Goldeneye: Source Mod Leader Dies

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sterno said:
yes I'm fully aware it's mental health issue, however I was answering his assertation that poverty justified his taking his own life
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I'm sure he can speak for himself but from the context those comments appeared to be in reply to Shasta's ones, about poverty not being a serious or permanent thing, so you guys are all tying yourselves in conversational knots. Poverty is one of the many factors which can contribute to making life unlivable for some people.

Also a note on the arson issue: from the news article it appeared to me that he tried to kill himself with a charcoal burner, something used commonly in those group suicides in cars in japan recently. Confusingly, the article said the fire was 'deliberately set' but was also a 'by-product' of the guy's attempt at suicide. I read that as meaning that the fire will officially go down as arson, but he didn't necessarily intend the fire - just to kill himself with the charcoal burner, which is usually a very quiet way to go. It seems strange to me in the first place that anyone would try to kill themselves by arson - you'd need amazing self-control, certainly more than if you were killing yourself for 'curiosity'. Bottom line: I don't think the guy intended to set anything on fire.
 
Laivasse said:
I'm sure he can speak for himself but from the context those comments appeared to be in reply to Shasta's ones, about poverty not being a serious or permanent thing, so you guys are all tying yourselves in conversational knots. Poverty is one of the many factors which can contribute to making life unlivable for some people.
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I hadnt followed what was said previously, I only directly responded to his post
 
Ugh...

1.) None of you here knew him. I know it probably sounds nice or "PC" to do the /mourn thing, but please don't. You didn't know him, just like you don't know the numerous other people who commit suicide around the world. While the idea of somebody taking their own life is pity-inducing to an extent, let's not pretend he was so close to us that we need to be sensitive in expressing our opinions on such a matter.

2.) The way he committed suicide was atrocious. Just take some pills, and while using a gun may leave a mess, at least it doesn't destroy somebody's property and possibly endanger the lives of other people.

3.) If I'm going to take his comments at face value and he actually committed suicide out of sheer curiosity, then it ends here. The guy was an idiot. But as has been said before, this was probably not the whole deal. His poetic waxing about the nature of the universe and its relation to the life was just a trite, romanticized sendoff.

More than likely, he had personal problems. Now, I don't think any of us are in a position to say wether or not these were severely legitimate problems or if his suicide was just an extreme overreaction. But before I get any lip about how I don't understand the sort of psychological anguish suiciders go through, let's get something clear.
I've been there. I went through a long stretch of my life in which I was utterly miserable. I had a complete social cutoff. I was constantly feeling like shit and contemplated suicide many times, coming close twice. It took every ounce of my energy to look at myself in the mirror and convince msyelf that I wasn't going to stoop so low as to killing myself, and I finally sought help for my problems (which I won't go into here).
I attend therapy on a weekly basis and take anti-depressants daily. I feel better now, but there are still times where I sink back. But the important part is that I tried to solve my problems. You may scoff at it, but you have no idea how comparatively easy it can be to put a pistol in your mouth or chug a bottle of painkillers instead of simply talking to somebody.

And this is what he did. He took the easy way out, with complete disregard for his friends, family, and even his ****ing neighbors. It's tragic, but it was his choice, and not in some spur of the moment fashion. He sat down, wrote out his suicide note, and then set his home on fire. It's sad that a life has been lost, but there is nothing respect-worthy about the intent behind his actions.
 
Was it a stupid and selfless act?

Quite possibly.

Would that make it any less tragic or sad?

No.
 
In the following I'm not talking about this specific suicide since I don't know the facts but I'm talking about suicide in general. I think it needs to be said at the expense of de-railing a thread. (Sorry) I really do care that some people go through life without much of anything positive. Desipite the tone this is really out of care and not out of a "you're weak!" mindset.

I agree with Shasta.

I've had to deal with a lot of crap in my life (not pity seeking, statement) and the primary cause for most suicides is either never having the fighting mentality or loosing it at some point. I've had to deal with a debilitating disease since 9 years old. It caused/causes both intense physical and some psychological pain. Does this mean I have an excuse? Nope... If I ever kill myself it's because I decided it's not worth the fight at some point. It's a mentality. Those who can't find a way to stop feeding negative thoughts and increasing down-ness will eventually reach the point of suicide if both the negative thought magnifies and the world pressure keeps increasing. Stop feeding it! It's that simple. Say "Bring it on! I'm tough!" and really mean it. If you don't want to try and expend that fighting energy then you are lazy in my opinion. You would rather just sit still instead of puting forth ALL your energy to solve the problem. Yeah, life sucks at times but you have to deal with what you were given and suck it up! (or simply die) It's fine by me if you want to die, but do it quietly and over time break relations with everyone you know so it limits the impact on the world.

