I Feel Dirty...

[Tab]

5 bucks says he didn't read a word of it

Yes, I did read it. I posted my opinion. If you think thats normal than I respect your opinion.

 

[bliink]

And Icarus - you intrigue me... Care to divulge any more?

I believe I can help there!
I can't say!™

 

[DarkStar]

i'm a trekky

AhaHHahhhaAHHAhahhaha.




Oh.....sorry.

 

[KNoX]

.................that statement or whatever is probebly the best thing i have ever heard on these forums since i joined. i do not intend to post agian bye HL2 net i used to be known as undercover bob but then i got banned i really think you have a point. will posting on this forum ever really do anything for me??!?! did the 1000$$ upgrade really do anything for ME. no..... its a fact it has done nothing at all for me.... I will play HL2 like the rest of you but was all these hours on these forums digging for info usefull at all? once again bye nice knowing you im gonna go outside and play soccer

 

[Alientank]

I spend lots of time on my PC but my gf doesn't think I'm a geek at all, she likes me just how I am. I also go out with her a lot though, hang out with her, dress very nice, etc. So I'm kinda geeky but not.

 

[ne0_shiny]

But el Chi! It'll be the best game ever!

 

[FoB_Ed]

I am sat here, staring at this screen with a grand total of 3,361 posts, an average of 6.85 a day and it suddenly occurs to me that I feel quite dirty and displeased with myself.

I have just watched a 6 minute-long fan-made trailer comprisied of footage I have seen God knows how many times and, despite its impressiveness, I really do wonder what the hell I was doing? Why am I acting like I care so much? Why have I invested so much time and effort in learning about this game and hanging onto so many details? Why oh why do I care?

And before you say "But el Chi! It'll be the best game ever!" I don't doubt that, but it can't help nag at the back of my mind that I've spent far too much energy in caring about this. I've never followed the making of any game, album, book or film this much. I don't care how special an experience it will be - and games are becoming experiences in the same way people never forget their favourite film or book or play - I can't shake this feeling that I've hit a low. I mean to say, I've spent all this time on these forums - and don't get me wrong, many of you are extremely good people - and whilst some of the discussion in Off-Topic has been interesting, the discussion I've put into discussing the game itself seems pathetic.

And now, as we approach the release date, I find myself thinking that these next few days are going to be long. I maybe felt that way to an extent about the last couple of albums I bought, but somehow not quite as much. I have uni work to attend to and I know it's going to be tough to tear myself away from this game to get it done, and I'm not the most willful person at the best of times.

At the moment I'm "seeing" this girl, but she's away for the weekend so I can't see her right now. I won't see her on Monday because I'm going home from uni for the night to give in CVs to get a job over Christmas. But I'm back on Tuesday evening. Will I see her then? Or will I fob her off saying I'm shattered and play HL2 instead? However sh*tty that sounds, I know I'll be tempted. Like I said, hitting a low...
The other day, as part of the playful verbal abuse we exchange she called me a "geek trapped in a cool person's body" and she's right, actually. And she doesn't even know how much time I've spent here, or playing computer games or the money I've invested in upgrading my PC.

This has just crept up on me the last few days I suppose, but mostly right now. I think I'm going to have to face facts that, pretty soon, I'm going to have to leave the forums and calm down a bit. There's only so much one can talk about this game. Maybe I'd just stay in Off-Topic and debate, but then they never go anywhere and, whilst it's interesting to hear other people's views, it's also infuriating.

I know it's been a long post, and if you've gotten this far then I thank you for bearing with me. I just felt I had to let all this crap loose and obviously you folks are the people it's most relevant to.

Does anyone else feel similarly at all?

Dude, I know exactly how you feel. I felt like I've wasted my entire life sitting in front of a screen, and a month or so ago I just started going out and actually doing stuff instead of being a complete computer nerd. Hell, I'm not even excited for HL2 anymore. I can't play a game for more than an hour before I get bored and ancy.

I think I've gotten one of those "lives"

 

[PvtRyan]

And Icarus - you intrigue me... Care to divulge any more?

Shhhh.... Icarus knows something we don't know, what he knows that we don't know, we don't know, but we know he knows something we don't know.

 

[Phisionary]

I feel that. I got sick of it, and stopped coming here for about 8 months. Then I got over that. I no longer post in the Half-Life2 discussion forums, becuse it's a game and will be good, and will come out eventually. Whatever. I now usually post in off-topic (and Politics, now), because it's an enjoyable place where you can express yourself and have good discussions and mindless banter that is fun. Any activity is only useful in that you make money, enjoy yourself, or improve yourself or others. I usually enjoy myself when I'm here, an I improve my typing/writing skills infinitesimally. So is it worth the time I spend here??


