HEV Suit Quotes...

[exoeight]

from another thread:

Hopefully the game will be so immersive that I'll forget to quicksave and just keep jugging along, regardless if the HEV is screaming at me to get a medpack.

which spawned the idea for this thread:

-------
it would be ultimate awsomeness, if the HEV suit got mad at you, and started making fun of the player, lol.

all in fun, can you guys come up with any good scenerios and quotes?

if you don't pick up a life pack
"omg, tard..."

or if you miss a shot...
"honestly!!"

lol, mine suck... come up with some good ones.

 

[[daniom]]

Gordon meets alyx - Then ythe suit says " Ohh, you got to check her out !" (Kind a Beavis and Butthead humor..)

 

[StardogChampion]

"Can't you jump any further than that GORDON?"

"That's it, I'M LEAVING YOU FOR ANOTHER MAN"

 

[Mr-Fusion]

Gordon meets alyx - Then ythe suit says " Ohh, you got to check her out !" (Kind a Beavis and Butthead humor..)

It's got to have the suits personality though!

"Warning - user erection imminent."

"Erection at maximum strength"

 

[AcousticToad]

"Watch were you're putting that battery Gordon"

"Remember, the HEV unit can store 30+ weapons, yet I can only carry 250 sub machine gun rounds"

"Floor hurts - You + Floor = Damage - Dont fall*

"Gordon you dick, you're not meant to shoot the scientists!"

"Hey there Mr. Marine, you like my crotch piece?

"Ever wonder what that hole on my back is for? So have I, lets figure out what fits in there...no...NO! Gordon take that out NOW!"

"If you weren't that stubborn, you would put on the damn helmet! It would stop them headcrabs latching on you idiot."

Mine suck too...

 

[Adrien C]

Haha, nice thread.

 

[Kiva128]

"why? why was I programmed to feel pain!?"

 

[Tyrsenus]

You flee from a puny headcrab --> "testosterone levels falling"

you shoot yourself in the foot, the HEV uses amx_slap Gordon

 

[czrsink]

"I wouldn't go around that corner if I were you, Gordon"
"Uh-oh, this looks sinister"
"Hehe, would you look at that fat c**t in the boiler suit"
"Don't you sometimes just think, 'I've had enough of this'"
"Would you like me to ask Alyx if she fancies you?"
"Ahh, you smell just as good as you did 10 years ago, Gordon"

 

[StardogChampion]

"Damn, it's getting sweaty in here"

"For God's sake don't fart!!"

 

[AcousticToad]

If Mike & Pete's sound pack was still going these would be cool in the game heh.

 

[Seppo]

It's got to have the suits personality though!

"Warning - user erection imminent."

"Erection at maximum strength"

Hehee! Thanks for the laughter of the day.

 

[kaellinn18]

Can't believe there haven't been any 2001 references:

"What are you doing, Gordon?"

"I'm afraid I can't allow that, Gordon."

 

[DrPowers]

"Excuse you"

 

[Pressure]

"Power at 50 Percent"

 

[czrsink]

"Half Life 2 will be released on September 30th 2003"

 

[AJ Rimmer]

After the player spends a few minutes too many just playing around instead of doing what he is sposed to;
You had better unf*ck yourself Gordon or I will unscrew your head and shit down you neck! Where in the hell are you from anyway? Black Mesa? Holy dog chow only steers and queers com from Black Mesa and you don't look much like a steer to me so that kinda narrows it down doesn't it?

 

[DrPowers]

"To the bat mobile"

 

[Kristafon]

Gordon stop creeping about, this isnt splinter cell you know, HEY ALIEN GUYS HE'S OVER HERE. There you are.

 

[Brian Damage]

"That headcrab over there is eyeballing us..."

"You're holding the crowbar by the wrong end..."

"Left! Left! I said LEFT, dangit! Not RIGHT!"

"Mmmm... yummy electricity..."

"I need a vacation..."

"Don't ask me, I'm just the suit..."

"Divide by cucumber error... please re-install universe and reboot!"

 

[kaf11]

i dont know, "user death imminent" is still my favorite.

