Drafted into the war in Iraq what would you do?

[CptStern]

So you've just been drafted into the US army and are facing a tour of duty in iraq ..what do you do?

 

[$kelet0r]

what draft?

 

[Sulkdodds]

It's a hypothetical situation set in a dystopian futureworld where you are drafted into the US army, nub!

My action: survive and write a novel of my experiences.

I would call it "Irate in Iraq" and become rich and also famous.

 

[CptStern]

poll is up ..the draft is hypothetical and it stems from a conversation I had with Numbers in another thread

 

[Warbie]

Say I was a gay, bowlegged pacifist, cover myself in poo, stick socks on my hands, trousers on my head and jibber like a loon.

 

[zleppelin]

Neither. I'd throw myself down the stairs and break my neck or a limb.

 

[The Monkey]

I'd play mad and be let off.

 

[CptStern]

Say I was a gay, bowlegged pacifist, cover myself in poo, stick socks on my hands, trousers on my head and jibber like a loon.

I'll put you down as:

Conscientious Objector:
reasons stated:
a: possible section 8
b: may have physical problems that would prevent him from being cannon fodder
c. possible homoersexual
d. possibly muslim


response for request for Conscientious Objector status: denied
reasons given:
a. Being crazy is not an excuse
b. physical problems will not interfere with cannon fodder duties
c. recently instated "dont tell" policy on homersexuals
d. the word "muslim" is forbidden on government documents, therefore is not recognised as a valid reason not to kill muslims

 

[Aenama]

I would serve.But I lost my army reg papers
So I really should get those draft papers before I get in trouble.

 

[Warbie]

Thinking about it seriously - it'd be a tough call between being drafted and going to jail. Infact, leaving the country looks by far the more attractive alternative.

 

[CptStern]

that's what I thought too ..thankfully my parents prepared for such an eventuality ..I have dual citizenship ..so if canada goes to war I'll say I cant cuz I'm a citizen of spain ..and if spain goes to war I'll say ..cant I'm a canadian citizen ..if they both go to war I'll emmigrate to france

 

[Warbie]

What if Spain and Canada go to war with each other and everyone involved takes the opportunity to destroy France in the process in the hope that nobody notices?

 

[CptStern]

well then I guess Ill move to the US

:O <shudder>

 

[zleppelin]

They'll deport you back to Canada

 

[CptStern]

no they wont, I have relatives there .. they'll squirrel me away till the time is right

 

[Warbie]

Come to England - we take all sorts. You don't even have to be useful, or like English people for that matter.

 

[Tyguy]

Do my duty and go home i suppose

 

[Raziaar]

Come to England - we take all sorts. You don't even have to be useful, or like English people for that matter.

What if we call crisps chips... and chips fries?

 

[Solaris]

Refuse to serve....

To the death.

Or flee.

 

[CptStern]

Come to England - we take all sorts. You don't even have to be useful, or like English people for that matter.

I could ..I have european citizenship (thanks Spain) ..can I get the welfare till I get on my feet? ...at least I speak the language :E

 

[Warbie]

What if we call crisps chips... and chips fries?

At least it's English (well, in a way )

I could ..I have european citizenship (thanks Spain) ..can I get the welfare till I get on my feet? ...at least I speak the language :E

Sure - have a house while you're at it

Every day 1500 people come to live here. Every day 1000 British people leave. Sorry for flying offtopic.

 

[Solaris]

Every day 1500 people come to live here. Every day 1000 British people leave. Sorry for flying offtopic.

Stop it with your daily mail bullshit.

More people emmigrate than immigrate into this country, I saw it in a home office report. I'll happilly dig it up but save me the time and put that anti-immigration propaganda back up your arse.

 

[Warbie]

If needs be we can find all sorts of reports which contradict each other. Infact, there was a whole evening on talk sport devoted to how the figures you're talking about from the home office are as accurate as someone with cerebral palsy trying to shoot a bow and arrow.

 

[kirovman]

I'd cut off my thumbs and state that I can't fire a rifle.

Actually, flee sounds better. I have some secluded picnic spots that noone knows about yet.

 

[CptStern]

or so you think

/me packs video camera with telescopic lenses and shuts down Kirovman romantic encounters website

 

[kirovman]

Damn you Yogi Bear, this is the last time you Blackmail Kirovman! D:

 

[Hazar]

I'd try the conscientious objector route and if that didn't work I'd serve

 

[kirovman]

If I served, I'd play silly pranks like leaving live grenades lying around with the pin triggered to come out at the drop of a hat.

 

[ComradeBadger]

I'd try the conscientious objector route and if that didn't work I'd serve

Ditto.

 

[gick]

Well I dont fancy getting assraped in prison, so I'd go to Iraq to drive ambulances or something.

I mean, really it depends on who we're fighting - I wouldnt want a combat role in Iraq because I disagree with the war, but if it was UK vs some kind of evil Nazi comeback then, hell yeah - pass me a rifle and let me at 'em.

 

[Absinthe]

Move to Canada.

 

[JNightshade]

Move to Canada.

.

 

[CptStern]

Well I dont fancy getting assraped in prison, so I'd go to Iraq to drive ambulances or something.

I mean, really it depends on who we're fighting - I wouldnt want a combat role in Iraq because I disagree with the war, but if it was UK vs some kind of evil Nazi comeback then, hell yeah - pass me a rifle and let me at 'em.

it's not, the war is iraq and the army is the US ..you'll be serving at least one tour of duty in iraq ..combat is implied regardless of the role you're in

 

[gick]

it's not, the war is iraq and the army is the US ..you'll be serving at least one tour of duty in iraq ..combat is implied regardless of the role you're in

Well in that case i'd probably move to Canada. But I'd have done that already if I was an American.

 

[CptStern]

heh you mean canadian

as a citizen of Canada I'd like to welcome our New Citizens to our glorious country ..please exit through the back door for your new life in canada ..all americans must leave their firearms at the door before entering canada ...good luck

 

[DEATHMASTER]

Like hell I'll non-voluntarily go to a war, I'd flee!

 

[kirovman]

It really depends what the conflict is about.

As gick says, if it's the fight against a new Nazi uprising or something, then yes I will fight. Preferably as an arm-chair commander.

But the Iraq war isn't a terribly noble cause, which is what this thread is about.

 

[Ome_Vince]

Sterno you should add the ancient tactic of: break thy own leg

 

[Stigmata]

Honestly? I would tell them in person that I'm a conscientious objector and that I'm also gay, but bring along my gay friend, and if they ask if I really am gay, start making out with him.

Or flee. You know, whatever.

 

[repiV]

If I could pass the medical I'd already be in the military.

So, I think it's obvious that I would quite gladly go.