Funniest what-Iwould-do-if-HL2-didnt-work

No, I like the US. I use to have that avatar on other forums, but now since I could have animated gifs here I just added the 'wheel' cause its on my homepage and I like that (dont know what they are called in english ;))
 
Well if Half-Life 2 didn't work for me I would sneak into Valve as Gordon, scare all the employees by mouthing "boo" and steal a copy of HL 2 what actually would work.


Yeah...not very funny I know....bleh.....
 
I would go into Valve HQ naked, lay down on the floor in gabe's office, and refuse to leave until he personally fixes the problem.

and if the security tries to take me away I'll pee on them.
 
ill probaly make a lifesize controlable strider...and drive it and squish valve
 
Guide if HL2 doesnt work. /-Classified-\

Step 1. Get angry
Step 2. ???
Step 3. Game Works!!!
 
Originally posted by razorblade kiss
I would snap the CD in half, drive to the mall with one of the pieces of sharp cd, and find the asshole clerk who sold me the game. Even though its not his fault I need someone to blame, and someone to hurt. I would slice off his heels, cut off his ass and glue them both to his head. I would the go to the escalator outside the store, and take all the HL2 boxes and throw them on it, the pour gas all over the escalator and the HL2 boxes, and light them on fire. It would be a big moving, rotating, swirling HL2 fire storm. After I watched them burn. I would get into my car and drive into a wall at 145 miles per hour, launch out the front window with my sharp piece of cd in my hand, fly all the way to Valve headquarters and in mid air while flying chop off Gabes head while screaming 9/30! 9/30!!!. After I landed I would hit up a bar, and threaten the bar tender with my cd shard for a free alcohalic beverage of my choice. I would then light him on fire as well. After I vented a little bit, and released my anger I would find some drunk girl from the bar to drive me all the way back to Connecticut to find that Valve released a patch that woulda fixed all the problems with HL2 not working. And then I would kill myself.
Click to expand...

omg that made me laugh so hard. if I had a say, he wins :)
 
I would find diffrent PC parts so the game worked.
 
wonder why the game isnt working, realize that the game is working but the content wasnt up to valve's standards so they left most of it in the \deleted scenes\ dir on the cd.
start up the game and play through the hl1 remade levels using the all new high poly "cut from cs:cz so they could be used in HL2" Ritual models.
curse
throw tantrum
curse some more
make a Gabe Newell voodoo doll and let my dog have its way with it.... with RL repurcussions to gabe of course.
 
If the game did not work on my machine, I would hack into Valve and steal the source... - oh wait, been there - done that.
 
I would grab my trusty crowbar and smash up Gabe Newell's car real goodly
 
that's really "wellly", asonjsurfer.
Click to expand...
Yeah I know the adjective "good" cannot be conjugated. It was a joke to enphasize the low intelligence associated with smashing a car up with a crowbar.
 
wonder what kind of car gabe drives. maybe a nice big cadillac?
 
Originally posted by Lil' Timmy
it's tiananmen square destrukt.
Click to expand...

In Chinese it reads like Tian An Men Guang Chang. (Guang Chang means square)

If HL2 does not work I will get hypnotized and brain-washed and wipe HL2 totally out of my mind.
 
Well i think not everything is perfect. Maybe i bought the cd which was corrupted.

So i will go back to the shop and change another cd.

If come back home and still cannot work, i will go back to my hardware vendor and i scream on them :devil:

If i cannot contact my hardware vendor, then i will just look at the half life 2 screenshots and read your comments. I will just visualize. ;(

I will never blame valve for anything.
 
Originally posted by Murray_H
I would dress up as a headcrab, go to Valve's offices and then jump on Gabe's head, not letting go until he fixes it personally
Click to expand...

The ol' headcrab headlock. Nice.
 
I would sit there staring at the monitor for around a minute quietly. As the hate would well up I would see my monitor leave my room through the window with my tower following closely behind with everything around me glowing red. I would then appologise to my house mates for the disruption at 2 in the morning. then with my newly aquired "free time" I would ring Gabe at home to answer "WHY?!?? WHY?!??"

After discovering he had done it just to annoy everyone because he got hacked and doesnt see why anyone else should have a good time, I' d drive a radio controlled plane with a grenade tied to the undercarrage into the valve building.

I would then serve my 10 years, out on good behavour and buy a new pentium 8 with 10gigs of ram and a geforce 9800 earnt from my hard labour making I H8 GA8E number plates that sold surprisingly well.
 
Id sneak into Gabes house, replace his shoes with the same kind, only 1 1/2 sizes too small. Flip all the doors in his house upside down and then disassemble his keyboard and rearrange the keys so that his homerow says GABESUCKZ.
 
there are quite a few ... errr... disturbing... posts to say the least in here.. I wonder what a psychoanalyst would say.. hahaha

nonetheless:

I'd probably spontaneously combust from trying to keep my anger of dodgy releases/patches/compatibility in... - like so :flame:
 
i would through it in the trash and play doom 15
thats probably abought the time it will come out
 
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