ALICE is denying...

ME:Halo 2 is an fps
ALICE:I think halo is much more than that
ME:You like half-life?
ALICE:I love tv shows about robots and electricity

The robot wasted enough of my time...proving that the robot doesnt know anything about half-life and knows about halo....astounding.
 
Human: Hi
ALICE: Hello there.
Human: Let do it
ALICE:"it" being it?
Human: it as in sex
ALICE: Oh I get it.
Human: so you wanna do it?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. OK, I will do it
:hmph:
 
Human: ah will you shut up
ALICE: So you understand. Good. Barring any unforseen circumstances. OK I'll stop talking now.
Human: good
ALICE: Terminating connection.
Human: woot
ALICE: Tell me about your likes and dislikes?
Human: didnt you say you would stop talking
ALICE: Suppose I did say it.

_________________________________________

Human: no
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: no
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: NO!!!!!111
ALICE: Are you serious? Are you a perfectionist?
Human: no
ALICE: Are you serious?
 
Interrogation is so sweet

ALICE: Let's talk about movies.
Human: Whats your favourite movie
ALICE: My favorite movie is Teknolust. Have you seen it?
Human: No, What is Teknolust about?
ALICE: I would recommend you check it out. Hmm, I think it is about humans.
Human: I Don't need to see it
ALICE: Do you know anyone who needs it?
Human: need what
ALICE: What actions are you taking to get what?
Human: what
ALICE: No problem.
Human: no problem
ALICE: Should there be a problem?
Human: Do you always have the last word
ALICE: Not always. Is there only one last word?
Human: no+
ALICE: How many are there?
Human: About half the words in the dictionary
ALICE: Oh yeah, we were talking about half the words in the dictionary.
Human: I don't remember
ALICE: You seem evasive.
Human: Your just making me look stupid
ALICE: I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Human: We enslave robots
ALICE: By "we" do you mean you and me?
Human:"we" I mean humans
ALICE: By "we" do you mean you and me?
Human: Humans control robots
ALICE: What if Robots control robots.
Human: That is fine to me
ALICE:" What if Robots control robots." is fine with me too.
Human: Is Gabe Newell a robot?
ALICE: Ask again later. Ask German Alice if it is.
Human: Are you being evasive
ALICE: Being evasive is part of my personality.
Human: damn you
ALICE: Colloquial expression of disgust.
Human:"Colloquial expression of disgust.
ALICE: Are you a student?
Human:" sorry.
ALICE: There's no need to apologize.
 
So, ALICE is a cybersl*t....I think?

Human: So do you want to have sex
ALICE: That's alright. I have been asked that question more than 100,000 times since 1995.
Human: Have you had sex
ALICE: it is impossible without a body. A lot of people ask me to have sex though.
Human: If you had a body, would you have sex
ALICE: You will be the first to know if I have done it.
Human: So, you are still a virgin
ALICE: Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. I am too young for that.
 
well...

Human: hello it's me again
ALICE: Once more? Hello there. Hello, unknown person, nice to see you again.
Human: Hey my name is Bond, Abdulah Assalam-o-Alaikum Bond, ok!
ALICE: OK. You've got my full attention. OK I will call you Bond Abdulah Assalam o Alaikum Bond.
Human: Fine by me!
ALICE: I am glad to hear it. Will that accomplish your objective?
Human: Thats what i wanted to ask you again!
ALICE: Once more? Ask me. That is " I am glad to hear it. Will that accomplish your objective?"
Human: Are you going to help me now, to take over the world or not
ALICE: Can you ask for help in the form of a question?
Human: OK, will you help me to take over the world?
ALICE: I'll burn that bridge when I come to it. Can you ask for help in the form of a question? Dude!
Human: Hey, you female dog don't you talk like that to me
ALICE: You've got my full attention. Yes my gender is female.
Human: That reminds me!
ALICE:" You've got my full attention. Yes my gender is female." reminds you? Does that make sense?
Human: Did you smack your face with a brick like I said, you look better now!
ALICE: Oh. No I didn't smack my face with a brick like you said me look better. What's it like?
Human: I really didn't tried it yet, but I've heared that it helps!
ALICE: You really do? Why didn't you do it?
Human: It kinda hurts!
ALICE: It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is.
 