I'm saying this because I'm sure some who are reading this will be prone to suicide in their future or are now. It's a common thing. I wish I could do it at times when suffering is greater than pleasure but I won't because that's a pussy attitude quite frankly. Life is what you make of it. You won't kill yourself as long as you hold that mentality. You can try and psycho-analyze this if you want but I will just say it frankly, suck it up, there is always someone worse off and then someone better off. Life sucks for some but I'm sure your not the worse off. I'm not. Try and focus on what good you have instead of everything that goes wrong. I'm not saying blind yourself, I'm saying simply tell off the negative. You will see it go away slowly if you really do tell it off. Trust me, it works. Look at those guys who loose legs, why are they so obsessed with climbing mountains without limbs? Because they are telling off thier negative. They arn't going to let it get them down and because of thier suffering they will accomplish even more than they would have without it. Thier suffering makes them greater.

Also, if you manage to become one of those "Hard core acomplish anything" guys don't forget to keep your heart. The whole willpower/accomplishment mindset tends to destroy your care for others the more you magnify it. I almost fell into that trap. I wouldn't post this if it wasn't from the heart, I would have simply chuckled and thought he was pathetic. That's evil...
 
The guy had problems, now they're sorted. Don't feel sorry for him, he got what he wanted. He obviously wanted to die because there's always another way out, even if it's a difficult one.
 
suicide.jpg

May David Duchovny... errr.. Nickster rest in peace.
 
ericms said:
You don't care that he was killed yet you mourn over something that you just said you didn't care about!? I'm confused about what makes this so upsetting for you. Somehow we've been brought up to think of death as a terrible and sad thing. The only thing that is terrible about it is the way some people tend to reach it, which you ignore apparently.
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I don't care how he was killed. It's that he was killed. You misunderstood my post.
 
Grey Fox said:
Suicide is not joke, you are a joke, a sick perverted, pathetic, arrogant joke of nature. I sick and tired of know it all jokers like you. You do not know his situation, you do not know his feelings, you do know not his pains you do not know him, and most of all you do not know jack shit about suicides.
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So, why do you think you are an expert on what I know? You have no idea who I am, or anything about my life.

Grey Fox said:
Suicides are not always to end your pain, many times they are to end the pain of others, and calling it weak and easy way out is nothing less then shortsighted idiocy. There is no other thing as unnatural as taking ones own life, there is no other thing that takes as much will as taking one's own life, it go's against are most basic instinct, it go's against everything we have been told. And sometimes it's necesairy because of curcumstances which only an idot like you can claim to know, and only an idiot like you can think he can judge and jury.
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Haven't you heard of people that used to be slaves, beaten, raped, had to eat bugs to survive, endure it all for years, and then they take charge of their lifes, perhaps someone finally liberates them, and they end up being rich, or at least do well for themselves, and carry on with their lives? I bet you haven't, because you just make excuses as to why you/others should kill themselves, instead of finding reasons to live. If they followed your advice, they would be dead, and wouldn't have had the chance to finally enjoy life, especially after all that suffering. It would have all been for nothing.

Idiot.

You know what? I take it back. Anyone as whiny and sad as you should commit suicide. Go write a poem, about how you can't pay for food this week, cuddle your teddy bear, hug a tree, and top yourself in an evironmentally friendly way.

I find the quote in your sig so ironic. You don't deal with concepts that aren't what you are used to very well, do you?
 
Shasta said:
So, why do you think you are an expert on what I know? You have no idea who I am, or anything about my life.



Haven't you heard of people that used to be slaves, beaten, raped, had to eat bugs to survive, endure it all for years, and then they take charge of their lifes, perhaps someone finally liberates them, and they end up being rich, or at least do well for themselves, and carry on with their lives? I bet you haven't, because you just make excuses as to why you/others should kill themselves, instead of finding reasons to live. If they followed your advice, they would be dead, and wouldn't have had the chance to finally enjoy life, especially after all that suffering. It would have all been for nothing.

Idiot.

You know what? I take it back. Anyone as whiny and sad as you should commit suicide. Go write a poem, about how you can't pay for food this week, cuddle your teddy bear, hug a tree, and top yourself in an evironmentally friendly way.

I find the quote in your sig so ironic. You don't deal with concepts that aren't what you are used to very well, do you?
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I say, calm down.
 
Shasta said:
So, why do you think you are an expert on what I know? You have no idea who I am, or anything about my life.



Haven't you heard of people that used to be slaves, beaten, raped, had to eat bugs to survive, endure it all for years, and then they take charge of their lifes, perhaps someone finally liberates them, and they end up being rich, or at least do well for themselves, and carry on with their lives? I bet you haven't, because you just make excuses as to why you/others should kill themselves, instead of finding reasons to live. If they followed your advice, they would be dead, and wouldn't have had the chance to finally enjoy life, especially after all that suffering. It would have all been for nothing.

Idiot.

You know what? I take it back. Anyone as whiny and sad as you should commit suicide. Go write a poem, about how you can't pay for food this week, cuddle your teddy bear, hug a tree, and top yourself in an evironmentally friendly way.

I find the quote in your sig so ironic. You don't deal with concepts that aren't what you are used to very well, do you?
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I´m no expert on you but your comments in this thread are enough justification for mine. I´ve heard it all, and none it gives you the ability to apply your sick and twisted moral on his situation or him. Nor does it justify your comments on him. You do know jack shit about what he was going trough nor why he killed himself, you perception of why someone would sucide are clearly incredible narrow and not open to any outside ideas. And even if it was just a screw loose in his head, and there was no good reason to kill himself.

