If your penis can talk to you,

[Dalamari]

Something like this

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s7WlzgN6COk[/youtube]

 

[<RJMC>]

"now is my turn!"

 

[Beerdude26]

Penis: "Start thinking about vaginas. Right. Now."
Me: D:

 

[-Psy-]

Thread of the month. No, make that the year. Sod it, make the best thread evar!

*to hand*
"Make <3 to me".

 

[Dekstar]

I think mine would only know one word. it would just say it in different ways and tones.

"pika pika?"

 

[Evo]

"pika pika?"

'deka deka'

:O

:naughty:

 

[Smoke]

Boo boo.

 

[Xendance]

"I will smoke you like a cuban cigar!"

 

[ailevation]

I don't like those ****ing sleeping bags you force on me!

 

[Sir Phoenixx]

"In Soviet Russia, Penis jacks you off!"

 

[guitars savior]

"why is your girlfriend such a bitch to you every two seconds, but so damn nice to me?"

 

[Majestic XII]

ACK!! ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!! ACK ACK ACHHHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???!ACK!! ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!! ACK ACK ACHHHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???!ACK!!

ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!!


ACK ACK ACHHHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???!

ACK!! ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!! ACK ACK ACHHHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???!ACK!! ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!! ACK ACK ACHHHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???!ACK!! ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!! ACK ACK ACHHHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???!

ACK!! ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!! ACK ACK ACHHHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???!ACK!! ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!! ACK ACK ACHHHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???!ACK!! ahhhhk ack ack ack? ACK AAAACKKK!!!! ACK ACK ACHHHK ack ackkkkkkk!!!! ack ack? ack ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!! ack ack AHHHHK AAAAAHHH AAAHHHHH ACK! ACK!???

 

[Vegeta897]

I lol'd.

 

[Baal]

"Stop drinking so much water"

I had about five washroom breaks today at work.

 

[Tyguy]

Why am I smaller than other penises?

 

[-Psy-]

Tyguy penis wins.

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

:E

McNeal did it I SWEAR. Wasn't my penis. It just told me so.

 

[Sulkdodds]

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way--in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

There were a king with a large jaw and a queen with a plain face, on the throne of England; there were a king with a large jaw and a queen with a fair face, on the throne of France. In both countries it was clearer than crystal to the lords of the State preserves of loaves and fishes, that things in general were settled for ever.

It was the year of Our Lord one thousand seven hundred and seventy-five. Spiritual revelations were conceded to England at that favoured period, as at this. Mrs. Southcott had recently attained her five-and-twentieth blessed birthday, of whom a prophetic private in the Life Guards had heralded the sublime appearance by announcing that arrangements were made for the swallowing up of London and Westminster. Even the Cock-lane ghost had been laid only a round dozen of years, after rapping out its messages, as the spirits of this very year last past (supernaturally deficient in originality) rapped out theirs. Mere messages in the earthly order of events had lately come to the English Crown and People, from a congress of British subjects in America: which, strange to relate, have proved more important to the human race than any communications yet received through any of the chickens of the Cock."

Me: SHUT UP!

 

[lePobz]

pussy!
pussy!
pussy!
PUSSY!
PUSSY!!
pussy?
piss!
PISS!
ahhhh
pussy!
pussy!
PUSSY!
pussy?
wank

(repeat)

 

[Evo]

'Peniiowned'

 

[Sir Phoenixx]

"I'm a Penis, I'm a Penis, I'm a Penis
I'm a Penis, I'm a Penis, I'm a Penis
I'm a Penis, I'm a Penis, I'm a Penis
OH OH OH I'm a Penis"

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

'Peniiowned'

Much <3 my brotha.

 

[JNightshade]

"Why does my mouth taste like ass?"

 

[Wanted Bob]

"Well, who is THIS???"

 

[victor]

jnightshade wins

 

[Geogaddi]

Two penises walk by a gay bar, one says to the other "Wanna go get shit faced?"

 

[McGooTheWise]

"Penis sauce?"

:|

 

[mindless_moder]

"God DAMN IT MAN show some restraint"

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

"Chocolate? CHOCOLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATE?!"

 

[Omega11]

"The Friction, It Burns Me!!! And Those Blisters On Your Hand... WHYYY???
Oh, And I Should Let You Know, That Hooker Left Me A Parting Gift You Jackass!!!"

 

[Dinkleberry]

"FFS, sweetcorn for dinner again!?!"

 

[victor]

geogaddi comes second

 

[brink's]

"when are u going to call the doctor about that viagra subscription"?

 

[K e r b e r o s]

Well considering the amount of times I spend masterbating every other day, the first sentence would almost certainly sound like this:

"BBBLLEEEEH" *spurtsquirt* "BLEH" *spurt* "blehhh" *oooze* "bleh" *dribble*

I, actually, would grow to hate that.

 

[Tyguy]

"Can somebody give me a god damn haircut!?!?"

 

[Bad^Hat]

"I'm a penis! I'm a penis! Suck my dick! I'm a penis!"

 

[Tyguy]

"I'm a penis! I'm a penis! Suck my dick! I'm a penis!"

Are you implying that a penis ALSO has a penis?

Does that mean there are an infinite number of penises?

 

[guitars savior]

well duh

 

[mindless_moder]

"what Am I ??? What Am I??"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_8yPap-k_s