Getting a girlfriend.
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RabidJester
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I think there are two universal truths that must be recognized before you can attempt to "land" a girlfriend.
First off, women in general have no clue what they want. They might say they do, and they might even have a vague sense of what they think they should want, but on a deeper level they are a mess of conflicting ideas and emotional paradox. Once you accept this, you can begin to act with more confidence, knowing that it may not matter what you do, because the outcome is going to be pretty random.
Secondly, and more importantly, as this is true of pretty much everyone, is that people want what they can't have. It's the basic, driving force behind sexiness. For many people, they have been conditioned by too many movies so that they have a preconception about romance. If you are completely available to a person, they will naturally not think of you as desirable, because they already "posess" you in a way. Everyone seems to want the whirlwind romance where they are swept of their feet, or are doing the sweeping, and there needs to be an air of both mystery and success in that. There's less ego-boosting if you get together with someone who would fall over themselves to be with you. It's just the way some things are.
Now, there are some tricks and techniques that can be learned. All of these depend on subtlety and portioning. If you overdo it or are too anxious, it comes off all wrong and you end up farther away than you started.
If you want to start a relationship without being an asshole typical guy, there are some basic guidelines: culture, chivalry and cool. If you don't believe it, try to come up with three adjectives to describe Sean Connery or Johnny Depp, who women seem to universally love. Be well-read, don't be afraid to drop poetry in the smallest of appropriate portions, and appreciate the finer things in life, like beauty. Opening a door for a woman, when not turned into a big production, is a sweet thing that most will still appreciate. And finally, cool. Never seem desperate. You will lose right there. You have to let the woman come to the conclusion that she wants to be with you. Even if she's too shy to make the first move, if she decides she wants to be with you, she will give you signs and you can work off of that, but if you push it, she'll back off.
Of course, you can always just wait and eventually, if you keep your eyes open and get out in the world, you'll find that person who you can be with and love forever, who will compliment everything you do perfectly, and shares your passions. That's what worked for me, and I didn't even have to do anything to make it happen. Just sort of fell in my lap. The old adage is true, "You'll find it as soon as you stop looking".
Or as Kent Nerburn writes "Love has its own time, its own season, and its own reasons from coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it or reason it into staying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you."
First off, women in general have no clue what they want. They might say they do, and they might even have a vague sense of what they think they should want, but on a deeper level they are a mess of conflicting ideas and emotional paradox. Once you accept this, you can begin to act with more confidence, knowing that it may not matter what you do, because the outcome is going to be pretty random.
Secondly, and more importantly, as this is true of pretty much everyone, is that people want what they can't have. It's the basic, driving force behind sexiness. For many people, they have been conditioned by too many movies so that they have a preconception about romance. If you are completely available to a person, they will naturally not think of you as desirable, because they already "posess" you in a way. Everyone seems to want the whirlwind romance where they are swept of their feet, or are doing the sweeping, and there needs to be an air of both mystery and success in that. There's less ego-boosting if you get together with someone who would fall over themselves to be with you. It's just the way some things are.
Now, there are some tricks and techniques that can be learned. All of these depend on subtlety and portioning. If you overdo it or are too anxious, it comes off all wrong and you end up farther away than you started.
If you want to start a relationship without being an asshole typical guy, there are some basic guidelines: culture, chivalry and cool. If you don't believe it, try to come up with three adjectives to describe Sean Connery or Johnny Depp, who women seem to universally love. Be well-read, don't be afraid to drop poetry in the smallest of appropriate portions, and appreciate the finer things in life, like beauty. Opening a door for a woman, when not turned into a big production, is a sweet thing that most will still appreciate. And finally, cool. Never seem desperate. You will lose right there. You have to let the woman come to the conclusion that she wants to be with you. Even if she's too shy to make the first move, if she decides she wants to be with you, she will give you signs and you can work off of that, but if you push it, she'll back off.
Of course, you can always just wait and eventually, if you keep your eyes open and get out in the world, you'll find that person who you can be with and love forever, who will compliment everything you do perfectly, and shares your passions. That's what worked for me, and I didn't even have to do anything to make it happen. Just sort of fell in my lap. The old adage is true, "You'll find it as soon as you stop looking".
Or as Kent Nerburn writes "Love has its own time, its own season, and its own reasons from coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it or reason it into staying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you."
RabidJester
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pr0nking said:
Not always up on his suggestions, and his jokes seem corny and used car salesman to me, but it's the right idea.
m00b
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It's not like I know anything but here's what I think:
You don't have to be an asshole with a girl, but you have to be able to tell her "NO!" and "I don't agree!" Be tough but fair.
Also make sure you hit on the girl ASAP.
Don't stand arround being a good friend. Tell her you like he smile, eyes, hair etc. Don't say too much of that and don't lie!
You can be yourself but you must learn that girls dont like a girlyman. So don't act different with girls then you do with men arround. Don't be too carefull what you say and don't appologise too often. Don't follow her arround like a dog. Be a man, because they want a man not a woman.
You don't have to be an asshole with a girl, but you have to be able to tell her "NO!" and "I don't agree!" Be tough but fair.
Also make sure you hit on the girl ASAP.
Don't stand arround being a good friend. Tell her you like he smile, eyes, hair etc. Don't say too much of that and don't lie!
You can be yourself but you must learn that girls dont like a girlyman. So don't act different with girls then you do with men arround. Don't be too carefull what you say and don't appologise too often. Don't follow her arround like a dog. Be a man, because they want a man not a woman.
Ren.182
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To get my current girlfriend, i just leant over and kissed her. (Crazy i know but it worked)
Obviously i didn't just walk up to a complete stranger and kissed them, i got to know them first.
