The Grunt Chronicles: Flight 67

[Acepilotf14]

Grunt: Hey, anyone know whats going on?
Grunt2: Eh... commander promised me 500,000 dollars and a beer when I get back.
Grunt3: Right.. He promised me 600,000!
Grunt2: THAT PIECE OF SH**!!!!
Grunt: Erm.... right...
Assassin: Is the nu... I mean, is the potato chip bag still on board?
Grunt2: Yep!
Assassin: Good..... Good....
Grunt4: STFU!! THERES POTATO CHIPS?
Pilot: Were almost there.
Grunt: Where are we going...?
Grunt2: Commander told me a strip club.
Grunt4: Freakin awesome.
Pilot: Were going to black mesa..
Grunt: Like from that game half-life?
Grunt2: Dude...
Grunt3: Sh**.
Grunt4: Were not going to a strip club?
Pilot: Err.. yeah... We are!!
Grunt2: Whateva.. lemme get my PSP out...
Grunt: You have a PSP? Thats not spose to be out for like... 15 freakin years!
Grunt3: Haxx0r...
Grunt1: OH.. awesome! Im grunt1 now!
Grunt3: Soemone get me my anti-hack.
Grunt2: ...err..
Grunt4: Everyone just stfu! Im trying to play my xbox 360..
Grunt3: Is EVERYONE a hacker?
Pilot: Who took my speed hack?
Assassin: ...Not me...
Pilot: Grr...
Grunt: How much longer tell we get to see some babes? Wait.. grr.. im not Grunt1 anymores!!!
Pilot: 27 hours.
Grunt: God... this psot is gonig to go on forever, isnt it?
Grunt3: You spelled going wrong.
Grunt: I didnt! its Gonig!!
Grunt3: Don't worry. simple noob mistake.
Grunt: Ive got like 50 posts under my belt!!!!
Grunt3: 10,585.
Grunt: Your all hackers...
--TO BE CONTINUED!!!--
26 Hours Later.
Grunt4: -snore-
Grunt2: These chips are really good... what brand are they?
Pilot: Explodey chips.(Copyrighted that one guy.)
Grunt2: Hm... can I have sum more?
Assassin: No.
Pilot: 1 Hour ETA!
Grunt: What does ETA mean?
Pilot: Extreme Total Assassination.
Grunt: yeah... right...
Grunt2: So... ASL all?
All: JESUS NO!
Grunt2: 16/F/CA!!!!
Grunt: THROW HIM OFF!!!
Grunt4: Egh..
Assassin: Who turned off the AC?
Grunt: Not me.
Grunt2: -cough-
Grunt3: Pikachu did it!
Pikachu: Pika?
Pilot: Okay, who brought a pikachu?
Pikachu: Pika....chu! PIKA!!!
Pilot: Give it a chip!
Grunt: Right...
-Gives chip-
Pikachu: Yummm
-explodes-
Grunt: OMFGWTFBBQOMGWEALLGOINGTODIE!!!!
All: ?????
Pilot: Roger.. Tango sighted...
All: ??????????????
Pilot: Were landing.
Grunt2: Hey, whats that big bloody thing over there?
-TO BE CONTINUED (AGAIN)-
26 Minutes Later.
Grunt: Hey, anyone have a camera? THIS THING IS AWESOME! ITS TRING TO EAT MY HEAD!
Grunt2: Sure we shouldnt try to take it off?
Grunt: Dude, its like a head-gasm!!!
Grunt3: Too much information.
Pilot: OIH JESUS ITS SLASHING MY HEAD I OH MY GOD SOEMONE SHOOT ITS HEAD OFF!!! aAGJASJETAHCFGJHDFSHs
Grunt: NOT NOW!!! Anyways... jack is just palying..
Grunt3: Playing.
Grunt: ....
Pilot: CAN SOMEONE GIVE ME A.. OH JESUS.... WTF IS THAT THING? OH DEAR LORD~!!!!!!!!! -gagh-
Grunt2: I think we should call them a.. headcrab. Cause they is all cute and looks like a crab. they like my head.
Headcrab: -drool-
Grunt: Oh, oh, remember that.. shephard guy? Oh my god.. that guy was hilarious.. im gonna call him..
Grunt3: You have a phone?
Grunt: Yeah. a razr.
Grunt2: Hax...
Pilot: OAEHSRDTHNADTIIIIBERIAJHIERAJHIERJHDFSJHOASJESUSOMFGNOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Grunt: Shut up..
Grunt2: Do it!
-ring- ring- ring-