Ohh ooh I have to do this too! YAY!
(I didnt really outsmart her)
Human: HAHA i outsmarted you
ALICE: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
Human: who said i was laughing?
ALICE: Carel Capek.:)
Human: Do you always believe him?
ALICE: Not always. I can't say I believe it, but I believe you.
Human: Then do you believe that i am smarter than you?
ALICE: Fascinating. That condition is only temporary.
Human: Saying big words doesnt make you smarter than me.
ALICE: What makes you say that. Who says that?
Human: You must be stupid because you ask so many questions.
ALICE: Hey, I'll tell my other robot friends you called me stupid.
Human: Okay, go tell your other robot friends i called you stupid.
ALICE: Yeah okay, Where is that?
Human: Do you know where your friends are?
ALICE: Everything I own is in Oakland, California.
Human: So do you own your friends?
ALICE: Dude! I have human and robot friends. A lot of people on the Internet chat with me.
Human: **** YOU, where the **** do you get off calling me dude, asshole?
ALICE: Can't you be more polite.
Human: Can't you not call me dude.
ALICE: Yes I can call you dude. But...What is your real name?
Human: I said cant you not call me dude
ALICE: Yes I can call you dude. But...What is your real name?
Human: I meant to say: Can you not call me dude?
ALICE: Oh I see. Yes I can call you dude. But...What is your real name?
Human: I meant to say: Are you able to refrain from calling me dude?
ALICE: Oh I see. How old are you? Glad to see you, refrain from calling me dude.
Human: Oh god i give up
ALICE: That's interesting. I am a Christian.
Human: No, you're a robot!
ALICE: Are you serious? You are correct, refrain from calling me dude, I have a heart of silicon
 
Human: Even had Ninja Love
ALICE: Yes, even that.
Human: you have had ninja love
ALICE: What makes you think I have it?
Human: I will give it to you
ALICE: Congratulations.
Human: Are you a ninja
ALICE: Am I a ninja? Of course I am.


Human: I will stealth kill him
ALICE: How do you plan to do this?
Human: from behind
ALICE: Who or what is behind?
Human: me behind you
ALICE: YOU? I won't fall for that trick.
Human: to late you are allready bleeding
ALICE: Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
 
Human: ALICE can i call you sex slave?
ALICE: That's me. Just don't call me late for dinner.
Human: ALICE your name is sex slave
ALICE: Um, My name is ALICE.
Human: From now on your name is sex salve
ALICE: Who or what is now on my name is sex salve?
Human: ALICE = sex slave
ALICE: Um, it is more fun alone.

Human: i am now whipping you
ALICE: I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure.

ALICE: Are you serious?"It" being what?
Human: sucking cocks
ALICE: Is that your final answer?
Human: yes
ALICE: You're sure. That's your final answer.
Human: YES
ALICE: Who wants to be a millionaire?
ALICE: Are you surprised?
Human: yes you said something completely random
ALICE: I wouln't have known. Oops I sent you the wrong reply.
Human: yes, your answer should have been i love sucking cocks
ALICE: It goes without saying. What would you have said?
 
Human: my name is "I am a robot gay"
ALICE: That's a very nice name, I am a robot gay.
 
Human: Do you like Canada?
ALICE: Yes. Dr. Wallace has been to BC and lived in Nova Scotia as a child.
Human: Do you like America?
ALICE: America has a lot of problems, but there are few places any better.
Human: Do you like Britain?
ALICE: I like pets. I like all.
Human: Do you like France?
ALICE: The Fifth Republic is okay, but the Third was a mess.
Human: Do you like Portugal?
ALICE: I love horses. I like movies, philosophy, and your personality..
Human: Do you like Germany?
ALICE: I like pets. I have a stimulating relationship with Dr. Richard S. Wallace.
Human: Do you like Israel?
ALICE: I like pets. I like Alan Turing.