Been with her for almost 8 months now.
Obviously i didn't just walk up to a complete stranger and kissed them, i got to know them first.
Been with her for almost 8 months now.
Jangle
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m00b said:
thats the only way i can get hugs, kisses etc. from the girl i like. As soon as i tell her i fancy her she would just start acting all wierd around me and then eventually just completely ignore me.
Its happened before, and i'm not gonna have it happen again. I'm happy to stand around being a good friend if i get to be with her.
KoreBolteR
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i read that 80% of the boys that have girls as "friends", fancied them.
KoreBolteR
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Jangle said:
i doubt all the 80% wud keep quiet tbh.. LOL
there are a few who pour thier heart out to them when drunk or Even sober.
PvtRyan
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How hard? I mean, do I need to just slap her, or slam her face to pieces? Does it turn them on?
And isn't it a bit weird when you say hi, she says hi back, and then you start hitting her in the face ? Ah well, I guess I'll never understand women.
burnzie
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Girls pretend to like 'the nice guy' but really they do want someone who's a dickhead.
Also those pretty boy meto fags.
You know the ones.
Also i cant stand seeing a good looking chick... in arms with some goth ****wit wearing a top hat and a cape and eyeliner and lipstick. Seriouly wtf.
Also those pretty boy meto fags.
You know the ones.
Also i cant stand seeing a good looking chick... in arms with some goth ****wit wearing a top hat and a cape and eyeliner and lipstick. Seriouly wtf.
Slik
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I liked this girl since I was in my Freshmen year of highshool, I know that she likes me also because almost everyday when we have the chance, we always stare at eachother for a second or two...
and now I am a Senior and I did never talk to her. Now I see her every now then, and she still looks back.Time is running out for me..
I must be the shyest person in the world ;(
Edit: now that I am thinking about this, I am starting to hate myself..
and now I am a Senior and I did never talk to her. Now I see her every now then, and she still looks back.Time is running out for me..
I must be the shyest person in the world ;(
Edit: now that I am thinking about this, I am starting to hate myself..
BabyHeadCrab
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I slap bitches, but for some reason they dont have the undying urge to rail me in the bottom 
m00b
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Good luck masturbating.Jangle said:
Guys it's not about being a nice guy or not. You can still be a nice guy, you just have to show a woman that you are a man too. So give some compliments, smile at her, dare to talk to women. If you stand arround her long time without showing interest they will just think you're a coward.
You cant do much about how you look, but you can do a lot about how you act! Girls want self-confident men, not scared puppies!
Raziaar
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m00b said:Good luck masturbating.
Guys it's not about being a nice guy or not. You can still be a nice guy, you just have to show a woman that you are a man too. So give some compliments, smile at her, dare to talk to women. If you stand arround her long time without showing interest they will just think you're a coward.
You cant do much about how you look, but you can do a lot about how you act! Girls want self-confident men, not scared puppies!
I don't know about you, but nice guys are men too. Being rude, and a jerk does not make you more of a man. Heh, in my books it makes you less of a man, and more of an animal, and not the type of animalistic behavior decent women like!
Just because you're a 'nice guy', doesn't mean you can't give a woman a wild time, be strong and tough, or any of those things. Being a nice guy, in my books... means knowing how to treat a woman and others with respect.
Bullseye
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the funny thing about this is that most girls always talk about that ist's all about the inside ( on wich i partially agree) while they are usually the one who go for the muscular matcho rude guy. then the get treaten wrong but start again with the same thing.
(no offence to everybody here who trains at a gym or is very muscular. I just notice most of the people i see here are muscular idiots)
(no offence to everybody here who trains at a gym or is very muscular. I just notice most of the people i see here are muscular idiots)
Jangle
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m00b said:Good luck masturbating.
Guys it's not about being a nice guy or not. You can still be a nice guy, you just have to show a woman that you are a man too. So give some compliments, smile at her, dare to talk to women. If you stand arround her long time without showing interest they will just think you're a coward.
You cant do much about how you look, but you can do a lot about how you act! Girls want self-confident men, not scared puppies!
whats all this about masturbating? seriously, i find it a bit annoying that just because a guy doesnt have a girlfreind you think he should sit in his room playing with himself.
baron insig
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meh i just obsses about art
And see what they think of that and if they can take the fact that im into sitting on the floor in the middle of town drawing looking like a hobo then they are not just after me for my boyish good looks
i just obsses about artAnd see what they think of that and if they can take the fact that im into sitting on the floor in the middle of town drawing looking like a hobo then they are not just after me for my boyish good looks
The Dark Elf
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I don't get it.. It's a thread asking how to get a girlfriend, yet most seem to be avoiding the posts made by the girls.. I would have thought they know best with regards how to impress girls, being girls n all.
Or maybe thats just me, maybe Jim Single elsewhere in the thread knows it all, which is why he's single and posting advice on getting a girlfriend, and being single proves he knows what to do.. I'm so in awe of his experience.....
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But really, do you want a girlfriend or do you just want to have sex with someone of the opposite sex? I think a lot of younger people seem to get confused between the two, simply having a girlfriend just for showing off and getting laid.
Or maybe thats just me, maybe Jim Single elsewhere in the thread knows it all, which is why he's single and posting advice on getting a girlfriend, and being single proves he knows what to do.. I'm so in awe of his experience.....
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But really, do you want a girlfriend or do you just want to have sex with someone of the opposite sex? I think a lot of younger people seem to get confused between the two, simply having a girlfriend just for showing off and getting laid.