 

[Stamp]

"administering Viagra"
"Broken arm detected, amputating... (crunch)"
(while fighting huge monster) "BATT LOW"
(while fighting huge monster) "Feaces compartment full. Relieving now."
"recycling urine into stomache"

 

[DrPowers]

"Friggin industrial lifts always shorting out my system"

 

[affen]

"Now the crotch wasn't designed for that Gordon"
"Don't tell me you're afraid of that strider!"
"Why don't we straight go to the citadel?"
"Stop fooling around or there won't be a HL³!"
"Shall I put some music on?"
"The combine shoot better than you-ou, the combine shoot better than you-ou!"
"Self-destruction in 5, 4, 3, ... haha, just kidding! 2, 1, ..."
"ROFL!"

 

[Dabs]

"Bite my shiny metal ass".

 

[jabberwock95]

I'd like to see the HEV suit crash. Maybe a blue screen of death...

 

[subtlesnake]

Imminent phallus enlargement - inertial dampeners activated.

 

[exoeight]

when talking to alyx:

"i don't think so, he's mine!!"

 

[pixartist]

hahhahaha awesome thread^^

"Smell the ashes"
"Gordon, please wear your glasses! you CANNOT AIM without them!!"

 

[BigWalnutZ]

After the player spends a few minutes too many just playing around instead of doing what he is sposed to;
You had better unf*ck yourself Gordon or I will unscrew your head and shit down you neck! Where in the hell are you from anyway? Black Mesa? Holy dog chow only steers and queers com from Black Mesa and you don't look much like a steer to me so that kinda narrows it down doesn't it?

first half of that movie is the best...i can ignore the rest

 

[exoeight]

"omg! omfg >_< *! wtf!? .... wtF!?* whyyy!!!"

bsd.

 

[StardogChampion]

Can't believe there haven't been any 2001 references:

"What are you doing, Gordon?"

"I'm afraid I can't allow that, Gordon."

Yeah, that'd be funny. It'd have to have HAL's voice though, or it just wouldn't be the same!

 

[mung]

"First aid protocols disengaged, morphine administered."

"Morphine administered"

"Morphine administered"

"Morphine admistered. Morphine supply at low levels, please contact administrator or HEV technician for refill."

"Morphine administered. Heart rate 284 bpm. Heart Failure Imminent"

"Morphine administered."

"User death imminent"

"Heart activity ceased. Please seek nearest defibrillator or certified medical personel."

"Morphine administered."

 

[DrPowers]

"Language translator system damag..101001010111010100100100100
0111101001001010101010101111111"

 

[DrPowers]

In sexy voice:
"Your CD is ready!"

For those of us that use blindwrite.

 

[jabberwock95]

"First aid protocols disengaged, morphine administered."

"Morphine administered"

"Morphine administered"

"Morphine admistered. Morphine supply at low levels, please contact administrator or HEV technician for refill."

"Morphine administered. Heart rate 284 bpm. Heart Failure Imminent"

"Morphine administered."

"User death imminent"

"Heart activity ceased. Please seek nearest defibrillator or certified medical personel."

"Morphine administered."

lol, "Please seek nearest difibrillator".

I'd like to hear: "User death imminent. User is now dead. If you would like to lodge a complaint, please contact your nearest HEV representative."

 

[DrPowers]

"This is a trial version of HEV suit 2.0. HEV suit system will be operative in 30 seconds. Would you like to register."

"It looks like your trying to kill a zombie..." (play off of "It looks like your writing a letter" paperclip from crosoft)

"hahaha they actually got you to sign the waver"

"Gordon, your quite good at turning me on..." -Simpsons

 

[rkef]

"Operating system update available. Connecting to ftp.kernel.org ... success. Downloading ... success. Patching kernel ... success. OMG Gordon isn't GNU/Linux fantastic? It's a good thing they froze Patrick Volkerding's and Linus Torvald's heads. LOL sorry Gordon, geeked out there, for a sec. ... Gordon? How come we never go out any more?"

and

"You are getting sleeeeeeepy..." (old mac reference, doubt many will get that )

 

[Wilco]

"I've never told you this before, and I'm not implying anything, but this is actually the female version HEV suit."

 

[AJ Rimmer]

Power at 100%. Mmmmm... power...