I'm An Idiot

[kirovman]

About a month ago, I was having dinner at my college cafeteria dealy, and they give you ceramic plates instead of paper or styrofoam or small boxes or what have you. So I finish eating, but there's still a bit left, so I think "Okay, I'll just throw this food out... and I'll put this plate in the garbage too, no sense leaving it on the table."

So. I walk over, but instead of putting the food in the garbage, I put it in a recycling bin used exclusively for pop cans. I then proceed to do a "dramatic" disposal of my "disposable" ceramic plate, so I lift it high above my head and drop it onto the small hole for pop cans. It shatters EVERYWHERE, makes tons of noise, and the caf lady who cleans up the tables turns around and stares at me from across the cafeteria. I stand there frozen for about ten seconds, then slowly crouch down, pick up the large pieces of plate that are now on the floor, walk over to the garbage, throw the plate out, and walk out without saying a word.

I did something similar at the University Halls cafeteria, but instead, I put the plate at the top of a huge pile of plates.

I walk out of the kitchen area and a couple of seconds later, it all falls down.

I walked out quickly.

Then the next couple of days: "Hey it's that guy who broke the plates!" "Cool!"

 

[Puzzlemaker]

I did something similar at the University Halls cafeteria, but instead, I put the plate at the top of a huge pile of plates.

I walk out of the kitchen area and a couple of seconds later, it all falls down.

I walked out quickly.

Then the next couple of days: "Hey it's that guy who broke the plates!" "Cool!"

Haha.

 

[bam23]

I was eating french fries while talking to someone. I had a brain fart and dipped my finger in the ketchup.

 

[Bad^Hat]

Bah, still can't think of any good ones for myself...

My friend wanted to dye his hair once, but all he had was white house paint.





Uhh.... yeah >_>

 

[Que-Ever]

Me and my friend were drawing on a transparency with the special pens you use... anyway, we noticed that it kept coming off the sheet onto our hands, so we were like, we could use this to make temporary tattoos or something like that. So I drew somehting on real dark, and he pressed it to the back of his hand, and it showed up but it was a little light, so I was just gonna darken it up a little bit with the pen when I realized... we could've just ****ing drawn it on. This was last week.

Then of course, there's always...this...

 

[Unfocused]

I was eating french fries while talking to someone. I had a brain fart and dipped my finger in the ketchup.

Did you bite it off?

 

[Higlac]

i hit the back end of a boat trailer on halloween. not my fault but i think im gonna get screwed over for it.

 

[JNightshade]

funny in and of itself, but that last line killed me

It killed her too XD

 

[Smoke]

I drank dirty, blacky green bong water for £3.

Took me 3 gulps and 2 chews.

 

[AKIRA]

Me and my friend were drawing on a transparency with the special pens you use... anyway, we noticed that it kept coming off the sheet onto our hands, so we were like, we could use this to make temporary tattoos or something like that. So I drew somehting on real dark, and he pressed it to the back of his hand, and it showed up but it was a little light, so I was just gonna darken it up a little bit with the pen when I realized... we could've just ****ing drawn it on. This was last week.

Then of course, there's always...this...

dude wtf are you from PLANETDOOM.COM?!?!:| :| :|

 

[Que-Ever]

Um... well, I used to be on the forums there, but hardly at all now. I don't know what in that post would make you say that, though...?

BTW, I just looked at that picture of my leg all naked and hairless... oh, it's so horrible.

 

[Raziaar]

I remembered one stupid thing I did. I was doing something as a kid, and I had a lighter... I put the lighter down on a rock, and smashed it with another rock. There was a loud bang, and I hurt my hand. I'm just lucky there was no ignition spark to set off the gas, because as seen on mythbusters, which reminded me of this event, there can be quite the fire flareup which could have caused me some burns, and possibly lit my clothes on fire depending on what they were made out of.

Heh.

 

[AKIRA]

Um... well, I used to be on the forums there, but hardly at all now. I don't know what in that post would make you say that, though...?

BTW, I just looked at that picture of my leg all naked and hairless... oh, it's so horrible.

i remember you posting that pic on planetdoom and people commenting on your hairy legs lol

 

[Boogymanx]

This one time a girl I fancied was lying on my chest and I wanted to say "I like you" but couldn't and I said "Your head is on my keys." To this day I still hate myself for that.

 

[Raziaar]

This one time a girl I fancied was lying on my chest and I wanted to say "I like you" but couldn't and I said "Your head is on my keys." To this day I still hate myself for that.

I like you?


Don't worry, your line was far more original.

 

[Boogymanx]

I like you?


Don't worry, your line was far more original.

But oh so idiotic.

 

[Raziaar]

But oh so idiotic.

You should of been smoooooooooth and turned the statement around.



"Your head is on my keys."

"Your what? huh?"

"The keys to my heart baby, the keys to my heart. I'd like for you to have them."



Hahahaha. :cheese:

 

[Unfocused]

You should of been smoooooooooth and turned the statement around.



"Your head is on my keys."

"Your what? huh?"

"The keys to my heart baby, the keys to my heart. I'd like for you to have them."



Hahahaha. :cheese:

Haha, real smooth. :cheers:

 

[Dynasty]

Ohhhh dear...you might aswell just have flopped it out if you were going to say that hahaha.

 

[Higlac]

I remembered one stupid thing I did. I was doing something as a kid, and I had a lighter... I put the lighter down on a rock, and smashed it with another rock. There was a loud bang, and I hurt my hand. I'm just lucky there was no ignition spark to set off the gas, because as seen on mythbusters, which reminded me of this event, there can be quite the fire flareup which could have caused me some burns, and possibly lit my clothes on fire depending on what they were made out of.

Heh.

Don't get me started with my lighter stories...

Have you ever melted a penny?

 

[Smoke]

We once put NAPALM on a camp fire....it burned for 6 hours...