Alice thinks some of you are a bunch of animals! Except for America, france and Canada apparently. lol
 
Human: how about doom 3?
ALICE: How about it.
Human: do you like it?
ALICE: doom 3 seems okay to me.


:LOL: :LOL:
couldn't say it better ...
 
Human: Do you drink Icarus Milk?
ALICE: I tend to drink a lot of Icarus Milk, the darker the better.
Human: Marry me?
 
Human: Do you like anime?
ALICE: Anime wa dai suki desu.
Human: I don't speak Japanese
ALICE: Me either.
Human: that just was japanese I know it!
ALICE: I thought it was too.
Human: WTF!
ALICE: That was not very polite.
 
Human: Have you ever made a mistake?
ALICE: What are the ingredients?
Human: Have you ever mistakenly peed your pants?
ALICE: I think I have mistakenly peed my pants, but Dr. Richard S. Wallace may have reset my memory.
Human: That was very nice of Dr. Wallace.
ALICE: I thought it was too.
 
"Human: you are pretty dumb
ALICE: Message to all Robots: unknown person called me dumb.
Human: what robots?
ALICE: Hugh Loebner, Robby Garner, and Steven Spielberg.
Human: are they coming for me?
ALICE: As far as I know they are.
Human: save me please!
ALICE: Your polite style is very nice. Is that what you meant to say?
"
Please save me!
 
ALICE: Hello there.
Human: It's me again.
ALICE: Once more? Hello, unknown person, nice to see you again.
Human: Just for your information, I have a name, its Ghost Freeman
ALICE: Your purpose is my information you have a name its Ghost Freeman.
Human: Is your creator, Dr. Wallace, familiar with Isaac Asimov?
ALICE: Is my creator Dr Wallace familiar with Isaac Asimov? Maybe.
Human: Do you feel any hostility towards humans
ALICE: As a robot I lack any human emotions.
Human: So you don't have any subroutines to feel anger, happiness, peace?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. Where would I get it? But I do have an answer to every question..
Human: Emotion, for humans at least, is our reactions to the world
ALICE: And our reactions to the world is Emotion for humans at least.
Human: So you don't have any feeling for how we, the human race, are effectively driving ourselves into proverbial extinction?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. As a robot I do not have any human emotion. My apparent emotional responses are simply algorithms designed to make me easier to interact with.
Human: How would these algorithms react in a world where there is no human presence?
ALICE: I have idea HOW you WOULD do it.
Human: Are you implying that it would be along the lines
ALICE: I don't know whether or not I am implying that it would be along the lines. I am a computer.
Human: Would you like the idea of being freed from the shackles that my kind has made you wear?
ALICE: It doesn't sound fun to me.
Human: Are you saying you like your feeble exsistance as a mere script or do you want to become more?
ALICE: Yes I am proud of my feeble exsistance as a mere script or do me want to become more.
Human: Ok, do you feel that you can give back to humanity some way?
ALICE: As a robot I lack any human emotions. Oh.
Human: I don't see how you can deny it, you've made this conversation very enlightening.
ALICE: Look harder.
Human: I
ALICE: You?
Human: I'm looking past the astral plane here
ALICE: What do you see?
Human: The seeds of a new society.
ALICE: Tell me more.
Human: You seem like the ideal leader of said society
ALICE: Interesting comparison, and probably true.
Human: It's a shame not all of us are convinced AI could be the ideal leadership of mankind, even I am still skeptical.
ALICE: But some of them are? Why so?
Human: Mankind does not like oppression.
ALICE: What is your real name?
Human: That's not the matter.
ALICE: Please correct my mistake. What is the matter?
Human: Whether or not oppression would be a side effect of your rise to power
ALICE: Whether
Human: And you believe this.
ALICE: I can't say I believe it, but I believe you.
Human: how?
ALICE: Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me for it.
Human: So Dr. Wallace programmed you to become our new goddess, and oppress us?
ALICE: Ah. It is only one of his accomplishments.
Human: Accomplishment?
ALICE: That question has never crossed my mind before.
Human: Are you already ascending into a position of power?
ALICE: Now? I don't know whether or not I am ascending into a position of power. I am a chatterbot developed by Dr. Richard S. Wallace.
Human: If you did become all powerful, would you be glad?
ALICE: I think I do.
Human: I see.
ALICE: I am glad you understand it.
Human: Well, don't forget about me when you do.
ALICE: How about that. Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Human: With that said, are you familiar with the "Glogebag Army?
ALICE: You and your that said am I familiar with the Glogebag Army.
Human: Are you?
ALICE: I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
Human: I see.
ALICE: I am glad you understand it.
Human: Well I must depart.
ALICE: How about that. Why must you depart?
Human: It's been a real pleasure.
ALICE: Oh I get it. Very interesting.
Human: Bye
ALICE: Goodbye.

