Make a Wish, and have it corrupted - Half-Life Edition

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Granted, but those girls are fugly!
I wish I have a crowbar!
 
Granted, but it is also a dildo with a mind of its on - it ****s your ass in your sleep.

I wish I had some headcrab pie.
 
Granted but it's a poison headcrab and you die.

I wish I was a Zombie.
 
Granted, but...well the downside is kind of obvoius...

I wish I had the Gman's "powers."
 
Atomic_Piggy said:
Granted, but...well the downside is kind of obvoius...

I wish I had the Gman's "powers."
Click to expand...

Granted, but then the actual Gman comes and assrapes you.

With a briefcase.

I wish I had my own Citadel.
 
Granted, but our Beloved Gordon Freeman blows you and it up.

I wish I had a horde of Obident Combine at my control.
 
Granted, but betray you for Cuck norris.

I wish I could fly. In space. Without dying.
 
Poof. Done. But it takes forever to get anywhere, thus you find it boring. Not to mention, damn cold...

I wish Druckles and urumax could just be friends...:cheers:
 
Granted, but who the f*ck is urumax, still, urumax "accidentally" throws Druckles with a barrel.



I wish I... get a fast headcrab roast, which isn't poisoned, or alive, or the one who brings me it, wouldn't rape, kill, throw me.
 
Granted, but you eat it at a Chinese restaurant only to find out it's actually cat, and you perish from an MSG overdose.

I wish I could have a strider to ride
 
Granted, but you fall off one day

I wish I was a barnacle.
 
Granted, but you accidently catch a acidlion.

I wish I could meet Merle IRL.
 
Druckles said:
Granted, but you fall off one day

I wish I was a barnacle.
Click to expand...

Granted, but a geeky supersoldier in tight orange spandex feeds you a flaming barrel of diesel fuel.

I wish I could create root beer out of thin air.

EDIT: Curses!

Iron_cube said:
Granted, but you accidently catch a acidlion.

I wish I could meet Merle IRL.
Click to expand...

Granted, but your drooling and/or heavy breathing scares her away.
 
Granted but you die from the stuff

I wish I was Gordon Freeman
 
Granted, but when Alyx asks you to have sex, you can't say anything.

I wish Episode Three were finished...
 
Lokizen said:
Granted, but when Alyx asks you to have sex, you can't say anything.

I wish Episode Three were finished...
Click to expand...

:O Nooo!

Granted, but it was rushed because of your wish and it's crap.

I wish I had teleportation technology
 
Druckles said:
:O Nooo!

Granted, but it was rushed because of your wish and it's crap.

I wish I had teleportation technology
Click to expand...

Granted, but you will fall and die like the scientist from OP4.

I wish I'd have a date with the G-Man
 
Granted, but he'll say things like "We'll wake up tomorrow, and smell the ashes" all night long


I wish Alyx was a real person!
 
Granted but she is your mother.

I wish I owned d0g.
 
Granted, but it's Dog--

I wish I had a good wish to wish.
 
granted, but she constantly pesters you to hurry up and get in the car. (for [RE] Leon)

:edit: damn fast posting! :(

--------------
(pesmerga) granted, but wishing that you had a good wish used up your wish. haha.

I wish I had a credit card with one billion dollars in it
 
Granted, but that money would be useless after the 7 hour war.


I wish I had a portal gun.
 
Granted but I steal it.

I have no wish. I just got a portal gun without using a wish. I'm not about to f**k that up!
 
(corpral shepard) you-somehow- goet a portal gun, but the government find you useing it, so they steal it to perform tests and lock you up so the news of handheld portals never gets out.

i wish i had a corn snake and a proper tank for it. :)
 
lol If she was my mother? I'd learn to kick ass at 3 years old. And have good looks.

Granted, but he craps in your bed and you don't know it.
 
[RE]Leon said:
lol If she was my mother? I'd learn to kick ass at 3 years old. And have good looks.
Click to expand...

I kind of assumed you were wanting to have sexy time.

I wish that my next wish has no adverse side effects
 
It doesn't, but that's because you didn't wish for anything.

I wish it was me in the hazard suit that day, not Gordon.
 
granted but you die soon after the resonance cascade

I wish "sometimes, I [wouldn't] dream... about cheese

off topic: ennui has got to be the best username I've seen on a forum "Je suis ennui!"
 
blackout62: granted, but the mice in the cheese dreams break out of the dream and eat you and your family... and your dog.

i wish i was homestarrunner. :)
 
lizard said:
i wish i was homestarrunner. :)
Click to expand...

Granted, problem is. . .
You're Homestarrunner.
--------------------------------

I wish that the next episode of half life will be one of the most surreal and thought provoking video games I have ever experienced.
 
Granted, but then you became so addicted to it that you died of starvation

I wish that Gordon Freeman talks.
 
granted, but, as it turns out, he's Mexican.

i wish i had a time stopping watch that was invinsible, only worked when I used it, and the batteries could never run out (it can start time after it stops time too [ha! try to screw this one up].).
 
Granted, but even though it can start time again, you can't push the button to make that happen... because time is stopped!

I wish that Psychonauts had a worthy sequel and I got to play it without any long-term health consequences.
 
Granted, but you would lose it somewhere while it was stopped. :p

I wish I had an Alienware computer!

oops, quicker post than mine!
 
**NOT A WISH OR CORRUPTION OF ONE**

I thought this was supposed be related to half life in some way. Trry to stick to that idea guys.
 
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