Chimp goes ape, rips woman's face off

Well thats if he wasn't put to death the first time. I wonder what zombie steak tastes like.
 
Most of it I don't believe. I think Natural Selection and Evolution have got it mostly wrong, but have some good points.

Eeijit, you make me so mad I want to send a friend request.
 
Natural Selection is pretty much perfect.
I don't enjoy combat mode so much, but vanilla maps are simply awesome. Can't wait for Natural Selection 2.
 
Religious debates are Sterns specialty.

Edit : I was waiting for some one to say what Eejit said.
 
Eejit said:
Natural Selection is pretty much perfect.
I don't enjoy combat mode so much, but vanilla maps are simply awesome. Can't wait for Natural Selection 2. Oh and I hope Officer Combine doesn't quote this.
Click to expand...

Heh. I thought I was the one that didn't make sense.
 
If it doesn't make sense to you that's your loss I'm afraid.
 
Mech Man said:
Religious debates are Sterns specialty.

Edit : I was waiting for some one to say what Eejit said.
Click to expand...


you must have me confused with Absinthe, Mechgodzilla or a half dozen other people who debate religion far better than I do. I limit my religious debate to ridicule and scorn.
 
Oh no , it was you I was thinking of but it seems I got the debate part mixed up with ridicule and scorn. Any way back to the topic at hand people! This thread needs more puns STAT!
 
So who has more common sense: Tom Cruise or this Chimp? I personally say Tom by a small margin. He only killed one person.
 
Officer Combine said:
What I was saying is that animals have the instincts of their species. A sheepdog chases sheep naturally. A wolf naturally wants to kill things. An ape naturally will defend its property with violence.
Click to expand...

That's a load of shit. To dismiss all of an animals' behavior as involuntary "instinct" is doing a huge injustice. Especially that of a species as intelligent as chimpanzees. Animals like mammals and birds don't work fundamentally different from humans, there's nothing that magically separates a human from an animal, humans are animals. No magical barrier that makes humans intelligent but animals mindless robots, but certainly a gradation of intelligence, with humans the most intelligent.

It's especially funny to bring this up in a thread about a chimp going apeshit, because we all know that humans are not capable of enraged violence like this, right?

But then again, your other posts show that you have little understanding of biology.

Posts like this:
Officer Combine said:
Where did that one celled creature branch off to become both a naked mole rat and a human? A cat and a donkey?

And NO STERN, we can't all get along.
Click to expand...

You clearly don't know anything about evolution.
 
It's probably been said already, but MAYBE if she wasn't monkeying around so much...
 
zombieturtle01 said:
It's not really crazy at all, they use their arms the most to move around/climb stuff, so naturally they would have superior upper body strength to that of the old Bipedal Human.
Click to expand...

So the answer is to kick then to death?.

Got ya. *puts on the steel tipped boots*

Ahhh the perfect weapon, a combination of human strengths.... our mighty long speedy legs + the human brain = steel tipped pain.
 
This whole thing reminds me of the ''Hail to the Chimp'' film that Homer is watching in a Simpsons episode once. I can find a picture of the President at his desk but damned if I can find the ''No, Mr. President!'' scene where the chimp is punching some suit in the head around the Oval Office.

Oh, how I use to laugh at the Simpsons.
 
but certainly a gradation of intelligence, with humans the most intelligent.

That's wrong.
 
Yeah, the mice are the most intelligent life form on Earth.
 
Officer Combine said:
but certainly a gradation of intelligence, with humans the most intelligent.

That's wrong.
Click to expand...

You're wrong.



And that's not an attempt at a humorously lame come back. That's a serious factual statement. You're wrong.
 
This is lies! Propaganda spread by jealous humans who felt the need to push us down after we pwned you in the memory department.
 
The end has begun.

statue_planet.jpg


Also, can we have ban for people who don't accept theory of evolution?
 
In my sleepy stupor this morning at 7:30AM EST I woke up and was lying in bed. I was listening to the news in the living room and they said that a chimp ripped off a womans face. I was like .......omg. D: Then they played the 911 call and I was like "wtf is going on in the backround" I just chuckled. Feel bad for the hairy one. :( *AH THAT IS RIGHT! I GET TO USE MY SIG FROM TYGUY!
Tyguy-cheerio my good man, what say you fetch me a banana...don't make me throw feces at you.
Click to expand...
More like rip off your face, amirite? :naughty:
 
This is why Chimps scare the shit outta me, they have several times the upper body strength of a human despite being physically smaller. This is not the first time something like this is happened.

Lesson: Don't keep Chimps as pet's.
 
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