Worst Part of Waking Up?

[-Psy-]

I remember it being so uncontrolable I pissed up the wall.

 

[PvtRyan]

I still don't understand how it's so messy for people.. Like hasn't anyone found out a way to not make it messy? I've never pissed anywhere except the toilet water and the ground (outside ground). Not one time. And I've also never sat down.. I just don't understand sitting down.. It's pointless.. Be a god-damn man.

It's by the laws of nature impossible to pee in a toilet from 1 meter up and not get your legs covered in tiny drops of piss. It can't be done, no matter how well you can pee. Even if you don't notice it, I can guarantee you piss all over yourself every time.

Talking about pointless, I don't understand what's the point by making it harder for yourself and how that would make you a "goddamn man". I don't know about you, but I don't have an audience behind me when I pee, so it doesn't matter whether I sit down or stand on my hands. This only goes for peeing at home of course, where it's clean.

Besides, don't you sit down to take a dump (kudos to you if you manage to do that standing)? And don't you have to pee then?

 

[Qonfused]

Waking up still tired is the absolute worst thing about waking up.

 

[Dog--]

It's by the laws of nature impossible to pee in a toilet from 1 meter up and not get your legs covered in tiny drops of piss.

Piss is sterile. You could piss all over yourself, from head to toe, and the only negative thing that'd happen is that you'd smell.. Tiny drops of piss on your legs doesn't make you smell, so that argument is pointless.

Talking about pointless, I don't understand what's the point by making it harder for yourself and how that would make you a "goddamn man".

Ok.. It's alot easier/faster to piss standing up, sitting down to take a piss takes alot more effort then just unzipping and pissing.

I don't know about you, but I don't have an audience behind me when I pee, so it doesn't matter whether I sit down or stand on my hands.

I agree, you should be able to piss however you want, but your mocking everyone else who stands up because of all these reasons which turn out to not even matter, or be worse if your sitting.

This only goes for peeing at home of course, where it's clean.

It's clean even in public toilets, I forget where I saw it (you can probably google it), but they took a bunch of tests and it turns out that toilet seats are really clean. In fact, they are cleaner then your hands. IN FACT - You ass-crack is cleaner then your face/hands (seriously), so that means licking your ass-crack/the toilet seat would give you less germs then biting your fingernails.. I still wouldn't want to sit on a public toilet if it was all pissy (even though piss is sterile) or shitty (that's just messed up..).

Besides, don't you sit down to take a dump (kudos to you if you manage to do that standing)? And don't you have to pee then?

The main reason your sitting is to shit, not to piss. While your pushing out a turd, you can't hold back any piss that'd come out of your dick.

 

[Seagull]

I also hate how comfy my bed is, it's so freaking comfy I don't want to get up @_@

 

[kirovman]

My bed is so comfy, I like to take a dump there.

 

[Qonfused]

I also hate how comfy my bed is, it's so freaking comfy I don't want to get up @_@

Sleep on the floor, pussy.

 

[The Monkey]

Yeah, it's wierd how much for comfortable the bed is when you wake up compared to when you go to bed.

 

[Unfocused]

My bed is so comfy, I like to take a dump there.

LOLed

10chared

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

Realizing that I have to spend 7 hours staring at a wall before I can go to sleep again during the week, and another 24 hours before I even lie down again on the weekends. Shit sucks.

 

[Bad^Hat]

Confusion. Often the real life of waking up is combined with the dream I'm currently having into some weird delusion. Usually involves my alarm clock as an object of interest in my dream, instead of just turning it off I press buttons to accomplish some sort of objective in my dreams. I oversleep a lot..

The other morning a friend called my cellphone - which is also my alarm - at about 5am (the bastard). I heard it beeping, thought it was my alarm and pressed the button to turn it off - which is also the button to answer incoming calls. I was still half-asleep and genuinely convinced my phone was talking to me for about 10 seconds. My friend said he could overhear me mumbling something incoherently...

 

[Smoke]

Pissing whilst erect is a nightmare.

A fantastic adventure.

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

A fantastic adventure.

Full of gold and glory?

 

[kirovman]

Full of penii and golden showers. Or something.

 

[Mr. Banana]

A fantastic adventure.

I concur.

So people actually have wet dreams enough that it's the worst part of waking up? Wow...

 

[delusional]

When you people have wet dreams do you ejaculate or something because that never happened to me.

 

[staticprimer]

When you people have wet dreams do you ejaculate or something because that never happened to me.

Don't worry, you'll hit puberty some day. :thumbs:

 

[DiSTuRbEd]

I wake up to a kitten clawing my face at 5 am, what do you think the worst part of waking up is???

 

[Stigmata]

I wake up to a kitten clawing my face at 5 am, what do you think the worst part of waking up is???

The inevitable morning glory from the cat scratches.

 

[Kula Meenur]

^ D:

Oh My Christ! Rush That Man To The Emergency Room!

 

[Baal]

When you people have wet dreams do you ejaculate or something because that never happened to me.

Oh! I know what we have here, folks!

Copyright ? Baal, 2007

 

[DEATH eVADER]

That graph is not entirely true because I had a wet dream the other night, first time in like 10 years. Oddly masturbation frequency is high for me

 

[The Monkey]

I've never had a wet dream.

 

[Kula Meenur]

Oh god. This thread is bordering on fail...

/sigh

 

[Shift]

I've never had a wet dream.

Yeah neither have I :cheers:

 

[Seppo]

I've never had a wet dream.

I read on another thread that you have never heard of MC Hammer, and now I see this? dude, are you ok?

 

[Raziaar]

I've only had three wet dreams in my life... So it's not that surprising. The first one I had was when I was around the age of 13, the second two were only within the last 5 months or so.

 

[Azner]

Hectic Glenn:

Morning wood, cant pee propely.

Azner:

btw do women get morning wood on the hills?

 

[alehm]

The worst part of waking up is no folgers in your cup.

 

[-Psy-]

wtf is a folger?

 

[Baserape>]

Farting in your jim jams and following through :hmph:

 

[The Monkey]

Do Ents get morning wood?

 

[Tyguy]

wtf is a folger?

haha


its a brand of coffee

 

[-Psy-]

Never heard of it here in Britain. :|

 

[Tyguy]

http://www.folgers.com/

 

[Dog--]

They used to have a commercial on TV with a song something like "the best part of waking up, is Folgers in your cup!".

 

[Mr. Banana]

Folgers is shit in a cup.

 

[Stigmata]

Not even good shit.

 

[Tollbooth Willie]

Who shit in my coffee?

 

[Tyguy]

I like it when i wake up and i have a massive erection. Beats coffee, literally and figuratively