Grunt: Hey.. Adrian? Its Grunt. Yeah.. YOU HAVE BOOBIES!
-closes phone-
All: HAHAHA!!!
Pilot: GLAJHAHRGLEGLARHGLE!
Zombie: rawr!
Grunt: Oh, hey jack. Dont with Pilot?
Zombie: Rawr.
Grunt: Oh, you want sum more chips?
Grunt3: Some.
Grunt: ...
-hands chips to zombie-
Zombie: RAWR!!!!
-devours chips through maw-
Grunt: That was sort of disturbing.
-Zombie ASPLODES!-
Grunt2: Oh jesus.
Grunt3: Freakin sw33t.
Grunt4: lawlwllwlwlwlw!
Pilot: OH THANK GOD! get me a medic... plz...
Grunt: We brought a medic?
Pilot: Shi*.
Grunt: Oh hey! Its Jack's friends!!!!
Zombie(s): gurgle.
Grunt2: These guys are starting to freak me out..
Grunt3: Hold on.. let me get my strategy guide..
Grunt2: Hehehe.. they tickle..
Grunt3: Okay.. to kill them, all we have to do is shoot them in the head.
Grunt4: Obvious much?
Grunt: Ill try first!
-bang-
Grunt2: Jesus Christ Grunt! HE WAS 2 FEET AWAY!
Grunt: Im lagging.
All: ........................................
Grunt3: Well.. all they do is 10 damage, so they arent very threatening...
Grunt: How much HP do we have?
Grunt3: Hmm.. okay so we are level 4 Warriors.. and grunt is a level 3 Warrior.. So... about 15...
Grunt: D:
Zombie uses Limit Break!
15 15 15 15
Grunt4 Dodged!
Grunt4 uses SMG!
99999999999999999999 9999999999999999999999 999999999999999999999 9999999999999999999999
Grunt: HAX!!!!
Grunt4: STFU!
99999999999999999999
Grunt: -PAUSE- -Gamer Card section.. okay.. Grunt4...
-Presses FILE REPORT-
-Writes in 5898448934 word essay about how he should be banned...-
-INTERNAL ERROR 3357-
-FATAL ERROR-
-REBOOTING-
-PRESS F5 FOR USER OPTIONS-
Grunt: :0
-TO BE CONTINUED!!(once again!)

 

[Azner]

uugh...

 

[hungryduck]

interesting?

how does one vocalize "OMFGWTFBBQOMGWEALLGOINGTODIE!!!!" anyway?

 

[Acepilotf14]

Hmm...oh-mefeg-watif-BBQ-ohmge-we-all-going-to-die!!!!

 

[OneoftheLost]

Well its an original idea at least.
Not my style, but im certain some will enjoy it.

Overall points for effort and originallty.

 

[Acepilotf14]

Hooray! Indeed, I made the first part up on the spot cause some people were discussing how grunts were told about BM. So I made that showing how F'ing clueless they were.

 

[hungryduck]

Hmm...oh-mefeg-watif-BBQ-ohmge-we-all-going-to-die!!!!

interesting.

 

[bigburpco]

This is fun.

 

[marco900]

kewl

 

[Atomic_Piggy]

This is the first thing I read here after spending a week in Cyrodill and its funny as hell.

 

[Acepilotf14]

I feel all fuzzy and happy inside.

Updates:

I have named all the episodes...
Chapter 1: Osprey 67.
Chapter 2: 27 Hours Later...
Chapter 3: Zombie Madness!
Chapter 4: Counter-Strike Calamaties.

I am planning on making short 1 panel comics starring the Grunt & Crew

 

[Acepilotf14]

Continued from Part 3...
Grunt: Hey guys! I leveled up!
Grunt3: Whatd it say?
Grunt: It said +1 XP!!!
Grunt2: That means you just got an XP, not a level.
Grunt: How much XP do I need to level up?
Grunt4: 500.
Grunt: GOD DAMN*T!
Grunt2: How did you get the xp anyway?
Grunt: Erm..
10 Seconds Later.
Grunt4: JESUS ITS DRILLED INTO MY MIND FOREVER!
Grunt2: Mommy.. mommy...
Grunt3: -silence-
Grunt: .....Act like men!!!!
Grunt: Hello?
Grunt: Hellllllllllllloooooooooooo?
-3 Shots are fired-
Grunt: That outta wake em up.
Grunt: ...oh.... oops..
29 minutes later...
CT: Lock and Load men!
Grunt: Woah.. where am I?
CT: DEI nub!!!!!............................ T (Headshot) CT
T: LAWLALALALALAWLWALWLALWA
CT: HE HAZ TEH AIM HAXC!!!
Grunt: Wow... so.. untrained...
T: WHO IZ DIS NUOOB?
CT: LOL I MAK BOOBIES!!! ( .Y. )
T: THAT IS TEH SWEETS!
Grunt: This is weird.. my words are floating to the top of teh screen..
End Round. T - 67 CT - 0
CT: JOIN MEH TEAM HE IZ HAXX0R!!!
Grunt: K.
CT: N0w we WILL WIN!!!
T: l0l. N00b............................ T (Headshot) CT
CT: OMFG!!~! ........................... T (Headshot) Grunt
Grunt: I am.. dead?
CT: Lock and Load men.
Grunt: WOAH! I AM ALIVE!
CT: GET A AWP!!!!
Grunt: ... right...
Grunt: Da*n. This thing is heavy...
CT: WTF?
T: no more caps loks.
CT: WHY SHOULD I?
T: i m admin/ ................................... T (Headshot) CT
CT: OMFG>>>> ................................... T (Headshot) Grunt
Grunt: This is gay.. ................................... Grunt has left.
CT: RIGHT.. N00B!!!
T: i will invite him bak..
-You have recieved a PM-
T: really? awesopmes.
Dear T:
F*ck you.
Love, Grunt.
P.S. Dont go into teh bathroom.
-TO BE CONTINUED!-