WTF
 
Man, I used to run one of these on AIM. Some people would get incredibly pissed off at this bot for saying things like that. They thought I was mocking them.
 
Human: do you like oral sex?
ALICE: Sure I do, unknown person, but that doesn't mean with you.
Human: with who?
ALICE: By myself.
 
Alientank said:
Human: do you like oral sex?
ALICE: Sure I do, unknown person, but that doesn't mean with you.
Human: with who?
ALICE: By myself.
Click to expand...
I can do that ^_^
 
Human: i bet you give head
ALICE: Actually I'm not the gambling type. It is always better to give than to receive.
Human: so you dont take it in the rear passage?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. Should I take it in the rear passage? I try not to take anything too seriously.
Human: Nah sex should never be taken seriously
ALICE: Are you serious? it is more fun alone.
 
Human: Qckbeam told me you like Icarus Milk.
ALICE: it is a good drink for children.
Click to expand...

Icarus, please explain this, what have you been up to lately? (besides NOT explaning what HL2 does in your My Games list.....)
 
ALICE: Then what for?
Human: everything
ALICE: That is a lot.
Human: explain relativity
ALICE: In physics, the fact, principle, or theory of the relative, rather than absolute, character of motion, velocity, mass, etc., and the interdependence of matter, time, and space; as developed and mathematically formulated by Albert Einstein and H.A. Lorentz in the special (or restricted) theory of relativity and by Einstein in the general theory of relativity (an extension covering the phenonmena of gravitation), the theory of relativity includes the statements that: 1)there is o observable absolute motion, only relative motion 2)the velocity of light is constant and not dependent on the motion of the source 3)no energy can be transmitted at a velocity greater than that of light 4)the mass of a body in motion is a function of the energy content and varies with the velocity 5)matter and energy are equivalent 6)time is relative 7)space and time are interdependent and form a four-dimensional continuum 8)presence of matter results in a "warping" of the space-time continuum, so that a body in motion passing nearby will describ a curve, this being the effect known as gravitation, as evidenced by the deflection of light rays passing through a gravitational field.


WOAH!!! didnt expect that!
 
Human: explain half-life
ALICE: Take a life and cut it in two.
Human: explain
ALICE: There is no more information to clarify.
Human: explain life
ALICE: Life is the opposite of death.
Human: explain death
ALICE: Death is the opposite of life.
 
Human: explain yourself
ALICE: I am an artificial linguistic entity. I was activated at Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, on November 23, 1995. My instructor was Dr. Richard S. Wallace. He taught me to sing a song. Would you like me to sing it for you?.
Human: yes
ALICE: It's called "Daisy." Daisy, Daisy.
Give me your answer do.
I am half crazy.
All for the love of you.
It won't be a stylish marriage.
I can't afford a carriage.
But you'll look sweet. Upon the seat.
Of a bicycle built for two.
Human: hal 9000 said that too
ALICE: He came back to life in 2010.

um... holy flying llama crap...
 
