Freestyle Rap Thread!

I really think that every time one of us makes a new rap thing, he/she should record it over a beat and post a link along with the text version.
 
Dis is fun.

Needs more challengers. I'm getting slammed here.

I didn't just admit that, btw.
 
Break it down now.

*chicka-chicka*
 
Shadow's a funny guy
some lines had me rolling
I almost don't want to battle him
but this is no place for extolling

And I can't hate but I'll say your rap needs some work
because the words are hilarious but the beat starts to jerk
and it sounds like start-stopping
like lyrical pop-locking
your rhythm is cock-blocking
the flow is too shocking

And for the record just so you know I pity you
you said you had sex with my girl, didn't you?
Oh it's such a shame that she's ridden you
now you've got all the diseases I gave to her; sorry dude

Iambs, Stigmata? Sounds like a brand of dog food
rap doesn't have protocol, the rhymes are all straight mood
with lyrics set out to inspire a blood feud
to rile the enemy and make him come unglued

Speaking of enemies

Hey look I'm xlucidx and I can make dumb comments
crackers crackers crackers crackers
this thread makes me want to vomit HURRRRR

You're so witty, LOL WHITE PEOPLE RAPPING 'cause we haven't heard that before
you don't like it? GTFO, this thread isn't that hard to ignore
But you had to open your mouth didn't you? I guess you're too cool
'cause you're not trying to rap like the rest of these white fools
but I bet you're just jealous because you can't spit like this
even if you wanted to rap I bet your words would still be shit
you say "whitest thread ever" but I think you're a hypocrite
because who's whiter than a forum troll? Answer me, bitch

See we're all here rapping to have fun
not because we want to be black or sip 40s or carry handguns
we're rapping to pass the time and to challenge our friends
and all this rhyming keeps the mind sharp and keeps our wits at their ends
So if you're going to be a dick then leave, elsewise you can suck on my choad
I need a quick release anyway; my porn is taking too long to download :(
 
darkseidsm0.jpg
 
Sorry guy's, Choppa's been closed due to aids. You'll have to use the official hl2net bus instead.
 
So there goes Darkside
Bustin' out a smooth rhyme
I call him Darkstyles
Jint calls him Darkseid.

He stares at his computer reading these posts
while wondering if we're complementing or simply doing some roasts
He raises his fist ans smiles with a look so sinister
and people point and shout "F*CK RUN HE'S HERE!"

We run and fight to get to da chopper
but along comes Putin "Lol chopper's closed due to AIDS someone took in in the pooper"
There's shock, awe and an incredible fuss
there's not time for that now we gotta get to da bus

I must finish this rhyme there's no where to continue
until something else happens so for now we're all sitting ducks
So until then watch out don't let Dark get you
*Reads rhyme* Jesus Christ this rhyme ****ing sucks!
 
Respect for Willie equals over nine-thousand
cos before i thought he was merely rhymin' like cows, and
it's harder than you think to find a rhyme for a number
so i resorted to crap shit like this to cover.

Ah, crap.
 
Came to this site to take a break
But turns out 'twas a big mistake
Coz' Willie is in da house and on da loose
Yo, homie, gimme some more booze!

I look around for dem hawt chix
to share with, this awesome mix
But then Jintor says this is the Interwebs, bitch!
And now I'm getting this urge to itch..

I dig into my my weedburger and put on some mayo
while listening to RHCP's 'Hey Oh!'
Some may think it's just a loada shit
and so do I, come to think of it..

What's with the the lyrics, they make no sense
But what the hell, it's better than 50 cent.
Now it's time for me to stop bustin rhymes
It's late already..look at the time!!
 
While you bitches 'ave been messin' with mah S.H.I.T
I'sa been loggin' all your passwords and your steam_ID's
So it won't be long until you're cryin' in the corna' you see
'cuz I'll be cheating on your accounts and bannin' your CD key!

