Video games made me...

ríomhaire

ríomhaire

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Pokemon made me stuff helpless animals into air-tight balls!
Sim City made me call down an alien invasion on New York!
Deus Ex made me shove 2 pound canisters up my ass in order to upgrade!
GTA San Andreas made me kill everything purple!
Street Fighter 2 made me smash up my neighbours' cars for points!
Wolfenstein 3D made me eat dog-food!
Black and White made me try to teach my dog to throw fire-balls!
 
Video games made me read this thread... and now, I hate them.
 
Resident Evil made me beat bushes to death with a stick in the woods with a friend while touching only the rocks on the ground with our feet.
 
Halo made me put sticky bombs on my car so I could do jumps.
 
The Sims made me eat hamburgers and become a heavy lard ass.
 
Quake made me EVIL, I thank it for that.
 
Mario made me crush shelled reptiles under my feet.
Pac Man made me pop pills and hungrily chase after children on Halloween.
Half-Life made me adminsister medication by standing on fragile first-aid kits.
Dungeon Siege made me force hardware down a donkey's throat.
Baldur's Gate had me staring in a mirror for hours until I re-rolled a decent character specification.
Counter Strike had me bunny hopping to work.
Red Alert made me phobic of Christmas trees.
Torment made me start a diary on my back.
Sonic made me spin hedgehogs in an effort to break the sound barrier.
Star Wars made me a nerd.
 
Half-life 2 made me throw biozeminades at people.
 
Battlefield 2 made me try to take out my neighbors that are iraqi (or afgani i cant tell)...we're not talking atm...
 
This thread made several kittens die.

But, It also made me lmao.
Good stuff.
 
xlucidx said:
This thread made several kittens die.

But, It also made me lmao.
Good stuff.
Click to expand...
no its masterbation that kills teh kitties
 
xlucidx said:
This thread made several kittens die.

But, It also made me lmao.
Click to expand...
Kamikazie said:
no its masterbation that kills teh kitties
Click to expand...
Wait... So, if that's true, then how did the kittens --

Oh, GOD, xlucidx, what were you doing when you read this thread?
 
Postal 2 MADE me piss in someone's face, and then it MADE me lop their head off with a shovel when they were puking, then it MADE me watch a fountain of sick come out of their neck and then it MADE me watch it turn to blood.
 
Murray_H said:
Postal 2 MADE me piss in someone's face, and then it MADE me lop their head off with a shovel when they were puking, then it MADE me watch a fountain of sick come out of their neck and then it MADE me watch it turn to blood.
Click to expand...

Strange. Postal 2 taught me to douse random members of my town in gas and then set them on fire. It also made taught me to kick my dog.
 
Killer 7 made me cut people up into chunks :(
 
Alien versus Predator 2 made me run around on walls and ceilings and bite the head of people, and afterwards I'd dice their courpse and feel great about it.
 
Syndicate Wars made me replace my legs so i could run faster.
Serious Sam made me keep my trigger-finger perminantly held down.
Morrowind made me always jump down hills so i'd get better at jumping.
Theme Hospital made me develop known cures for unknown diseases.
The Worms series of games made me talk in a high-pitch voice.
 
Murray_H said:
Postal 2 MADE me piss in someone's face, and then it MADE me lop their head off with a shovel when they were puking, then it MADE me watch a fountain of sick come out of their neck and then it MADE me watch it turn to blood.
Click to expand...
Sign the petition Damnit, I got stuff to do.

Omfg, I love that game.

Solitare made me clone my deck of cards so I can create a 5,3412,769 card pickup in a small area!
Starcraft made me collect vicious dogs only to have them chase after people while they scream "NO RUSH 10 MIN!"
RollerCoaster Tycoon made me create nice roller coasters with a big gap in the middle, then ran the ride....
Halo made me commit suicide.
Total Annihlation made me go into the army so I could send my commander into the enemy base so I could shoot him in an attempt to destroy the base with ease.
Stepmania made me crash my car multiple times in a month because I'm busy doing the keyboard beats on my steering wheel!
Diablo 2 taught me how to kill people then loot their gold coins!
 
Dragonrealms made me an excellent wordsmith.
 
Beerdude26 said:
World Of Warcraft made me spread AIDS.
Click to expand...
No, that was being an opposing medic on Team Fortress Classic.
 
Video games enhanced my creativity and lit a fire of passion to make games that I doubt will ever be quenched.

Oh noes, I've been brainwashed.
 
Ennui said:
Video games enhanced my creativity and lit a fire of passion to make games that I doubt will ever be quenched.

Oh noes, I've been brainwashed.
Click to expand...
Oh great, you just threw away the sarcasm :frown:
 
Mario set me out on a life of psychoactive mushroom eating. Now I run through strange pipe dreams stepping on brown psilocybin mushrooms and eating polka dotted fly-agaric shrooms tripping my balls off and dreaming of a peach.
 
Half-life 2 made me want to detroy every piece of wood I saw to expierience dynamic breakpoints.
Quake3 made me blow myself up with a rocketlauncher trying to jump up the house.
Counter-strike made me pull out a knife when I ran.
Soldat made me jump when I tried to run up a hill.
Tomb-raider made me step forward, step backward, duck, stand up, turn around three times and jump backwards to get weapons.
Urban Terror made me shoot people's legs as much as I could without killing them, having them bleed to death.
 
Halflife2, Civilization, and other RTSes made me want to conquer the world.

Really.
 
ZoE2 made me want to design a giant mecha named "Anubis" and eradicate the entire bloody UNIVERSE!
 
I ignored Murray_H's body and Soldner ruined my sphincter.

Oh, and Tomb Raider made me wanna have boobs
 
C-S has turned me into a mean lean killing machine.
 
Ninja Gaiden made me want to steal people's staplers from their offices, whilst in ninja garb.
Def Jam: Fight for New York City made me wanna beat the shit out of Snoop Dogg even more.
Sonic made me rob a jewellery store
Mario made me take shrooms.
Contra made me think that pressing Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start would solve all my problems.
Far Cry makes me think all mercenaries are apart of a single consciousness.
Katamari Damacy maked me roll every single living/non-living thing into a giant ball.
Curse of Monkey Island made me put seemingly useless items into my pants, only to combine them into something great and useful later on.
Tony Hawk's Pro Skater made me think i could defy gratify and suffer only minor scrapes after falling off skyscrapers.
DigDug taught me i could dig like a mother****er.
 
Counter-Strike help me a ton in real life.

(I think i have like the only positive comment)
 
Battlefield 2 made me crash a 747.
Sonic made me spin signs whenever I ran past them.
Tribes made me skie down mountains using only my shoes.
Dungeon Keeper made me wear tight pants.
Dark Reign made me to try and pay my bills with water.
Max Payne taught me to dive around corners.
System Shock taught me to hack vending machines.
 
Doom 3 made me afraid of mirrors. (no, seriously... :eek:)
Unreal Tournament taught me to shoot thermonuclear warheads at peoples feet.
Burnout made me drive on the wrong side of the road at 300 miles per hour- without a front lisence plate! :O
Riddick taught me to step on peoples nads.
Starcraft made me blow up furry animals by poking them.
Worms made me run away from bouncing sheep.
AvP 2 made me start my own human skull collection.
Half-Life 2 made me a loser with no social life :(.
 
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