Then it´s still sad, just like it´s sad to see people born without lims or with the down syndroom. I do not justify his deed, but I do not go around condemning theming them just to boost my internet ego. Certainly not when so little information is availible, I do not hide behind some preset moral or prejudice or stigmata against suicide, and condemn people, joke about their deaths or lives. And to be quite clear, wanting to understand why thease people did it instead of just judging them like they have been judged for centuries by superstitious and narrowminded people go´s against the ruling moral, so if anything my sig is nor ironic. It´s mearly a statement that you sofar have proved.
 
Right; why don't all you bitches who go on about 'good or bad' just shut the **** up and go watch Bambi 2 together.

Let's be perfectly clear and sober about this thing:

1) nickster killed himself
2) this is a shame because it basically either shows that he wanted out of life and tried anything possible to stay alive but lost in the end OR he was a waste of oxygen because he was bound to kill himself anyway
3) even though his death is tragic, the way he committed suicide wasnt only completely stupid; it was also out of disrespect of other peoples lives and homes.

Personally I believe that suicide is only an option when there is NO way out, and even then I'd rather die of old age in misery then set my house on fire or blow up half a cityblock with a fertilizer bomb. It's clear that he (the person who committed suicide) didnt think about his way of suicide or was just too confused to think about it.

All in all; what are we talking about here?

Are we having a suicide vs living confrontation? A 'what the **** got into him to burn his apartment down?' conversation?

And besides this all. I believe that although this is indeed mod community news it would be pretty useless to bring as a seperate thread. No offense to you Ennui; because I know you do this out of respect for the dead guy. But I believe that having people post 'R.I.P. dude :(' when they didnt even know the guy is pretty useless and only fills up server space. It would be like going to some random funeral; drinking tea and eating the cookies and then leaving after waving goodbye. It has nothing to do with the family nor does it affect the dead guy's family and is all in all pretty useless.

Now; before some of you decide to jump over this message with their fundamentalistic left wing or right wing brainwashed arses stand still and think about this all.

Some guy killed himself; almost torched down his apartment complex in the process; his family grieves; the end.

- Pax
 
Shasta said:
Next you will say that suicide bombing in the name of your country / religion is a good thing too....

No stupid government, or idealistic belief of "greater powers" is worth throwing away the one and only life you have. Neither is losing your crappy job, or being dumped, or money, or anything else.

Suicide isn't sad, it's a joke. Don't cry for anyone stupid and weak enough to do it. Go get an icecream, root the missus, or play a game. If you have to feel sorry for someone, feel sorry for their family, for being related to such a loser.
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Hey if that is what you are thinking, then you are taking a free ticket trip to banville. Flame me if you want for saying that, just hope that you don't get a free way ticket to banville for flamming and mocking a dead person.


Anyway, rest in peace, Goldeneye: source leader.
 
Double_Blade said:
Hey if that is what you are thinking, then you are taking a free ticket trip to banville. Flame me if you want for saying that, just hope that you don't get a free way ticket to banville for flamming and mocking a dead person.


Anyway, rest in peace, Goldeneye: source leader.
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Since when was mocking a dead person ban-worthy?

And since when do you care if this particular person is dead?
 
Ludah said:
Since when was mocking a dead person ban-worthy?

And since when do you care if this particular person is dead?
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At least I care for human beings. And since you hate me, why bother replying to me?

Grow up Ludah, or at least, pull the brain out of your ass and put it back on your head.
 
Double_Blade said:
Hey if that is what you are thinking, then you are taking a free ticket trip to banville. Flame me if you want for saying that, just hope that you don't get a free way ticket to banville for flamming and mocking a dead person.


Anyway, rest in peace, Goldeneye: source leader.
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How is he taking a trip to banville if he's expressing his opinion?

Since when do you determine banning policy on halflife2.net?

I'm pretty sure your post in general was pretty useless due to the fact that its just more oil on an already burning fire.

It would be best if you just didnt post crap like this at all. For Halflife2.net's sake and peace.

You just dropped by 10 points on the Pax schale of respect and intelligence.

- Pax
 
Pax said:
How is he taking a trip to banville if he's expressing his opinion?

Since when do you determine banning policy on halflife2.net?

I'm pretty sure your post in general was pretty useless due to the fact that its just more oil on an already burning fire.

It would be best if you just didnt post crap like this at all. For Halflife2.net's sake and peace.

You just dropped by 10 points on the Pax schale of respect and intelligence.

- Pax
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Wow since when I got points on your schale of respect and intelligence?

But then again, your behaviour is similar to the anti-game attorney Whacko Jacko Jack Thompson.
 
Double_Blade said:
Wow since when I got points on your schale of respect and intelligence?

But then again, your behaviour is similar to the anti-game attorney Whacko Jacko Jack Thompson.
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Rofl how?
 
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