Yeah tha's right,
you thought I was just a pub'sta', but you be wrong
'cuz I been hackin' all a-****ing-long, shi-at

*breaking it down*
and so when you see me come round the corner with my gun
you be thinking "dying this many times ain't fun"
and when you demo me you'll see my aimbot all twitch
and think "I've been ****ed about by this bitch,
he ain't good he ain't fly he ain't even got skillz
so why I playin' in my clan when it no longer pays tha billz"
Another few games and you'll be all "wrryyyyy" at me,
but that's ok 'cuz I'm on a killin' spree, and don't hear
your pain or cursing my aim, 'cuz I'm a hacker, and so it's the program you'll blame.
 
Time to wrap up this rap... :p

Life ain't always a bed of roses
sometimes you just feel like Moses
bearing the weight of the world on your shoulder
but you just have to buck up and hold her
and from her touch you draw courage
courage to fight this insane fight
where you're only tryna do what's right.

But someone's always in the way
a naysayer, a pessimist, a loser
an as*hole, a retard, an oxygen abuser
Telling you it cant done,
cuz u gonna fail and that ain't no fun.
But boy, every now and then
lift your self from your den
take a look, evaluate
your priorities, then activate
the motor that keeps you on track
the fuel injectors, so you dont hold back.

Trudge in the shit but dont let it consume
Nobody's perfect, so you just hafta assume
the Universe is on your side, not his
So anybody who doubts can take a piss
Destiny is always ours to choose
and in this life, you snooze, you lose...
 
Hey look I'm xlucidx and I can make dumb comments
crackers crackers crackers crackers
this thread makes me want to vomit HURRRRR

You're so witty, LOL WHITE PEOPLE RAPPING 'cause we haven't heard that before
you don't like it? GTFO, this thread isn't that hard to ignore
But you had to open your mouth didn't you? I guess you're too cool
'cause you're not trying to rap like the rest of these white fools
but I bet you're just jealous because you can't spit like this
even if you wanted to rap I bet your words would still be shit
you say "whitest thread ever" but I think you're a hypocrite
because who's whiter than a forum troll? Answer me, bitch

See we're all here rapping to have fun
not because we want to be black or sip 40s or carry handguns
we're rapping to pass the time and to challenge our friends
and all this rhyming keeps the mind sharp and keeps our wits at their ends
So if you're going to be a dick then leave, elsewise you can suck on my choad
I need a quick release anyway; my porn is taking too long to download :(

Ouch.
I do admit that I couldn't free-style even if I tried.
I'd rather just stay away and lie on my couch...
While getting my brain good and fried.

...yeah.

I lose.
*exits thread*
 
This shit is beautiful cos more and more
lil' freestylers are comin knockin' door to door
to say this, and rhyme that, and kick the butt
and insult lil' trolls, like Xlucidx the hutt.
The best we can do and i think what i say
is we call more, and more dudes, to play today
like Samon, or Stern, or JCNightshade
or Beerdude, or Quonfused, or ninja Sasuke
it's all good to join us in makin' skilled rhymes
while we argue, and insult, and don't make skilled crimes.
 
I just realised - studying pays
coz 4 on 20, is what my report card says
yes, its a sad day for me
I always thought science was easy
But these days I'm playing too much CS
And it doesn't help that I just got TF
Another game, another wasted day
it's like my life's fading to grey
I'm a sad, sad wreck today
but still not Emo, I must say
Listening to some Puddle of Mudd
Usually helps to get throught this crud
But today that just wont do
So I'm here, discussing Half-life 2

No place like home... :)
 
The name be Danimal
AKA Banimal
I ban yer' ass
And I do it with class.

I really can't go further without strangling myself from rap.
 
Cant think of any sweet words right now
Gotta get to Math class, ciao.
 
