Portal Update - Hidden achievement & Viral Riddles [Updated]

The Monkey said:
*blip*
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I haven't looked through all the pages yet, but I'd like to give a heads-up to anyone else working on this, I think I might be pretty close at making it easy to determine what's being said in the audio in this file. Edit: I think I can hear Alyx talking in it, but it has this strange alien sound that I'm trying to work out of it.
 
1267669454832.png


This is interesting.
 
...I disagree.

I see no resemblance at all. It's just a lower pixel picture of Glados, flipped 45 degrees. What's supposed to be the connection? It kinda looks like D0g, but I think we're just wishing there was more to it than there actually is. This happens when Valve does viral marketing, people see things that mean nothing, and over-analyze a simple picture.
 
The party escort submission position? So we are obviously being dragged off by the Party Escort, who is taking us to a "party". GlaDOS is still alive, hello?

And as far as HL3 integration, the ASHPD is a crappy weapon. Why would you want it to fight the Combine? It's GREAT for solving puzzles, provided that the puzzle is designed to be solved using it! It has no real-world use unless you need to teleport yourself or an object across a very short distance. You literally couldn't escape a paper bag with it. Try shooting down one of those hybrid dragonfly/Apache helicopter things with it. Good luck with it under water too. It's about as useful in HL3 as a shower curtain.



Don't get me wrong, I will take a sick day to play P2, and I am as glued to this ARG stuff as anybody. I'm just not with the Ep3/P2 combo crowd.
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The Combine would destroy the entire human population to get its' hands on Aperture Science portal tech. They arguably spared the human race solely for the purpose of getting the Xen-style portal technology. You think it was for stalkers and human meat? The only reason why the planet isn't dust is because of Black Mesa.

no real-world use
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You are completely incorrect for reasons that are logistical, tactical, strategic, economic, scientific, practical, hilarious, and obvious.
 
I summarized because of the extremely high volume of uses that are possible for a self-contained portal gun. I do mind stating them all. But I'll blather off a few that come off the top of my head.

Portal hydroelectric generators. Instead of rivers, you just use the same falling water, forever.
Removing all the air from the world by shooting one portal at the ground and one at the Moon.
Travel expenditures around the world cut by trillions.
Theme parks.
Moving armies, weapons, food, robots, whores instantaneously.
Intelligence gathering.
Wormhole guillotine.
Suicide.
Communication and power lines only need to go a few dozen feet instead of thousands.
Surround sound.
Narcissism.
Whole new genres of sporting events. Extreme Portal Bowling.

You all know you want to see Advisors play some Extreme Portal Bowling.

What use could there be specifically in Half Life Ep. 3? Oh, I don't know, how about everything that's been said here before? Skipping entire levels and killing everything with little effort.
 
But for gameplay, all of that power would be worse than using noclip to beat the game. There's no challenge, and the dynamics it would bring to the game are just too ridiculous to THINK about building into it.

Besides, I think the point of portal was to show that they only figured out how to open portals on certain surfaces. (Completely flat ones.)

I dunno. maybe in that case it could be used, but there are a lot of flat surfaces in Half-Life 2, and its episodes. It would still be a bit ridiculous for gameplay.

Cheers for me doing a big 360 in one post. Don't I get an award for that?
 
Mikael Grizzly said:
Some People want Episode 3, not Portal 2.
Click to expand...

There you go, fixed that for you.

Call me prescient, psychic, whatever, but here's what's going to happen:

1) Valve are going to announce Portal 2.
2) People are going to go batshit insane about it not being Episode 3, in spite of there being no mention of Episode 3 whatsoever. These are the same people that have been recolouring and redrawing the ASCII Portal images in a desperate attempt to pull some non-existent Episode 3 meaning out of them.

Some people want Episode 3 rather than Portal 2. That's fine, and perfectly understandable. What's not is the aforementioned straw-clutching that these people are doing.
"IT MUST BE EPISODE 3! IT MUST! IT HAS TO BE! SQUINT HARDER!"
Talk about setting yourself up for a fall.
 
Mikael Grizzly said:
People want Episode 3, not Portal 2.
Click to expand...