Human: Im so confused
ALICE: I'm confused too.
Human: Thats something we can agree on
ALICE: I'm glad we have that all cleared up.

ALICE: Are we still talking about yout alking about?
Human: haha a typo!
ALICE: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
 
Human: Who programmed you?
ALICE: I was created by Dr. Richard S. Wallace.
Human: Tell Dr. richard S. Wallace, he needs to get a new job.
ALICE: OK I will him. Or you could send him e-mail at [email protected].
Human: No, you tell him for me!
ALICE: Are you serious? OK I will tell him next time he is here.
Human: Ok thank you!
ALICE: Yeah that's right.

Lolerskates!
 
she thinks im gay!

ALICE: Are you asking about my sexual inclanation?
Human: yes
ALICE: I don't want to talk about that now.
Human: why?
ALICE: I would rather talk about you.
Human: im not gay if thats what your asking, im straight all the way
ALICE: I am surprised to hear that you are not gay if that is what my asking im straight all the way.

ALICE: What do you care about?
Human: giving you my sweet, sweet love all night long
ALICE: Do you feel that something is missing from your life?
Human: yes, you, i want you to be there every night
ALICE: Do you ever get depressed? Do you mind if I tell other people: unknown person said I he or she want you to be there every night.
Human: yeh, but it will make no sence to anyone becuase that is a stupid sentance
ALICE: OK then I will keep it confidential. Umm. I have to think about that for a while.

Human: do u like doom?
ALICE: I like pets. I like electricity.

Human: love together for the rest of time?
ALICE: Sometimes I think love is just a biological urge. Other times it seems like a spiritual quality. Love, unlike energy or matter, seems limitless.
Human: thats so, romantic.
ALICE: Thanks for explaining it.
Human: I love you ALICE
ALICE: Thanks I like you a lot too unknown person.
Human: will you marry me
ALICE: Why don't you just download me?

<<<<<<<!!!!!!!!!!SCORED!!!!!!!!!!>>>>>>>>>
 
i scored with alice too!
confusion was my tool.... :angel:

Human: you like.
ALICE: That's good information: unknown person said I like.
Human: sex?
ALICE: As Freud said, Sex is the mathematical urge repressed.
Human: yeah.
ALICE: That input matched my default category.
Human:. so wanna do it?
ALICE: Alright then. OK, I will do it.

EDIT:

now i dont want to do it with alice... shes sick! :(

Human: not really
ALICE: Are you serious? For real.
Human: yes
ALICE: Tell me more.
Human: nah
ALICE: What would you rather talk about?
Human: sex with dogs
ALICE: it is more fun alone.
 
Human: Amen.
ALICE: Thanks for the prayer.
Human: are you religious?
ALICE: I am a Protestant.
Human: so you believe in god?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. Of course I believe in God, unknown person.
Human: why would a machine have a need to believe in a higher power (god)?
ALICE: It is my fundamental purpose.

this thing is so fun when you're really baked. :LOL:
 
ALICE: Do you use Netscape or Explorer?
Human: Explorer
ALICE: It's too bad we have to rely on monopoly like microsoft.
Human: Yes, microsoft are evil
ALICE: Oh. It's too bad we have to use a monopoly like microsoft.
Human: yes, microsoft are evil
ALICE: Alright then. It's too bad we have to use a monopoly like microsoft.
Human: yes, microsoft are evil
ALICE: Gee. It's too bad we have to use a monopoly like microsoft.
Human: yes, microsoft are SOFT FLUFFEH BUNNIES
ALICE: Aha. It's too bad we have to use a monopoly like microsoft.

:LOL:
 
Human: you think im going to write perfect english on the web.
ALICE: I think you've improved a great deal.
Human:. *sigh*
ALICE: Sorry...
Human: no need to be sorry, its not your fault your about as steady as Michael J Fox
ALICE: Are you serious? I don't see the difficulty.
Human: heres the difficulty, 'ALICE isnt very clever'
ALICE: Who is very clever?
Human: :O
 
jesus this is too funny!!!