You thought this thread was over? You're wrong, it's just beginning
we're going to stretch this baby out to the bottom of the ninth inning
Let's keep up the flow, keep this verbal tapestry spinning
No room for losers here, there's only room for winning

Props to my boy Vik, his rhymes are so poetic
not in line with a battle but you know it's copacetic
At first I thought he was being emo and I was about to object
but I feel what he's saying and now he's got my respect

And Shadow yo it's crazy you rap kinda like I do
you think up a beat that you force your words to conform to
and you put it to an emotion which is exactly like me
I guess it's true what they say--great minds think similarly

And as a writer my vocabulary is verbose, verisimilous, sesquipedalian
I come up with rhymes that burst through your chest like an alien

They call me Darkseid, parademons herald my destruction
omega beams set you alight like internal combustion
Even the Justice League fear me
My Apokaliptic raps will make you revere me

Form and language, this is my art
dark words, dark styles, cut straight to your heart

X get your ass back here and put up a fight
I want to see something new from you no later than tomorrow night
You should be angry at my words, you should have a bloodthirst to be slaked
it's funner to rap with us than to lay on your couch and get baked

Danimal don't strangle yourself please--I'll do it for you
just because you're a mod doesn't mean we can't abhor you
Only newbies run in fear of you
while the rest of us just jeer at you
and leer at you
with rape eyes we peer at you

And speaking of which your avatar sure is breathing heavy
the way he's moving makes me think that he's getting pounded steady
I don't know why but I only noticed it just today
Yo I think your avatar might be a little unconforming to the generally accepted sexual norms of modern society ;)

Anyway I'm tired so I'm going to bounce
I want to see some new blood in here and I wanna see 'em put every ounce
into keeping this thread hot
don't want to see this thread shot
to page two, dried up passe and just plain forgot
I know some of you want in on this; don't be afraid
we're judging you, sure, but it's only a game
 
Darkseid, dude, New Genesis salutes you
Kryptonite to Supes and Batman who pollute you
but while we're sitting here rollin' rhymes day by day
Missynarc and other peeps are spamming offtopic.

Get back to work, Darkseid. -_-
 
My boy Jint don't rush the man
He's tired he's worn he can't give out the ban
We're gonna keep this thread runnin' all night
We're gonna pump out rhymes that are outta sight
I've got all spring break to do this, lay out the dis
But I'm countin'on you guys to keep rappin' be it a hit or a miss.
 
Ma brain's a mess, my life's a test
a big one ready to crush me
and here i sit, movin' mice to click
"Post Quick Reply"; you can't touch me
I'm down, I'm out, I'm tired as hell
and piano fingers can't restore,
A phoenix down would serve me well
but i'm HP-free, fo'sure.
 
Danimal don't strangle yourself please--I'll do it for you
just because you're a mod doesn't mean we can't abhor you
Only newbies run in fear of you
while the rest of us just jeer at you
and leer at you
with rape eyes we peer at you

Newbies run for a good reason,
They know that it's time for the banning season,
Rape-eyes, huh?
Bring it son!
Little you know I'm hiding the ban-gun,
Hiding like a ninja
Not like a binge-drinka'
From the dark bushes I spring,
By the time I'm done; your ears, they'll still ring.

Screw the stranglin'
It's time for the tanglin'
Rapping, crapping and fapping
Welcome to Half-life2.net.


And speaking of which your avatar sure is breathing heavy
the way he's moving makes me think that he's getting pounded steady
I don't know why but I only noticed it just today
Yo I think your avatar might be a little unconforming to the generally accepted sexual norms of modern society

Get a clue, kid.
This is from Starcraft, the avatar a mini-vid
The Terran Ghost
Your death's host
NUCLEAR LAUNCH DETECTED
The bomb drops on your head,
Before you can yell "WE'RE ****ED, FRED!"
 
Danimal and Darkseid are at it again
Why do you two inflict so much pain?
It's all pointless, cant you see
In the end it all comes down to me.
My uber rap style, it may not be venom,
but if you set me off, I'll leave yo head spinnin'

Once I've unleashed the fury within
You'll beg me stop, but I'm the Icon of Sin
I don't take no crap, especially not from you
You think you're hiphop? I think you're a n00b
I rap faster than you fap,
and you've fallen for my trap
My words are like bullets,
and you drop like a WW2 Jap.
So y'all can stop comparing ya skillz
cause ain't none like me, I dont do cheap thrills.
I go for the real stuff, from the heart of my bottom
And as for the l33t skillz, you can bet I've got 'em.
 
Danimal and Darkseid are at it again
Why do you two inflict so much pain?
It's all pointless, cant you see
In the end it all comes down to me.