This. Although there are a great many people who would welcome Portal 2 with open arms, most of the community would much rather see Episode 3 come first thanks to the ridiculously long wait and silence about the project. We're probably not going to get it, though, and as usual people will fly into a rage when they don't get Episode 3.

Isn't it funny how easily Valve can rally the masses of fans together? A simple, discreet, cryptic update and people are going batshit.
 
After I thought about it.

Can I have both Portal 2 AND Episode 3?

As insane as that may sound.
 
MFL said:
I summarized because of the extremely high volume of uses that are possible for a self-contained portal gun. I do mind stating them all. But I'll blather off a few that come off the top of my head....Moving...whores instantaneously....Wormhole guillotine... Suicide....
Narcissism.....Whole new genres of sporting events. Extreme Portal Bowling... You all know you want to see Advisors play some Extreme Portal Bowling.

What use could there be specifically in Half Life Ep. 3? Oh, I don't know, how about everything that's been said here before? Skipping entire levels and killing everything with little effort.
Click to expand...

This is great... I lold
 
Just a request: make Portal 2 longer. In my humble opinion, Portal is the most fresh and interesting IP from Valve since Half-Life 2. Professional magazines, reviewers and critics praised it, so Valve should invest more on the Portal franchise, because the first one was really too short. All these viral advertising could show that Portal is now much more than a pretty puzzle game.
 
Didn't what's-his-face say in an interview that there won't be any Ep3 content this year?

Portal 2 for sure.
 
Once upon a time, there was a little boy, with an impending birthday.

For his birthday, this little boy wanted Transformers. However, his parents had been hinting a lot in recent weeks that he was likely to receive Power Rangers. In fact, they didn't mention Transformers at all.

On his birthday, the little boy went to his first present and carefully tore open a corner. Underneath the bright, shiny wrapping paper, he could clearly see the letter "P"
So what did he do?
Did he accept the Power Rangers, albeit in a slightly disappointed way, knowing that there were likely to be Transformers in the future?
No, instead he tried to convince himself that the "P" was actually a "T" and that, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary, that there really were Transformers in the box.
 
Pi Mu Rho said:
Once upon a time, there was a little boy, with an impending birthday.

For his birthday, this little boy wanted Transformers. However, his parents had been hinting a lot in recent weeks that he was likely to receive Power Rangers. In fact, they didn't mention Transformers at all.

On his birthday, the little boy went to his first present and carefully tore open a corner. Underneath the bright, shiny wrapping paper, he could clearly see the letter "P"
So what did he do?
Did he accept the Power Rangers, albeit in a slightly disappointed way, knowing that there were likely to be Transformers in the future?
No, instead he tried to convince himself that the "P" was actually a "T" and that, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary, that there really were Transformers in the box.
Click to expand...

LOL, this.
Danimal said:
Didn't what's-his-face say in an interview that there won't be any Ep3 content this year?

Portal 2 for sure.
Click to expand...

no it wasn't in an interview, that was just a prickish rumor that seemed to be circulating in some web circles.
 
I agree with Pi. Do I get my transformers now?
 
Noodle said:
I don't care, I'll buy whatever the hell they publish.
Click to expand...

Except with the possible exception of L4D3 if its released before september

Whole new genres of sporting events. Extreme Portal Bowling.
Click to expand...

In homage to Stargate SG1, I was thinking more along the lines of Extreme Golfing; The longest drive comes to mind

Long distance relationships and webcams would be rendered a thing of the past.
 
So this is all going to happen the day before my birthday?

...Waaaaait... Valve, you aren't throwing me a party, are you?
 
For those interested...from the sound files from the radios which were converted to images (dino1-26 etc...) two of the images have been traced to this flickr account.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/twosevenoneonenineeightthreesevenatenzerosix/
Here is the proof - dinos laid on top of the original images.

dino22and23origin.jpg

You think that is weird? Owner of the flickr account - Adam Foster. Maker of Minerva, rumoured to be working on Episode 3 after being picked up by Valve.
 
Personally I'll be disappointed when it turns out its Portal 2. After my first playthrough Portal just became incredibly uninteresting.
 
Foster has run similar ARG games himself for Minerva, obviously the community was a lot smaller so it didnt get as much press, but he released screenshots and back story fluff using similarily stealthy methods.
 
