The best Monty Python sketch

[The Monkey]

Which Monty Python sketch do you consider to be best? Scenes in the three movies are included.

 

[Mr Stabby]

the hungarian phrase book sketch in 'And now for something completely different'

 

[Orgonomist]

I've always been fond of the Pantomime Horse sketch.

 

[Fieth]

Spam, dead parrot, or sex ed on the meaning of life movie.

 

[Toffee]

I can´t remember which I liked most..But in the Monty Python and the Holy Grail the scene where King Arthur fought The Black Night was totally hilarious!

 

[The Dark Elf]

I can´t remember which I liked most..But in the Monty Python and the Holy Grail the scene where King Arthur fought The Black Night was totally hilarious!

haha yes that was a good scene

-

I like most of the Python stuff, only a few I found boring, those were mostly from the very last few episodes of the series. The rest was gold.

 

[Dux]

Killer Rabbit, Dead Parrot and Spam ftw ! Also, gotta mention Holy Hand Grenade. Still makes me giggle like a prat.

 

[KagePrototype]

"This guy won't haggle!"

Ministry of Silly Walks is a funny one as well.

 

[The Dark Elf]

Killer Rabbit, Dead Parrot and Spam ftw ! Also, gotta mention Holy Hand Grenade. Still makes me giggle like a prat.

Then did he raise on high the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch, saying, "Bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy." And the people did rejoice and did feast upon the lambs and toads and tree-sloths and fruit-bats and orangutans and breakfast cereals ... Now did the Lord say, "First thou pullest the Holy Pin. Then thou must count to three. Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither shalt thou count two, excepting that thou then proceedeth to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the number of the counting, be reached, then lobbest thou the Holy Hand Grenade in the direction of thine foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it."



classic

 

[Direwolf]

I bet no one will expect my answer....
The Spanish Inquisition!
Nah, really I think any of the ones mentioned in this thread are probably the tops. I have a Silly Walks poster on my wall.

 

[KagePrototype]

I bet no one will expect my answer....

As soon as I read that, I did.

 

[burnzie]

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUASITION!


THe Holy hand grenade of antioch would have to be my fav... but the rest of the stuff is still bloody hillarious...

 

[OmegaX]

the machine that goes BING!

 

[RRunner]

I fart in your general direction.

 

[The Dark Elf]

Aaaaalbatros!

 

[Hapless]

Conquistador Coffee.

"The owner is hiding in my bathroom *bang* The owner WAS hiding in my bathroom"

 

[The Dark Elf]

Pasted up for the fun of it

The Original Monty Python SPAM Skit

From the second series of "Monty Python's Flying Circus"
Transcribed 9/17/87 from "Monty Python's Previous Record" by Jonathan Partington

Scene: A cafe. One table is occupied by a group of Vikings with horned helmets on. A man and his wife enter.

Man (Eric Idle): You sit here, dear.

Wife (Graham Chapman in drag): All right.

Man (to Waitress): Morning!

Waitress (Terry Jones, in drag as a bit of a rat-bag): Morning!

Man: Well, what've you got?

Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam bacon spam tomato and spam;

Vikings (starting to chant): Spam spam spam spam...

Waitress: ...spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam...

Vikings (singing): Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!

Waitress: ...or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay
sauce served in a Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines
garnished with truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.

Wife: Have you got anything without spam?

Waitress: Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it.

Wife: I don't want ANY spam!

Man: Why can't she have egg bacon spam and sausage?

Wife: THAT'S got spam in it!

Man: Hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?

Vikings: Spam spam spam spam (crescendo through next few lines)

Wife: Could you do the egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam then?

Waitress: Eewwww!

Wife: What do you mean 'Eewwww'? I don't like spam!

Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

Waitress: Shut up!

Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

Waitress: Shut up! (Vikings stop) Bloody Vikings! You can't
have egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam.

Wife (shrieks): I don't like spam!

Man: Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your spam. I love it. I'm having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam baked beans spam spam spam and spam!

Vikings (singing): Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off.

Man: Well could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then?

Waitress: You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam... (but it is too late and the Vikings drown her words)

Vikings (singing elaborately): Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam spam spam!

 

[oldagerocker]

The sketch in Meaning of Life where the fat guy eats the very little mint... i've never been able to forget that, fantastic.

 

[JohnnyBeverage]

The sketch in Meaning of Life where the fat guy eats the very little mint... i've never been able to forget that, fantastic.