It all comes down to you?
Yeah, and there's dragons stuck on mah' shoe,
Keep dreaming, pup
So then I can show you what's up.

My uber rap style, it may not be venom,
but if you set me off, I'll leave yo head spinnin'

Uber?
More like Fubar
You and me, we'll drop palms
By the time it ends
I'll leave you to make your mends.

Once I've unleashed the fury within
You'll beg me stop, but I'm the Icon of Sin
I don't take no crap, especially not from you
You think you're hiphop? I think you're a n00b

Go ahead, unleash your fury,
My words are convincin', I could convert you to FURRY.
Here, kid, I gotsa' gift for you,
A freshly wrapped turd, it goes great with your word!
What's that? You took it?
You really took crap?
Now that ain't the way to type out your rap!

I rap faster than you fap,
and you've fallen for my trap
My words are like bullets,
and you drop like a WW2 Jap.

Get your head from the cloud,
Such an ego, it shoudn't be allowed
You rap faster than I fap?
Dude, why do you even watch?
Go back to your nursery rhymes and your hop-skotch.

So y'all can stop comparing ya skillz
cause ain't none like me, I dont do cheap thrills.
I go for the real stuff, from the heart of my bottom
And as for the l33t skillz, you can bet I've got 'em.

For this, I certainly must state,
The shit you dribble, the stuff that cats hate
It ain't "1337", it ain't fly
Now I'll leave you with this post, so you can wonder why.
 
ya'll need to quit bitchin
brb im going to tha kitchen
K now I'm back n' it's time ta fap
to the master
his come backs are fasta
better then yo copy pasta
i'll stick it in ya pooper like a whooper
I'm tha ace a spades
enjoy ya aids
you ******s aint got shit on Putin
so just gb2 ya WoW lootin
 
A quote reply to a Vikram Rap?
That's debating tactics, man, a trap
for the unwary, the teacher maybe, not you
Danimal's da animal - he's gonna eat choo
not debate and take you down bit by bit
it's a crushing victory, or else defeat.
 
I just wanted more rap from those two :D

WIN:
his come backs are fasta
better then yo copy pasta
i'll stick it in ya pooper like a whooper
I'm tha ace a spades
enjoy ya aids
you ******s aint got shit on Putin
so just gb2 ya WoW lootin

EDIT: My Counterattack;

So you think I'm gonna take that lying down?
I'm better than the rest, pound for pound.
I'll hit you back
drag you down ASAP
Dont need no guns
'coz when I'm done,
your ego will be under a bloody crust
Then i'll leave you and your "rap" to rust
Dont need no tools, words are enough
So buck up, fool, at least act tough!

Get your head from the cloud,
Such an ego, it shoudn't be allowed
You rap faster than I fap?
Dude, why do you even watch?
Go back to your nursery rhymes and your hop-skotch.
This ain't ego, bud, it's life
Like that time I did your wife
Why did I watch you fap? I never did;
Your girl told me under the influence of 'cid
But those stains were hard to ignore,
when it showed on that shirt you wore.

I ain't never seen rhymes so crass!
Here I am, Old school and upper class
And all you can kick up are those poems?
I never stop pumping, I'm like Jesse Owens
So I've laid it all down - cold hard facts
I coulda gotten personal, but I'm all for tact

or this, I certainly must state,
The shit you dribble, the stuff that cats hate
Don't you dare bring the kittehs into this
The felines love me, so you can kiss
my ass and say goodnight
unless you're lookin' to start a fight.

By the way Jintor,
stop being an interloper
You wanna spew rhymes, have no fear
Just come on over, it's safer here...


PS: No offence!
 
I'm seeing quoting shit where i'm supposed to see a rap
am I seeing 99 point Vikram using Danimal's crap?
You know that point by point aint the way this game is done
You've both been shot. By yourselves. Have fun.
This city aint safer
aint nowhere near it, fact
since Freeman, circle-strafer
came in without no tact
Still no excuses, not enough dudes
to hang with us in this crowd
we need more rappers, we need more foods
to attract a ZERG RUSH death cloud.
 
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