When reality spits in your face...

[HunterSeeker]

Halflife2.net is not really a good place to ask for advice (Kill yourself lol!), but I am feeling down and pretty much need to get this off my chest.

I have a physical disability known as CMT or HSMN. The symptoms I am suffering from is a little reduced sense of touch, very weak muscles, very bad sense of balance and worst of all: Very little energy. I get tired extremly easy.

This disability has never been fun to have off cource, but I managed to get through 12 years of studies with pretty good grades as well. I am now studying IT at Chalmers School of Technology. That dosent work out however. They require significantly more dedication to studies then I am used to, coupled with me moving away from my parents.

Its simply to much for me, my life does not work for me. I simply get to tired to do what I need to do. My apartments looks like shit and I am behind in my studies (and god knows I want to finish this education), so much Im pretty sure I wont be able to cath up, this also makes me feel very stressed which makes it difficult for me to get any sleep (which is why I am here 03:40, I went to bed 22:00). I also have too little energy to have a life at all, I have not really met any friends in months...

I am seriusly considering "dropping out" as I will likely just fail and it feels so useless having to pay back years of student loans (which I will gather if I continue this education) when you got no education to speak of out of it...

 

[Vegeta897]

Perhaps an idea is to get married to someone who you can 'lean on" so to speak.

 

[Hectic Glenn]

Perhaps an idea is to get married to someone who you can 'lean on" so to speak.

Heh...interesting idea. I was thinking the same, but not as advanced as marriage. Is there anyway you can get help with looking after your apartment? Also with the tiredness, could you get sent work via email so you could do it when you could, rather than miss out or not have the energy to concentrate?

Also have you looked into sorting out a better routine, or going to a sleep clinic? You could perhaps work around when you need to study, find specific times to eat & sleep to build energy, and find some free time for your own thing. Even if it means naps during the day, they can be really helpful.

I wasn't aware of this condition, and despite not being hugely debilitating, it obviously has far reaching effects. Quitting or dropping out would be the last solution if all else fails, don't give in easily.

 

[JNightshade]

Yeah. I know it sucks, but you just have to keep going. I'm sure you can pull it off

 

[Ridge]

Buy a case of some of that energy booster stuff (not energy drinks)

 

[HunterSeeker]

Is there anyway you can get help with looking after your apartment?

Possibly, but that would only be of minor assistance. I have lately only washed my clothes, done the dishes, taking out the trash and cleaned the toilet. The apartment looks like shit, it is evident that I have ignored taking care of it in favor of studies. I doubt getting help with the apparment would help much though. Chances are I would have to pay for it (I am such a borderline case that Im not sure if the state would be ready to pay for it or not), and living on a student loan makes it too expensive.

Also with the tiredness, could you get sent work via email so you could do it when you could, rather than miss out or not have the energy to concentrate?

Thats pretty much allready the case. Having had this disease my entire life I know how to conserve my energy so I can stay focused during lectures. The problem is the 50 hours a week we are expected to study (compared to the roughly 30 I am used to... and even then there where cases where I had difficulty handling it).

Also have you looked into sorting out a better routine, or going to a sleep clinic? You could perhaps work around when you need to study, find specific times to eat & sleep to build energy, and find some free time for your own thing. Even if it means naps during the day, they can be really helpful.

My routine is rather good when I am not stressed out which makes it impossible for me to fall asleep (this is not the first time that happens).

I wasn't aware of this condition, and despite not being hugely debilitating, it obviously has far reaching effects.

I am unlucky enough to be a quite severe case with this disease (I have undergone foot surgery twice for one thing due to this, If I had not done that I would likely not be able to walk today). Although Im glad that Im not like my mothers cousing, who has two versions of this...

Quitting or dropping out would be the last solution if all else fails, don't give in easily.

Its definatly the worst soloution and one I wont use without at least discussing my options with a councelor (or whatever they call it).

 

[AiM]

Try talking to a couselor on the school about your problem? If it's severe enough to negatively impact your studies / lifestyle ,then I'm sure they can come with a compromise for you.

 

[Dan]

Well, if you plan on being independent you're going to have to find some way to cope with what you've got. So suck it up and do whatever you have to do. Sure it's a sucky hand but there's lots of people with worse lots in life.

PS I've found that the key to dealing with heavy workloads is to be as lazy as possible. Only do the required assignments. If lectures are just repeats of the readings then don't go and do the readings on your own. Don't go to tutorials. Just study hard for about 8 hours for the big exams and you can get by with passing marks.

 

[HunterSeeker]

Well, if you plan on being independent you're going to have to find some way to cope with what you've got. So suck it up and do whatever you have to do. Sure it's a sucky hand but there's lots of people with worse lots in life.

Captain Obious to the rescue! Of cource there are people with much worse lives then me (billions I would assume, at least I live in a first world country), but that dosent mean its not hard for me.

PS I've found that the key to dealing with heavy workloads is to be as lazy as possible. Only do the required assignments. If lectures are just repeats of the readings then don't go and do the readings on your own. Don't go to tutorials. Just study hard for about 8 hours for the big exams and you can get by with passing marks.

I dunno what kind of university you are studying at but thats not the case here, the exams are very difficult and you really need to understand the concepts you are working with to pass them, they dont exactly show mercy when correcting either.