...well, actually... no. Bye now.

 

[oldagerocker]

Dude, I know exactly how you feel. I felt like I've wasted my entire life sitting in front of a screen, and a month or so ago I just started going out and actually doing stuff instead of being a complete computer nerd. Hell, I'm not even excited for HL2 anymore. I can't play a game for more than an hour before I get bored and ancy.

I think I've gotten one of those "lives"

What you say makes little Billy cry ;(

 

[el Chi]

Depressed or not, you need to get out. Many wont agree with me because many are in the same situation you are. Thinking about playing HL2 over being with your gf. Thats sad.

Yeah, I think you're missing still something. I do get out and have a decent social life and friends etc. but I have still spent a lot of time on these forums and I'm basically wondering if it's been time wasted. That's an extremely cut-down version of what I've partly been worried about - partly - because I think sheepy may be right and that you didn't read what I said through properly. I don't entirely blame you. Like Farrow said, "the rantings of a strange Londoner"
I know it's sad to contemplate playing HL2 over seeing me lass. It was partly formed out of anticipation, partly from laziness and partly from the fact that I'm a sad c*nt - that was the whole point of my post and this thread. On the other hand, I'm also a randy little sod, so I may well see her - depends partly on her :naughty:

Shhhh.... Icarus knows something we don't know, what he knows that we don't know, we don't know, but we know he knows something we don't know.

Perfectly put!

 

[Baal]

i believe what you said is in the centre of many gamers' minds... true gamers, at least. personally i despise the casual gamers and are severely critical of those who dismiss the decent games in favour for something sub - par yet "fun".

this is really a double edged sword- for its hard to see where the "casual" gamer ends and the "l337" gamer begins. while i myself have great amusement with GTA:SA, i also despise those who do the same thing, but wear the tag of a "casual" gamer. when someone from my school commented on halo2 being crap and GTA:SA being a great game, i dismissed his opinion as invalid as he fell into the classification of being "casual". yet i have heard many of my fellow forumites say the same thing, and i have greeted them with a formal and supported answer, fully appreciating what they say. Both of them i do not know, but yet i feel that one has a more valid opinion that the other because one spends his time on a PC and the other at a Ps2.

strange.

*edit* dont worry i'll stop talking like an intelectual soon enough ( lol, check out this peice of random bullshit ) its just a phase im goign through. strange how the glooming aura of the night affects me on less than a subconsious level, though completely disdinguishes my dialouge, language and thoughts on a completely random level. What the F*CK did i just say? i believe i said that night makes me change the way i behave randomly... hmm.... im f*cked up.

Sometimes you guys can make so much sense it's scary.

Why can't I meet people like this in real life?

Well...I suppose I have a few, but still..

You really did make a great point to say anyone who claims either Halo 2 or San Andreas is "crap" to be a casual gamer, or ignorant. Even if your opinion is that it is "crap," does that mean it's a bad game? 99% of the people who play it disagree with you, so it shouldn't be. Saying any game that is one of the greatest games ever is crap, makes you a casual gamer in my opinion....A true gamer would reconize a game's greatness for what it is....Even if Halo 2 isn't as good as Half-Life 2 in most respects, there's no denying it's an amazing game.

 

[CyberSh33p]

Yeah, I think you're missing still something. I do get out and have a decent social life and friends etc. but I have still spent a lot of time on these forums and I'm basically wondering if it's been time wasted. That's an extremely cut-down version of what I've partly been worried about - partly - because I think sheepy may be right and that you didn't read what I said through properly. I don't entirely blame you. Like Farrow said, "the rantings of a strange Londoner"
I know it's sad to contemplate playing HL2 over seeing me lass. It was partly formed out of anticipation, partly from laziness and partly from the fact that I'm a sad c*nt - that was the whole point of my post and this thread. On the other hand, I'm also a randy little sod, so I may well see her - depends partly on her :naughty:


Perfectly put!

Despite the fact that I am the last person to determine what is normal as opposed to what isn't, I'd say you're not too much of a freak here el chi. So you have a hobby. Think about what else you would be doing for a second - you can't spend every waking moment "out". It doesn't happen. If you did, I guarantee you would eventually get tired of your friends and such and remain indoors anyway. Its simply a hobby. If not HL2, it would probably be television, which is even less sociable than forums or games.

It doesn't sound like you're abandoning people for this game or anything, it just sounds to me like you are feeling guilty because there are some times when you would rather stay in rather than go out, and stuff like this. I say don't worry about it too much, we're not all cast from the same proverbial mold, some of us waste our time with games, some television, some just are constantly out at some party or another, some go to the gym constantly. We all have hobbies.

I'm trying to cover the whole wide range and such here, but hopefully you can glean a useful sentence or two from there.