I like that one too. I also like the scene from the holy grail where they have to answer questions of be pitched over the side.

I also like the scene from "Life of Brian" where the guy kills a bunch of people for no apparent reason, dont remember why he was doing it.

 

[axeil]

What about the world's funniest joke?

That's a great one. Or the part in Life of Brian where the people are chasing him and they end up at the naked guy's hole in the ground.

 

[Hapless]

Vince : Well one day I was sitting at home threatening the kids, and I looked out of the hole in the wall and sees this tank drive up and one of Dinsdale's boys gets out and he comes up, all nice and friendly like, and says Dinsdale wants to have a talk with me. So he chains me to the back of the tank and takes me for a scrape round to Dinsdale's. And Dinsdale's there in the conversation pit with Doug and Charles Paisley, the baby crusher, and a couple of film producers and a man they called 'Kierkegaard', who just sat there biting the heads of whippets and Dinsdale sayd 'I hear you've been a naughty boy Clement' and he splits me nostrils open and saws me leg off and pulls me liver out, and I said my name's not Clement and then he loses his temper and nails my head to the floor.

Interviewer : (off-screen) He nailed your head to the floor?

Vince : At first, yeah

 

[snark^]

NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise... surprise and fear...fear and surprise.... Our two weapons are fear and surprise...and ruthless efficiency.... Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency...and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope.... Our *four*...no... *Amongst* our weapons.... Amongst our weaponry...are such elements as fear, surprise.... I'll come in again. (Exit and exeunt)

 

[dys4iK]

Definitely "confuse-a-cat."

 

[The Dark Elf]

Vince : Well one day I was sitting at home threatening the kids, and I looked out of the hole in the wall and sees this tank drive up and one of Dinsdale's boys gets out and he comes up, all nice and friendly like, and says Dinsdale wants to have a talk with me. So he chains me to the back of the tank and takes me for a scrape round to Dinsdale's. And Dinsdale's there in the conversation pit with Doug and Charles Paisley, the baby crusher, and a couple of film producers and a man they called 'Kierkegaard', who just sat there biting the heads of whippets and Dinsdale sayd 'I hear you've been a naughty boy Clement' and he splits me nostrils open and saws me leg off and pulls me liver out, and I said my name's not Clement and then he loses his temper and nails my head to the floor.

Interviewer : (off-screen) He nailed your head to the floor?

Vince : At first, yeah

roflmao, brilliant hahaha.. that sketch was on paramount just the other week.. damn funny lol.. and the giant hedgehog (deep southern voice) "diiiiinsdaale!"

 

[PunisherUSA]

Fetch the comfy couch!
And the world's funniest joke. Translators (for german) were only given one word each. One accidently heard two of the words and was hospitalized.
The mad barber? CUTCUTCUTCUT!!

 

[jheaddon]

Good old python, always been a fan of life of brian, now for something completely different and the holy grail, class

 

[Ecthe|ioN]

I just love everything about Monty Python. I recently purchased "Monty's enzyklo Pythonia" containing the DVD's: "Life of Brian, The Quest for the holy Grail, The Meaning of Life" and Bonus material. A great collection, and a must-have for all you Python-fans.

I'm currently looking for some flying circus on DVD, but haven't found anything yet. I hope they start selling it soon though. Monty Python is totally priceless.

 

[The Monkey]

I kinda liked The scene in Holy Grale where John Cleese kills 20 people to save his "princesess" and then becomes friend with the king. But all Monty Python is awesome.

 

[john121]

i saw a DVD special with every single skit from the flying circus here in the U.S. for about $107.99 i think. I might get it if I get a gift card from best buy. (my fav. has got to be the actual meaning of life in "the meaning of life")

 

[The Dark Elf]

i saw a DVD special with every single skit from the flying circus here in the U.S. for about $107.99 i think. I might get it if I get a gift card from best buy. (my fav. has got to be the actual meaning of life in "the meaning of life")

The weird elephant butler thing in the fish poem segment creeps me out.. it just don't look right lol

 

[Hapless]

Without a doubt, the absolute funniest, silliest, laugh-out-loud, rolling on the floor sketch is "The Fish Slapping Dance." Pure hilarity. Just remembered it.

 

[Shippi]

Oooh, fishy, fishy, fishy, fish? That went wherever I did go!