Make a Wish, and have it corrupted - Half-Life Edition

[pistolero!]

Example: I wish I'd work at Black Mesa - Granted, but you'll die due to an elevator accident at your first day.
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I wish I could have my own HEV Suit.

 

[Narvi]

Example: I wish I'd work at Black Mesa - Granted, but you'll die due to an elevator accident at your first day.
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I wish I could habe my own HEV Suit.

Granted, but after the High Altitude Balloon experiment succeeds, you lose it.

I wish I had my own pet debeaked headcrab.

 

[pistolero!]

Granted, but it will drown in your bathtub.

I wish there would be a Half-Life movie

 

[Lizardizzle]

granted, but it's CRAP

I wish i had a pet antlion that only hurt others when i tell it to.

 

[simonjedi]

Some one will throw bugbait on you and it'll kill you

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I want a gravity gun

 

[Atomic_Piggy]

Granted, but it's part of your arm and has a mind of its own. :O

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I wish I had a Hunter bodyguard.

 

[Narvi]

Granted, but then it kills your teacher and you get dissected in a secret lab somewhere to find out how alien contact has changed you.

 

[Druckles]

OP should have been more specific on how this game works, btw .

And Narvi... you got it before, you just forget to ask for a wish?

I wish I met Barney.

Couldn't think of anything better.

 

[Pesmerga]

Granted, but you're forced into eternal singalongs with the purple dinosaur.


I wish I had applied for uni right after HS ended.

 

[AJ Rimmer]

Granted, but you're forced into eternal singalongs with the purple dinosaur.


I wish I had applied for uni right after HS ended.

Granted, but you die of super-aids in a violent explosion of vomiting, pain and slight ringing in the ears a week later.

I wish my copy of Half-life was made of solid gold.

 

[Druckles]

Edit:

Granted, but you can't play it, shelve it, it falls off and kills you.

I wish I had a ASHPD

 

[Calhoun]

Granted, but you'll get stuck in a loop between two portals forever.

I wish I had a Combine APC.

 

[Atomic_Piggy]

Granted, but you'll die in a car crash that will kill your granny.

I wish Alyx liked me, not that pussy ass Gordon.

 

[Pesmerga]

Granted, but you die of super-aids in a violent explosion of vomiting, pain and slight ringing in the ears a week later.

So original...

 

[Emporius]

Granted, but you realize she is only a shitload of 1s and 0s, making sex incredibly difficult.

I wish I had a real gravity gun

 

[Druckles]

Granted, but you'll die in a car crash that will kill your granny.

I wish Alyx liked me, not that pussy ass Gordon.

Was going to ask that, but thought I'd better not be the one to wish for it

Granted, but she leaves you for Barney and takes your two children with her.

I wish I had a Combine suit?

 

[jerkasaur]

granted, but you'd have half your internal organs removed.

I wish I were the first to break the no breeding rule. :naughty:

 

[pistolero!]

Granted, but you'll have to do it with Kleiner in front of your girlfriend. If you don't have one, you'll have to marry him.

I wish I was dead.

Spoiler

Someone had to say it.

 

[Acepilotf14]

But turns out you just respawn.

I wish I had a hunter for a pet.

 

[Ridge]

Granted, but it poops flechettes in all your shoes

I wish Episode 3 would be here in time for Xmas

 

[urumax]

Granted, but because pf the glitches and errors due to the rush of making it, there will be no combines or zombies to fight against.

I wish Gordon could carry 10 clips for the Pulse Rifle

 

[Druckles]

Granted, but the radiation and heat from them causes your head to explode.

I wish I had a save/load feature.

 

[Crash]

You got it Druckles, but your save files get corrupted, and you have to play the whole game (of life?) over again...

I wish I could have Alyx and Judith, at the same time....

 

[Ennui]

You do, but it's after they've both succumbed to the deadly headcrabs and become zombies.

I wish the cake wasn't a lie.

 

[Acepilotf14]

Granted, the cake lied about not being a lie.

I wish I had a companion cuuube.

 

[ellimanest]

Granted but it falls into an incinerator when you put it down

I wish i had Lamarr back

 

[Druckles]

Granted, but it gets into your lab experiment and blows you up.

I wish I had GLaDOS

 

[Lizardizzle]

granted, but she cant stop herself from filling your room with a deadly neurotoxin, so she fills up your room with a deadly neurotoxin

I wish I had a $1000 gaming computer that had vista and dx10

 

[Pesmerga]

Granted, but it's outdated in a week.

I wish I had awesome pajamas.

 

[Ridge]

Granted, but they are filled with lead from China.

 

[Cpt Tenacious]

Granted, but it's outdated in a week.

I wish I had awesome pajamas.

Granted but the butt-flap buttons are borken.

I wish i had Alyx pr0n.

 

[morgs]

Granted, but you'd be seen as sad.

I wish Eli hadn't died.

 

[soulslicer]

Granted, but..wait how do I answer this? Nice one there

I wish I had an ar2 rifle

 

[Acepilotf14]

Granted but the butt-flap buttons are borken.

I wish i had Alyx pr0n.

I can deliver. /shiftyeyes/ pm me.. :0


Anyway,
Granted, but all your friends have AR3's. Get with the times!

I wish I was unbanned from hl2.net community chat.

 

[Atomic_Piggy]

Granted, but when you come back everyone refuses to speak to you.

I wish I could rule the Combine, be immortal and all das shit...

 

[Lokizen]

Granted, but Gordon would find a way to kick your ass anyway.

I wish I would win the Lottery.

 

[GM)Paravin.]

Granted, but you loose the money in a toilet. (Wth?)

I wish I had a Strider..

 

[Ridge]

Granted, but your parents wont let you keep it because it cant fit in thouse.....and keeps skewering your neighbors.

I wish Mr. Friendly made it into HL1...

 

[Narvi]

Granted, but then he rapes you.

That last one was way too obvious.

And Narvi... you got it before, you just forget to ask for a wish?

Ooops.

Er. I wish I had my own Dog.

 

[Atomic_Piggy]

Granted, but Gordon would find a way to kick your ass anyway.

:frown:

Anywayz, granted, but he isn't a robot dog like you hoped.

I wish I was superatrractive so all the girls are all over me.