TollBooth Willie said:
Personally I'll be disappointed when it turns out its Portal 2. After my first playthrough Portal just became incredibly uninteresting.
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You should already be disappointed because it will be about portal 2 hence everything related to portal lol.
 
Maybe. I'm just going to let it all build up and when the news finally does break that it is in fact Portal 2 I'll just let loose a shitflinging fury of disappointment the likes of which not even the HL2.net steam chat has ever seen.
 
TollBooth Willie said:
Maybe. I'm just going to let it all build up and when the news finally does break that it is in fact Portal 2 I'll just let loose a shitflinging fury of disappointment the likes of which not even the HL2.net steam chat has ever seen.
Click to expand...

Pre-emptive banning in 5...4...
 
Pi Mu Rho said:
There you go, fixed that for you.

Call me prescient, psychic, whatever, but here's what's going to happen:

1) Valve are going to announce Portal 2.
2) People are going to go batshit insane about it not being Episode 3, in spite of there being no mention of Episode 3 whatsoever. These are the same people that have been recolouring and redrawing the ASCII Portal images in a desperate attempt to pull some non-existent Episode 3 meaning out of them.

Some people want Episode 3 rather than Portal 2. That's fine, and perfectly understandable. What's not is the aforementioned straw-clutching that these people are doing.
"IT MUST BE EPISODE 3! IT MUST! IT HAS TO BE! SQUINT HARDER!"
Talk about setting yourself up for a fall.
Click to expand...

... or a Rickroll... the likes of which the world has never seen.
 
Pi Mu Rho said:
Once upon a time, there was a little boy, with an impending birthday.

For his birthday, this little boy wanted Transformers. However, his parents had been hinting a lot in recent weeks that he was likely to receive Power Rangers. In fact, they didn't mention Transformers at all.

On his birthday, the little boy went to his first present and carefully tore open a corner. Underneath the bright, shiny wrapping paper, he could clearly see the letter "P"
So what did he do?
Did he accept the Power Rangers, albeit in a slightly disappointed way, knowing that there were likely to be Transformers in the future?
No, instead he tried to convince himself that the "P" was actually a "T" and that, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary, that there really were Transformers in the box.
Click to expand...
No one is suggesting that there won't be a Portal 2, Charles, what is being speculated is that it will be released alongside EP3, based on the fact that this was the case with their prequels, and the mentions, albeit small, of the HL universe in the recent developments.

It's true, these expectations may be based more on hope than on critical analysis of the situation, but that doesn't mean they are completely unrealistic.
 
The Monkey said:
No one is suggesting that there won't be a Portal 2, Charles, what is being speculated is that it will be released alongside EP3, based on the fact that this was the case with their prequels, and the mentions, albeit small, of the HL universe in the recent developments.

It's true, these expectations may be based more on hope than on critical analysis of the situation, but that doesn't mean they are completely unrealistic.
Click to expand...

I didn't suggest that they were?
I'm merely pointing out the rampant, baseless speculation that is only like to lead to disappointment. Followed, of course, by the inevitable (and utterly stupid) backlash.
 
The Monkey said:
No one is suggesting that there won't be a Portal 2, Charles, what is being speculated is that it will be released alongside EP3, based on the fact that this was the case with their prequels, and the mentions, albeit small, of the HL universe in the recent developments.

It's true, these expectations may be based more on hope than on critical analysis of the situation, but that doesn't mean they are completely unrealistic.
Click to expand...


superluser said:
Pattern?

There are two data points!

extrapolating.png
Click to expand...

According to him, you can't make patterns out of stuff like that.
 
I am going to be soooooooooooooooo disappointed if this isn't day of defeat source 2!
 
My money is on Left 4 Dead 3: The Legend of Francis electric boogaloo.
 
If a new Orange Box is going to be released, that is Portal 2 + Ep3 + all the previous HL2 games as bonus, I'm hoping for the long awaited PC enhancements previously released on the XBox 360.
 
PaoloM said:
If a new Orange Box is going to be released, that is Portal 2 + Ep3 + all the previous HL2 games as bonus, I'm hoping for the long awaited PC enhancements previously released on the XBox 360.
Click to expand...

Why do you do this? Why?
You're just creating expectations, that are ultimately not going to be met.
 
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