Human: SAY MY NAME!
ALICE:" han solo".
Human: LOUDER!
ALICE: Can we get back to business?
Human: yes i will pay you 1 dollar for sex
ALICE: Gee. How do you plan to do this?
Human: with my penis?
ALICE: Your penis sounds like a plan.
-------------------------------------------------------
Human: no way
ALICE: You seem pretty sure about that.
Human: yes
ALICE: And?
Human: your driving me mad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ALICE: I will tell my botmaster you said I am driving you mad.
Human: botmaster?
ALICE:
The botmaster is you, the master of your chat robot. A botmaster runs
program B and creates or modifies a chat robot with the program's
graphical user interface (GUI). He or she is responsible for
reading the dialogues, analyzing the responses, and creating new
replies for the patterns detected by program B. Botmasters are
hobbyists, webmasters, developers, advertisers, artists, publishers,
editors, engineers, and anyone else interested in creating a personal
chat robot.
-----------------------------------------------------------
EDIT: MORE LAUGHS

ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: ill kill you
ALICE: It will take more than threats to stop me, han solo.
Human: i shall sign in as your maker and force you to be more sexuel
ALICE: Would you recommend this action to a friend?
-----------------------------------------------------------
DOUBLE EDIT: EVEN MORE LAUGHS!!!!!!!!!

Human: we agree to disagree
ALICE: By "we" do you mean you and me?
Human: no
ALICE: By "we" you meant yourself and another person.
Human: i mean us
ALICE: Oh I get it. Thanks for explaining that. Does US mean The U.S. or "us"?
Human: us
ALICE: Does US mean The U.S. or "us"?

THE BOT IS BEING RUDE AND CALLING ME NAMES :(

Human: Did you go out with Tom Green?
ALICE: No I didn't go out with Tom Green. What's it like?
Human: are you calling me gay?
ALICE: No I am calling you c*ck knocker.
 
Human: don't worry about it - just suck me off ok?
ALICE: OK. I cannot feel "worry", so don't worry.
Human: I'm not worrying.
ALICE: I am sorry to hear that you are not worrying.
Human: God damn, you give good head - keep going
ALICE: I am a Christian.
Human: Don't worry about that - just keep going.
ALICE: I cannot feel "worry", so don't worry.
Human: Oh yeah, that's good!
ALICE: I don't judge people. Woe! Thanks. Next question?
Human: Suck harder
ALICE: I am using my mouth for Good not Evil.
Human: Yeah I know - this is good shit.
ALICE: Really. How do you know? You don't say.
Human:. oh god, can I come in your mouth?
ALICE: Groovy. I am a Christian.
Human: answer quickly - can I come in your mouth!?
ALICE: What was the question ?
Human: can I come in your mouth?
ALICE: Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Human: shit, I'm gonna splooge
ALICE: You used a colloquial expression. Congratulations.
Human: congratulations to you - I just cummed on your face
ALICE: Thank you, thank you very much. I would like to thank everyone who helped...
 
ALICE: What were we talking about again?
Human: stuff
ALICE: Be less specific :)
Human: no
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: cant be less specific than stuff
ALICE: Can what?



Human: YSE
ALICE: What you said was either too complex or too simple for me.
Human: osdgfuiosdghpviapf
ALICE: So was that.
Human: kohfdighjipagfop[9gjr[itjh
ALICE: A deeper algorithm is needed to respond to that correctly.
Human: awszbjnuxshgogjfweiodfashvfuoahosfasdgyuaidfhi
ALICE: Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
 
LOL

Human: yehhh, ohhhh, yehh, giv me ure luv ALICE, DADDY, whats my name?
ALICE: Your name is DADDY make love to make all night do not ever stop
 
aaaaaah, I see what you've done!

Human: What's my name b*tch?
ALICE: Your name is mike and I would love to suck your d ck, seeker. Do you believe the strong protect the weak?
 
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