Write Valve's "Gone Gold" Press Release for 'Em.

[SFLUFAN]

Pretend you're Valve's beleagured public relations department and you've just gotten word from Gabe that HL2 has finally gone gold and he wants you to compose the press release that announces to the world this momentous news.

You're sitting at your computer with Word open - what do you write?

Mine would read: "Gone Gold. Now STFU."

 

[Murray_H]

2 loaves please darling, 1 white, one brown

I am ok for socks

Love Gabe

In my world, the gold email press release got mixed up with one meant for gabe's wife

 

[Platinum]

Gold bitches ... :afro:

 

[CrazyHarij]

"We are pleased to announce that the game has finally reached gold status,
and is being shipped to Vivendi for final distribution and shipping. It will reach stores in a few months." - Lombardi

 

[Sgt_Shellback]

"Dude we released it months ago hidden inside the SIMS House Party box... We figured someone would have bought one by now and figured it out but noooooo...."

 

[poseyjmac]

halflife2 has gone gold and will be in stores in 2 weeks. we are also pleased to announce the new MP mode for halflife2 called combine vs resistance. and now that we've announced it, we'd like to say, good luck on modding it in bitches! haha!

 

[Mountain Man]

"Half-Life 2 has gone gold and will be available for purchase through Steam or retail on September 21, 2004."

 

[Inanimate]

"Half Life2 has gone gold, but we intend to keep the game for ourselves. Hope you don´t mind"

 

[Asuka]

Gold Woowotowotowotowow Daosmdomgoamodmsomgoamomdsmdomw Owowowowoowowtotowootowowtotw

 

[Calhoun]

"Today's monday and we've gone gold."

 

[B.Calhoun]

we'd like to say, good luck on modding it in bitches! haha!

LMFAO

 

[Hitman47]

"Half-Life 2 has finally gone gold. Unfortunately, the goldmaster and all our PCs got stolen.
But this is not a problem. We will just push the game back for - let's roll a dice - 6 years.

Have fun waiting!
Best Regards, your Doug L."

 

[wonkers]

The only thing scarier than Doom 3 is HL2 going gold. Guess what!

 

[ShadowFox]

"It's gone gold. Take that Halo 2 fanboys."

 

[KidRock]

"the gold disk has somehow been stolen im sorry..HL2 will now be released in TBA 2005"

 

[SubKamran]

Pretend you're Valve's beleagured public relations department and you've just gotten word from Gabe that HL2 has finally gone gold and he wants you to compose the press release that announces to the world this momentous news.

You're sitting at your computer with Word open - what do you write?

Mine would read: "Gone Gold. Now STFU."

It's here.

 

[Roland Deschain]

If I were Valve I would hire Tool (band) to do a hardcore metal song entitled "Gold. Finally."

[EDIT]: Neat thread, by the way

 

[Citizen 1150421]

ladies and gentlemen. we have recieved important word from valve

they just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to [geyco]

and they say the sdk will be release so you can make your own half life 2.. cause valve is keeping thier game to themselves.

 

[Anthraxxx]

"We are pleased to announce that Half-Life 2 has gone...... Oh shit! Where'd it go?? F*CK! Gabe is gonna MURDER me!!"


EDIT: "Somewhere between September 8th - December 31, 2005; Gabe Newell will make you his bitch!" <- making fun of Daikatana and John Romero....

 

[Roland Deschain]

"We are pleased to announce that Half-Life 2 has gone...... Oh shit! Where'd it go?? F*CK! Gabe is gonna MURDER me!!:

best one so far. Dude, make a backup copy!!!!

 

[dart321]

We are very pleased to announce that Half-Life 2 has finally gone gold and will be available via steam and retail on November 1st. We also would like to announce that the collectors edition will contain a plush headcrab, a limited edition DVD of Half-Life 2, an- ...


What do you mean, "just releasing the RC"? *Gabe whispering in the background* What? You have to do that?

 

[Cyb3rac1d]

We're ecstatic to tell you Half-Life 2 has just gone gold! They said we'd never keep schedule... who's laughing n- SINCE WHEN THE HELL HAS IT BEEN 2004?!

 

[DC9884]

Half-Life 2 has officially gone gold. Just as we said it would a year ago, it would, (and has) gone gold on September 30, 200-- ****!

 

[ELIXIR]

The only thing scarier than Doom 3 is HL2 going gold. Guess what!

that earns you my sig

 

[SFLUFAN]

Thank you Lazicsavo - it's just something creative to have fun with

 

[nw909]

It's gold!

yeah this is the real Gabe Newell

Seriously

garglegargle

 

[Letterhead]

I would like to announce that we would be going gold but this nice man offered Gabe some candy for the gold master and...well, he couldn't resist.

 

[Grand Architect]

*fires flare

What? This is what we said we'd do isn't it?

 

[tokin]

Half Life 2 has now gone GOLD, we finally managed to create a deal with some alaskans and got a great deal on a crap load of real gold, so we are currently making all of the discs 24kt gold on the top. We plan to finish this up in a few months and then post pictures of our christmas party we are having in Decemeber, after that expect to hear an official announcement from Doug about the last binks and then hopefully a release date for the game...That's just if you guys are good and don't hate on us. HarHar Thanks A lot.

 

[kathunx]

"Great News! Half-life 2 has gone gold! And Silver! And Bronze! We're great! This is my 9th pint! Who am I? Give me my dog back"

 

[dkelly]

Hell froze over.
-Doug L.

 

[razorblade kiss]

Pretend you're Valve's beleagured public relations department and you've just gotten word from Gabe that HL2 has finally gone gold and he wants you to compose the press release that announces to the world this momentous news.

You're sitting at your computer with Word open - what do you write?

Mine would read: "Gone Gold. Now STFU."

This was a great idea for a thread! We needed some creativity during the recent drought of good threads!! Greeat idea!

Heres mine...

"Well HL1 hasn't sold a copy in 3 weeks, so now we can release HL2. It will be out in 2 weeks. Cha-Ching!!!!" - Gaben

 

[shaggy2039]

"HL2 has gone gold, it will be released on November 1st. We're praying to God that it sells the required minimum of 70 billion units to break even on Valve's substantial financial and emotional investment in the game..."

 

[MultiVaC]

HL2 is gold. We've decided to include Team Fortress 2 with the game to help HL2 compete with Duke Nukem Forever, which ships during the same week.

 

[tokin]

HL2 is gold. We've decided to include Team Fortress 2 with the game to help HL2 compete with Duke Nukem Forever, which ships during the same week.

Best one yet :thumbs:

 

[Rasded]

HL2 has gone gold and we forgot to mention that it does support full co-op play over LAN or NET unlink HALO for PC

 

[slider3005]

Half-life 2 has gone gold but you guys missed secrets 3-28 so until you find and complete them we will be laughing at you.

-the real Gabe

 

[tokin]

LOL wouldn't that be funny if Gabe actually posted in here and officially announced a gold date, lol that'd be GREAT.

 

[Inanimate]

Gabe got bored at the office and used the only HL2 CD as a fresbee.
If you´d come across it, call him, he is still living with his parents so don´t call after 9pm.

 

[Icarusintel]

"Holy f*cketysh*t, HL2 is teh gold, now we are teh l33t3st haxorz of jooz allz" - Gabe, moments before he is slapped by Hordon Freemen wit teh crowbar