time to deploy the vehicles.

Simply put, France is not a warlike country. They have little experience in fighting, and I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but their position geographically makes them a 5th wheel and has primarily acted as an "injured cat", protecting them just because we can. Unlike Switzerland, which has been a nuetral country in almost all history because of their geographic position, France is a bump in the road.

Again, not being involved in war is nice; thinking you can sit in the middle of it while drinking wine and eating cheese is not wise :<.

 

[seinfeldrules]

Fair point, but I still think that a lot of the France-bashing really is needless and more than occasionally motivated by pettiness.

Fair point, but I still think that a lot of the American-bashing really is needless and more than occasionally motivated by pettiness

 

[MilkMan12]

Not as stupid as the people on here, crying hilarity on the French, for no very good reason, about things that happened before they (most of them) were even sperm, let alone able to conceive of the deeply-ingrained petty xenophobia that they now spew so zealously.

Umm sorry but the Maginot Line ALONE is an UNBELIEVABLY good reason. I swear to God I almost crapped my pants as I learned about this. Seriously you guys, either let me know if your lazy and I will tell you about it or look it up at a more credible source.

 

[Feath]

Umm sorry but the Maginot Line ALONE is an UNBELIEVABLY good reason. I swear to God I almost crapped my pants as I learned about this. Seriously you guys, either let me know if your lazy and I will tell you about it or look it up at a more credible source.

Hmm, I don't believe it's as stupid as you think. I mean, at the time it was a great idea, given the sucess of the static defences in World War I. When Germany invaded France, they had to go through the Ardennes, which was pretty unthinkable at the time because of the effort involved. Not to mention the way that Germany combined their forces to invade quickly.

It certainly wasn't just a stupid thing, and it did prevent a direct German invasion. And I don't think anyone should "crap their pants" over this. I'm sure that in Hindsight, you can see the flaws, but only because we know the ingenuity of the German Army now.

 

[el Chi]

Fair point, but I still think that a lot of the American-bashing really is needless and more than occasionally motivated by pettiness

I was waiting for someone to say that

 

[Razor]

Dunkirk is what I believe you are looking for at first glance.

Yes, it was called Operation Dynamo.

 

[MilkMan12]

Hmm, I don't believe it's as stupid as you think. I mean, at the time it was a great idea, given the sucess of the static defences in World War I. When Germany invaded France, they had to go through the Ardennes, which was pretty unthinkable at the time because of the effort involved. Not to mention the way that Germany combined their forces to invade quickly.

It certainly wasn't just a stupid thing, and it did prevent a direct German invasion. And I don't think anyone should "crap their pants" over this. I'm sure that in Hindsight, you can see the flaws, but only because we know the ingenuity of the German Army now.

Do you know much about it? And how much resources went into it?

To sum it up heres a pic. I dunno how to my it bigger so that red line which represents Frances border should be A LOT taller. The red is Frances border once again. The Blue is the maginot line. The orange is the Nazis.

http://img86.echo.cx/my.php?loc=img86&image=maginotline1iz.jpg

This should help you get the gist of it.

 

[Feath]

Do you know much about it? And how much resources went into it?

To sum it up heres a pic. I dunno how to my it bigger so that red line which represents Frances border should be A LOT taller. The red is Frances border once again. The Blue is the maginot line. The orange is the Nazis.

http://img86.echo.cx/my.php?loc=img86&image=maginotline1iz.jpg

This should help you get the gist of it.

Your picture doesn't appear to work.

 

[MilkMan12]

How do I make it work?

 

[Tr0n]

How do I make it work?

By using magic.

 

[Edcrab]

French magic.

I don't really hold anything against the country. Admittedly some of the most irritating, impolite and annoying people I have ever met are Frenchmen, but I know plenty of British gits too, so it balances out.

The fact that everyone's beaten them in combat at one point is neither here nor there...