 

[zleppelin]

HunterSeeker, I am not very good when it comes to giving advice, but here are my thoughts on the matter. You can probably get disability compensation from the government which I am guessing should be an easy thing to do considering that you live in Sweden. I also think you should continue your education, but if you think you can't handle the amount of work at your currect school and are not learning anything, why don't you drop out from that school and join a community college or some other institution of higher learning that is not too academically demanding and not too expensive?

 

[Fliko]

Try talking to a couselor on the school about your problem? If it's severe enough to negatively impact your studies / lifestyle ,then I'm sure they can come with a compromise for you.

Agreed... Also, try getting a GF or even just a friend to help you around the house

 

[HunterSeeker]

You can probably get disability compensation from the government which I am guessing should be an easy thing to do considering that you live in Sweden.

Tried that and again I was borderline (you need to have an extra cost of about 14000 sek a year at least and they calculated mine to be something like 12000). I do have salary assistance, in that if a company hires me part of my salary will be paid by the state. I will likely be able to get reduced work days if my employeers agree to it with compensation from the state (my mother has it and shes a less severe case then I am), those wont help now though.

I think you should continue your education, but if you think you can't handle the amount of work at your currect school and are not learning anything, why don't you drop out from that school and join a community college or some other institution of higher learning that is not too academically demanding and not too expensive?

As a side note: All higher education is free (or rather, universities recieve a certain amount of money from the state for each student they are teaching).

I have been thinking of taking a less demanding education. Thats likely what I will go for should I drop out.

 

[zleppelin]

As a side note: All higher education is free (or rather, universities recieve a certain amount of money from the state for each student they are teaching).

I am not sure what you meant when you said "it feels so useless having to pay back years of student loans" then.

I have been thinking of taking a less demanding education. Thats likely what I will go for should I drop out.

What about taking a reduced course load at your current school?

 

[Fliko]

Tried that and again I was borderline

Couldn't you hold some kind of 'hearing' or something of that for sort?

Hell, even just get a petition and try to get people to sign it... Anything to make your life easier.

All in all, like suggested before, just continue on.

 

[Steven]

Kill yourself?

 

[Krynn72]

What about taking a reduced course load at your current school?

I agree with this. It may take you an extra year to complete but if you dont take as many courses at once it may help out a great deal in your case.

 

[Dan]

I dunno what kind of university you are studying at but thats not the case here, the exams are very difficult and you really need to understand the concepts you are working with to pass them, they dont exactly show mercy when correcting either.

I do mech engineering at UBC. It's a big university... for Canada. From what I've seen of Norwegian universities the workload isn't very hard at all. I don't know if Sweden is similar.

 

[HunterSeeker]

I agree with this. It may take you an extra year to complete but if you dont take as many courses at once it may help out a great deal in your case.

This education is 5 years long, and I will likely have to take more then an extra year to manage it. Which means more student loans (to cover living expenses) and I am not sure I want to take my dept to high, I wont be able to handle working full time for forever.

 

[zleppelin]

This education is 5 years long, and I will likely have to take more then an extra year to manage it. Which means more student loans (to cover living expenses) and I am not sure I want to take my dept to high, I wont be able to handle working full time for forever.

In that case you'll need to marry a wealthy woman or win the lottery.

 

[Solaris]

Well, if you plan on being independent you're going to have to find some way to cope with what you've got. So suck it up and do whatever you have to do. Sure it's a sucky hand but there's lots of people with worse lots in life.

You come off sounding pretty ignorant there, its very easy to tell people who have it hard that other people have it worse.

 

[Dan]

You come off sounding pretty ignorant there, its very easy to tell people who have it hard that other people have it worse.

Did I say something that was a lie? How was it ignorant? Lots of people have tough lives. I remind myself of that whenever I have to do something hard.

 

[tehsolace]

Its admirable that you've pushed this far and it would be a disappointment if you dropped out now.

Student loans are one of the very few forms of 'good credit'. Its called good credit because despite the interest rates that you are paying, you are inevidably making money in the end by taking out the loan (since you will have a degree and be more eligable for higher paying jobs in the future).

I suggest you continue to push through... lighten your work load if you have to so you can assure yourself a good amount of focus on each class so you can do well.

 

[Darkwolf]

Kill yourself?

You fail.

But seriously. If you can prove to the univercity that your studies are being affected by a disability, and prove to them by doing more then saying 'I have so-forth-and-so-on', unless the vice-chancellor (or whoever runs it) is a complete fvckjob, then they should give you extensions and whatever no probs. Perhaps you should get them to have an observer of your daily life, so that they can see that you are struggling.

Or get your doctor to do the cool thing some doctors do, where they stroll into a random office, whack the guy behind the desk in the mouth, then stroll out again. Man, that would be awesome... an army of ninja doctor privateers. Hehe...

 

[Core407]

Is there anything you can do to battle the tiredness?

 

[Darkwolf]

Hehe... adrenaline pens?

 

[Sulkdodds]

Well, having had this condition (I assume) all your life, I suppose it's useless giving you tips about organisation/routine or anything I could actually think of, because you've been living with it.

All I can say is talk to your tutors or whoever about it. But then, you've probably done that already since it's startingly obvious.